


and you knew what it was (he is in love)

by yail



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Harry Potter Setting, Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Angst, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Growing Up, Hurt/Comfort, Jealous Victor Nikiforov, M/M, Multi, Slow Build, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-08
Updated: 2019-04-21
Packaged: 2019-06-07 00:20:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 81,367
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15206690
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yail/pseuds/yail
Summary: Here's what's normal for Katsuki Yuuri: playing Quidditch, practicing spells, keeping to himself.Here's what's not normal for Katsuki Yuuri: transferring to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry in his fourth year and getting to know his idol, International Quidditch Star Viktor Nikiforov.But maybe there's a reason they say love is the greatest magic of all.one night, he wakesstrange look on his facepauses, then says"you're my best friend"and you knew what it was(he is in love)—you are in loveby taylor swift





	1. one look

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _thinking all love ever does is break and burn and end / but on a wednesday in a café / i watched it begin again_

****“Do you reckon there’s really a squid in here or is it just a legend?”

“You’ll be able to tell me once you get in Slytherin and have to sleep right by the lake.”

“Or you could tell me right _now."_   The curly haired boy pushed his friend at lightning speed and she shrieked.  Her fingers dug into the wood, the tips of her long hair dipping into the ominous water.

Katsuki Yuuri grimaced as the canoe rocked back and forth.  He was just beginning to decide if that was how his experience at Hogwarts was going to be, he didn’t want any part of it when he saw the lights of the castle through the mist.  He let his grip on the boat's sides inch apart. Finger by finger.

“First years, come with me!  If you’re a transfer, follow Professor Snape.”  The directions came from a willowy figure with an unexpected authoritative voice.

Yuuri craned his neck as the boat hit rock, in time to see the woman head towards the doors.  He scrambled out of the boat, following the only taller students over to an unpleasant looking man with a large nose.  If it hadn’t been for his sallow skin, Yuuri was sure he would’ve blended in with the dark surroundings.

No one in the group said a word as they followed the bubbling first years into the castle, past the intimidating doors.  The bright mahogany floors and intricate lighting made Yuuri feel out of place.

“Oh, look!” exclaimed the girl who had been on his canoe.

The rest of the first years rushed around her and peered around the corner.

"It's the Great Hall!" cried out a boy and chatter broke out among the group.

“Silent,” said Professor Snape in a daunting voice and they immediately quieted, turning with wide eyes towards him.  A few backed up, tripping on the trails of each other’s cloaks.

“Thank you, Severus,” replied the older woman.

He nodded stiffly towards her and turned the corner.  Immediately, Yuuri could hear the noise of the hall dampen.

In the bright lighting of the castle, Yuuri recognized the woman as Professor McGonagall.  She had been the one who had approved of his transfer application and written him the news.  Her long, dark robes and pointy hat made her look a foot taller than she actually was.

“Transfers will go first, from youngest to oldest.  Following them will be first years in alphabetical order.  When your name is called, go around the corner and put on the Sorting Hat.” She gestured to where Professor Snape had disappeared. “After the hat Sorts you, you may join your house table.  Dinner will be served after the Sorting and a short speech from our Headmaster.”

Yuuri gulped.  He had known the Sorting was a necessary task, but he had wished it could be in private.  That meant the whole school was watching while—

“Poirier, Matthias.”

The skinny boy with curly blonde hair standing next to Yuuri walked forward with a timid gait.

Only ten seconds later, Yuuri heard a booming, “GRYFFINDOR!”

Professor McGonagall called another name and Yuuri began to consider what he knew about the houses, including their colors and traditional values.

That, and every house but Hufflepuff were hosting tryouts for a new Seeker that year. Considering Quidditch had been one of his reasons for coming, Yuuri had no trouble eliminating Hufflepuff. The first years on the canoe hadn’t been too fond of Slytherin and their sleeping arrangements, and Yuuri wasn't too keen on sleeping by the lake either.

Greatest of all, though, he knew with certainty that he wasn’t brave.  In fact, his timid and anxious personality was quite the opposite.

“Katsuki, Yuuri.”

His heart leapt out of his chest as he skittered over, receiving a firm nod from Professor McGonagall.  He had hoped his good grades from Mahoutokoro would be enough to get himself on her good side, but he was realizing quickly it would take a lot more.

A grand hall lay before him as he hurried towards the stool.  He wondered if the four tables could see how much he was shaking as he placed the dusty hat on his head. Choosing to ignore the hundreds of students in front of him, he instead studied the marvelous starry sky and glowing candles.

Yuuri knew the hat must’ve been magical.  It must be, in order to prod inside his mind and evaluate his personality.  But he hadn’t expected a gravelly voice to whatever enchantment was coursing through him.

 _Hmm, very studious and sensible,_ the hat considered.

 _Yes,_ Yuuri tried to send his agreement towards it. _I take comfort in knowledge._

_So you want Ravenclaw, eh?  Funny, you’ve got something else in you, I daresay you’re a—_

“GRYFFINDOR!”

Yuuri jumped up, sure the surprise was clear on his face.  It appeared a good percentage of the table covered in scarlet seemed to have the same reaction. Apparently stumbling up to the stool and twitchy fingers wasn’t typical Gryffindor behavior.

 _What?_   he shot at the hat in a last attempt.  There was a dreadful silence and Yuuri hastily placed it back on the stool and hurried down to the table.  Silently thanking the odds, he sat down next to a burly, dark haired boy he’d seen on the boats. He looked too old to be a first year and had foreign features etched across his face.

With the comfort someone next to him was going through the same thing that he was, Yuuri sat patiently through the remainder of the Sorting.

As the headmaster, Albus Dumbledore, rose to speak, Yuuri let his gaze wander across the Great Hall.  He tried not to linger too long on the Ravenclaw table where he longed to be, so he focused to where the Slytherins sat.  Unlike the excited looking Hufflepuffs or the silent Ravenclaws, most looked bored. His eyes swept the table past a group of tall boys and he felt his mouth drop open.

There, drumming his fingers on table, was the Seeker of the Quiberon Quafflepunchers himself—Viktor Nikiforov.

Yuuri’s throat went dry.  To say he was a fan of Viktor's was an understatement. Yet somehow he had always assumed Viktor had gone to Beauxbatons, which was closer to where he played for the Quafflepunchers.

Even seeing Viktor in such a toned down setting, at _school,_  seemed strange. He’d announced he’d be taking a year off of Quidditch so he could further pursue his studies, but it was hard to believe the star lived a life outside of the pitch.

Oh God.  He wouldn't try out for the Slytherin team, _would he_ _?_   If Yuuri had to play against _Viktor Nikiforov_ he was sure his hopes of helping his house win the Quidditch Cup were crushed.

His only comfort was that Viktor was a year older, so they wouldn’t have any classes together.  But _still—_

The only thing that stopped him from a full blown analysis of the situation was the sudden appearance of food in front of him.  A second later, a boy with long brown hair next to him spoke up.

“I’m Leo,” he said, offering one hand out while shoveling some pasta onto his plate with the other.

“And I’m Guang Hong,” added a shorter boy on the other side of Leo, leaning so he could meet Yuuri’s eyes.  “Where did you transfer from?”

“Ah,” Yuuri said with great relief that he wouldn’t have to be the one to initiate a conversation. “I’m Yuuri.  Mahoutokoro in Japan. I’m a fourth year.”

“Us too,” Guang Hong said kindly.  “Why’d you make the move?”

“The classes weren’t as in depth,” Yuuri swallowed his words, not wanting to sound stuffy.  Maybe it would’ve been okay at the Ravenclaw table, but not at _Gryffindor._  “And the Quidditch program wasn’t as organized.”

Leo looked up with interest at this.

“Don’t tell me,” he said.  “Seeker?”

“Er, yes,” Yuuri frowned.  Was that some sort of problem at Hogwarts?

“Me too,” Leo said.  “Heard there’s going to be a lot of competition this year.”

Guang Hong smiled politely and continued the conversation for a minute until it reached its end.  All the while, Leo piled food into his mouth, mumbling about how he hadn’t eaten in _hours._

It didn’t take long for Yuuri to feel alone again, so he listened in to the other conversations at the table and bit his lip.

Hogwarts was supposed to be his new beginning, where he could be whoever he wanted. More specifically, the more courageous version of himself that only came out when he was flying. So why did he feel more out of place than ever as he sat at the table of the brave, across the room from someone he had only dreamed to one day meet?

***

Yuuri’s first day was not going well.

He had woken up in a room with four other people, profusely wishing he could at least _sleep_ alone.  Breakfast was bustling with excitement, this time from all the houses.

Transfiguration was the first class of the day, one he dreaded the second he stepped in the door.  It appeared the desks were grouped in twos and he did not know anyone. That was, at least, except for Leo and Guang Hong who at least had the sympathy to give him an apologetic glance.  Eventually, a quiet girl by the name of Isabella made her way over and took the empty seat next to him.

Isabella ended up being nice enough, but Yuuri turned his attention towards taking down notes at everything Professor McGonagall said.  Thanks to his lack of friends, Yuuri was sure he had the best Transfiguration notes out of the whole class.

To his disappointment, Charms with Professor Flitwick, was with the Ravenclaws as well. By the time he and Isabella wound up sitting together again, Yuuri began to wish he had been put in Hufflepuff or Slytherin where he might at least find a friend.

Yet again, he found himself with nothing better to do than to take down everything Professor Flitwick said.  When he assigned an essay that received a groan from almost every student, Yuuri and Isabella both had no complaints.

Yes, Yuuri decided.  He definitely would’ve been better as a Ravenclaw.

Third period was free.  Yuuri sagged in relief when he recalled, and chose to opt out of lunch.  Instead, following the directions of several ghosts, he made it to the library to get a head start on the Charms homework.  Even if his social life was lacking, he could at least excel at what he came to Hogwarts to do.

His short lived victory turned into dismay the moment he saw how many people were filing into the library as third period started.  He had hoped for a quiet place to study, but there was at least one person at each table. Whispers spilled across the room and not a single book was open besides his own.  Understandably, Madam Pince was having a heart attack.

“Excuse me,” chirped a bright voice, and Yuuri spun around.

“May I sit here?”

“Oh...of course,” Yuuri stuttered.

The Thai boy swathed in oversize Hufflepuff robes sat down, sighing as he dropped his bag.

“Phichit Chulanont,” he grinned, holding out a hand.

“Katsuki Yuuri, but, er, call me Yuuri.  In Japan we say the last name first,” he said, shaking Phichit’s hand.

“Don’t worry.  The library isn’t always this crowded.  Wait until we’re a month in and no one will bother come here unless they want to get work done,” Phichit said.  “And you won’t have to worry about strangers wanting to sit with you.”

Yuuri couldn’t help but smile shyly back at him.

“You read my mind,” he admitted.  “I’m not the best at talking to people.”

“Well I haven’t seen you around before.  You’re a transfer, right?”

Yuuri nodded.

“That makes it ten times harder to talk to people.  You’d be surprised at how friendly people are in their first year.  By second year most people have found their cliques and it’s clear who’s at the top of the social ladder.”

“Who’s that?” Yuuri asked.  He had a good feeling it would be either the Gryffindors or Slytherins.

“A lot of the Quidditch players, usually the Seekers and Chasers.”  He dropped his voice to a whisper, as though he were about to tell a deep secret.  Or it could be because Madam Pince was straying closer to the pair. “Viktor Nikiforov and Christophe Giacometti, along with all their friends are the most popular.  It seems someone new asks each of them out every week.”

Yuuri swallowed hard.

“I-I’ll admit I’m a fan of his flying.  Viktor’s, I mean. You see, I’m a Seeker too.  Or, well, at least I was for the past three years at my old school.  I’m trying out this on Thursday.”

Phichit beamed at the news. “I’m a Chaser on the Hufflepuff team.  I got lucky, there were only four of us trying out for all three positions, so only one person got cut.”  He leaned in even closer, eyes shining. “And if you want any juicy secrets on Viktor, I’ve been in a few of his classes throughout the years.  I just came from Muggle Studies with him. It was a surprise he even took the class.”

“Why?” Yuuri inquired, entranced.  He had sworn he wouldn’t obsess over Viktor; he was probably already tired of people swooning over him from what he had just learned from Phichit.

“Well, nothing against him, but he comes from a rich, pureblood family.  Not the type of guy I would expect to try and learn about Muggles. I reckon he’s only taking it because it’s an easy class.  Then again, every class is easy for him.”

Yuuri felt his mouth go dry.  So Viktor was exactly who he wanted to be—charming, a great Quidditch player _and_ a star student.

Phichit must’ve taken his silence as a sign to change the subject so he straightened up and pulled his schedule out of his bag.  A few chocolate frog wrappers came with it, but he brushed them aside carelessly. They toppled onto the clean carpet, earning a glare from Madam Pince.

“Wanna compare?”

“I’m a fourth year,” Yuuri said with some guilt.  Having a friend in one of his classes would’ve been nice.

“I am too,” Phichit beamed, setting his schedule on the table.

“I thought you had classes with Viktor.”  A funny feeling was settling in Yuuri’s stomach.  “And he’s a fifth year, isn’t he?”

“Nope,” Phichit said.  “He’s a fourth year like us.  I’m pretty sure he’s a year older but the years got messed up when he moved or something.”

“Oh,”  Yuuri’s mind went in a thousand directions.  Instead of indulging on them, he dug into his bag and set his schedule onto the table next to Phichit’s.

Sure enough, they had three classes together.

“Look!” Phichit grinned. “We’ve got History of Magic first thing tomorrow, then Divination after lunch and Herbology right after that.  And the same thing on Friday!”

“I’m dreading History of Magic in the morning.  We had something similar at my old school and it was such a bore,” Yuuri said.  Even so, he couldn’t hide his cheeks which were growing warm with happiness. Phichit was easy to talk to, and classes together meant they could study together, a chance to get to know each other better.

“What?!” Phichit exclaimed out of nowhere. “You have two free blocks Wednesday morning? That means you can sleep in until, like, noon!”

Yuuri glanced at his schedule again—even though he’d memorized it the first day he’d gotten it—then took a look at Phichit’s.

“Well here,” he pointed, “you’ve got two free periods after lunch on Wednesday, you could go to bed right at noon!”

Phichit laughed. “You’re right.  Hey, what do you say about—”

“Third block is over! Get out of here and take your books with you!  Detention to anyone who leaves something behind!” Madam Pince bellowed with a menacing glint in her eyes.

Yuuri scrambled up. _Say something,_ he commanded himself.

“Er, maybe since we both have third block free we can meet Thursday again and study together?  It sounds like we’ll get some kind of homework in History of Magic,” he paused. “But only if you want to, obviously.  It’s totally fine if you don’t.”

Phichit placed a hand on his arm as he stood up.

“That’d be great, Yuuri!  We can even do it twice a week!  Meet every Monday and Thursday at this table?” he asked, his eyes sunny.

Yuuri let a smile spread across his face.  Finally, he was making a friend.

“Sounds good,” he wavered, trying not to sound too excited.

Madam Pince yelled again and the two winced.

“Never seen her that mad,” Phichit hissed out of the corner of his mouth.  “Better go. See ya, Yuuri!”

Madam Pince locked eyes with Yuuri, and he scurried away without another word.

***

Potions was held in the dim-lit dungeons with Professor Snape, whom Yuuri remembered from the previous night.  He was just beginning to wonder if he was part vampire, but that train of thought disappeared as fast as it had come.

It wasn’t because of the dozens of massive bronze cauldrons with bubbling green liquids and frothing foam spilling out of them.  Nor the hundreds of clear jars stacked to the ceiling, each filled to the brim with various shrubs or unknown body parts. Not even the looming look on Professor Snape’s face as he stood stoically, next to the chalkboard reading _Fourth Year Potions._

It was, however, the mass of students with green crests crowded around each other.

More specifically, Yuuri was staring at Viktor Nikiforov.

Granted, he’d spent a lot of time staring at Viktor Nikiforov in his years.  A few seconds captured on a poster, a blur in the air at the European Championships, a glimpse of his head through the Great Hall.

But the Viktor sitting near the front of the room was a very clear Viktor.  Alive and breathing and _normal_ Viktor.

His legs were propped up on the desk in front of him, and he was talking to a tall boy with blonde hair and emerald eyes.  Despite the carefree manner, he still looked polished and more than a little intimidating.

Yuuri willed himself to move forward, taking a seat in the far back of the room, as far away as he could from Viktor.  His hands were shaking, although he wasn’t sure why (actually, he was, Viktor Nikiforov was ten feet away from him).

“Silence,” drawled Professor Snape as he waved his wand at the board and a list appeared.

Yuuri pushed his glasses closer to his eyes and squinted and—oh _no._

“These will be your partners for the year.  You will take notes together, brew in the same cauldron, and work with them at all times.  You have one minute to re-arrange yourselves so you’re sitting next to them.”

Maybe it was a blessing, maybe it was a curse.  Maybe Yuuri needed new glasses. Or maybe, just maybe, right across from Yuuri’s name was one he knew all too well.

Yuuri tried to duck his head so he could be a little more conspicuous as he watched the tall boy stride over after saying a final remark to his blond friend.  He gave up halfway through and full on stared as Viktor came in full view.

“You’re Yuuri, right?” He smiled so brightly Yuuri thought he might faint.

“Er, yeah. How’d you know?”  He cleared the other side of the desk as Viktor plopped down next to him and pulled out the Potions textbook.

“You’re one of the two new kids here and I took a guess,” he said.  He tapped his fingers for a brief second, then turned towards Yuuri.

“Oh...right,” he mumbled.  Viktor opened his mouth again as if he were going to say something, but just as quickly, Professor Snape interrupted.

“Turn to page two hundred and eighty-one.  This will be your first assessment. You have until the end of class to complete the potion with your partner.  And if you wish to pass this class, I advise you start now.”

Yuuri gulped, looking to Viktor who had already paged through his textbook and pulled out a cauldron from under the desk.

“Excellent, it’s a Girding Potion,” Viktor said in a pleased manner. “I’ve done a thousand of these.”

“Y-you have?” Yuuri asked in astonishment.

“Only joking,” Viktor replied, grabbing a vial of fairy wings.  “I reckon closer to a hundred or so.”

“Right,” Yuuri gulped, glancing down at the textbook.  “Er, the first step is to add one set of fairy wings.”

“Already did that,” Viktor said, turning on the heat and humming. “We add the doxy eggs after it turns turquoise, right?”

Yuuri nodded feverishly.  He was beginning to realize Phichit hadn’t been exaggerating when he said Viktor was smart.  Yuuri was used to being the top of his class at Mahoutokoro, but it was becoming painfully clear that it would take a lot more than that at Hogwarts.

“This part usually takes fifteen minutes or so.”  The silver-haired boy shrugged. “So tell me about yourself.”  He propped his head on his hand and leaned on his elbow to stare at Yuuri with his brilliant blue eyes.

“Er, I play Quidditch.”  He immediately cursed at himself.   _Like Viktor would care about_ you _playing Quidditch._

“Ah! Me too!  Looks like we have something in common already.”  He glanced at the potion and turned the heat up as high as it could go.

“We-we’re not supposed to do that,” Yuuri hesitated.  “It says here it’s supposed to stay at a medium.”

“Don’t worry.  This just speeds it up.  Snape loves when you use shortcuts that aren’t in the book,” he paused. “Or at least if he sees the finished product and not the shortcut.”  He winced, like he’d discovered this himself before. Yuuri didn’t doubt it for a second.

“Sure,” he said in an effort to be easygoing.  It was clear Viktor knew what he was doing. “Er, are you trying out for Seeker for the Slytherin team?”

Viktor laughed, passing Yuuri the dragonfly thoraxes along with a knife.

“Unfortunately not.  Plus my little cousin is trying out this year and I wouldn’t want to take away his chance.  I’m fine with being on the Quafflepunchers.”

“But, you’re taking a break from them, right?” Yuuri insisted, nicking his finger and pulling it away with a hiss.

“So you keep up with my interviews?” Viktor grinned delightedly. “Always nice to meet a fan.”  He must have seen Yuuri’s shocked face before he hurried in, “I’m only joking, Yuuri. Are you trying out for the Gryffindor team?”

“Yeah,” Yuuri mumbled.  He didn’t think he’d ever get over how Viktor had said his name, drawing out the ‘u’s with an admirable smile. “I’m a Seeker too.”

“Excellent!” Viktor exclaimed. “If you ever want some pointers I’d be happy to watch and— _shit."_   He turned the heat down immediately as a plume of smoke came up from the cauldron.

 _"Nikiforov,"_  Professor Snape boomed, shooting both of them a poisonous glare.

“Sorry, Professor,” Viktor kept a charming grin on his face.  Turning back to Yuuri, he smiled deeper. “Should’ve been keeping an eye on that, sorry.  If we add the flying seahorses now we should be able to fix this.”

If it had been any other person who messed up the potion, Yuuri would’ve been furious.  But with those eyes, and that look, he realized with a sinking feeling that Viktor might be able to get away with anything.  So he didn’t bother mention that the seahorses were part of the second to last step, and instead returned a tentative smile.

“Okay,” he allowed, throwing a few of them in at a time until the cauldron turned a bright pink.

“Then the dragonflies,” Viktor said, leaning over to look at the half chopped dragonflies on Yuuri’s platter.  “Oh dear,” he remarked on afterthought and grabbed another vial of them, chopping them in an instant and throwing them in the cauldron.

Immediately, it turned the deep green they were looking for and Viktor waved Professor Snape over.

Yuuri flushed while Professor Snape examined the potion, staring down at his carelessly cut dragonflies.  The pieces were uneven and a puddle of the juices was collecting in the middle of the board. It hadn’t helped that talking to Viktor had made his hand shake out of control.

When Professor Snape approved of their potion, giving them both full marks and allowing them to leave early, Yuuri sighed into his seat.

“See ya Giacometti,” Viktor called to the blond boy he’d been sitting by at the beginning of class.  He was supervising Guang Hong as he added the doxy eggs into the potion.

Yuuri remembered the last name from what Phichit had told him earlier.  So _that_ was Viktor’s best friend, Christophe Giacometti.

“You better be at the party on Thursday.” Christophe winked back and they shared a secret smile.

“Wouldn’t miss it for the world,” Viktor replied, throwing his bag over his shoulder.

Yuuri realized he was staring and he gathered his textbook and pushed it into his bag.  As Viktor reached the door, Yuuri followed him out, all the while wondering how he was going to survive potions for the rest of the year.

***

The next morning was considerably better than Monday.  Remembering how Quidditch had been common ground for both Phichit and Viktor, Yuuri brought it up again to Leo and Guang Hong.  Leo was all too excited to talk about Quidditch with him, and didn’t seem put off that they were trying out for the same position.  Even Guang Hong threw in a comment every few minutes.

By the time breakfast had ended, Yuuri was in a much better mood.  As the three strolled into the History of Magic room, he felt a warm jolt knowing that he could actually sit by someone he knew.  Leo and Guang Hong were quick to find a desk together, so he walked over to where Phichit sat, chatting to a good looking boy.

Just as he was beginning to doubt Phichit, wondering if he would rather sit with the boy he was talking to, he turned around with a grin.

“Yuuri! Meet Michele, he’s the Seeker on the Hufflepuff team.” He gestured for Yuuri to sit. “Michele, this is Yuuri, he’s trying out for Gryffindor.”

Yuuri wasn’t sure if he liked Phichit introducing him as the guy trying out for Gryffindor; his plan had been to lie low so if he didn’t make the team he would disappoint as few people as possible.  But he was grateful to see another friendly face, and Michele flashed him a smile.

“Nice to meet you Yuuri.  I’m guessing you’re a Seeker too?”

He nodded. “I hope.  No promises though.”

“Well I’d love to play against you sometime.  You came at a tough time, though. I heard there’s a lot of people trying out this year.  The last Seeker held the position from his second to seventh year so there’s a bunch of people trying to get their shot at it now that they’ve finally got a chance.”

Well wasn’t that great to hear.

“I’m sure you’ll do great, though!” Phichit added in. “You mentioned you had two classes with Ravenclaws yesterday, right? Did you see Michele’s sister Sara? She’s got long dark hair.”

“Er, I can’t recall,” he admitted. “I met a lot of new people yesterday.”

“True,” conceded Phichit, then his voice dropped to a whisper so only the three of them could hear. “Oh my God, did you have a class with Viktor?”

Yuuri would be lying if he said Viktor hadn’t been on his mind all morning.

“Why are you saying it like that?” he whispered. “But yeah, we’re partners in Potions, for the _whole_ _year."_

“Phichit loves to make everything dramatic,” Michele laughed. “But to be fair, I reckon anyone in their right mind would be freaking out.  Sara was his partner in Defense Against the Dark Arts our second year and she told me he crushed her in every duel. Wasn’t too fun for her but I’m sure it’d be nice when you’re working _with_ him.”

Yuuri allowed a smile, despite his flushed cheeks. “I’ve got Defense Against the Dark Arts next, either with Ravenclaws or Slytherins.”

“You must have it with Slytherins,” Phichit reasoned, “because we had it yesterday with the Ravenclaws.”

Yuuri’s stomach dropped, saved from a response as Professor Binns walked—or rather, floated—in the door.  He’d seen several ghosts back in Japan and a few in the Great Hall at Hogwarts, but he’d never been _taught_ by one before.

He wondered if the reason he was teaching was because he’d lived some of the experiences firsthand.  He even almost thought it might make the class more interesting until the professor opened his mouth and the most dreadfully boring voice filled the room.

He leaned back in his seat, seeing Michele do the same on the other side of Phichit.

It was going to be a long morning.

“Someone tell me when the largest goblin rebellions took place.  This should be review from last year.”

Yuuri almost missed the question thanks to his soporific tone.

 _Put your hand up,_ he begged himself.  He had never been the type of person to raise his hand in class, but he had also promised himself Hogwarts would be where he would start over, rebuild himself and become the person he’d always wanted to be.  He knew the answer, but—

“The seventeenth and eighteenth centuries,” called out Michele, sparing Yuuri from answering.

He wasn’t sure if he should be grateful or disappointed.  He settled back into his seat, thinking that any Gryffindor should be able to answer a question in front of twenty people.

***

True to Phichit’s logic, Yuuri was greeted with the sight of Viktor in the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom.  He was sitting at an empty desk in the front of the room, but backwards in his chair, talking to the two boys behind him.

A small blond boy who Yuuri didn’t remember from Potions was leaning across the aisle to talk to him, along with the sole Gryffindor in the friend group who Yuuri hadn’t yet learned the name of.

Then, to his surprise, Viktor’s eyes flickered up and met his.

“Yuuri,” he said with mild interest, “Georgi and Chris have left me sitting alone.  Come here.” He patted the seat next to him like he was doing him a favor.

Yuuri swallowed, left with no choice but to sit next to him.  He felt the gaze of half the Gryffindors on his back as he crossed the distance and took the empty seat.  It was quite clear to him that it wasn’t every day the awkward new kid—especially a Gryffindor at that—got invited to sit next to Viktor Nikiforov.

He was thankful that he at least wouldn’t have to speak to him; he thought he might throw up if he did.  Viktor was already back to his conversation with the rest of the Slytherin boys, and Yuuri focused his eyes into the wood of the desk.

“Ah, yes, Yuuri’s trying out for Seeker too.”

Yuuri gulped, deciding he might as well turn around in his chair.  He was met by the gaze of four Slytherins and a Gryffindor.

 _"What?!"_ spat out the blond boy.

“I forgot!  This is Yurio,” chirped Viktor, “the cousin I mentioned before.  He’s only in his third year but they let him take this class with the rest of us because he’s so good.”  He smiled down at the boy who was still glaring at Yuuri without saying a word.

“Er, well, nice to meet you Yurio,” he said, trying to stay calm.  It was pretty hard when Viktor Nikiforov’s cousin regarded him as the scum of the world.

“It’s _just Yuri,"_ he hissed back.

“No it’s not,” said the red-haired Gryffindor.

“Shut _up,_ Mila.”

She ignored him, instead giving a bright smile to Yuuri. “It’s good to see another Gryffindor here.  I’m used to being the odd one out. Oh, and I’m the other person trying out for Seeker, in case you were wondering.”

Great.

“Well good luck to us both then,” he stuttered, “and I didn’t mean to intrude, er, I just heard my name.”  He began to turn around again before Viktor placed a hand on his arm. Part of him wanted to never wash that arm again.

“No, no, Yuuri, you must have misunderstood.  Like Mila said, we could use another Gryffindor.”  He pointed to a dark haired Slytherin with blue eyeshadow and a distant look on his face. “That’s Georgi.”

“And I’m Christophe Giacometti,” spoke the taller blond boy who’d been studying him.  He had a deep voice and light green eyes. “Are you single by any chance? Because—”

“We were talking about Quidditch, right?”  Viktor shot Chris a venomous glare and Yuuri sank deeper into his seat.  He wasn’t quite sure why Professor Slughorn hadn’t started class yet but he was hoping it would be soon.

“Nice build, you have.  No surprise you’re trying out for Quidditch,” Chris continued as he examined Yuuri.  “You have good eyes, too.”

Yuuri swallowed, hard.  He was sure Chris had good intentions, yet he had never been looked at like _that_ before.

“Oh come on.” Viktor rolled his eyes.  “You’re making him uncomfortable.”

“My apologies, Yuuri,” Chris offered him a hand that Viktor knocked out of the air.

 _"Quidditch,"_ Viktor repeated.

Yurio let out a hacking cough.

“Yes, of course,” Mila continued smoothly.  “You’re new here, right? I haven’t seen you fly yet.  When did you start?”

If he hadn’t known better, it might’ve seemed like Mila was trying to size up her competition, but her blue eyes were earnest as she searched his face.

He was overly aware of the fact that Viktor was watching him, but the fact that the two weren’t alone made it much easier to talk.  Summoning whatever bravery was in him, he spoke as modestly as he could.

“I transferred from Mahoutokoro, the wizarding school in Japan.  My old dance instructor recommended I try flying, so I started the summer before and made the team as a first year.  We won the Championship two out of the three years I played,” he added shyly, “but I had a great team too.”

“Well that’s refreshing,” Yurio snapped, but his tightened brows relaxed a little. _"Vi_ _ktor_ is always bragging about his wins.”

“I am not!” exclaimed Viktor indignantly.  The rest of them laughed, and Yuuri forced himself to join in.

“Welcome everybody,” Professor Slughorn announced grandly, and Yuuri swivelled back to the front.  “This class, in my opinion, is the most important one could ever learn here at Hogwarts. I’m pleased to see so many familiar faces.  Nikiforov.” He felt Viktor smile next to him. “Giacometti,” he added jovially. “Ah, and even little Plisetsky.”

Yuuri could feel the Gryffindors’ moods drop at the acknowledgement of three Slytherins.

“Oh ho! A new student as well, Katsudon, is it?” he squinted at the page, ignoring the laughs of half the class.

“Yes, sir.  But it’s Katsuki, actually.  Sir,” Yuuri gulped.

Professor Slughorn seemed to find this amusing as he peered down at him. “Well I’m sure you’ll be calling me Horace in a few weeks time.  Any friend of Nikiforov’s is a friend of mine.”

Yuuri felt his face flush again, about to correct him, but Viktor shot him a triumphant glance that shut him up immediately.  He wasn’t exactly sure when they had become _friends._

“Alright,” Professor Slughorn continued absentmindedly. “Otabek Altin and Katsuki, you’ll be partners.  I thought I’d put the two new students together,” he smiled to himself like it was genius. “Nikiforov, I’ve put you with Miss Babicheva but _only if you two can work together._ We’re not repeating last year, and I mean it.”

As he read off the rest of the names, Yuuri searched the room, and realized the stoic boy who’d been with him the first night must be Otabek.  It seemed the boy had figured it out too as he made his way towards him, taking Viktor’s empty seat.

“Otabek,” he said, offering no other introduction.

“Right, erm, Yuuri,” he replied, not daring to say anything else.

Professor Slughorn covered the details of their first assignment which comprised of reading a chapter and taking notes, then practicing the pronunciation of the spells.  When Yuuri turned back to Otabek, he was watching him curiously.

“I saw you in Transfiguration and Charms yesterday,” Otabek said. “I thought I’d offer a sort of truce.  Neither of us know anyone in Ravenclaw, so instead of searching for a partner every day, how about we go with each other?  Not as friends, obviously, but to save ourselves from the embarrassment.”

He felt a wave of relief wash over him.  Leo and Guang Hong were inseparable, and it was clear Mila was the most popular girl in their year.  It would’ve been nice to have a good friend in Gryffindor, but Yuuri accepted the truce gratefully.

“It’s a deal,” he said, and just like that, Otabek dove back into the textbook, starting to read.

By the time class was over, Yuuri had forgotten Viktor was behind him and had several pages of quality notes for the essay on werewolves due on Friday.

***

Phichit was convinced Professor Trelawney was a goddess on Earth.

“You…you will find joy…” she paused, letting a few seconds pass, hand still pointed at the Hufflepuff, “in new life.”

Ignoring the laughs, Phichit grinned, then nudged Yuuri.

“I reckon it’s a sign, don’t you?  I’ll have to visit the Headmaster and get him to bend the rules so I can get a hamster,” he said. “And if he doesn’t, then he’ll be denying me of joy.  And then I’ll write to the Minister… ”

“Right,” Yuuri hid his smile as Professor Trelawney whirled around again, mouth open wide.

“The girl with the red hair,” she trembled, and Mila straightened up in her seat, eyes shining eagerly.  “I had a Sight last night, and—”

In an instant, she burst into tears and everyone leaned further forward in anticipation.  That was, except Phichit, who looked ready to make her a cup of tea and weave her a handkerchief out of gold.

“Yes?” Mila beamed impatiently.

“It is you who will suffer a quick but painful death this year.”

Everyone settled back into their seats unconcerned, as if this was a normal occurrence in Divination.

Yuuri was starting to wonder what type of school Hogwarts was.

“Okay,” Mila said, “do you know more specifically when?  Because I’d like to plan ahead. You see, my crush _still_ hasn’t asked me out and—”

The rest of the room burst out laughing.  Only Professor Trelawney and Phichit kept the horrified looks on their faces.  Even Yuuri was beginning to lighten up. She _had_ to be joking.  Maybe it was her way of getting the class’s attention on the first day.

“All I can see is that it is this year.  Do not take your downfall lightly,” she said in a low voice.  The Gryffindors looked bored already and the rest of the students were chattering with each other.

She removed her thick glasses for a second, wiping them on her robes before putting them on again and glancing at Yuuri.  His stomach dropped.

“Please open your textbooks to page fourteen.  We’ll start this year with a unit on crystal balls.  Red hair, start us off.”

Yuuri relaxed ever so slightly.

“I’m afraid I can’t,” Mila said, voice hushed in a dramatic whisper. “It’s strange, I’ve got the worst feeling that if I have to read, I might, you know...” She scanned the room with wide eyes, “die.”

A snicker spread among the students and it was exactly the reminder Yuuri needed that whatever Professor Trelawney would predict in the coming months was nonsense.

***

Yuuri’s second day had left him much more excited than the first.  After Divination had ended, he, Phichit, and Michele had walked to Herbology together.  They’d gotten off with no homework, only hands covered with dirt that were fixed with a spell yet still a lingering smell of radishes.

Now he stood in the middle of the massive Quidditch pitch with Phichit by his side, both admiring it.

“This is so much bigger than at Mahoutokoro,” Yuuri marveled. “We could’ve played three games at the same time on here.”

“Now that’s an idea to run by Madam Hooch,” Phichit contemplated.  “Should we just warm up today so you can get used to the field?”

“That’d be good,” Yuuri said. “I have a bad habit of over stressing before games or tryouts.  I want to take this one slowly. I don’t reckon there’s much I can do in two days to improve, so as long as I don’t worry too much about it, I’ll be fine.”

“Good call,” said Phichit. “I was talking to Leo earlier and apparently there are seven people trying out for Gryffindor Seeker.  The good news is the youngest trying out are fourth years, like us, so if you don’t make it and neither do Leo or Mila, you’ll still have a chance to try out again in a few years.”

 _"Seven?!"_  he squeaked. “The most I’ve tried out against was two or three.”  Suddenly the wind seemed very cold and his Nimbus 2001 too big in his gloved hand.  The pitch, although empty, was humming with an energy that couldn’t be contained.

“Don’t worry.”  Phichit patted his arm.  “I’m sure you’ll be fine.  You never know, you might surprise yourself.”

Yuuri could tell he was trying to console him, but it wasn’t working.  Maybe he should’ve practiced more over the summer. But at the same time, he knew there was nothing he could do to get better, at least on his own.  He thoroughly enjoyed flying by himself, even practicing. But when he was put in front of a crowd, it sometimes got the best of him.

Phichit had already mounted his broom, and Yuuri hurried to do the same.  The two shared a nod before kicking off.

Yuuri had never thought he’d like flying.  He had been the type of kid that was terrified of everything, but flying hadn’t made him fear falling.  Instead, being above everything made him feel fearless. At least when no one was watching, that was.

Sure he had come to Hogwarts to advance his studies, but Quidditch had also been a big factor.  And when he ascended into the air in record speed, leaving everyone else behind and staring down at the pitch with its glorious golden hoops and massive stands, he knew he had made the right decision.

Swooping down, the air on his face and the wind brushing his hair back, he felt more comfortable than he had since he’d arrived.  There was something about flying when no one was watching and there was no Snitch to catch or points to keep track of that was irreplaceable.

He forgot about everything else around him, twisting and turning until his muscles were sore and his fingers were frozen from the cold September air.

He lost himself.  The sky grew darker and darker but all he was aware of was the cool wood of his broom and the aching of his thighs.

When Yuuri finally landed, he was shivering like crazy and Phichit had already changed, sitting in the stands smiling at him.

“It’s already dusk,” he said getting up to join Yuuri as they walked back to the castle. “I was going to wait for you but it got cold, so I went to put my broom away.  When I got back you were still flying and you looked so mesmerized I didn’t want to interrupt you.”

Yuuri flushed. “Sorry.  I haven’t flown in a while, and who knows how much homework I’ll get tomorrow.  It might be the last time I get to practice before Thursday.” He grimaced. “You didn’t have to stay.”

“I didn’t,” Phichit offered his arm and Yuuri looped his around it, “but I did.  So when you conquer tryouts and everyone in Gryffindor is wishing they were you, you better mention how your friend was your biggest cheerleader.  And when I win my first match in November, I’ll tell everyone how my friend helped me too.”

Something warm inside of his heart threatened to explode.   _Friend._  Why had he doubted himself so much?  As long as he made the team on Thursday, he had nothing to worry about.

***

Yuuri woke up half past noon.  He was still wearing his socks from the previous night, and he’d forgotten to take off his glasses.  Luckily, he only had two classes that day, starting with double Arithmancy, and Astronomy later that night.

As he brushed his teeth in the bathroom which seemed much emptier without four other boys in it, he tried to figure out who would be in his classes.  He knew Leo and Guang Hong were both taking Care of Magical Creatures and Divination, so they wouldn’t be in Arithmancy. Phichit was taking Muggle Studies and Divination, and all he knew was that Viktor was taking Muggle Studies.

That struck him as a little odd, as Phichit too had pointed out.  But thankfully, he was having a much easier time picturing the sophisticated boy sitting in a grueling session of Ancient Runes rather than Arithmancy, so he sighed happily and spit out the minty toothpaste, satisfied as it swirled down the drain.

Grabbing just his Arithmancy textbook and a quill, not even bothering to bring his bag, Yuuri headed down what he hoped was the right hall. He hummed, looking out the grand window overlooking the bright blue lake as he turned the corner.

The humming stopped the moment his shoulder hit someone’s chest.

His textbook flew right out of his hands, but with some Quidditch reflex he managed to keep ahold of the quill and his own balance.

“Yuuri!” beamed Viktor.  “Where are you headed?”

“Sorry,” he mumbled, all confidence lost as he brushed his robes off with haste.

“Arithmancy,” the silver haired boy said, answering his own question.  He handed Yuuri’s dropped textbook to him. “Let’s walk together! You were going the wrong way, just so you know.”

“Oh.” Yuuri hurried to match Viktor’s pace.

“So did your old school have Arithmancy or are you jumping in now?” Viktor asked.

“Mahoutokoro offered similar electives to Hogwarts,” Yuuri explained.  “I took the equivalents to Arithmancy, Divination, and Ancient Runes there.”

“And how are the Hogwarts versions holding up, so far?” Viktor regarded him amusedly.

“Well I’m not taking Ancient Runes because I thought three electives might be a bit much in a new school,” Yuuri swallowed.  “But Divination is a little more, er, unconventional than in Japan.”

Viktor laughed.

“Erm,” Yuuri frowned.  “You’re not going to Arithmancy too, are you?”

“You sound surprised,” Viktor remarked, reaching a heavy wooden door and holding it open for him with his foot.

“Well, it’s a bit of  Muggle subject, isn’t it?” he edged with a strong desire to see how Viktor could counter that.  In fact he thought it was suspicious that Viktor was taking the two most Muggle-like electives that were offered.

The classroom was surprisingly cozy, with no more than twelve single desks, half of them already full.

“Well that’s why.  My parents didn’t bother hire a tutor to teach me,” Viktor yawned, pulling up a chair for Yuuri.  “So I taught myself, but I couldn’t learn everything with limited resources. And I’d much rather sit through a class that I haven’t learned much about rather than Ancient Runes or Divination.”

“Oh,” Yuuri said, humbled. “I didn’t realize you spent so much time on your studies.  I kind of thought, well, your career was already decided.” Something about hearing Viktor admit he hadn’t learned the contents of the class ten times over made him more confident.  Finally he might have the upper hand.

Viktor looked amused.

“Did you think I woke up every morning and played Quidditch until the sun set?” Viktor smirked.

“Sort of.” Yuuri looked up, a flash of delight running through him to see Viktor was smiling.

“Speaking of Quidditch, you have tryouts on Friday, right?”

His mood dampened.

“No, tomorrow.”

“Oh.” Viktor paused. “I promised Chris I’d go to his party tomorrow.  That’s probably why Yurio and Mila couldn’t make it. I thought they were avoiding it on purpose.  Which sort of made sense. For Yurio at least.”

“Oh,” repeated Yuuri awkwardly.  On the other hand, if Viktor had been there he might’ve been too focused on him to fly anyway.  He was starting to feel like if tryouts didn’t go according to plan the only person he’d have to blame would be himself.

Summoning his courage, he directed the topic away from Quidditch.

“Have you had Astronomy yet?  It’s my only class left. I’ve got it either with Ravenclaws or Slytherins.”

“We probably have it together,” Viktor said thoughtfully. “Tonight at eleven?”

“Right,” confirmed Yuuri with a slight pit of dread.  So that meant he had four classes with Viktor. Potions, Defense Against the Dark Arts, Arithmancy and Astronomy.  So four three-hour blocks throughout one week with his greatest inspiration who seemed to turn his knees to jelly every time he talked to him.

Yet as class started and Viktor asked him for help on a few problems, Yuuri felt his worries begin to ebb away.  It seemed that as long as he was the one teaching Viktor, rather than the way around, he felt much more comfortable.

“So what’s the Heart Number again?” Viktor had his head propped on his hand and he was gazing at Yuuri with large blue eyes.  “And how do you calculate it?”

“Well,” Yuuri gulped, forcing himself to look away and instead focus on Viktor’s paper in front of him.  “It’s the number that sort of represents what you don’t show other people. So it could be secrets or feelings you try to hide.  It’s the most insightful of the three, and you get it by adding up the corresponding numbers to the vowels in your name.”

“Thanks,” Viktor said, taking his paper back.

“Wait,” Yuuri noticed, “you had that question right in the first place.”

“Just wondering,” Viktor replied with a devious look on his face.  “You’re a great teacher by the way.”

He blushed, turning back to his own paper and focusing on the last problem.  He was a great teacher? What was _that_ supposed to mean?

“Yuuri,” he interrupted again. “What are the traits of someone with a seven Character Number like?”

“We’re not even learning that today,” Yuuri said suspiciously, sneaking a glance at the boy.

“I just want to get a head start.”  He glanced at Yuuri with innocent eyes.

“They often exceed in perception, especially in social situations.” Yuuri wracked his brain from last year.  “They’re typically hard working and bright, which leads them to sometimes be more arrogant and boastful than others.  Mysteries intrigue them which makes their imagination take over, so sometimes they need to be grounded in reality. However if—”

He stopped abruptly, realizing he’d said enough.  He didn’t want to sound like he was reciting from a textbook.

“If?” Viktor continued, eyebrows raised.

“Nothing,” Yuuri bit back. “You’ll learn the rest next class.”

“Next class?” Viktor asked with a smirk on his face. “I have to wait that long?  Can’t you tell me _more?_ ”  He leaned forward, almost out of his seat.

“No,” Yuuri sputtered. “I’ve got to work.”

“Of course.  Sorry.” As quickly as he’d snuck forward, Viktor settled back into his seat obediently and the two fell silent.

His heart was pounding fervently and he forced himself to focus back on the paper and ignore the chattering of the students around him.  Class. Quidditch. Friends. That’s all he had to worry about, and he already had a friend. Viktor was too much trouble and he didn’t need to waste his time with him.  All he had to do was make it through Astronomy and the day would be over.

***

True to his word, Otabek found Yuuri in Transfiguration and the two sat together, taking comfort in one another’s silence.  If it hadn’t been tryout day, he would’ve been able to focus on the lesson in front of him. Instead his thoughts wandered until Professor McGonagall called on him.

“Katsuki, remind the class when your essay is due,” she said, giving him a warning look.

His mind whirled but he was relieved to see he’d written it down on the bottom of his parchment in the midsts of his daydream.

“Next class, Monday,” he replied.

“Exactly.” She faced the whole class, her strict face not budging, “I am aware that Quidditch tryouts are tonight for all houses, but this is first hour and you have plenty of time to worry about that later.  Focus on the lesson or I’ll have to ask you to leave.”

He swallowed his embarrassment.  Had he been that obvious? But to his relief, it seemed he wasn’t the only one.  The girl he realized must be Michele’s twin sister, Sara, exchanged an uneasy look with Mila.  Otabek shifted next to him and he could’ve sworn he heard Leo’s quill drop onto his desk behind him.

“Good,” Professor McGonagall continued.  No one had uttered a word, but it seemed their expressions had been apologetic enough.  “Now who can read the next passage for me?”

Charms was just as miserable as Transfiguration, but Professor Flitwick was much more understanding, allowing them to spend the second half of the hour to study.

Mila even dared to ask if they could leave early to get in more practice, though it seemed that was where he drew the line, sputtering angrily at her.

(Although he had the subtle feeling that if a Ravenclaw had asked, the indignant professor would have been more than happy to comply.)

It seemed everyone at Hogwarts, even the teachers, took Quidditch very seriously.

A creeping feeling that his choice to not practice more had been a bad one was starting to take over.

***

“I had a dream last night that Professor Trelawney was forcing me to eat marmalade, otherwise she was going to lock me in a cage with an elephant.  It’s weird because I like elephants but I seemed really terrified of them at the time.” Phichit was lounged across two chairs at the table, paging through his Divination dream log.

“Hmm,” Yuuri mumbled.  “Sorry, what was that?”

“You’re thinking about tryouts, aren’t you?”

“Sorry,” he repeated. “I just feel like I should’ve practiced more.  I didn’t realize it would be this intense.  I keep forgetting how big of a thing Quidditch is here.”

Phichit straightened up instantly to comfort him.

“What do you say we push this Divination homework off until tonight and we can go practice? We’ve got fifty minutes left until our last class.”

Yuuri’s instinct was to refuse and insist they kept studying.  He didn’t want to inconvenience Phichit, but he reminded himself they were friends.  Friends.

“Okay,” he caved in, shutting his book.  “Let’s go.”

***

Potions wasn’t too bad, thanks to Viktor who did the work for him, again using some suspicious shortcuts.  Yuuri spent half the class with his head on his desk, pretending to watch the potion while Viktor busied himself with cutting the ingredients.

Yuuri left class with a sick stomach and a good luck from Viktor that somehow left him even more nervous.

***

His time spent alone in the common room while everyone else was at dinner left him a little more calm.  Whatever happened, it didn’t make him any less of a person.

Right?

The door opened and Yuuri straightened, grabbing the book nearest to him and flipping it open, pretending he was occupied.

“I didn’t know you were such a fan of Bathilda Bagshot,” noted Otabek, standing alone while the door behind him shut.

Yuuri winced.  It appeared he wasn’t fooling him.

“Her use of metaphors is impeccable,” he remarked, closing the textbook and throwing it onto his pillow.

“I’m assuming you’re going to tryouts.” Otabek crossed the room to stand in front of him.

“So are you,” Yuuri realized, noticing the broom in his hand.  “Please don’t tell me you want to be Seeker.” He was surprised they were even talking, but his observations of the other boy told him they were quite similar and he didn’t want him to be a competitor.

“Beater,” Otabek said in a surprised voice.  “I didn’t mark you as the Seeker type, though.”

“What’s that?” Yuuri glanced at him, surprised at how easy it was to have a conversation with someone he spent most of his time silent around.

“A confident jock. With a bit of arrogance too,” Otabek replied drily.  “I assumed it was part of the job description.”

Yuuri shrugged.  It was true: most Seekers had to be confident.  The fate of the game depended on them and they had to be strong enough to face that type of pressure.

“Guess I’m out of luck, then,” he said, meaning it to be a joke, but inadvertently letting his insecurity show through.

“Well I’ll be rooting for you,” Otabek said in hushed and steady tone.  “Forget yourself out there and I’m sure you’ll do fine.”

 _If only it was that easy._ But even as the two boys made their way down to the Quidditch pitch in silence, his words still echoed in his mind.

The sun was already starting to set, and Yuuri hoped he would be done flying by the time it was dark.  Unfortunately, it seemed half the school had shown up to watch. Yuuri tried his best to filter them out and instead made his way to the gathering of about fifteen people standing in Gryffindor robes in the center of the pitch.

In the middle was JJ, one of the youngest ever Quidditch Captains, shouting directions over the noise of the crowds.  As a few more people arrived, he signaled at Madam Hooch who blew her whistle, quieting everyone in an instant.

“Alright!  I’m sure most of you know the current Gryffindor team, but for the transfers or new students, I’ll introduce them.  I’m the first Beater and our three Chasers are Anya Kuznetsov, Emil Nekola, and Yuuko Kinuko.” Yuuri saw the pretty Japanese girl standing proudly next to a larger boy that he recognized with little effort.   _So transfers from Mahoutokoro have made the team before._

“And our Keeper is Takeshi Nishigori.”  The boy next to Yuuko smiled. “So that leaves one Beater position open, and also Seeker.  Seekers will be trying out first, so if you’re a Beater, head over there.” He pointed to a portion of the stands that had been sectioned off.

Phichit had been right, Yuuri realized with a pang.  There were six other people besides him left standing, Leo and Mila being the only fourth years.

“Right,” JJ continued. “Looks like that leaves seven of you so I’ll divide you into two groups.”  He paused before pointing to Yuuri, Leo, and a taller boy. “You three will be our first group, and the rest of you will be the second.  It’s pretty straightforward and we’re running tryouts like the years before. I’ll release the Snitch and the people who catch it first from each group will then face off.  Whoever catches it after that will be our new Seeker.”

 _No_ _second chan_ _ces,_ Yuuri realized with a jolt.  He couldn’t allow himself to get distracted.

“Mount your brooms.”

He swung his leg around his Nimbus 2001, gripping the wood with shaking hands.

A collective yell came from the crowd and he turned to look, surprised to see people of all houses cheering.  Except—

One look.

It was enough to turn his knees to jelly and for whatever confidence he’d been holding onto to disappear.

What was _he_ doing here?  Didn’t he have a party to be getting ready for?

Viktor Nikiforov was about to watch Yuuri fly, and he was falling apart.

“On three!” JJ yelled, ignoring the crowd. “One, two, _t_ _hree!"_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oo will he win? tune in next time to find out... ;)
> 
> 1\. i have been working on this story for AGES and it feels SO GOOD to finally have a fraction of it out!!! if you're curious, each of the 20 chapters is around 10,000 words so the final product is a little bit more than 200,000 words!  
> 2\. basically the story is going to cover four years and there will be five chapters per year (also all the chapter titles come from the lyrics of the song you are in love)  
> 3\. this is my first story on ao3—i'm a bit of a newbie to having an account on here lol (i spent years just anonymously reading stories but i finally caved)  
> 4\. please please please comment your thoughts & reactions!! i will love you if you do <3
> 
> preview (for next chapter): _untouchable / like a distant diamond sky / i'm reaching out and i just can't tell you why / i'm caught up in you_


	2. dark room

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _untouchable like a distant diamond sky / i'm reaching out and i just can't tell you why / i'm caught up in you_

****Yuuri pushed off with his leg and immediately shot into the air, his broomstick carrying him far above Leo and the other boy.  His plan was to scour the pitch from as high as possible so he would only have to look in one direction.

 _Could it be?_  But it was just a glint of the setting sun off the hoops and Yuuri risked a look at the crowd.  There was a mass of blue on one side and he wondered if they were all there to size up their competition.  There was no doubt Phichit was in the smaller crowd of yellow.

And then the Slytherins…Yuuri couldn’t recall how many Quidditch matches he had watched with Viktor being carried off by his team, the whole stadium screaming for France’s endless victories.  And now the boy himself was watching Yuuri fly.

Which, he remembered, he was doing a terrible job at.  He tried to focus on the air below him again, but the golden ball was nowhere to be seen.  It seemed Leo was having just as much of a hard time as he was, and the other boy was nowhere to be seen.

Was Viktor watching him right now?  Or maybe he was friends with the other two and wanted one of them to win.  If that was the case, how would he react if Yuuri did win?

He bit back his worries, deciding to take a risk and swoop closer to the ground.  At least he might have a better view of the Snitch then.

The audience had seemed to get a bit bored, probably expecting an immediate catch.  But as soon as the thought crossed his mind, someone pointed and a roar erupted from the crowd.

Yuuri spun around without even thinking about it.  His trained eyes spotted the Snitch glittering close to him, and surprisingly, it wasn’t in the hand of anyone.

With someone unknown reflex, he tilted the broom to a near ninety degree angle, gripping onto the wood with tight fingers.  The crowd seemed to love this, and he heard shouts even louder than before.

But faster than he could see, as his fingers were a second away from grasping victory, another broom jabbed into his side.  He was pushed away, one hand still outstretched as the two tumbled through the air.

Yuuri was now gripping onto his broom with one hand, falling quickly.  Putting every ounce of strength into his arm, he heaved himself back on, ten feet from the ground.  He could see the crowd in crystal clear now, and he swore for a second he met Viktor’s eyes.

He shook it off, although his hands were shaking as he ascended, and he wasn’t sure if it was from his plummet or something—someone—else.

The boy who’d stopped Yuuri from catching the Snitch was back on his broom as well, although it was clear the Snitch was lost once again.

Would a better player like Viktor have been able to catch it while Yuuri had lost it?  Maybe if he’d spent more time practicing over the summer he would’ve been able to too.

“Shut up and focus,” he mumbled at himself, circling around the hoops on the left of the field.

If there was anything he had learned from the near-victory, it was that the Snitch couldn’t be in the view of the audience otherwise they would be livid.  His next thought was that it was above, but Leo and the other boy were still searching with no luck.

What would Viktor do?  In order to be the youngest international Quidditch champion, his success had to be more than athleticism.

 _His brain,_ he realized.  He had to out-think the rest of the players.  As long as the crowd was quiet, the Snitch was out of their sight.  Right now Leo and the other boy were still circled above, close to the clouds.  If it was there, he’d have no chance.

He had to do what he hated most—take a risk.

Yuuri took an abrupt turn, swooping past the crowd so close he heard a girl let out a shriek.  He risked another look at Viktor, but all he saw was a blur of green. His foot nicked the metal rail as he swivelled around to look back in front of him.  He had to _focus._

He swept around behind the stands, now out of the pitch, trying to still his pounding heart.  What was Viktor thinking right now? That he was crazy or—

A glitter of gold caught his eye and he turned as fast as he could, but the elusive Snitch was already far ahead of him.

 _If only you hadn’t been thinking about Viktor,_  he scolded himself.  His eye caught its trail as it went under the stands.

He heard the woosh of a broom behind him.  With no time to waste, he flattened himself onto his broom as best he could and directed it under the stands.  Metal beams held the bleachers up and Yuuri steadied his broom. His breath hitched as he heard whoever was behind him hit one of them, followed by a yelp that sounded very much like Leo.

The crowd was going crazy above him, stomping on the metal so loud his head was pounding like crazy. He saw in fury, at the end of the stands in blinding light, the other boy waiting with a hand outstretched for the Snitch to come to him, not daring to enter.

Yuuri pushed forward faster, leaning so far forward on his broom that his hand barely had room to grip.  If only he could—

Joy spread through him and his fingers closed around the wing of the Snitch.  Half a second later, he pulled back as far as he could, but still barreled into the other boy waiting at the end.  The two fell onto the ground, broomsticks toppled on one another as Leo plummeted out of the stands as well. He dodged them in time, but still ended up on the ground, a foot away.

For a second, Yuuri couldn’t breathe.  Then he heard a shout from above, and he tilted his head up at the golden sky, seeing students pile on top of one another to see from the side of the bleachers.

Remembering the Snitch in his hand that was no longer fighting his grasp, he lifted it in the air in triumph.

“He got it! He got it!” yelled a Hufflepuff and in an instant JJ was over to them and then Yuuri was on his feet.  He offered a hand to the boy he’d collided into, who bitterly accepted it, standing as well and brushing off his robes.

He felt a pair of arms around him and was surprised to see it was Leo, with a streak of mud across his cheek.

“You did it, Yuuri!” he yelled, finally letting go as JJ gave him a pat on the shoulder.

“Congratulations.  I suggest you get a drink and rest before you have to face off with the winner of the next match.  You can go sit where I have the Beaters at the moment.” He raised a hand to point across the field.

“T-thanks,” Yuuri said, still in disbelief.  “Oh.” He let go of the Snitch with its crumpled wings that fluttered weakly as JJ took a hold of it.

The captain walked off with it to where Mila was standing among another girl and two boys, one a redhead like her.

It didn’t sink in until he had crossed the field, earning a cheer from everyone that only ended when he settled down next to Otabek, still breathing hard.

“Here.”  He handed Yuuri his empty water bottle.  "That was pretty impressive."

"Thanks," Yuuri said.  His mind was still catching up to everything that had happened.

The other two Beaters didn’t say a word, and after a quick _Augumenti,_  he settled into the seat to watch.

Seeing how close he had been to losing to Leo, he was torn.  He watched the rest of the competitors mount their brooms, preparing to take off.

Anyone _but_ Mila should be his logical choice, knowing if she was the winner and then proceeded to beat Yuuri as well, he wouldn’t be able to play for the rest of his time at Hogwarts.  If any of the others won, they’d graduate before him and he’d at least have another chance to try out.

But the girl had been so welcoming to him that day in Potions that he didn’t want to wish her ill, especially seeing how well liked she was among all houses.

“Hello,” said a voice dangerously close to his ear.

Yuuri choked on his water.  Without needing to look over, he recognized the voice to be Viktor’s.

“Why are you always where I least expect you to be?” Yuuri asked with surprising confidence.

“What do you mean?” Viktor shrugged. “It’s not like anyone’s going to kick me out.”

It was becoming very apparent that Viktor could get away with anything, thanks to his combination of charm, wit, and intelligence.

“Right,” he muttered, ignoring the question.

“You were great out there,” Viktor said.

He tried not to take it too personally.  It wasn’t like _Viktor Nikiforov_ was complimenting his flying.

“Thanks,” he said.

“It was interesting watching you fly.  I was a bit worried when you started out.  You seemed nervous, like your mind wasn’t wholly committed to the game.”

He was right.  He wondered if Viktor knew it was partly his fault.

“Then,” he continued, “missing the Snitch and being so close to winning seemed to do something to you.  It was like you became a different person and I reckon you took a lot of people by surprise.”

“Did I surprise you?” Yuuri blurted out.

“Yes.”

_What?_

“But you-you’re like king of surprising people,” he sputtered out.

“Hmm,” Viktor replied, “I hadn’t realized you had watched that many of my games.”

“Oh,” Yuuri said in defense, “I’ve just watched a lot of Quidditch.  The Quafflepunchers have been winning for the past few years so I’ve seen a lot of their games.”

“Right,” Viktor said in the same voice as before.

Yuuri glanced at him and saw his eyes were glued on the game.  He willed himself to watch as well, and noticed Mila was headed towards one of the hoops on the far side of the pitch.

She flattened herself, clinging to the broom, red hair streaming behind her in a short ponytail.  He couldn’t see too far, but the roar of the crowd said enough. She flew right through the hoop, coming out the other side with a hand held high in the sky, grinning from ear to ear.

It was very clear that the crowd loved her.  No one had been cheering _that_ loud for him.

“Gryffindor hasn’t had a female Seeker for a while,” Viktor murmured so quietly he almost missed it.

“Will you be mad if I win?” Yuuri wondered out loud.  “Do you reckon _they_ will?”  He gestured at the crowd which was still going crazy as she landed, handing the Snitch to JJ.

“Of course not,” Viktor assured him. “They just don’t know you yet.”

“You don’t know me either,” said Yuuri.  He wasn’t sure where all of his confidence was coming from, but it had to be a combination of nerves and terror.

Viktor raised his eyebrows and smiled, like he was contradicting what Yuuri had said.  Which was impossible. He knew nothing about him.

“Just do your best.  Surprise me.”

And with that, Yuuri set his jaw straight and stood up.

***

The first five minutes were a blur.  Yuuri had hoped the Snitch would be easier to catch once he’d already won one game because of his boosted confidence, but if anything, the added pressure made it harder.

Now everyone knew his name.  And if he didn’t win, he’d be known forever as _the boy who tried out for Quidditch and almost made it but didn’t._

He began to sweat profusely at the thought of losing and he maneuvered his broomstick towards the sky, rising high.

What had Viktor said?   _Surprise me._  That was how he’d won last time, so all he had to do was—

 _No._ Before he even realized what was happening, he tilted his broom down at such a steep angle he thought he might fall off.  But there was Mila, so much closer to the Snitch, only feet from the ground.

He squeezed his legs together in desperation, suddenly not caring about hitting the ground.  If only he could—

His fingers grasped around something but it was only Mila’s robes.  The two pulled up just in time before smashing into the turf and Mila stood victorious with the Snitch in her hand, still beating its wings furiously.

The stands exploded.

She turned to say something to him, but he grabbed his broom, offering her a congratulations before the rest of the stands reached them and rushed off as fast as he could.

“Yuuri!” He heard someone call out.  It could’ve been Phichit, maybe, or Viktor, or even Otabek, but he kept pushing through the people streaming towards them until he was far from the pitch.

Past the pumpkin patch.

Into the castle.

Up the stairs.

The castle was, as expected on the Thursday of Quidditch tryouts, empty.  Still, he hurried his pace until he reached an obscure hallway on the seventh floor holding only a tapestry that pictured eight trolls and a man trapped between them.  Pacing back and forth, he finally let his tears slip.

How had he ever thought he could fit in at Hogwarts?  He should’ve stayed in Japan where everything was safe and where he could see his family every weekend.

All he wanted was to be home again.  To feel his mother’s arms and see his old school with its polished floors and cozy classrooms.

He choked out another sob, abandoning all hopes of being secretive.

“Is someone there?” croaked an old voice. “Mrs. Norris what do you see?”

 _Filch,_ he realized with a start.  Phichit had mentioned the pesky Hogwarts caretaker and his cat, plus his obsession with finding students breaking rules.

Not that he was breaking any, but he didn’t exactly want to be caught crying in his Quidditch robes by anyone.

He stopped pacing, turning to see which way he was coming from.  As he swivelled around he noticed a door that he could’ve sworn wasn’t there before.

A much louder mew came from the right, and Yuuri didn’t hesitate, pulling himself into the abandoned classroom.

Except it wasn’t a classroom at all.

Instead it was the size of his small bedroom back at home.  In fact, it was exactly like his bedroom at home. How was it even possible?

His dark framed bed and white sheets, topped with the orange comforter he used during the winter.  His desk with a lamp and single houseplant. Even the various Viktor Nikiforov posters spread across the wall.

He marvelled at the sight of it.  There was no way he had accidentally arrived back home, unless there was some way of travelling that he didn’t know about.

But as he leaned against the door to listen, he could hear Filch muttering to himself.  He was still in the castle.

Perhaps Professor McGonagall had seen how lonely he’d been in class and had arranged for everything to be bought and shipped to the castle, he considered.

Yet she barely knew his name and, yep, Viktor’s signature on that limited edition Quiberon Quafflepunchers poster was exactly the same as the one at home.  The loop of the Os and the way his V drifted off into a perfect heart.

He’d almost forgotten why he’d been crying until he noticed the broomstick in his hand.  Puzzled, he opened his wardrobe where he usually stored his broom, and found a steaming cup of coffee and a plate of biscuits instead.

He let the Nimbus 2001 drop to the ground and took the food, settling onto his bed.

It would only be so long before tryouts ended and everyone would come back in, so he sat numbly, eating the biscuits one after another.

Finally when he’d demolished all six biscuits and couldn’t stomach anymore coffee, he set the empty plate and cup onto his desk.

He wished he had a watch, but his caution was lost the moment he picked up his pillow and gave a sniff.

It smelled exactly like home.  Any worry he’d had was lost. It wasn’t like the Gryffindors would miss him, so he slipped under the covers, basking in what he’d been longing for since he’d arrived in Scotland five days ago.

Exhausted, Yuuri fell into a heavy sleep.

***

Regardless of the fact that he’d had a five hour nap last evening, only woken by an alarm clock that had been set for fifteen minutes before curfew, then another eight hours of sleep, Yuuri was still exhausted by first hour.

He skipped breakfast, telling himself it was for the extra half hour of sleep, but also felt great relief knowing he wouldn’t have to face the Gryffindors who watched him yesterday.

Strategically, he entered History of Magic at the last moment possible to spare himself from too much conversation.

“You were great yesterday!” Phichit bubbled, pulling him over.

“It’s a shame you didn’t win,” Michele said.  “I would’ve liked to play against you. But like Phichit said, you were really good."

 _No I wasn’t,_ he thought to himself.  The only thing worse than failing and seeing people disappointed in him was the pity compliments.  But he didn’t want to fall into that hole, so he forced a small smile.

“Thanks guys.”

Phichit looked like he was going to say something else, but Professor Binns entered, his pale, bland complexion a welcome change from the bright faces around him.

If there was any teacher he could count on _not_ knowing a thing about the tryouts, it was Binns.

While the rest of the class was a bore, he was thankful for the silence and instead spent his time worrying about Defense Against the Dark Arts.

“Don’t forget to read section four before next class,” said Professor Binns with a hint more of emotion than the rest of his words, which was enough to jolt Yuuri back into focus.  He snuck a glance at the clock, startled to see only a few seconds left in class.

The moment the minute hand struck the ten, Gryffindors and Hufflepuffs jumped up with such energy Yuuri flinched, shoving the textbook he hadn’t even opened into his bag.

“Bye, Yuuri!” called Phichit.

He spared him a wave before rushing down three flights of stairs until he was on the second floor.

A wave of nausea passed through him as he entered the Defense Against the Dark Arts room, thankful he and Otabek were required to sit together.  He couldn’t even bear to  _look_ at any of Viktor’s friends.

He had heard Yurio had become the new Slytherin Seeker with ease, beating out the rest of the students in a matter of minutes, despite them all being years older.  Combined with Mila’s success and Viktor’s overall fame, he knew with a pang that he had no place among them.

He managed to avoid all their eyes, instead focusing on putting extra care into removing his textbook from his bag.

Yuuri risked a glance at the group, horrified to see Viktor’s gaze had landed on him.  He whirled around in his chair to face Otabek.

“Talk to me,” he said through gritted teeth and surprising ferocity.

Without blinking an eye, the other boy launched into a detail by detail retell of the Beater tryouts the night before.

Yuuri settled into his chair, trying very hard to focus on what Otabek was saying.  A minute in, he conveniently dropped his quill, turning to make sure that Viktor was no longer looking at him.

Thankfully, Professor Slughorn started class seconds before Otabek ran out of thrilling details on the exact make of his broomstick wood.

He gave him a grateful smile and said his congratulations on the other boy’s win.

“Please pass forward your werewolf essay,” Slughorn said jovially.

_Shit._

He’d been so caught up on tryouts for the past three days that he’d completely forgotten about the essay.  After a few panic-stricken seconds, he remembered the dream diary he was supposed to fill out for Divination later that day.

“Essay?” JJ asked in front of him, hand outstretched.

“Er, I forgot,” Yuuri squirmed.  It was the first time he’d seen the captain since tryouts and he wasn’t exactly giving off the best impression.

“‘Kay,” JJ shrugged, and Yuuri relaxed minimally.  At least he didn’t seem too bothered about that type of thing.

_Why does his opinion matter? Not like you’re playing with him, anyway._

Someone else’s opinion did matter, though, and for what felt like hundredth time since class had started, Yuuri dared another look Viktor.  He handed Slughorn a pile of essays with a bright smile.

If Viktor could not only balance school, a social life, and Quidditch at the same time, but exceed at all three, why couldn’t Yuuri?

***

Yuuri skipped lunch in order to catch up on the homework he had missed (and also to avoid the other students), no matter how much his stomach protested.

Then he was scolded by Professor Trelawney for having a ‘closed mind’, though he supposed if one professor were to insult him, he’d prefer it to be her.  There was no more talk of prophecies, or Mila’s coming death, leaving the class unentertained.

He had almost fallen asleep during Herbology when Professor Sprout announced they would be analyzing various types of dirt, and let Phichit and Michele do most of the work while he yawned his way through class.  He apologized at the end, but Phichit shushed him, telling it was alright.

He gulped down dinner to get back to the common room where he could catch up on the mass of homework he’d gotten.

There was a moment when he stared in the mirror, caught up in his own debate over skipping Astronomy for the sole reason that Viktor and the rest of his friends would be there.  A knock on the door made him bite his lip and think twice.

 _Be a Gryffindor,_ he told himself, and he took a large gulp before allowing JJ in the bathroom and walking to Astronomy with Leo and Guang Hong.

And there he was, wishing he could be focused on the night sky rather than petrified that Viktor would come talk to him.

His worst fear was confirmed right after Professor Sinistra announced they would have to stargaze for the rest of the hour for some sort of mindfulness activity.

As if he wanted to spend any more time trapped with his thoughts.

“Yuuri.  Come stargaze with me.”

He felt a tap on his shoulder, dreading every second it took to turn around to face Viktor.

Everything in him wanted to say no, that he was going to stay with the other Gryffindors, but he felt his feet move forward against his will.

He was relieved when Viktor led him past the rest of the Slytherins and Mila who were laying on the ground together, instead finding a spot alone.

After the minute of tense silence that Yuuri took to realize Viktor really meant stargazing, no talking, he blurted out the question that had been eating him away.

“Why were you at tryouts?”

Viktor’s eyebrows shot up.  It was apparent he hadn’t expected Yuuri to initiate a conversation.

“I got Chris to change his annual party to the mid-February around his birthday.  That way, Mila and Yurio wouldn’t have to miss it. And I was interested in seeing you fly.”

_Oh._

“I didn’t make it,” Yuuri swallowed.  “You should’ve gone to watch them instead.”

“It doesn’t matter if you won or not.  Anyone in their right mind would be able to tell you’re a talented Quidditch player.”

He almost stopped breathing.  Five days ago he’d seen his idol for the first time and now he was complimenting him?  Somehow it didn’t feel real.

“You don’t have to be nice to make me feel good about myself,” he bit back.  “I know I messed up.”

“Don’t sell yourself short.  If you had put your mind to it you would’ve won with ease.”

He wanted to scream back that it wasn’t that easy, that he had _tried,_ but he fell silent, eyes flickering up to meet Viktor’s.  They were deep blue in the dark, and he swore he could’ve seen the stars in them if he’d looked any longer.

“I’ll tell you what,” Viktor continued, much softer this time.  “I told you my parents never got a tutor to teach me Arithmancy or Muggle Studies.  The latter isn’t going so great. You’re a muggle born. So I’ll coach you at Quidditch and you can help me with Muggle Studies.”

His breath caught at the offer and he forced himself to look back at the stars.

“Why would you coach me?  It’s over. The position won’t be free until we graduate.”

“Because I saw something interesting happen,” Viktor said.  “It was like you alternated between two different people when you were flying.  You started out nervous, no doubt. Then something kicked in and you got the Snitch.  If I could help you always be in that state of mind, you would be able to always do well at Quidditch, even after you graduate.”  He paused, then asked again. “It’s a deal. I help you and you help me.”

Yuuri’s heart was pounding out of his chest, but he kept his eyes glued to the stars.  Nevermind the fact that he was only planning to play Quidditch for as long as he was at Hogwarts.  As long as he was helping Viktor too then he wouldn’t owe him a favor, right?

“Okay,” he allowed, and that was all there was to it.  They fell silent and stood there gazing at the dark abyss before them, not moving for a long, long, time.

***

The next few days passed in a blur.  Yuuri spent the majority of his first weekend at Hogwarts with Phichit who was showing him around the castle.  He learned of a small staircase that only appeared on Tuesdays, leading him from History of Magic to Defense Against the Dark Arts twice as fast as before.

On Monday, he discovered Viktor also had two free periods in the morning on Wednesdays, so the two agreed to spend the time focused on Muggle Studies at the library.

But as Wednesday came, Yuuri found a small crowd of students standing outside of the library.

Viktor beckoned him over.

“It seems Madam Pince has had enough with the crowded library.”  He pointed to the sign posted on the closed doors of the library.  “Only Prefects and Heads of houses can study in there. The rest of us can only go in to check out a book and leave.”

“That’s…” Yuuri swallowed,  “not good.”

_Obviously._

“Where are we going to study?” Viktor asked as they walked away aimlessly, turning down a hallway Yuuri had never been through before.

“Can’t we go to one of our common rooms?” Yuuri said.  He hadn’t seen any Gryffindors bring anyone from another house in yet but he didn’t see what was stopping them.

“Unfortunately not,” Viktor sighed like it was the worst inconvenience in the world.  “The founders wanted our common rooms to be like a second home. Since then it’s become taboo to invite the ‘enemy’ in.”

“Oh,” he said dumbly.  There was an awkward silence before he tried again.

“What about an empty classroom?”

“People only use those to hook up,” Viktor replied, kicking at a quill on the ground.  Sensing the tension, he hurried on. “Either way, it’d be hard to find one during school hours.  After classes are over there are some but they’re most likely full while we’ve got free periods.”

“Oh,” Yuuri repeated.

Viktor seemed at ease, but Yuuri was gripping his bag with white knuckles, focusing very hard on not tripping.  Why was talking to Viktor so _hard?_ Sure he wasn’t the best at conversing but with Phichit everything flowed.

Was it because Viktor was some Quidditch prodigy?

 _Oh._ Quidditch.  Memories of the night of the tryouts flowed back to him and he found himself suggesting something that made Viktor’s eyes light up.

***

“Are you sure it’s here?” Viktor asked, glancing down the corridor for the fifth time.

“I-I think so,” Yuuri answered, looking for some sort of proof.  “Yes! I remember that tapestry,” he announced, pointing at the green trolls brandishing their weapons, the man cowering below them.

Viktor looked at it, but no recognition passed through his face and he stared at it for a few seconds before turning to Yuuri again.

“It must be a magical room, only appearing at specific times.  What exactly were you doing at the time that you found it?”

“Erm.” Somehow saying he’d been crying his eyes out didn’t sound too appealing.

“I just came from tryouts.  I was holding my broomstick,” he suggested.

Viktor shook his head.

“It wouldn’t be that specific.  And you said it was your bedroom, and that’s got nothing to do with Quidditch.”

“Oh!” Yuuri gasped.  “Filch was there. And Mrs. Norris.  I wanted a place to hide, and when I looked up, it was there.  It did kind of appear out of nowhere, now that I think about it.”

“Hmm,” Viktor said for what had to be the twentieth time since they’d arrived, “I doubt Filch came up with it.  Again, it’s got nothing to do with cats. Let’s try to wish we had a place to study.”

He felt a bit stupid standing there and trying to yell at the blank wall in front of him to open up.  After twenty seconds of nothing, Viktor sighed.

“Was there anything else?  Were you tapping your fingers while you passed by.  Maybe humming? Did you run by here?”

“No, I was actually here for a while,” Yuuri admitted, “I was _—oh!”_  He saw Viktor’s eyes light up.

“I was pacing, back and forth.”

 _“Excellent,”_ grinned Viktor, grabbing his arm pulling him to his side so the two could pace in stride. “Make sure you keep what we want in mind.”

_A place to study, a place to study, a place to—_

Something changed in Yuuri’s peripheral vision and he looked up in delight, meeting Viktor’s eyes.

A door stood where there had once been nothing and Viktor strode forward to open it.

“I can’t believe I get to see what your bedroom in Japan looks like,” Viktor said.

“Wait!” Yuuri blurted out. _The posters—_

But it was too late—Viktor had opened the door, and he stood back, giving Yuuri a view of what was inside.

“This is your room?” he asked, his surprise apparent.

Yuuri summed up all the courage he had inside of him and took a look at the mysterious room.  His jaw dropped.

“No,” he responded.  He stepped tentatively inside to get a better view and heard the door shut behind him as Viktor joined him.

It was a dark room with no windows, only lit by candles that were floating quite like the ones in the Great Hall.  It was about the same size as his bedroom, and had a desk with two chairs facing one another. There was an alarm clock sitting by a stack of fresh parchment and two quills.

“Look,” Viktor said, pulling a book off of a large shelf, the last piece of furniture in the room.  

 _“Lumos."_   Yuuri raised his wand to read the cover.   _“Le souper de Beaucaire_ by Napoleon Bonaparte.”

“The Supper at Beaucaire,” Viktor translated, lighting his own wand and reading off the other books on the shelf.   _“The Old Regime and the Revolution, Fatal Purity, Reflections on the Revolution in France.”_

“They’re all on France,” Yuuri said. “What does that mean?”

“Yuuri,” Viktor breathed, placing _Le souper de Beaucaire_ back on the shelf. “We’re learning about the French Revolution in Muggle Studies.  It was what I intended to study today.”

“So the room…” he gaped at it, a desk perfect for two people to study, supplies to take notes, and a whole shelf of books for what they needed to learn.

“...gives you exactly what you need,” Viktor finished in awe. “I’ve never heard of anything like this.  Even my parents never mentioned it. I doubt many people know about it.”

Realization struck Yuuri.

“After tryouts,” he admitted.  “I was missing home. That was when I was pacing.  I must have wished I could be there again. I didn’t notice it had appeared until I needed a place to hide from Filch.”

“Incredible,” Viktor said, lifting one of the candles and gazing at it like it was a heavenly object.  “I wonder what else it could become, if you wanted it to.”

Suddenly an alarm trilled out and his eyes darted to the clock sitting on the desk.

“What time is it?” Viktor asked over the noise, finding the button and plunging them in silence again.

“It’s eleven-thirty,” he answered himself.  “Time for lunch.”

“So we won’t ever lose track of time,” Yuuri realized.

“Brilliant.”  Viktor turned back, the angles of his face cast in shadows.  “You might’ve stumbled on the greatest secret this castle holds.”

“We,” Yuuri corrected.  “I wouldn’t have thought twice if we hadn’t needed a place to study.”

“Yes,” Viktor smiled, setting down the candle.  “We.”

***

Wednesday passed with a breeze, and soon it was third period on Thursday where Yuuri and Phichit were on their way to the library.  Any awkwardness that remained from tryouts had dissipated, Phichit understanding the last thing Yuuri wanted to do was talk about it.

“How was your lunch?  That’s the first time I’ve dared to touch those tuna sandwiches, but _man_ they were _good,”_ Phichit sighed in content.

“Fine,” Yuuri grimaced. “Although Leo and Guang Hong weren’t there so it was a bit awkward.  Even when they are, I find myself leaving early.”

“Same,” said Phichit, “although I leave early because I don’t have enough time to finish my homework.”

“Is there always this much homework here?” asked Yuuri. “I mean there definitely wasn’t at Mahoutokoro but it might just be because we have O.W.L.s next year.”

“You’re right,” Phichit said dreadfully.  “That’s all the teachers go on about. I can’t imagine how terrible the load is going to be next year when we _actually_ have the O.W.L.s.”

Yuuri shuddered.  Then, his mood sank instantly, although it wasn’t at the thought of homework.

He’d completely forgotten that the library was selectively closed for students and he turned to make a face at Phichit.

“Where should we go to study instead?” he asked.

“Was it closed yesterday?” Phichit asked, curiosity edging into his voice.  “You were studying with Viktor, right?”

“We, er,” Yuuri swallowed.  He wanted the dark room they’d found to be something for them and _them_ only.  He was very aware that Viktor could be showing it to his friends at the moment, but something told him that the way the other boy had been in so awe of it, he felt the same as Yuuri.

“We wandered around until we found an empty corridor,” he lied.  “One where there aren’t a lot of classes. Then we just sat there and studied.  It was a bit distracting because people kept walking by, but it worked fine.”

If he could tell he was lying, Phichit didn’t say a word.  On the contrary, his eyes lit up.

“Oh, Yuuri!  You’re going to love this!”  He grabbed his hand and broke out into a jog, leading a very startled Yuuri down several flights of stairs.

“Where are we going?” he asked, finally dropping Phichit’s hand as he turned the corner to a dim lit hallway.  There was a large painting of a bowl of fruit at the end.

“Yuuri, meet some of my best friends!” he reached out, tickling the pear.  

He jumped back as it squealed, squirming around, knocking into the banana and twisting into a green doorknob.

“Phichit?!” he exclaimed, looking at the doorway in front of him.  It seemed he wasn’t the only person who had found a secret room.

He followed his friend in, expecting to see another small, empty room perfect for studying, but instead was greeted by many voices.

“Phichit is here!” croaked an older house elf sitting on the top of a table.  It was one of the five in the grand room, which Yuuri noticed was identical to the Great Hall except all the tables were empty.

Dozens of house elves were perched around the room, and Phichit was already waving and calling some by their names.

“Hokey,” Phichit’s face split into a grin as he came back to the elf that had announced his arrival.  “This is my friend, Yuuri.”

“Hi,” Yuuri said, still in marvel at the grand room.  The air was warm from the massive fireplace at the end.

Phichit gestured for him to sit down and began to explain.

“All the food you eat in the Great Hall is made by the elves here.  I found them in my first year with Michele when we got lost on our way back to the Hufflepuff common room.  We don’t come very often but we might start now that the library is closed. Besides, these guys are the best.”  He gestured around at the room to the house elves which were all looking up at Phichit in awe.

“Wow,” was all Yuuri was able to utter out, before, “why did you bring me here?”

“It was perfect,” Phichit smiled at him.  “You've got such a kind heart. I know you’ll all be friends in no time. And you were saying how you didn’t like to eat with your house sometimes, so I thought since we study right after lunch, we could come here instead and get more work done at the same time.”

It was perfect.  He wondered how many other secrets the castle held.  How many other creatures or people were living in the passages.  How many other magical rooms there were to discover.

“Thank you,” he whispered.  It was so rare for someone to actually listen to him and remember the things he said during pointless moments.  It was even more touching that Phichit was introducing him to something that had been only his for years.

“That’s what friends are for,” the boy said.  Then, his face twisted into a grimace and pulled out his History of Magic book.  “Now, I hate to kill the mood, but do you have any clue what the Giant Wars were about?”

***

“What do you mean you’re not flying with me?” Yuuri asked, standing in front of Viktor on the pitch.

“How would I be able to tell you what you’re doing wrong if I was busy flying?” the silver haired boy gave an infuriating smile.  His teeth were blinding.

It was already Saturday but it was clear any progress that had been made that Wednesday was gone.  Viktor was back to his perfect self, which was making Yuuri his very anxious self.

“So you’re just going to sit there while I fly and analyze my every move?” he gaped at him.  As if that was going to help him get any better.

“Whenever you’re ready,” Viktor waved a hand at him before sitting down on the bench closest to him.

“I really don’t think this is going to help.  I—”

A single look from Viktor shut him up.

“O-okay,” he swallowed, then mounted his broom ungracefully.

Was there even a way to mount a broom gracefully?  He wondered how Viktor mounted his broom. Did he swing his leg up or lower the broom then step over it?  Maybe a combination of both.

 _Shut up,_ he told himself and kicked off the turf before he lost any more confidence.

He tried to still his shaky hands and gave the pitch a long glance.  As expected, there was no sign of the Snitch anywhere. He assumed once he found it, the session would be over.  In that case, the sooner the better.

“Loosen up!” he heard Viktor call to him from below.  As soon as he took a calming breath to stop gripping the broom so hard, he started jittering again.

He decided to circle around the pitch.  At least he didn’t have to compete against someone.  Besides himself, that was.

“Yuuri,” sighed Viktor.  He looked down, letting his broom dip as well.  Beginner’s mistake.

“What?”

“Tell me what the job of the Seeker is.”

“Er,” he gulped. Was that a trick question? “To catch the Snitch, right?”

“Right.  So actually look for it instead of flying in a straight line.”

His face burned, as he gave him a stiff nod that Viktor could barely see and decided to head up higher.  Maybe he could pretend Viktor wasn’t there if he couldn’t see him clearly.

It worked.  Sort of.  After ten more minutes of endless searching, Yuuri noticed his thighs weren’t clenched anymore and his fingers had stopped shaking.  He took a few more deep breaths and shifted on his broom.

He had almost forgotten about Viktor, until he heard the other call his name.  He grimaced, tension flooding back into his body. There was no chance he’d find the Snitch now.

Slowing down, he flew back to the ground, unable to meet Viktor’s eyes.

“Come sit by me,” he said in a surprisingly soft voice.

Yuuri complied, playing with the bristles on his broom to avoid eye contact further.

“What’s wrong?”

How was he supposed to explain that there was nothing wrong and he was still terrible?  He considered playing it off like he wasn’t even a good Seeker, but he remembered he had told Viktor he had been Seeker at Mahoutokoro.

“It’s just an off day, sorry.”  The words tasted foreign and bitter in his mouth.  He still wasn’t looking at the other boy, but he could tell he wouldn’t believe him.

Instead of pressing, Viktor asked again.  “Do you know why you lost at tryouts?”

_Yes.  I got distracted by the pressure put upon me.  I lack the confidence needed to be a Seeker and you should stop wasting your time on me._

“No.”

“It’s strange,” Viktor continued.  “Because in the first game I was sure you wouldn’t win.  You were far too nervous and even though it was clear you were more talented than the other two.  But then you snapped into some mood and your movements became more determined. Like you were daring the others to beat you. Sometimes you’re unbeatable and sometimes you look like you couldn’t care less about the game.”

“I don’t know,” Yuuri muttered, now pretending to be entranced by a loose thread on his robes.  He almost scoffed. If he couldn’t fix himself even while he’d known what was wrong for years, he was sure Viktor wouldn’t be able to either.

“Don’t worry,” Viktor consoled.  “Give me some time and I’ll figure out how to coach you and soon enough you’ll be able to beat me.”

Viktor was believing his act, and it made Yuuri’s stomach sick.

Viktor patted his back awkwardly, then retracted his hand like it had never happened.

“That's enough for today,” he said.

“What about the Snitch?” Yuuri asked.

“What about the Snitch?” Viktor repeated, in a different tone.

“I mean, it’s still out there.”

“Oh.  Right,” he paused. “I’ll go get it with one of the school brooms.  You can head in, though.  It looks like others are coming to use the pitch.”

There was nothing more he wanted to see than for Viktor to fly, but he was right—a group of first year girls were coming closer, all holding school Cleansweep Sevens.  He headed off with a pang, glancing back as they giggled, approaching Viktor.

A big smile spread across Viktor’s face and he exchanged a few words before three of the girls simultaneously stuck their brooms out for him to take.  He laughed and grabbed one, then flew into the air with such grace it looked like he was flying his usual Firebolt.

Yuuri was halfway back to the castle, the figures at the pitch barely visible before he heard a cheer, only three minutes after he’d left.

He was getting coached by the boy who was regarded as the best Seeker in the world.  He had hoped his urge to impress his idol would have been great enough to bring out his confident side, but if anything, flying in front of him made everything ten times worse.

***

Despite his loss that Saturday and the tension between him and Viktor, Yuuri found himself looking forward to the rest of the week.  He was now finished with two weeks at Hogwarts and if nothing else, his forgotten assignment in Defense Against the Dark Arts had only made him more determined to succeed academically.  If only the same could be said for Quidditch.

Monday was one of his most relaxing days as it consisted of two classes in the morning where Professor McGonagall and Professor Flitwick kept him busy with work.  After that, he was able to unwind in the kitchen with the house elves and Phichit, and get most of his homework done with the bonus of delicious food.

The day ended with Potions, and all awkwardness diffused from the weekend.  Viktor was his cheerful self again as they finished their assigned potion halfway through class, leaving the rest of the time to study.

Although he would be lying if he hadn’t been distracted by Viktor the whole time.

Tuesday was a blur as well, and soon it was Wednesday and he was sitting in the dark room across from Viktor with a textbook on the French Revolution sat on the desk in front of them.

“Who was the queen at the time?”

“Marie Antoinette,” Viktor answered with ease as he fiddled with the quill.

“Why did the people dislike her?”

“She was from Austria, and France wasn’t on the best terms with them.  Oh, and she threw massive parties and wore expensive gowns while the peasants were suffering.”

“Right.  What percent of the population was peasants?”

“Er, like twenty, right?”

 _"What?"_ Yuuri blurted out.  “Viktor. You’ve gotten this right the past three times I asked.”

The same thing had been happening for the past two hours.  When Yuuri had started quizzing him, he’d gotten a few right with surprising accuracy, then his performance dropped immediately as he failed to get even the most basic questions right.  That had continued, Yuuri being as patient as he could, until now.

“Sorry,” Viktor sighed.  “Was it closer to sixty percent?”

“More like ninety-eight,” Yuuri muttered, then shut the book.  “Maybe we should take a break.”

“No, no.  I’ll try harder,” Viktor hurried.  “Keep asking me questions.”

Yuuri racked his brain, trying to think of something they hadn’t covered yet.

“Why are you taking a break from Quidditch?” he burst out before biting his lip.

Instead of laughing, or even refusing to answer, Viktor shrugged and sat back in his chair, eyes cast down.

“Sorry,” he said, too quickly.  “I was just curious. I didn’t mean to intrude.  We can go back to Muggle Studies.”

“It’s okay.”  Viktor shook his head.  “You can ask me anything.”

“Oh,” Yuuri replied and focused his stare to the flickering candles above them. “Are you going back next year?  To France, I mean? So that you can play for them again.”

“I always attended Hogwarts while playing for them.  I missed a lot of school for matches, but Floo Powder made transportation easier.  The captain always asked me to attend Beauxbatons so I could go to more practices and stuff.”  He shrugged. “I always said no, but she got annoyed when I wanted to take a year off. They haven’t been doing that well this year because they've been using a temporary replacement.  She said two years is all I get off, and if I don't return by then, they’ll hold tryouts and replace me for good this time.”

“Oh,” Yuuri repeated, dumbfounded.  If there was one thing he had misunderstood about Viktor, it was that he had a stressful life.  Before he’d arrived at Hogwarts, he thought the star spent all his time playing Quidditch and didn’t bother focus on school.  Why he would put time into education when he already had one of the highest paying jobs, Yuuri didn’t know.

“I don’t know what I’ll do,” continued Viktor.  “My parents want me to take placement exams that will allow me to graduate after my fifth year.”

Yuuri didn’t need to ask to tell that leaving Hogwarts was the last thing Viktor wanted to do.

***

It was hard to believe that it had been over two months ago that Yuuri had entered Hogwarts for the first time, truly alone.

The rest of September and October had passed quickly, and it was already the second week of November.

His and Phichit’s friendship had only grown stronger, especially during their study sessions in the kitchens where they would eat katsudon together (and almost always forget they were supposed to be studying).

His time spent with Viktor was a little more complicated, however.  He always found himself looking forward to Wednesday mornings and their time in the dark room, as hard as he tried to not get his hopes up.  They’d moved onto a new unit, but like Phichit, they often ended up talking about their personal lives.

He now knew about Viktor’s family in Russia and their long history in the Wizarding World.  He had to pretend to be surprised when he heard Viktor had a dog (not like he’d bought one of the same breed and named it after him).  He learned all the inside secrets of major league Quidditch and what it was like to play in front of hundreds and thousands of people. Viktor didn’t hesitate to tell him about the constant media attention from being the youngest Seeker to ever win an international Quidditch championship.

But despite how much he knew about Viktor, there was still something missing.  He shared the surface level things, but never told him how he felt and rarely expressed any emotion besides happiness and positivity.

Any progress they made towards becoming more vulnerable towards each other was erased on Saturdays, their weekly practices  Viktor insisted he kept playing for him, even if it took him forever to find the Snitch and he left every practice mortified, sure he would be unable to face him again in class.

Yet he always felt himself warm up again, Viktor pulling him right back after they drifted apart.  In addition, he was a lifesaver in Potions, always ensuring they finished early and had time left to study.

Defense Against the Dark Arts had become one of his favorite classes as Viktor, Chris, Georgi, Mila, and even Yurio, would crowd around his and Otabek’s desk and talk until class started.  He’d never seen Otabek or Yurio talk that much, and everyone seemed pleased at their unlikely friendship.

Sometimes Slughorn would even join in too, happy to see his favorite students getting along.

“You’re coming to the Quidditch match this Sunday, right?” Yurio demanded that Friday.  A thousand emotions flashed through Yuuri’s head.

“I’ve got a lot of homework to do,” he shrugged.  “I’m not sure if I’ll be able to make it.”

“Oh come on,” Chris said. “Yurio and Mila are facing off.  Wouldn’t you love to see that? And even Otabek will be there.”

“He’s right,” Viktor sighed with a dreamy look on his face.  “There’s only six matches each year.  You can’t miss a single one.  Even though I was travelling in and out last year, I tried my best to get to as many as I could.   The whole school turns up for them, even the teachers.”

“I don’t really like crowds,” he cringed.  “And I’ve already pushed off enough Transfiguration homework.  Midterms are coming up, too. I think Phichit got a camera too, so I could always get him to record it for me.”

“Midterms aren’t until the end of January,” scoffed Georgi.  “You’ve still got three months.”

“I’ll tell Minerva to extend the due date for you.”  Viktor rolled his eyes. “And watching it back isn’t nearly as good as it is live.  I’ve seen many Quidditch games in my life and there’s nothing more special than being in the middle of the crowd and feeling the energy it gives off.”

Yuuri could imagine it would be pretty special, but he ignored him, not wanting to admit it.

“Hey,” Yuuri easily deflected.  “Professor McGonagall’s one of the most serious teachers here! I’ve been doing my work perfectly and she still won’t crack a smile at me.  How are you on first name basis?”

The rest of the group with the exception of Otabek, who looked equally as curious, laughed like they knew something he didn’t.

“Just come to the match,” Viktor smiled.  Then added a wink.

Yuuri swooned.

***

“Yuuri!  Are you coming to the Quidditch match?” asked Phichit excitedly.  Well, as excited as someone could be while throwing a suspicious-smelling plant into a bucket.

His look said enough.

_“What?!"_

“You’re kidding, right?” Michele asked, shaking his head in disbelief and picking up his shovel again.

“You can’t miss a Hogwarts Quidditch match.”  Phichit rolled his eyes. “It’s probably, like, illegal or something.”

“I’ll go to the next one,” Yuuri said, with little intention to do so.  At least that would be Hufflepuff playing against Ravenclaw. He wasn’t sure he could handle seeing Mila playing where he could’ve been quite yet.  The match would be another reminder of his inability to get any better at Quidditch.

“You better,” Michele said.  “I’m facing off against my sister and I hate to admit she’s gotten a lot better this summer.”

“Consider it,” Phichit patted his arm, then brushed off the dirt he’d gotten on his robes with a grimace.

“I will,” promised Yuuri.

***

It was November 6th.  He didn’t go to the match.  Gryffindor ended up winning and Yurio ignored Mila for a week straight before he gave up and started talking to her again.  There was a glint of amusement in her eyes the whole time.

***

It was November 26th.  He had just come back from the Hufflepuff versus Ravenclaw game, a little disappointed that Ravenclaw won, although proud of Phichit for scoring five times.  If anything, his and Michele’s loss made them more determined to spend more time practicing. Yuuri went to watch one of the practices. His fingers itched to be around a broom again.

***

It was November 29th, a Wednesday, and Yuuri’s fifteenth birthday.  He was too terrified to bring it up to Viktor during their free periods, or even during Arithmancy.

He didn’t want to sound like he was begging for attention.

So he spent in the Gryffindor common room writing an essay for History of Magic while Phichit and Michele were busy practicing.

He kept waiting for a letter from his parents, his sister, _anyone._ Nothing came.

It was November 29th and Katsuki Yuuri spent his birthday alone.

***

It was December 1st and the letter finally arrived during breakfast.  He read the first line and nearly burst into tears at the sight of his mother’s handwriting.  He left the Great Hall quickly as he had come.

***

It was December 2nd and Yuuri was strolling alongside Phichit and Michele in Hogsmeade, snow whirling down around the trio.  It was more than he’d ever seen back in Japan, and because most of the Christmases he’d spent at home were green, the snow felt rather festive.

Unsurprisingly, every shop was full with people, mostly students who were grateful to get out of the castle for the first time that year.  Others were desperate to get holiday gifts for their family, as the next Hogsmeade trip would be Christmas weekend, when most students would already have gone home for break.

As much as it had been great to hear from his mother, he had been a little hurt to hear that the rest of his family had planned a three week trip to Australia which started before he got out of school and ended after his break.

That left him with only one option—to stay at Hogwarts during Christmas.  He tried to look on the positive side (at least he’d have plenty of time to explore the castle filled with secrets), but the thought of being alone on his favorite holiday was enough to make his heart sink.

“Do you think I should get Chocolate Frogs or make a nice card for my mum?” pondered Phichit, glancing back at Honeydukes.

“A card,” Yuuri answered.  “It’s more meaningful. Mums like that type of thing.”

“Agreed,” Michele smiled. “Sara got me sweets last year and they were gone by the end of the day.”

“Hey!” said Phichit. “Let’s go in The Three Broomsticks!  You’ll love it, Yuuri.”

“Butterbeer would be pretty good right now,” Michele complied and the three boys headed into the stone pub bustling with life.

“Do they have Butterbeer back in Japan?” Phichit asked as he craned his head to try and find an empty table.

“No, but I’ve heard—”

“Katsudon, get over here!”

Yuuri whirled around, spotting Yurio and Otabek sat at a table in the back which had been pushed against another that seated Viktor, Mila, Chris, and Georgi.

“Katsudon?” Phichit asked questionably, but followed Yuuri over to them.

“It’s his nickname for me,” Yuuri admitted, his cheeks flushed.  “Slughorn called me that on the first day and he still hasn’t forgotten it.”

Phichit and Michele knew of Viktor, Mila, Chris, and Georgi thanks to having classes with them every year, but they hadn’t known Otabek or Yurio until Yuuri had brought them up the other day.  It was still unknown to all three of them how he’d somehow become friends with the most popular people in the grade.

“This is Phichit,” he introduced his friend in front of the group, “and Michele.”

“Hufflepuffs, huh?” Yurio asked, eyeing them both down warily. “Well I guess it’d be rude to not offer you a seat.”

“That was still kind of rude,” Chris remarked off-handedly.

“I’ve seen you around,” Mila smiled at them both, then fixed her blue eyes on Michele.  “Your sister’s really hot.”

“Oh,” he said with a start.

There was a tense moment before he spoke again, this time defensively.

“She’s only fifteen.”

Mila waved her hand like she was dismissing the thought and turned back to Georgi.

“You’re already fifteen?” Yuuri asked.  He’d always been one of the older students.  “When’s your birthday?”

“September 13th,” he said.  “When’s yours?”

Yuuri winced.

“Er, November 29th,” he blurted out.

“November 29th?” Yurio asked, breaking off conversation with Otabek, looking personally offended.

He gave a weak nod, horrified to see the whole table staring at him.

“Katsuki Yuuri,” Phichit said in a dangerous voice.  “That was last week, wasn’t it?”

“It was Wednesday,” he managed out and downed his drink.

“Wednesday?” Mila asked. “We had Astronomy together.  You could’ve said something.”

“Sorry?” he offered, eyes darting back and forth.

Chris was the first to react positively, lifting his drink up with a gallant smile.

“Cheers, and a happy late birthday to Yuuri.”

He shot him a grateful look as even Phichit and Michele raised their imaginary drinks and pretended to clink them at the middle of the two tables.

“To Yuuri,” they all murmured, and his heart was almost ready to burst, until he noticed.

There was only one person who was silent.

***

“Yuuri.”  He felt a hand on his shoulder and stopped to see Viktor standing behind him as the rest of the group headed up to the castle.

The silver haired boy jutted a slim finger behind him towards the frozen lake and the rocks surrounding it.

“We need to talk.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so they found the room of requirement! imagine the things they can do now.....jk you're going to have to wait a while for that sorry #slowburn
> 
> 1\. YOU GUYS ARE THE BEST!!! i can't believe this many people have read my fic??? the comments are so sweet and i'm so so so happy people are enjoying it!!  
> 2\. i mentioned i might do a saturday posting schedule but that might have to be moved to sunday now (sorry) i'm pretty busy at the moment w/ my permit test and a job interview tmrw (wish me luck?)  
> 3\. anyway seriously THANK YOU to anyone who comments or leaves a kudo or just reads this! love you lots <3
> 
> preview: _and i know you heard about me / so hey, let's be friends / i'm dying to see how this one ends / grab your passport and my hand_


	3. meant just for you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _and i know you heard about me / so hey, let's be friends / i'm dying to see how this one ends / grab your passport and my hand_

****The lake was glistening silver in the sunlight, crevices of ice blinding.  Yuuri squinted past it and turned to the sky. It had stopped snowing as soon as they had left Hogsmeade, and now it was a light blue with streaks of white, black tailed gulls spotting the sky.

Finally, he looked back at Viktor who was staring at the rocks they were sitting on.  For the first time, he seemed subdued, unsure of himself.

“Everytime I come here,” said Viktor, “I’m reminded of St. Petersburg where I heard the seagulls in the early morning.  I never thought I’d leave that city, so I never used to notice the seagulls’ cries. Do you ever have times like that?”

It was odd, hearing Viktor ask him a question that was something more than _How was your day?_

He wasn’t sure how to answer, so instead he said what he’d been wanting to tell him.

“One time, the Beater on my team in Mahoutokoro got into an accident.  I was pretty torn up with worry. I was in the hospital waiting room with this girl.  When she hugged me to comfort me, I shoved her away without thinking about it.”

Viktor was silent before asking.

“Wow, why?”

“I didn’t want her to think I was feeling unsettled.  I felt like she was intruding on my feelings or something, and I hated it.  But then I realized that my family never treated me like a weakling. They all had faith that I’d keep growing as a person and they never stepped over the line.”  He bit his lip, still staring at the glittering lake, even when spots grew in his vision.

“Yuuri, you’re not weak.  No one else thinks that, either,” Viktor paused.  “What do you want me to be to you? A father figure?”

“No.”

“A brother, then? A friend?”

“Mm,” he murmured.  A friend would be nice.

“Then your boyfriend I guess,” concluded Viktor in such a voice that Yuuri couldn’t tell if he was joking or not.

“No, no, no!”  He stood up, the moment already lost.  Viktor gazed back up at him with wide eyes.

“I want you to stay who you are, Viktor.  I’ve always looked up to you. I haven’t been practicing well because I didn’t want you to see my shortcomings.  It made me too distracted and I was unable to focus in front of you.”

He took a deep breath, a little relieved to see Viktor didn’t look surprised.  So he’d known all along, then.

“It’s like you act too...perfect,” he said in a smaller voice.  “That was already my perception of you when I came here, but it’s worse when I try to perform in front of you.  I don’t mind studying together because it’s me teaching you, and I feel like we’re even, but with Quidditch you outshine me too much.”

Viktor studied him, a finger on his chin.

“There’s nothing wrong with your physical skill.  The problem lies in your mentality. You need to become more confident in yourself and I haven’t figured out how to bring that out of you yet.”

“No one has,” he said, watching as Viktor stood up to join him.  Not that anyone besides himself had ever tried.

“I’m trying,” he said, eyes staring intensely into his.

A gull squawked beside them and Yuuri jumped back, gathering the sweets from Honeydukes in his arms.

“One last thing,” Viktor said.  “You don’t have to be afraid to tell me about yourself.  Like if it’s your birthday.”

“Alright,” Yuuri swallowed.  He wasn’t sure how, but he knew something had changed between them.  “I’ll see you in Potions on Monday.”

“Yes,” Viktor smiled.  “I’ll see you.”

 _When I open up,_ Yuuri thought, _he meets me where I am._

***

It was quite hard for Yuuri to focus when there was snow streaming down outside of the grand windows in the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom.  Despite it only being the first week of December, he found himself surrounded by festive decorations, and the snow only made him more excited for Christmas—although he wasn’t excited to be spending it alone.

“Are you headed back to Switzerland?” Mila hugged her legs, her head nestled between her knees and tilted towards Chris.

“Of course,” he said dreamily.  “I love Hogwarts but I couldn’t imagine spending Christmas any place else than home.  You’re going to Russia, right?”

“Obviously,” she grinned. “Yurio, Viktor, Georgi and I are all going together.”

“My parents insist on holding their annual dinner party for all their friends, colleagues and acquaintances again.  Which means the whole country is going to show up.” Viktor rolled his eyes. “So much for getting a break.”

“I’m dreading Christmas break solely because that means I have to go to Viktor’s party,” Yurio said, digging in his bag for his textbook.  “I despise his parents and everything they do.”

Yuuri would’ve been at least a little insulted if Yurio had said that about his family, although Viktor seemed to agree wholeheartedly.

“They’re incredibly stiff,” he nodded with a rare face of disgust, “I’d do anything to stay here at Hogwarts over break.”

“Oh come off it,” Mila said.  “Your mother is lovely.”

Even Chris let out a laugh at that.

“Don’t lie Mila.  She’s abysmal.”

“Where are you going for break?” Yurio turned to Otabek who had been listening to the conversation without saying a word alongside Yuuri.

“I’m going home to Kazakhstan,” he said.  “I haven’t seen my parents in a while.”

“And you, Yuuri?” Viktor gave him a smile.  “Back to Japan?”

“Er, no, actually,” he said, trying not to let his disappointment show through.  “My family planned a trip to Australia and they’re leaving before our break starts.”

 _“What?!”_ exclaimed Yurio.  “But it’s your first time living in a different country.  They can go to Australia any time.”

“Can’t you Floo powder over there?” asked Georgi.

Yuuri shrugged.  He had considered meeting his parents that way, but it seemed too risky.  If he messed up in the slightest, he could end up in the middle of a country he’d never been to before.

Plus the way the letter had been written, it seemed like a vacation for just his parents and sister.  He wasn’t sure when he’d been excluded from the family plans but he also didn’t want to intrude.

“It’s okay,” he lied.  “I’ll see them this summer and we write so often it feels like I barely left.  I don’t mind being away for a few more months and staying at Hogwarts over break should be fun.”

“But…” Yurio continued.  Yuuri was flattered to see him looking offended on his behalf.  “You’ll be alone. Unless one of your Hufflepuff friends is staying.”

“No.”  He shrugged, as if to show it was no big deal to him.  “They’re both heading home. But it’s okay, really. There’ll still be a few students at least—and the professors.”

Yurio looked like he wanted to argue more, but Slughorn entered the room and the conversation was dropped.

The snow kept falling.

***

“It’s a shame we’re spending our free periods in a room with no windows,” Viktor said wistfully, his face amber in the candlelight.

“Well, I doubt we’d get much work done if we were watching the snow,” Yuuri said.  He pulled a book off the stack in front of him. “But I’m sure we could ask the room and it would change.”

“It doesn’t snow much in Japan, does it?” Viktor asked him, shifting so his cheekbones were hidden in the shadows.

It happened every time they were together.  They would be talking about Muggle Studies or Quidditch, then Viktor would ask some question to get them off topic.  Before he knew it, they’d be discussing something completely different.

But Yuuri didn’t mind.  Especially since their talk a few days ago, he could tell Viktor was making an effort to be more human

“No.  Especially where I live, it’s rare to have a white Christmas.”

“You’ll have one here, though,” he conceded in a very inconclusive voice.

Yuuri nodded, afraid of where the conversation was turning.

“You don’t seem too happy about staying here over holiday break.”  He leaned forward. “Why don’t you come to Russia with me?”

“I—” Yuuri was speechless for a second.  His first thought was that there was no way he would fit in with Viktor’s family at all.

“Hmm?” Viktor asked, sitting back in his chair and crossing one of his legs over the other like he had closed the deal already.  To Yuuri’s surprise, he looked serious.

“I wouldn’t want to intrude on your family,” he said, choosing his words carefully.  “They haven’t seen you in a while and I wouldn’t want them to stress about having another guest in the home.  Plus I don’t mind staying here at Hogwarts. It won’t be as bad as it seems, I’m sure.”

“Trust me,” muttered Viktor.  “They couldn’t care less if I came home or not.  And for the record, I’m not an idiot. I can tell you’re upset your family is going somewhere without you and you have every right to be.  But if anyone can understand distant families, it’s me.”

Yuuri bit his lip.  He didn’t like the idea that Viktor might know him better than he initially thought.  First with his insecurity at Quidditch, then his distraught over the holidays. Viktor’s uncanny ability to hide his thoughts was a very a dangerous one.

His first instinct was to decline Viktor’s offer and steer him back on track, but he remembered the conversation they’d had before.  There was only so much Viktor could do to bring them closer. He had to open up as well. If that meant being vulnerable, he had to do so.

“It’s just weird,” he admitted.  “My parents have never been like this before.  They’ve always been supportive of everything I’ve wanted to do and helped me even when I didn’t need it.  I guess I assumed they’d be thrilled to have me come home like before.”

“I guess in a way I’ve gotten used to being ignored, whereas you…it’s odd that they’re being so distant out of nowhere.”  He took a breath. “I know you’ll spend your whole break overthinking everything if you have nothing better to do.”

Yuuri realized he was right with a heavy pang.  So much for having a fun break.

“So stay with me for a few days at least.  Maybe the first couple days of break, since that’s when the party is.  Then we can go back to Hogwarts and my parents won’t think too much of it.”

It was exactly what Yuuri had needed to hear.  He wouldn’t be asking too much of Viktor’s parents—he couldn’t see them being as dreadful as everyone else seemed to—and at the same time he’d be able to get out of the castle for a bit but come back and spend the holidays where he felt comfortable.

“Okay,” he said, and a look of surprise passed across Viktor’s face.

“Really?”

“I...yes,” Yuuri decided.  Viktor’s lips curled up ever so slightly.  “Really.”

***

Saturday was one of the warmest days in a long time, any traces of the week’s snow gone.  It might have been for this reason that Yuuri was feeling a bit downcast, or the fact that it was his first Quidditch lesson with Viktor since their talk by the lake.

He spent breakfast talking with Otabek, mostly about Quidditch as it was one of the many things they had in common.

“Are you not going to eat anything?” he asked dubiously, staring at Yuuri’s still full plate, twenty minutes into breakfast.

“I had some fruit,” he pointed at the small pile of cantaloupe in the middle of Gryffindor table that was otherwise untouched.

“Haven’t you been doing this for weeks?  Why are you so nervous?”

“I’m not,” Yuuri said, unsure of his answer even as he spoke.  “I guess I shouldn’t be, either. I just don’t know what he’ll have me do.  We’re probably trying something new today.”

“Well good luck,” Otabek said and helped himself to another waffle.

As soon as he finished breakfast, Yuuri made his way down to the Quidditch pitch, surprised at how empty it was.  The snow was gone, although it was still chilly and he wished he’d worn a thicker sweater under his robes. He spotted Viktor waving at him while standing underneath the giant hoops.

“Yuuri,” he greeted as he reached him, his breath coming out in short, frosty puffs.  “Today we’re going to relax a bit.”

“That sounds good,” he admitted, then glanced back at Viktor.  His gleaming Firebolt was perched in his gloved hand, each bristle completely straight and the wood a glossy cherry color.

Suddenly his Nimbus 2001 felt like a joke.

“I thought we could fly together with nothing to worry about,” he said, spinning the Firebolt around between his fingers offhandedly.

“No Snitch?” Yuuri asked, jolting out of it and looking back up.

“No Snitch,” he confirmed, then swung a leg around his broom, forcing Yuuri to copy him.  “We can just fly next to one another and talk. I reckon the first challenge you need to overcome is the new environment and the new people.  If you’re able to get comfortable flying with me in this pitch to the point where you forget you’re flying, then we can move on.”

They took off at the same time, and Viktor slowed his broom to match the Nimbus’s acceleration as they ascended to just below the clouds, then levelled out.

“I do tend to think about other people too much while I’m flying,” Yuuri admitted, adjusting his fingers as they moved forward.

“I thought so,” Viktor said. “Once you get comfortable flying with me we can invite some others to fly too.  Mila, Yurio, Otabek, your Hufflepuff friends too, if you’d like. I’m just not sure how I can get you used to flying with people who aren’t your friends.”

“I reckon I’ll be okay,” Yuuri admitted.  “I’m usually more, er, nervous, when I’m with friends because I know them well and then I get worried that they’ll judge me for whatever happens.  When I’m with strangers, I don’t even know them so if I mess up it won’t matter since I’ll probably only see them once or twice around the castle. Does that make sense?”

“Er, yeah,” Viktor said.

He looked completely lost.

“How do you do it, then?” Yuuri asked enviously.

“Do what?”

“Escape.  When you’re playing a match, how do you push your feelings aside and focus on the game?”

Viktor turned to give him an odd look as they swerved past the tops of the stands.

“I don’t know.  I’ve never really thought of it...it just happens automatically I suppose.”

“Oh,” Yuuri said with a pang.  So whatever his problem was, it wasn’t normal.

“It’s okay though,” Viktor hurried in, sensing his disappointment.  “We can work through it. You’ll be the best Seeker here by the time we graduate.”

“For what?” he asked, not wanting to dance around the topic any longer.  He glanced down at his fingers as he gathered his thoughts. He really should have brought thicker gloves. “Mila will always be the Seeker, I’ve blown my chance.”

“For a job of course,” Viktor said.  The tip of his nose was pink from the frigid air.

“A job,” Yuuri repeated.  Right. He’d almost forgotten that was what Viktor thought he was doing.

“I’m sure you could make a national team when you graduate.  Someone’s bound to retire in the next few years,” he said thoughtfully.  “England’s Seeker is getting pretty old…”

“Viktor.”  The name still felt foreign on his tongue.  “I’m not getting a job as a Quidditch player.”

“What do you mean?”  The surprise was clear in Viktor’s voice.

“I’m not _that_ good.”  He saw Viktor open his mouth so he hurried on before he could interrupt.  “Plus I’d like a more stable job, like at the Ministry or something.”

The horror on Viktor’s face was imminent.

“A desk job,” he said, as if testing out the words for the first time.  “I mean, wouldn’t you get bored? I couldn’t even _imagine—”_

“I don’t know,” Yuuri said a little defensively.  “Boring is good.”

They dropped the topic.

“Let’s go a little lower.  You look like you’re freezing,” Viktor dipped his broom, much to Yuuri’s relief.

“It’s much colder here in Scotland than it is in Japan.  That, or it’s just a particularly bad winter.”

“Oh I’m sure you’ll love it in St. Petersburg,” Viktor said with a grin.  That explained why he looked so comfortable even in the freezing weather.

Yuuri found himself smiling back, the tension from earlier forgotten.

“Do you know what we’ll be doing there?”

“It’s up to us,” Viktor grimaced.  “Well, besides the banquet Friday night.  My parents are big believers in tradition.  So we have to have tons of gatherings and parties every year.  As if they couldn’t get more obnoxious.”

“Right,” Yuuri swallowed.  He remembered the others talking about it in their last Defense Against the Dark Arts class.  “Is it in honor of anything?”

“Well I like to pretend it’s thrown for my birthday,” Viktor said, a touch of exasperation in his voice.  “But my parents seem to have forgotten I was born on Christmas Day. So no. It’s just them upholding their social status and hosting random parties to showcase their wealth.”

So Viktor’s birthday was on Christmas Day.  Now he had to get him something extra special.  Yuuri bit his lip, thinking furiously.

“They don’t know your birthday?” he asked finally.  “Didn’t your mum, er, give birth to you?”

“Well that was years ago,” Viktor said in a thin voice.  “Now they couldn’t care less.”

“I’m sorry,” Yuuri said.  There he had been, earlier that week complaining about one trip his parents wanted to take without him.

Viktor was silent.

***

It turned out Viktor’s idea of flying and talking with him had definitely worked.  He’d been so occupied making conversation that he only remembered a few times in the beginning that he was flying.  The slight progress made him excited for their next practice, a welcome change from the usual dread.

The week before break flew by, despite the professors busying them all with several feet of homework, insisting that when they came back two weeks later they would otherwise forget what they’d learned.

It was finally Wednesday.  By the end of the day, most students would be gone for the holidays.  The Gryffindor common room was already clearing out, and noticeably quieter than a couple hours ago.

Although Yuuri was leaving the next day with Viktor, he agreed to meet Phichit and Michele in the kitchens where they could exchange gifts before they left.

“Sorry I didn’t wrap them,” he apologized as he passed each of them a box of Bertie Botts Every Flavored Beans.

Both the boys were looking at him strangely.  Michele had a confused look, while Phichit’s was more of amusement.

“Did you plan this?” Michele asked dubiously, before reaching below the table and pulling out two more boxes.  “I practically bought them for all my friends. And my sister.”

“I swear I didn’t know,” Yuuri laughed, putting his hands up as a gesture of innocence.

Phichit was oddly silent, for once.

“Erm...” he started.  Then, without wasting any more time, he grabbed two packages next to him.  They were shaped awfully like, well…boxes of Bertie Botts Every Flavored Beans.

Yuuri used his wand to unwrap the packaging and as his suspicions were confirmed, the three boys doubled over.  One of the house elves (who happened to be sporting a knitted hat that looked suspiciously like Phichit’s handwork) poked his head out from the kitchens to make sure they were alright.

As soon as they calmed down, they opened one of Phichit’s boxes first and Yuuri swallowed in relief when he detected the yellow was definitely lemon, not rotten egg.

Just as Michele was spitting out an earwax flavored bean, Phichit reached into his bag and pulled out a thick envelope.

“I forgot something.  It isn’t really a present,” he said, “but it’s for you, Yuuri.”

Puzzled, he pulled it open and photographs of him and Viktor flying spewed out.

“They’re from when I begged you to let me watch your practice session a few days ago.  I had my camera along and I thought you would like them.”

Yuuri found himself stuck staring at one of the photos, their cloaks flying behind them so elegantly it looked like a scene from a movie.  Viktor was turning his head towards him with a laugh. As if he was back in the sky, a smile spread over his face.

“Thanks,” he murmured, paging through the rest with a hint of a blush on his cheeks.

The moment was ruined as soon as Michele let out a large cough and a dark red bean flew across the table.

“I can’t tell if that was cinnamon or earthworm, but either way it was absolutely _disgusting.”_

***

The common room was emptier than Yuuri had ever seen it.  All of the Gryffindors had left for the holidays already, except for two sixth year girls who were chatting by the fireplace and a first year boy who was scribbling down notes with a quill that looked ready to snap.

Yuuri had woken up far too late to make it to breakfast, so instead he spent the next two hours catching up on all the homework he really should’ve been doing during the extensive Quidditch practices and times spent tutoring Viktor.

As he was nearing the end of his essay on the ethics of Unforgivable Curses for Defense Against the Dark Arts, the two girls who must have gone through at least five games of chess, finally got up and left the common room.

Yuuri glanced at the clock sitting above the crackling fireplace, and decided to pack up and go to lunch, hoping someone he knew would be there.

His first clue that the whole castle was empty was the fact that the Fat Lady’s portrait was ajar, and she was fast asleep, letting anyone walk in or out without the password.

With the exception of one or two, the staircases were surprisingly still, and he made his way down to the Great Hall with no trouble, seeing only one student, the Ravenclaw Isabella on his way.

The Great Hall was an even stranger sight, the large tables gone and replaced by a smaller one seating around twenty people.  Nonetheless, the snow was still streaming from the ceiling and there was a large pine tree at the head of the hall where the professors usually ate.

He was relieved to see the only Slytherin there was Viktor, and he slid into the spot next to him.

There was a low buzz of conversation around the table and Viktor turned to him.

“I’m not keen on spending too much time at home, so I talked to Minerva and she said we could Floo powder out of here at five,” he said, delicately picking up a single pea with his spoon.

“Okay,” he agreed, putting a helping of mashed potatoes onto his plate. “Will we have dinner here or there?”

“Here, if that’s alright,” Viktor replied with a pained expression.  “Meals with my parents are just _dreadful._  Plus it’ll be late when we get there because of timezones.  They’ll likely have finished eating already.”

“Okay,” Yuuri repeated.  He couldn’t imagine what it was about Viktor’s parents that made him not even want to eat a meal with them, but he decided that whatever it was, he would be finding out soon enough.

***

Yuuri was really quite pleased with the amount of school work he’d gotten through by the time he was standing in Professor McGonagall’s office, stuffed full from the dinner he’d eaten of roast potatoes and cranberry glazed ham.

“Do you want to go first?” Viktor asked, handing him a sprinkle of Floo powder and directing him towards the fireplace, leaving him with little choice.

“Sure,” he said, although he would rather do anything than show up at Viktor’s house alone, even if it was just for a second.

“Say Nikiforov Manor,” he said with a false tone and slumped shoulders.  Clearly, Yuuri was not the only one dreading the arrival.

Manor.  Of course.  Foolishly, he had almost forgotten exactly what he was getting himself into.  It was no secret Viktor’s parents were well known in the Wizarding World. Even the riches Viktor must have gotten from his first year flying for the Quafflepunchers could be enough for Yuuri’s family to live on for years.

“Nikiforov Manor,” he said, and stepped into the fire before he could stop himself.  Everything twisted around him for a dragged out second and there was a blur of green, then brown, and—

His feet hit the ground and he grabbed the mantelpiece above him to avoid falling over.  As everything fell into focus, he stared dumbstruck at the room in front of him. It was half the size of the Great Hall: to simply put it, enormous.  There was a table that seated twelve people, the chairs decorated with ornate backs of gold that were probably worth more than Yuuri’s whole house.

In the seats at the heads of the table, as far apart as possible, were two tall, silver-haired people, both staring at Yuuri.  He removed his hand from the white mantle with a start, wincing when he saw the ashy imprint left behind.

Hoping to break the silence, he turned back to them apologetically and opened his mouth before there was a loud _whoosh_ and Viktor appeared next to him.

“Viktor,” said his mother in an unwavering voice.  “We’ve been waiting for you to start dinner. You didn’t mention you would be this late.”

Yuuri’s stomach sank as he saw the silver platters across the table, perhaps a larger feast than the one he’d just had at Hogwarts.

“We already ate,” Viktor replied.  “Yuuri and I are actually pretty tired so we were going to head off to bed.  Right, Yuuri?”

“Er, yeah,” he agreed quickly.

“Nonsense.  He looks like he could eat some more.  Sit down.” She waved her wand and two seats slid out from the table.

“You can’t say things like that, Mother,” Viktor bit back with a strained tone, but crossed the room nevertheless.

Yes, Yuuri decided as he neared closer to the chair, it was definitely worth more than his house.  Maybe even twice as much.

“I can say what I want, Viktor,” she replied calmly, then waved her wand.

Yuuri was starting to get a taste of why Viktor didn’t want to be alone at home.

A scrawny looking house elf apparated into the dining room with a loud crack that made Yuuri jump in his seat.

“Lord, Lady Nikiforov,” he said in a sallow voice, dipping his head towards them each.  “Sir,” he added, noticing Viktor.

He ignored Yuuri completely.

“Tonight we have an appetizer of Spinach and Goat Cheese Tartlets and two main courses of Cherry Balsamic Pork Loin and Artichoke Mushroom Lasagna.  And lastly, Okroshka Soup.” He pulled the covers off of each of the platters, revealing a dark green soup last. “Dessert will be available upon request.”

The elf snapped his fingers and a portion of each meal appeared on the silver plates in front of them each, before he disapparated away with another crack.

Yuuri felt faintly like throwing up, but he forced himself to take a bite of the lasagna.

It was rich with flavor, and he began to push his food around on his plate, sure he wouldn’t be able to take another bite.

The meal dragged on, time ticking by ever so slowly.

Finally, just when Yuuri thought his eyelids were about to drop, Lord Nikiforov stood up, his plate empty.

“Ekaterina,” he said, looking only at Viktor’s mother.  “I must be off to bed immediately. Tomorrow will be a long day.”

“Us too,” Viktor said grabbing Yuuri’s arm and pulling him up, although they both still had plates full of food.

She gave them a look, exchanged a few words in Russian with Lord Nikiforov, all before sighing.

“Very well.”

Viktor didn’t let go of his arm until they were out of the dining room where he blew out a long breath of air.

“Sorry about that,” he muttered, directing him to a large staircase with a railing that looked too expensive to touch.

“It’s okay,” Yuuri said quickly, “You parents are very, er, interesting.”

“We’ll have to have breakfast with my mother tomorrow, but my father should be gone already,” Viktor said, leading him down a hall lit by torches floating off the walls.  It left an eerie shroud of darkness down the center, but after they passed only a few more doors, Viktor drew to a stop.

“This’ll be your room.  If you need anything you can ring the bell on your nightstand and a house elf will come.”  He bit his lip before continuing in a lower voice, “Tomorrow will be more fun. I promise. We can get out of the house and spend the day downtown.”

“It’s fine,” Yuuri lied.  “Dinner wasn’t that bad.”

Viktor just gave him a knowing look before turning and heading back the way he had come.

Gulping, Yuuri opened the door.  Immediately, fire flared up from torches around the room, giving it an orange glow.

The first thing he noticed was the four poster bed that resembled the ones in the Gryffindor common room.   The ceilings were high and a chandelier hung above, spreading light across the room.

A small table was accompanied by two armchairs with blankets draped so carefully on their backs that it made Yuuri wonder when the last time someone had stayed in the room was.  Finally was a stone fireplace near the chairs, and while it was crackling, the room felt far from home.

After standing by the door for a few minutes, Yuuri willed himself to move, cringing as his shoes sunk into the thick carpet on his way to the door that led to a bathroom.

The bathroom was dark as well, mahogany wood lining the cabinets.  There was a flower pot that held a dark green plant which looked like it hadn’t been tended to in years perched on the edge of the marble bathtub with clawfeet.

He met his own eyes in the large mirror, skipping past the adorned gold frame and studying his blue glasses and unruly hair.  His black sweater seemed out of place in the manor full of delicate treasures and large rooms.

There was too much empty space in the Victorian manor, leaving an unsettling feel.  Suddenly it didn’t seem too hard to understand why Viktor would rather stay at Hogwarts than see his family again.

***

 _Crack!_ Yuuri woke with a start, scrambling up to a sitting position, his legs swamped by thick, rose-colored blankets.

“Sooty has been instructed to tell Sir Viktor’s guest that breakfast will be served in fifteen minutes in the breakfast hall,” he said, bowing so low that his nose touched the carpet.

“Er,” he yawned, “th—”

The elf disappeared without another word and Yuuri squinted around at the room.  The large window overlooking the garden covered in snow let sunlight streaming in.  Suddenly, the room didn’t feel as closed off as the night before.

He rolled out of the bed, his feet plunging into the carpet as he trudged towards the bathroom, still wincing at the bright sun.

Ten minutes later, after he’d thrown on a dark grey sweater, he heard a knock at the door and hurried to put his shoes back on before opening it to Viktor.

The light shining on his face illuminated his thin nose and his eyes were a clear blue.  He was dressed in Muggle clothes—expensive ones no doubt—as well, and they framed his tall body well, a welcome change from the school robes and green tie.

“Are you ready?” he asked, any trace of his darker mood from the night before gone.

The two boys made their way down the hall that seemed considerably brighter thanks to the light from the window at the end opposite from the double marble staircase.  They took the right stairs, Yuuri putting his focus towards not tripping.

“Like I mentioned,” Viktor said in a low voice, stopping before a pillar, “my dear mother will be at breakfast.  As long as you use a bunch of manners and sit up straight she shouldn’t even notice you.”

“Okay,” he replied, nerves edging back in as Viktor led him around the corner to a room which was a little smaller than the dining hall he’d eaten dinner in.  This time there were large windows, which did wonders towards making the room a little more welcoming.

To Yuuri’s relief, the platters were already revealed and instead of a fancy quiche or hazelnut and blackberry waffles, there was a stack of steaming pancakes and a bowl of fruit.  He’d never been more excited to see normal food.

Lady Nikiforov had already started eating, and she gestured for them both to sit.

“Viktor,” she said, fixing Yuuri with a piercing her stare, her eyes just as blue as her son’s.  “You never introduced me.”

“Yes I did.  Didn’t you get my letter?” he asked, then continued once he saw his mother’s expression of confusion.  “Of course you didn’t,” he muttered. “This is Yuuri.”

“Like your cousin,” she remarked.

“No,” Viktor said through gritted teeth.  "He’s Japanese.  It’s different.”

“It’s fine,” Yuuri said quickly.

“Which of your other friends are coming to the ball tonight, again?” she asked with a delicately raised eyebrow.

“Georgi Popovich, Mila Babicheva and Christophe Giacometti,” he said stiffly.  "As usual.”

“Ah, the Babichevas.”  He allowed a small smile across her pale lips.  “They’re always lovely guests. The Giacomettis on the other hand…”  She tapped the tablecloth with her thin finger, a snake ring curling around it.

“They’re lovely guests as well,” Viktor spit out with surprising venom.

“Right.  Our Swiss friends,” she said in a voice that sounded far from agreeable.  “Anyways. I trust you have your dress robes for tonight ready? Both of you, that is?”

_Erm…_

Viktor was quick to respond, cutting into Yuuri’s panic.

“Of course,” he replied smoothly.  “Yuuri’s going to borrow some of my old robes.  Which we should probably sort out as soon as possible since we need plenty of time to prepare for the ball.”

Lady Nikiforov’s eyes cut into Viktor as he stood up and Yuuri quickly followed his lead, wistfully looking down at the half-eaten pancake still warm on his plate.

She gave him a shallow nod and they left as quickly as they’d come in.

“I’m really sorry she’s like that,” Viktor ran his hand through his hair as they made their way up the staircase and turned to the left.  When Yuuri got a good look at his face, it was etched in worry.

“It’s okay, really.  It’s nice to get out of the castle either way,” he said with an urge to make Viktor feel better.

To his surprise, his smile brightened as they stopped in front of a wooden paneled door at the end of the hallway.

“This will make your day better,” he said with conviction and he opened the door to a room even larger than Yuuri’s.

It was more modern and much brighter; the ceiling, walls, fireplace, bedsheets and armchairs all white, light brown pillows speckled around.  The brightness made it more welcoming than Yuuri’s room, although it was still shocking that he spent the whole of summer vacation in the room. After all, there was no trace that someone was living there—no posters, no personalized decorations, or even wrinkles in the sheets.

Then Yuuri’s eyes fell on the rug at the far end of the room, and the mop of brown fur that jumped up from it.

“Come here Makkachin!” Viktor called out, kneeling down, his eyes lighting up as the poodle barreled towards him, pink tongue out.

“Hi there!” Yuuri couldn’t help but smile as the dog pushed him over and licked his face repeatedly.

“This is my best friend,” Viktor grinned, pulling Makkachin off of him and burying his face into his fur.

(It took twenty minutes for them to finally detach from Makkachin and make it to Viktor’s closet to pick out his dress robes.)

***

Unfortunately, Viktor broke the news that they had to leave Makkachin at home because it would be too cold for the old dog, but they walked down the snowy, bustling street cheerfully nonetheless.

Yuuri was wrapped up in a big coat, and still couldn’t feel his fingers, so he was relieved once they reached a round building and stepped inside.

“You’re back,” grumbled an old man sitting behind a desk.

“And I’ve brought a friend this time,” Viktor replied happily.

“Yakov Feltsman,” he said, holding out a gloved hand that Yuuri shook.

“I’m Yuuri,” he chattered, his hand pink from the cold.

“There’s a lesson going on in there,” Yakov said, pointing his thumb back at the door, “but you can go to the outside rink.  It should be empty.”

Yuuri wasn’t too keen on going outside again but he followed Viktor out the backdoor nevertheless.

There was a clearing of ice, and they trudged through the snow until they reached the edge of the ice where there were two pairs of skates.

“I used to skate when I was younger,” Viktor smiled.  “I ended up quitting because I had to focus on Quidditch, but I still love to come back every so often.”

“I’ve never skated,” Yuuri admitted as he started to tie the laces with frozen hands.

“Don’t worry.  I won’t let you fall.”  Viktor even dared to wink at him and Yuuri turned back to the skates, thankful that his face was already red from the cold.

He stood up, his right hand shooting out to grab Viktor’s arm to stop himself from falling.

“Sorry,” he blushed, but Viktor took both his hands in return and pulled him forward, earning a yelp from Yuuri.

“Viktor!” he shrieked as he glided forward, feet shaking underneath him.

“Okay, okay,” he laughed, flashing his blinding teeth as he let go of one of Yuuri’s hands and swung around so he was next to him.

They moved together, one step at a time, and Yuuri couldn’t lose the smile stuck on his face.

“I didn’t realize how much I missed skating,” Viktor said as they made their first loop around.

“Hmm?” asked Yuuri, still focused intensely on moving his feet forward.

“The seagulls,” he replied slowly.  “The ones here in St. Petersburg. I always thought I would go to Koldovstoretz, the Russian wizarding school.  But then my parents heard about the Quidditch program at Hogwarts and enrolled me there instead.”

“Wow,” sighed Yuuri.  “It was hard enough for me to leave Japan this year.  I can’t imagine leaving everything behind when you were only eleven.”

“Twelve,” Viktor corrected him.  “Koldovstoretz starts students a year later.  By the time my parents realized they wanted me to go to Hogwarts, it was too late, so I had to start when I was a year older than everyone.”

“It wasn’t hard to fit in though, was it?” Yuuri asked, now being able to glide a bit instead of lifting his feet.

“I was lucky that I made friends quickly.  Once I started trying out for national teams in my second year, everyone suddenly wanted to be my friend.  It made it easier to call Scotland home. When I came back after my first year, I didn’t realize how many things I missed about Russia.”

“I suppose it’ll be the same when I go back to Japan for the summer,” Yuuri said.  He hadn’t considered what it would be like, but like Viktor, Hogwarts was more of a home to him than the quaint house in Japan now.

“Exactly.  I was surprised to hear people speaking my language and seeing the birds I used to watch every morning.  I took everything in and promised myself to remember it. Then when I went back to Hogwarts for my second year, I missed everything about Russia.  It’s the same with skating. My parents weren’t too happy I was getting so good at a Muggle sport, so they made sure I spent all my time on Quidditch instead.”

Viktor pulled to a stop, then turned to face him.

“But you know, once I lost skating I craved for everything about it.  So I know I’ll remember today forever.”

***

“Viktor, answer the door, would you?”

Yuuri followed him to the grand double doors, where he spotted a familiar blond boy.

“Katsudon?” Yurio asked, stepping in the foyer and throwing his coat on a hook like he was home, revealing his dress robes with a tiger print bow tie.

An older man, presumably their grandfather stood beside Yurio, carrying a package.

“Yeah,” Yuuri smiled.  “I’ve been staying with Viktor but we’re going back to Hogwarts tomorrow.”

“Hmph,” he said, then his eyes lit up in realization.  “How are you getting along with Mrs. Borington and Mr. Pale?”

“Erm,” he replied, shooting a glance at Viktor who was taking the package from their grandfather with a smile.

He was saved from an answer as the door opened again and Mila and Georgi burst in, their parents behind them.

Yuuri’s head was spinning by the time the rest of the guests had arrived.  The only one missing was Chris, and it seemed Lady Nikiforov was reaching the end of her patience.

She waved her wand with a flourish and led the guests towards a room with a table that fit around forty people.  Yuuri briefly wondered how many rooms they had dedicated to purely eating, then decided he would rather not know the answer.

Lord Nikiforov was already seated at the head, and Viktor ushered the three of them to seats in the middle of the table, far as possible from either of his parents at the ends.

After an elaborate speech on tradition and the holidays, when the collective grumbling of stomachs reached a high, the food was finally revealed and Yuuri dug in with relief.

“We’re not late, are we?”  A dark-haired man had entered, and next to him was Chris dressed in a deep emerald suit.

“Not at all,” Lady Nikiforov gave them a thin-lipped smile, and Yuuri saw Mila bite her lip to avoid a smile of her own.

“Excellent,” chirped Chris in his deep voice and grabbed the seat next to Yuuri.

Ravished from the long day, Yuuri scarfed down his food at a surprising rate.  Although they’d only been apart for a few days, he found himself catching up with the others like it’d been years.

“Then he asked me out, like I hadn’t just seen him for the first time in my life.  So I told him I was dating Georgi,” Mila told them, her blue eyes wide, waving her hands wildly.

“And then,” grimaced Georgi, “he didn’t believe her.”

“So _then,"_ she grinned, the candles behind her glinting on her scarlet hair and flushed cheeks, “I kissed him right in the middle of that Muggle store.”

“That was when her mom found us in the aisle,” Georgi sighed.  “And she just asked me five minutes ago if we’re dating.”

“And three minutes ago she asked me the same,” Mila said, clearly amused.  “Little does she know the love of my life is back at Hogwarts.”

Yurio spit out his pumpkin juice, staining the white tablecloth, earning a laugh from them all.

Lady Nikiforov looked mortified.  Seconds later, the stain spread inwards and disappeared.

" _Please._ Do you even know if she likes girls?”

Yuuri realized they must be talking about Sara, recalling the strange interaction between Michele and Mila at Hogsmeade.

“I’m working on it,” she said with a pout, although her face was still bright and eyes earnest.  “Do you know what she said to me the other day? I couldn’t _believe_ it…”

***

As dinner came to an end, they were ushered into a grand hall, snow whirling down from the ceiling and white powder dusting the ground, crunching under each step.  It reminded Yuuri of Hogwarts and a funny feeling emerged in his chest. How was it that after only two days away he was missing the castle? Mahoutokoro had never felt like home to him.

 _“Wow,”_ Georgi’s jaw dropped.  He was standing on his tiptoes and craning his neck, although he was easily as tall as most of the people in the room.

“What?” Viktor asked, glancing around as the soft music started and the wizards and witches moved into pairs, sweeping around the hall, their robes and dresses flying behind them as they twirled.

“Who’s that?” he pointed across the room where a brown-haired girl in a silver dress stood alone near the drinks table, red lipstick accenting her lips.

“I haven’t got the faintest clue,” Viktor shrugged.  “My parents know too many people.”

“She’s either a fifth or sixth year.  She’s Gryffindor though, right?” Chris asked.

“Her name’s Anya.  She’s a fifth year.  We share a dorm and we’re on the same Quidditch team,” Mila said, she too on her tiptoes despite wearing five-inch emerald heels.  “You also have had _many_ classes with her over the years, might I mention.”

By the time she finished, Georgi had already disappeared.

“Maybe my mum will stop pestering me about when we’re getting married now,” she remarked, then turned to Yurio. “Wanna dance?”

His lips turned into a face of disgust but after he glanced around to make sure no one was watching he shrugged and was led off immediately.

Now Yuuri was left standing with Viktor and Chris, unsure of what to say.

“Let’s dance, Yuuri,” Chris offered with a charming wink and before he could reply, he’d grabbed his hand.

“Don’t worry.  I’ll let you have him for the rest of the night after a dance or two,” Chris shot a glance back at Viktor who looked very conflicted.  He avoided Yuuri’s eyes.

“Oh!” Yuuri gasped as Chris pulled him onto the dance floor.

For a minute they just danced, perhaps a little closer than Yuuri would have liked, although he didn’t mind too much.  As the song shifted to something quieter, and there was just the sound of chatter in the background, Chris initiated the conversation in a low voice.

“Viktor looks happy,” he said.

“He does?” Yuuri replied, his voice shooting up at the end.  “Every time his parents say something he looks like he wants to disappear.”

“Trust me,” Chris said, lifting his arm, his charcoal sleeve trailing behind as Yuuri twirled around, thankful that he’d taken dance lessons for years. “He’s always been miserable at home.  He seems much better this year.”

“Oh,” Yuuri said, unsure of how to reply.

“It’s nice of you to stay with him.  It’s clear he appreciates it. You know that, right?”

“He was the one who offered,” Yuuri said hastily.  “I reckon he felt bad that I couldn’t go home and spend Christmas in Japan or see my family.”

“Well isn’t that lovely,” Chris remarked with a smile.  “It seems neither of you wanted to be alone and you found a way to spend the holiday together.”

“Are you-are you _mad?”_ Yuuri asked, unsure of the Swiss boy's genuineness.

“Mad? Why would I be mad?” he asked and Yuuri let out a miniscule sigh of relief.

“I don’t know,” he said uncomfortably.  “Maybe because I’m the new student who came into your friend group and I don’t fit in like the rest of you.”

“Hmm?” Chris prompted as the music built into a gentle piano piece.

“I mean, you’re all confident and well, charming,” he said, unsure of how else to put it.  “The whole school likes you all.”

“I’m glad to see you think I’m charming,” Chris replied, narrowing his golden green eyes seductively.  “But really.” He leaned forward and dipped Yuuri. “I believe you’ll find that you’re more likeable than you think.”

Without another word, he left, his cloak swirling behind him as he made his way towards another boy, one with long brown hair.

Yuuri slipped off the dance floor in a daze.  He spotted Georgi and the mystery Gryffindor girl—what had Mila said her name was?—dancing on the far side of the hall.  Mila was drinking a glass of firewhiskey and chatting with Lady Nikiforov, Yurio sulking near the desserts table by himself, a plate of half-eaten macarons.

Yuuri made his decision and headed towards Yurio who greeted him with a look only a little less than a glare.

“How was your dance with Chris?” he asked, swallowing a cream macaron in one bite.

“Er,” he said, still at a loss for words.  “Interesting. It was interesting.”

“Sounds about right,” he shrugged, then offered his plate to Yuuri.  “Macaron?”

***

Yuuri woke from a pleasant dream, eyelids fluttering several times before he squinted at the large window in his room.  The snow outside was reflecting the blinding sun, so he turned away, burying his face in his pillow for a few seconds before sitting up, pushing the heavy covers off and putting his glasses on.

He heard a knock and mumbled something unintelligible.

“Hello,” Viktor burst in, Makkachin bounding in before he could reply.

“Hey!” he grinned as the poodle jumped onto the bed, greeting him with a wet lick.

What a way to be woken up.

“He really likes you,” Viktor smiled.  “It’s a shame I have to leave him for another six months.”

“When are we leaving?” Yuuri asked, catching his reflection from the mirror in the bathroom and patting his hair down.  Makkachin pressed against his leg, curling up next to him as he stroked the dog fondly.

“As soon as possible,” Viktor said, although he still sat down on the bed and scratched Makkachin under the chin.

Yuuri’s heart melted.

“Okay,” he said, forgetting what he’d even asked.

“I’ll leave you some time to get ready.”  It could’ve been Yuuri’s imagination, but his voice sounded thicker, quieter.  “Meet you downstairs?”

***

Ten minutes later, dressed back in his Hogwarts robes and his wand in his pocket, Yuuri made his way to where Viktor was waiting for him.

“We have to go through the parlor,” Viktor told him and Yuuri could tell from his tone that his parents were waiting in there.

He considered what Chris had told him last night, about how miserable Viktor was at home.  He thought it had been bad enough for the past two days, but thinking about how lonely Viktor would be with no one else around made him involuntarily shudder.

Lord and Lady Nikiforov were standing in the parlor, which was surprisingly bright compared to the rest of the house, lined with dark wooden floors and white sitting chairs accented with gold.  There was a marble fireplace close to them and a white cauldron full of Floo powder.

“You’re leaving already,” remarked Lord Nikiforov, although he looked and sounded like he couldn’t care less.

“That’s right,” Viktor said stiffly, straightening his posture as he turned to face them.  Yuuri found himself doing the same, feeling more out of place than ever in the manor full of perfect rooms and proper people.

“It was nice to meet you,” he continued, directing his piercing gaze at Yuuri.

He felt every part of him being scrutinized.

“Thank you.  I appreciate you letting me stay,” he said, shrinking back against the fireplace.

“It was a pleasure,” he said in a voice that suggested he’d rather eat slugs than have a muggle born foreign boy staying in his house.

“It’s nice to see Viktor is making some new friends,” Lady Nikiforov spoke in her cool voice.

“I hope you are focusing on your studies, however,” Viktor’s father said disdainfully.  “Do remember you don’t need to spend so much time fooling around with your friends.”

“Of course,” Viktor replied, his voice as detached as his parents.  “But forming connections with people my age is important.”

“Right.  With important families.  Anything else is unnecessary,” he shot back, and Yuuri sank even further down.  He didn’t dare risk a look at Viktor’s face.

“We better be off.”  Viktor didn’t even bother smile at them before grabbing a pinch of Floo powder and throwing it in the fire before— “Hogwarts!”

Emerald flames rose up and Viktor disappeared.

“Er, bye, then,” Yuuri cringed, grabbing Floo powder and disappearing into the flames as quickly as he could.

A second later he found himself landing on the much less polished floor of Professor McGonagall’s office.

Viktor let out a huge sigh, dusting off his robes.

“I can’t tell you how relieved I am to be out of there.  Sorry about what they said.”

“It’s fine,” Yuuri said quickly.  “It was nice to meet your parents.”

He was lying.  Viktor could tell.

“Thanks anyway.”  He squeezed his arm.  “Let’s get out of here before Minerva thinks we’re trying to snoop.”

***

The mood at Hogwarts was pleasant and quiet, just how Yuuri liked it, but it was hard to believe it was already Christmas Eve.  Yuuri tried not to think about all the years he had spent with his family, so when Viktor suggested they go to Hogsmeade, he took the opportunity to get the worries off his mind.

Especially after visiting the Nikiforov Manor and seeing how empty Viktor’s room was, Yuuri felt more than ever that he had to get him something sentimental that he could keep as a reminder that they were friends.  Hogsmeade was his last chance.

The opportunity presented itself as they were strolling down the snowy streets, surprisingly busy even without the Hogwarts students.  It seemed all of the town had come to get last minute Christmas gifts.

“Let’s go in here,” Viktor suggested, pointing at one of the larger shops in Hogsmeade, which had a crowd around the front cases.

They pushed through the people until they were inside, facing aisles and aisles of miscellaneous things.

“Should we split up?” Yuuri asked.

“Sure,” Viktor said cheerfully and moved towards the greenery section, stopping by a pot of flowers that changed colors.

Yuuri made his way towards the back of the shop, browsing the shelves, desperately hoping he’d see something that just felt _right._ He spotted some clothes and moved closer to see the price on a dark grey scarf.  He winced and shoved it back on the rack.

It was only when he spotted the poster of the model wearing the scarf that the idea struck him.

He had forgotten about the pictures Phichit had taken.  And as he thought of them sitting in his trunk in the Gryffindor common room, he knew exactly what he needed.

Most of the frames on the shelves were excessively flashy; one said ‘Happy Birthday’ but the font kept changing, and another that was a horrible shade of magenta.  But, underneath a frame with flashing letters was a simple black one with no magical embellishments.

As Yuuri reached down to pick it up, he heard footsteps approaching.

“Are you almost done?” Viktor asked him, his hands empty.

“Er, yeah, just getting this for my...mum,” he decided.

“Cool!” Viktor chirped, then bent down to take one.  If he could tell Yuuri wasn’t being truthful, he didn’t show it. “Maybe I’ll give a framed picture to Georgi.  He likes that kind of stuff and his birthday is in two days.”

“It’s the day after yours?” Yuuri asked as they went to check out.  He handed over 3 Knuts and Viktor did the same.

“Yep.  He’s a year younger, though.  Only Chris and I are turning sixteen this year,” he shot a smile at the young witch behind the counter who blushed furiously as they grabbed their bags and left.

“Should we go to The Three Broomsticks?” Yuuri suggested as they stepped outside.  The sky was clear, but snow was starting to fall, and it was freezing. Viktor was only wearing thin, fashionable robes, and Yuuri shivered just remembering how cold it had been in St. Petersburg.

“Sounds good,” he agreed, snowflakes getting caught in his silver eyelashes.

It wasn’t until later, when they sat at the barstools with butterbeers in both of their hands, that Yuuri realized not once that day had he felt awkward or worried about impressing Viktor.  Somehow, his company had become _normal._

It was unforeseen and unbelievable and unpredictable, and Yuuri liked it.

***

The first thing Yuuri saw when he woke up on the twenty-fifth of December, was a large barn owl sitting on his trunk with an envelope tied to its foot.

“Sorry,” he mumbled, sitting up and showing his empty hands before untying it.  “I don’t have any treats.”

The owl hooted, clearly annoyed and flew out of the dormitory, leaving Yuuri with the thick envelope.  There were two letters inside, and a note on the back written on a torn piece of parchment.

_Yuuri,_

_We’re happy to hear that you’ve made some friends and hope this owl reaches you before Christmas Day.  Hopefully your time with Viktor was fun and you were sure to thank his family for letting you stay. Australia has been lovely so far and it’s unreal to see what this country has to offer.  It’s a shame you couldn’t come. We’ve been thinking of you and hope you’re doing well. Keep up with your studies and we’ll see you in a few months. Your father sends his best wishes as well._

_Katsuki Hiroko_

Yuuri swallowed hard, looking at the familiar handwriting, puzzled at how distant it seemed.  It had only been four months since he’d seen his family last and already he felt like a stranger.

Pushing the letter aside, he opened the next, pleased to see it was from his sister.

_Yuuri!_

_I hope Hogwarts is treating you well!  Mum told me you’re staying over at Viktor’s???  I’m pretty sure there’s only one Viktor Nikiforov in the world so you better tell me ALL ABOUT HIM when you get home in June.  I’ll be waiting._

_Mari <3 _

_P.S. Merry Christmas_

He smiled at her letter, remembering years ago when she watched Quidditch matches with him and bought him exclusive special edition posters of Viktor.  That led him to the last note, which was only one line long.

_Meet me in the room whenever you wake up -Viktor_

Filled with sudden excitement, the letter from his parents forgotten, Yuuri grabbed the package by his bedside table and scrambled out of the common room.

After running up six flights of stairs (that were staying surprisingly still for once), he made it to the room where they studied.  He paced back and forth, unable to stop the bounce in his step before the door appeared. When he opened it, he saw Viktor sitting at the desk with his wand pointed at the endless ceiling.

“That’ll do it,” he mumbled before waving his wand.

Slowly but surely, snow began to stream down.

“Where’d you learn that?” Yuuri beamed.

“Just picked it up somewhere,” he shrugged, a small smirk on his face.

“I’ll go first,” Yuuri said, and handed Viktor his gift.  “Merry Christmas and Happy Birthday,” he added shyly as Viktor unwrapped it with a smile.

Encased in the black frame was Phichit’s picture of them flying together during a lesson, their cloaks streaming behind them.  Their cheeks were tinged pink from either the cold or the fact that they were laughing, eyes on one another.

“Wow,” he breathed, then met his eyes.  “Thanks Yuuri. I really like it.”

“No problem,” he answered, suddenly feeling self conscious.  “Sorry it’s a little simple.”

“It’s perfect,” Viktor decided and set it down.  He pushed the long, thin package that had been sitting on the desk towards Yuuri.

His bubble of happiness vanished and a sickly feeling settled into his stomach as he carefully pushed away the tissue paper.

The stick of cherry wood and the carved word _Firebolt_ were all Yuuri needed to see.

“Oh, Viktor,” he said, too quickly, and pushed it back towards him.  “I can’t take this.”

“Why not?” he asked, sounding hurt.

“It’s just...” he swallowed hard and looked up at Viktor.  “It’s too much. It’s just not right, you know?”

“I don’t,” Viktor responded, his voice stinging.  “I thought you’d like it.”

“I do, but I can’t take it,” Yuuri said firmly.  “I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I took something like this for free.  I’d rather have something cheaper and more meaningful. Something that couldn’t be given to anyone else but me.”

For a moment, he thought Viktor might get mad at him, or maybe think he was being picky.  How could he explain that the Firebolt was worth more Galleons than his family even had? At the same time, Viktor could throw it around like it was nothing.

But instead, Viktor shifted in his seat to deflate the tension.

“I understand.”

***

It was New Year’s Eve, six days since Christmas Day.  Neither of them spoke of their uncomfortable encounter but instead spent their time studying together like nothing had happened.

Yuuri headed back to his dormitory after breakfast, relishing in the last few days the castle would be empty before classes started again.

On his nightstand was a framed picture of two boys holding hands and spinning in circles on the ice with wide smiles.

On the back was a note:

_Yakov gave this to me while we were in St. Petersburg.  I hope this present is a little better than the last._

_P.S. This time it’s meant just for you._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ahhh!!!!!!!! aren't they adorable?  
> 1\. kjgkjkd i'm so sorry this is out a day late AGAIN i just had the busiest week of my summer (got my permit! drove for the first time! had a job interview! went to two parties!) i was up til 2am editing this but just as i was reaching the last 1000 words i fell asleep oops  
> 2\. your comments are seriously so sweet oh my god every time i get an email notification and see it's from ao3 i get SO excited. thank you so much for reading i love you all :) <3
> 
> preview: _we were built to fall apart / then fall back together / your necklace hanging from my neck / the night we couldn't quite forget_


	4. time moved too fast

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _we were built to fall apart / then fall back together / your necklace hanging from my neck / the night we couldn’t quite forget_

****Exams were starting and Yuuri was in a frenzy.  He and Viktor had decided to put the Quidditch practices on a hold—well, mostly him—so there would be enough time for studying.  After all, he didn’t need to worry about any matches.

Midterms were putting everyone in a state of constant fatigue and worry, and Yuuri took consolation in the fact that Phichit had told him it was the last year they would have midterms, since O.W.L.s and N.E.W.T.s ran differently.

 _“How?”_ exclaimed Michele in frustration, prodding the four-legged textbook with his wand.  He sighed loudly, glancing at Yuuri for help.

“Here.  I’ll do it,” Phichit said with zero confidence, and waved his wand dramatically.  It worked—sort of. Now there was a speckled white cat on the table, its tail raised haughtily.  Upon further examination, Yuuri noticed the black spots were words.

“This is hopeless,” sighed Michele, flipping aimlessly through their real Transfiguration textbook.  “How on Earth are we supposed to be able to transform two feet tall animals by Wednesday?”

“Monday for me,” Yuuri said miserably.  “Thanks,” he brightened at the house elf that handed him a plate of steaming biscuits.

“Oh come on, you’ve already got it down,” Phichit complained, plucking a chocolate chip out of the biscuit and crushing it with his fingers before licking the gvooey remains off.

“Yeah, show us how to do it.”  Michele shut the book with a thud.  “If McGonagall can’t teach me, then maybe you can.”

“I can’t transform anything that big,” Yuuri said.  “Maybe she’ll give me a small cat.”

“Just try,” Michele sighed, resting his head on the table and watching the cat with pitiful eyes.

Yuuri gathered up all the willpower he had and pointed his wand at the cat which shrank back away from him.  There was a poof and then a furry textbook sat on the table. Behind the patches of white, _Quidditch Through The Ages_ could be read in gold print.

“Well at least yours doesn’t walk,” Michele grumbled, shoving another biscuit into his mouth.

“Let’s try Transfiguration another day,” Phichit said, and although all three knew pushing it off would do no good, they agreed quickly.

“What about Charms?” Yuuri suggested.  Unlike Transfiguration, Charms was less systematic, and required more emotion in the spells, which meant he wasn’t the best at it.  He was still confident he could do well, as long as he mastered each charm, but it meant hours of work for each.

“What was the exam last year?” asked Phichit, reaching over to the large stack of textbooks they had brought down to the kitchen to study.

“Cheering Charms,” Yuuri recalled.  “At least in Japan.”

“I could use one of those right now,” muttered Michele, glancing over at Phichit’s notes.

“It’ll probably be the Summoning Charm this year,” Phichit said.  “Flitwick literally made us take two full scrolls of parchment on it and we’ve been practicing it nonstop.”

 _“Accio,”_ Yuuri pointed his wand desperately at the biscuit sitting on the plate a few inches away from him.

It didn’t move.

“You’ve got to say it more like _Accio,”_ Phichit explained, and the biscuit flew towards him.  “Just position your wand like this…”

***

“How did you know that?” Yuuri asked in disbelief, staring at Viktor’s half-lit face.

They had finally managed to get the dark room to transform into something a little brighter, with a large bay window that showed the expansive castle grounds.

“I must have remembered it from class or something,” he shrugged.

“But it’s under the homework reading and you told me you didn’t do this part yet.”  he glanced through the questions on the sheet.   _Who was Tsar during the Russian Revolution?_   _What was his only son’s name?  What reason did Alexei have to believe his father was doing what was best for the country?  Why would he…_

The questions went on and on, in such intricate detail that even Yuuri didn’t know the answers to them.  He was becoming very glad he hadn’t taken Muggle Studies as a third elective.

“I probably skimmed it or something,” Viktor sighed.  “Can you quiz me on the French Revolution? I think I forgot most of it.”

The studying dragged on, each minute leaving Yuuri feeling less productive than the first.

Phichit had helped him with the Summoning Spell, and he was able to reach objects within a few feet radius, and a little more time would leave him feeling comfortable for Charms.

Transfiguration, on the other hand, would require hours before he was even close to what Professor McGonagall wanted.  A sinking feeling in his stomach told him she wouldn’t be too generous with points, either.

Potions was a peer assessment, which Yuuri was eternally grateful for.  Professor Snape didn’t seem to like him very much—probably because he was a Gryffindor—but as long as he was partnered with Viktor, he couldn’t dock too many points.  

He had History of Magic the next day, early in the morning, and his studying had not ceased.  It seemed Professor Binns was unaware that no one had been paying attention all year, and proclaimed that the test would be extremely easy, but the review questions had left Yuuri stumped.  Because no one he knew had taken notes, he was now reading straight from a textbook on the Goblin Rebellions, and trying to memorize any fact that was mentioned at least twice.

He was lucky there was no real way to measure one’s skill in Divination, and with all the time History of Magic was taking up, he had already decided on and memorized a fake prophecy for the exam if Professor Trelawney asked.  Phichit on the other hand was entranced in the class, and had even asked for extra lessons.

That left Defense Against the Dark Arts, a class that Yuuri had dreaded attending in the beginning of the year and now found himself enjoying immensely.  Slughorn could be a bit boring at times, but he tried his best to make the class interesting, and most of it was spent dueling. He’d even told them last week that their exam would be a duel, and seeing as Otabek and him were partners, they had practiced countless times.

The last two exams he had were on Wednesday, Arithmancy and Astronomy, which were both pleasant and easy, at least with the company of Viktor.

Midterms were starting all too soon, and while Yuuri enjoyed the time spent with Viktor, his mind was itching to do some studying of his own.

But he pushed it back.  He would help Viktor, even if it took away from the things he had to do.

He wasn’t sure why, but as he looked back at Viktor who was rambling on about peasants and kings and queens, he knew he wouldn’t be able to leave even if he wanted to.

***

_What are the four factors that must be taken into account when performing a Transfiguration spell?_

The moment Professor McGonagall announced they’d be having a quiz before the skills exam, Yuuri’s stomach had dropped.

The class was divided, the Ravenclaws looking smug and the Gryffindors glancing at each other with panic clear on their faces.  At least he wasn’t the only one that had assumed he wouldn’t need to study his notes.

“Miss Crispino, please keep your mouth shut,” Professor McGonagall boomed, and heads turned to Sara who had been whispering answers into Mila’s ear.

The large clock at the head of the room ticked on, and Yuuri forced himself to think.   _Concentration, viciousness, wand power, and—_ He glanced around in desperation, then forced himself to move onto the next question.

“Your time is up.  Please pass your papers forward.  Gryffindors, join me in the corridor for your exam.”

 _Body weight!_ Yuuri scrawled it down just in time, satisfied with his answer, and handed it to JJ in front of him.

As they made their way outside, Yuuri’s suspicions were confirmed.  There was a tawny barn owl sitting on a post, its talons digging into the wood.

“Your task is to transform this owl into an _Intermediate Transfiguration_ textbook.  Points will be awarded for successful transformation and if the book stays balanced on the post.”

JJ stepped up first, but his wand movement was a little too stiff and the book had a large feather protruding from the spine, although it stayed on top of the post.

Professor McGonagall wrote something down, her gaze stern, then transformed it back and nodded towards Leo.

Yuuri held his breath and watched as Leo stepped up and waved his wand.  The book still had two legs attached to it. Because of this, it stayed on the post, but Professor McGonagall pursed her lips and turned to her paper again.

Finally it was his turn, and he was sweating so badly that he was afraid his wand would slip out of his hands.  He muttered the incantation, his wand only quivering at the very end, and the owl popped into a book, but fell with a deadening thud on the ground.

She lifted it with her wand, and to his relief there was no sign it had just been a living thing.  Relieved, Yuuri made his way to the back of the line and watched as each student took their turn.

It was clear what they had to do in Charms from the single pillow sitting on a desk.  The rest were pushed up against the walls, leaving the classroom open. There was a shimmering circle close to where Professor Flitwick stood stoutly, around ten feet away from the pillow.

Ten feet.  He could do that.

“Alright, alright, you know what’s coming.  Line up here,” he waved his wand, and the students scrambled around, leaving Yuuri at the front of the line.

 _“Accio pillow!”_ he said, his wand outstretched.  He almost cried in relief as the pillow flew straight to him, hitting him in the chest.

“Bravo! Full marks, Katsuki, now, Babicheva, step up, yes, you’re next…”

Yuuri stepped back, glowing, and promised himself to thank Phichit a thousand times over.

Potions was a breeze, as expected, and although Professor Snape gave him a nasty glare as he chatted while Viktor added the ingredients, he grudgingly told them they’d aced it.  Or, rather, that it was “substantial, although it could’ve been better."

From the look on Viktor’s face, Yuuri knew there was no way it could've been any better.

***

“My dear, have you felt any unwelcome presences around you this year?”  Professor Trelawney had her eyes glued on Mila through her thick glasses and was moving her hands around a crystal ball that Yuuri was sure was just for the dramatic effect.

“Yeah, yo-er, yesterday, I meant.”  He smiled angelically. “I think my end is near.”

Professor Trelawney just regarded her with sad eyes and nodded solemnly.  “It is because Pluto is nearing alignment with Neptune.”

“Really,” she said, straight-faced.  “I thought it was due to Saturn’s orbit.”

“Ah well.  One who is new to Divination may think the same,” she said, and Phichit nodded along with her.

“Yuuri, what do you see in your crystal ball?” she asked, and everyone turned to look at him, some with pity on their faces.

“I see a broomstick,” he recited in a hushed tone like it was obvious, “flying through the clouds and, oh!  They’re holding the Snitch…”

“Perhaps you could be seeing the outcome of the next Quidditch match.  What color are the robes?”

“Hmm,” Yuuri said, waiting a full five seconds before pretending to catch a glimpse, “they’re green.”

“Slytherin, hmm?” she pondered, and pushed her glasses back up her nose.  “My own ball had just told me it will be a Hufflepuff victory, but I suppose not everyone has a clear Sight like me.”

“Professor, Hufflepuff isn’t even playing in the next match,” Mila called, and laughter broke out.

“Is that so, dear?” she asked, and if she was embarrassed, she didn’t show it.

“Yes,” Mila snickered.

“If you say so…”  She fixed her attention upon a Slytherin girl Yuuri didn’t know.  “Miss Eliot, what are the Fates saying to you today?”

***

The last month of Yuuri’s life had been fairly uneventful, with the exception of exams, which he’d ended up passing.  The excitement came as he sat in Defense Against the Dark Arts in the company of his friends.

“I’m going to hire strippers,” Chris decided.  “There’s no doubt about that. This party has to be the best one yet.  The question is how I’ll be able to get them into the school.”

They were discussing his plans for his birthday, which included the rescheduled party from the beginning of the year.

“I don’t think you’ll be able to,” Viktor sighed, like it was the greatest inconvenience in the world.

Yurio just made a face.  “You’re both disgusting.”

“Don’t worry.  You’ll understand when you’re older.”  He winked, and Yurio’s face contorted even more than before.

“What if you get someone from inside the school to strip?  That way you wouldn’t have to smuggle anyone in,” suggested Mila, looking amused.

Yuuri was relieved to see Chris seemed to be the only one who was taking it seriously.

A Slytherin girl in front of them turned back to look, then whispered something to her friend.  They both made faces at each other.

“Get a pole,” Viktor said.  “And some firewhiskey. I reckon you’ll have more than a few strippers by the end of the night.”

“You’re a genius, Nikiforov,” Chris marvelled.

And that was that.

***

February brought even colder weather than before, but the excitement in the Great Hall during lunch was warmer and more enthusiastic than ever before.  It was Chris’s Birthday, or perhaps as equally important, Valentine’s Day.

The unspoken trend was to send anonymous notes through the school owls to fellow classmates.  Yuuri had discovered this earlier, while trying to mail a letter to his sister and finding there were no owls left.

To his equal surprise and fluster, he spotted a dark brown owl flying towards him, and it dropped a box.  All around him, the Gryffindors were tearing open their own packages and notes, finding heart shaped chocolates that beat at the heart rate of whoever had sent it and notes with letters cut out from newspapers like in Muggle spy movies.

As Yuuri peeled open the package addressed to him, he was a bit disappointed to see it was just from his sister, a box of assorted chocolate hearts.

“Ooh, who’s that from?” Leo asked, leaning over.  He apparently had an admirer, as there was an opened envelope sitting on the edge of his plate.

“No one,” he said quickly.  Despite not needing a relationship at the current point in his life, Yuuri was still a little insecure about the fact that every other Gryffindor seemed to have gotten some type of affirmation that they were attractive and admirable.

“I got this, but I’m not sure who it’s from,” Leo sighed, staring at the card that showed two halves of a heart moving towards one another.  The image would reset every few seconds and play over so smoothly that Professor Flitwick would’ve been proud.

It wasn’t very hard to tell who had charmed the card however, as Guang Hong sat across from them with very red cheeks, eating the chocolate covered pretzels at an alarming rate as if to make up for his lack of conversation.

Leo was still sitting there, dumbfounded and staring at the card over and over again that for a moment, Yuuri almost liked Valentine’s Day.

It only lasted for a second though, as the food vanished and he headed off to Arithmancy, hopeful that they could pretend it was a normal day in there.

“Alright everyone, please settle down,” Professor Vector smiled, waving her wand as the numbers on the chalkboard were erased.  “I have a few Valentines I’ve been asked to hand out to people in this class. Apparently there weren’t enough owls.”

Yuuri sighed, wishing the class to start already.

“Viktor, this one’s for you,” she put it on his desk, face down and if Yuuri wasn’t mistaken, he saw Viktor roll his eyes.

“This one too, and-wow, well, here’s another…”

Yuuri watched as the pile of Valentines from her hand went down and built up on Viktor’s desk, each one causing Viktor to look even more bored, maybe even a little annoyed.

It made Yuuri wonder how many people hated him for befriending Viktor in just a few months.

“Thanks,” he said as she handed him the last one and she clapped her hands enthusiastically.

“Well that’s all!  We can move onto the number seven now.  Do you remember last class when I mentioned Bridget Wenlock?  Her work can be very useful when it comes to understanding the complex history...”

As Professor Vector continued and waved her wand so writing appeared on the blackboard, Yuuri watched out of the corner of his eye.  Viktor grabbed the stack of red, pink, and white and opened his bag, which was unusually full.

Yuuri saw why, soon enough—it was crammed with notes and countless boxes of chocolates he must have received during lunch.  There was even a suspicious looking vial that looked to be the same distinctive pearl color as Amortentia. Viktor’s hair covered his eye as he bent down, trying to fasten the buttons, wincing as they heard a thread split.

“You okay there, Nikiforov?” Professor Vector asked, and Yuuri quickly avoided his eyes, turning back to face her.

“Of course,” he said smoothly, and if he’d seen Yuuri looking, he didn’t say a thing.

All Yuuri had wanted, and still wanted, was to _be_ wanted.  Viktor had plenty of that, and Yuuri got a funny feeling in his stomach as he sank back into his chair and forced himself to write.  After all, he had to focus to get his work done in class so he’d be able to make it to Chris’s party that night.

***

“He _actually_ got a stripper pole?” asked Phichit, craning his neck to see towards the center of the room.  “I thought you were joking!”

“I was,” Yuuri muttered.  “I didn’t know he would.”

“This is _insane._  I’ve never been in here before.  Oh look at the squid!”

Yuuri tried to see, but there were too many heads in the way and the blaring lights made it hard to focus his eyes on anything.

“You made it!” Mila pushed her way through a circle of people to smile at Yuuri.  “I thought you didn’t like crowds very much.”

“I don’t,” he said, and winced as someone turned the volume of the music so loud that his ears started ringing.

“Loosen up a bit,” she smiled and nudged his shoulder.  “Viktor’s here, but considering over half the school is, you might have a hard time finding him.  I came here with Otabek and he’s nowhere to be found either.”

“Thanks,” he half-shouted so she could hear, and a guy—was it Georgi?—called her name.  She turned around, then a second later he grabbed her hand and pulled her towards the dance floor.

“Yuuri?”

“Right here!” he glanced behind him, thankful to see he hadn’t lost Phichit.

“Yuuri!” someone else called, and Yuuri stumbled backwards towards Phichit, seeing Chris standing next to him.

“You look good,” the older boy grinned, then put his arm around Phichit.  “I was just talking to your friend. He’s very interesting.”

Phichit looked confused, but was taking it surprisingly well as he tilted his head towards Chris in a friendly manner.

“Why don’t you have a drink?” Chris suggested, nodding towards the table where there were glasses bubbling over with what he presumed was firewhiskey.

“Er, I don’t drink,” he said, as Chris shrugged.

“Okay, well, I’m stealing your friend.  We’ll be back in a bit.” And with that, Phichit shot him an apologetic glance before heading off with Chris towards where the pack of people was much denser.

“Sorry!” called a girl in a bright pink dress as she bumped into him.  Yuuri felt liquid douse his left leg and he winced, stepping back.

“Hey!” another girl snapped and he stumbled forward, realizing he had stepped on her toes.

With a whirling mind, suddenly the table of drinks seemed very appetizing, so he took a deep breath and made his way over.

Just one should be enough to numb everything a bit so he could have some fun.  He tried not to think of his parents as he picked up the delicate glass and studied it for a second.

A single sip made his throat burn, and his face contorted involuntarily.  As he pulled back to look at it again, he decided Chris must have some pretty useful connections.

“Sorry, mate!” Someone bumped into him from behind, and his drink sloshed forward, missing a girl’s dress by mere centimeters.

“You’re good,” he muttered, not wanting to turn around and see who it was.  He paused, looking at what was left of his drink, and downed it.

Now his hands fought for something to do, searching for pockets in his old dress robes futilely.  When they came up with nothing, he swallowed away his burning throat and grabbed another glass on his way to the center of the room.

The heat of the crowd was surrounding a muscled seventh year, one of the Beaters on the Hufflepuff team.  He was circling the pole, an abandoned drink on the ground.

Yuuri strained his neck to see for just a second longer, before someone cut into his thoughts.

“Excuse me,” said someone behind him.

He turned and was met by a very delicate looking girl.  He recognized her as a Slytherin who sat in front of him in Defense Against the Dark Arts.

“What?” he asked.  His brain felt fuzzy, and her lips pressed together.  He wondered if it maybe sounded rude, so took a few more mouthfuls of his drink.

“Oh.  Well I was just wondering if you wanted to dance,” she said, rather loudly so she could be heard.  There were now whistles coming from behind him, and he turned to see the Hufflepuff had taken off his shirt.

“Okay,” he replied dumbfoundedly, then reached awkwardly around for a place to put his drink.  When he found none, he tipped his head back and swallowed the whole thing, then set it on the ground, hoping no one would step on it.

“Great,” she said, and grabbed both of his hands then pulled him towards the other side of the room where there were people dancing to the heavy beat of the music.  It had been so loud that Yuuri had almost forgotten it was playing, but now it was pounding into his head one note at a time.

At first, he was conscious of his steps, not wanting to step on the Slytherin girl’s toes or bump into other people, but soon enough someone shoved another drink in his hand.  He drank it a bit too quickly, but he found himself relaxing, his shoulders coming undone just a little more.

The girl reached up and pulled his head down to meet hers, twisting her lips around his.  He made a noise of surprise, but the music covered it.

It was rather nice kissing her, he decided.  She tasted of firewhiskey—or maybe that was just him—and was now pressed up against him as they moved to the beat of the music.

“I’ve seen you around and I really like you,” came a voice in his ear.  “Hopefully we can continue this thing past tonight.”

Yuuri wasn’t sure what she had just told him, so he chose to nod and then reach down to kiss her again.

They made out for what could’ve been between a few seconds to an hour, Yuuri wasn’t really sure.  At one point he found himself discarding his outer robes and then attaching himself back to the girl who seemed very pleased.

They danced their way over to the drinks table, where he grabbed another.  It didn’t taste very good at this point, and he felt a bit sick to his stomach, but he was probably just dizzy from the dancing.

A cold drink would probably help, anyway.

As the night wore on, everything seemed to become brighter and louder.  At one point he heard Chris call him over, and maybe it was getting a little hot so he took his tie off.

Yes, that felt much better.

“Get rid of that shirt!” someone called and the girl next to him who was clutching his sweaty hand, nodded vigorously.

The music seemed to slow and Yuuri found himself more and more comfortable.  What a nice feeling it was, to not worry about everything there was going on.

***

“Yuuri?”

“Mm,” he mumbled and rolled back into his pillow.

“Yuuri, you have to get up.”

He opened his eyes slowly, everything out of focus.

He blinked.

Then blinked again.

Otabek was standing next to his bed, the rest of the dormitory empty.

“Breakfast is almost over.  You need to get to class. Er, if you’re able to.”

Yuuri glanced around, still taking in everything.  His head was pounding and his stomach cramping.

“CanIgetadrink,” he cracked out and sat up, his throat dry.

“Erm, I have to go, Transfiguration is starting in two minutes.  Do you want me to tell Professor McGonagall you’ll be late?

Yuuri couldn’t tell if Otabek was acting weirdly or if his mind was making things up, but every time he blinked, the room refocused and it was making his head ache nearly as much as his stomach.

“You can go ahead,” he said, dazing in and out.  “Tell her I’m not feeling well.”

“Okay, well, try to get up and do something before Charms starts,” he advised, and then rushed out, bag flying behind him.

Yuuri swung his feet over the edge of his bed, everything numb.

 _Oh.  I wear glasses.  That’s why everything’s so blurry._ Yuuri reached out for his glasses and winced as everything came into painful focus.  The red drapes of the Gryffindor dormitory were blinding in their crisp detail.

He made his way to the bathroom, the tiles freezing cold to his bare feet and hobbled over to the sink.

He looked terrible.

There were circles under his eyes and his hair was a mess.  There was a word written on his arm, but the ink was too smudged to tell what it had said.  Why had he—?

It struck him in the chest, hard—the party.  He had gone to Chris’s party...right? He remembered the lights and talking to Phichit briefly.

But funnily enough, he couldn’t really remember anything else.  Maybe he had shown up for the beginning and left quickly and had just been so tired he’d forgotten.  Maybe he was sick and that was why he felt so terrible.

Suddenly, a bitter taste in his mouth ruptured and he made a dash towards a toilet, clutching his glasses against his face as he threw up his guts, wracking his whole body.

He sat back, his stomach still throbbing and leaned against the frigid wall.  What on earth had happened at Chris’s party last night?

***

“It’s good to see you back and in class,” Chris greeted as he sat down in Defense Against the Dark Arts.

“Yeah, I wasn’t feeling too good yesterday so I skipped Potions,” he said.  “Sorry I didn’t stay too long at your party, I just felt terrible.”

He reached the conclusion confidently that he must have left early, considering Phichit hadn’t brought it up at all during their free period yesterday, or in History of Magic that morning.

“What do you mean you didn’t stay too long?” Mila looked puzzled, concern clear on her face.  “Do you not—?”

“He left early, remember?” Viktor bit in, and they all fell silent.

She gave him a worried glance that Yuuri might have noticed had he not been busy pulling out his quill and then looking back at them.

“Oh, right,” she said a little too quickly.

Yurio looked very upset by this all, and he wasn’t meeting Yuuri’s eyes, rather deciding to direct his looks at Otabek.  They seemed to be having a conversation without even speaking.

In fact, it seemed everyone was in on something that he didn’t know.  Maybe he’d missed a joke in Potions yesterday.

“Hey, Yuuri,” said a voice from in front of them.  It was a girl with long brown hair which was nearly half her height, and a petite face.

“Erm, hi,” he replied.  He wondered briefly how she knew his name.

“I just wanted to say, well,”—her friend let out a shrewd giggle—“if you need help getting caught up on the Potions homework, let’s just say you know where to find me.”  With that, she turned back, shooting her friend a gleeful smile and pretending to focus on the work in front of her.

“Right,” he said, a bit awkwardly, then whispered to Georgi who was the closest to him in what he hoped was a quiet voice, “what’s her name?”

She must have heard because she looked back, her mousy brown hair swinging behind her as she met his eyes for a second, then turned back just as quickly as she’d come, whispering furiously to her friend.

“You don’t know her name?” Georgi asked, loudly enough for the whole class to hear.

“Shut up, Georgi,” Yurio said at the same volume, if not louder.  “He’s only joking, right, Yuuri?”

 _“This_ is a joke, right?” he bargained and kicked himself as Yurio shook his head faster than a house elf could Disapparate.  He stopped the moment the girl turned back around, her eyes wide.

To his absolute dismay, she stood up, looking on the brink of tears.  She then proceeded to rush out of the room, brushing past a bewildered Slughorn.

“Oh dear,” Slughorn said, as he dusted off his robes and did a double take.  “Is she alright?”

“No,” her friend stood up defiantly and sent a dirty glare towards their group.  “Her name is Iris Eliot, and she is _not okay.”_

And with that, she stormed out of the room too, leaving a very stunned Yuuri.

“Oh dear,” Slughorn repeated, breaking the silence.  “Is _she_ alright?”

***

Anything that had seemed off after the fourteenth of February slowly dissipated into nothing, and Yuuri was beginning to forget the whole incident.  Mostly. Only his relationship with Viktor remained a bit more distant since then, although it might’ve been that they were spending less time together now due to increased schoolwork.

The month was now coming to an end, and he was attending the Ravenclaw versus Slytherin game.

He found himself sitting among the Hufflepuffs with Phichit.  Michele was busy serving detention with Professor McGonagall for getting twelve percent on a quiz, which Yuuri didn’t even know was possible.  Even if he’d guessed on every question, he should’ve gotten at least twenty percent, right?

“Here they come!” Phichit cheered as the Ravenclaws entered the pitch flying on an assortment of Cleansweep Sevens and Nimbus 2000s.  They circled around the pitch, attracting cheers from everyone.

A louder cheer overtook the stadium as the Slytherins came out.  Yuuri almost laughed when he saw Yurio was half the height of the Keeper, but kept it in by only his unspoken fondness of the boy.

His eyes swept a little farther, and his heart dropped out of his chest as he spotted the girl from Defense Against the Dark Arts—Iris, her name was.

Again, he wracked his brain, but he couldn’t recall ever talking to her before.  Maybe they’d met during tryouts? But he remembered every second as clear as day and she had no role in it.

“Hey Phichit—” he said, but Madam Hooch cut him off.  As she spoke, a spell reverberated her voice around the packed pitch.

“Welcome to the third Inter-house Quidditch game,” she said, and the crowd went wild as if the game had already started.

“What?” hissed Phichit over the screams all around them.

“Nothing,” Yuuri said.  “I’ll ask you later.”

The crowd roared as the Ravenclaws settled into formation on the field.  They were led by a burly looking Beater that Yuuri recognized as Margaret Vardo, a fifth year.

The cheers only got louder as Riley Cabello, a blonde Chaser waved, and Sara beamed from beside her.  It was clear they were the most popular on the team, probably due to their good looks and athleticism.

As the Slytherins pulled to a stop across from the Ravenclaws, the volume escalated.

“It would be the third year that Ravenclaw’s won the Cup,” Phichit said in his ear.  “Most of the school is with Slytherin for this one.”

Finally, Madam Hooch blew her whistle and the teams took off, one of the Ravenclaw Chasers grabbing the Quaffle almost immediately.

“What were you going to say earlier?” Phichit asked him.

“Well, I just saw—”

“And they’re off!  Cabello already has the Quaffle, but the Slytherin Keeper, Rook, is in a good position right now.  She’ll have a hard time getting it in,” Madam Hooch’s voice interrupted him again.

“You saw what?” Phichit scooted closer so he could hear.

“This girl-Iris I think her name is,” Yuuri started.

“Yeah, she’s—”

“Cabello misses!  Brilliant save from Rook there!  Is he still on his broom? Oh, oh!”

The Slytherin Keeper was holding on for dear life and one of the Ravenclaw Beaters, Eleanora Cuyper, directed a nasty Bludger at him.  By some miracle it hit him from below and gave him the boost to pull back onto his broom, but he looked severely scarred.

“Erm, anyway,” Phichit continued, although both of the boys had their eyes glued to the game. “She’s a Chaser on the team.  I don’t know how popular she is but she only made it in this year—”

“Kolar has got the Quaffle after a little bit of a toss up there with Linard, but he’s really got it and-what’s he doing?!” Madam Hooch cut off her announcement as the Ravenclaw Chaser threw the hard earned Quaffle straight towards the hoops where Rook, the Slytherin Keeper was to block it easily.

The Slytherins booed joyously as if to mock the Ravenclaws.  They responded by cheering even louder to encourage their team.

“So she only made it this year?” Yuuri asked, leaning even closer and taking advantage of the lapse in commentary.

“Yeah, I mean I have a few classes with her but all she does is giggle and gossip.  I think she’s a transfer from Cyprus but she came here in our second y—”

“Oh! Slytherin’s got possession of the Quaffle!  Linard looks ready to score and _oh!”_

A Bludger whacked onto the side of Luca Vesely’s head as she spun off course and the Quaffle sank into the middle hoop.

“Penalty!” Yuuri shrunk back as Phichit jumped up furiously.  He was one of the few, and the Hufflepuffs beside them glared until he sat back down.

“I thought you wanted Slytherin to win,” Yuuri said, bewildered.

“Yeah, well.  That was dirty,” he scowled.

Yuuri hid his smile behind his red and gold scarf.

“Slytherin ten zero!” called Madam Hooch.  “Linard has the Quaffle _again!_  He’s really pulling his weight this game.  And he loops around! Well it seems Vesely is back on her broom.  Poels, I’m warning you, if you aim another Bludger at—”

Deeming it an uneventful moment in the game, Yuuri sought his answers and prompted Phichit.

“So she’s not super popular but she has friends.  Any reason she would know me?”

“Well, erm,” Phichit said, his eyes darting back and forth between Yuuri and the game.  He seemed transfixed, although Linard was doing nothing but circling around the pitch, which was causing the stomping of the stands to get louder and louder, building up the anticipation.

“Has someone seen the Snitch?” Yuuri asked, turning his eyes up towards the sky, but Phichit didn’t seem to be looking there either.

“Sorry.  I just got a bit distracted, Yuuri.  I mean, she...” he stumbled and paused, as if begging for Madam Hooch to interrupt him.

“And Linard shoots and he’s in!  Just barely in reach of Vesely’s fingers!  And Cabello has the Quaffle! Good catch there…”

“Slytherin’s in really good shape today,” Phichit pondered out loud.  “Their first match they were flattened by Gryffindor. And Ravenclaw already won against Hufflepuff, which means they must have done some intensive training.  The Chasers and Keepers especially are moving so quickly you’d think they all had Firebolts.”

Yuuri squirmed a little uncomfortably at that, not wanting to think about Christmas Day.

“Who do you reckon’s in the running for the Cup?” he asked, directing the conversation.

“Well if Ravenclaw can pull this match off, they’ll have won two and almost certainly be in the top two.  Unless Gryffindor and Hufflepuff are playing and keep gathering points, then all three could be. But I’ve got to admit our practices haven’t been going as well as we want them too.”

“Hmm,” Yuuri replied complacently, his mind still buzzing on Iris.

“Slytherin is at forty twenty but it looks like Cabello has a plan up there.”

Indeed, Riley Cabello had the Quaffle again and was circling just like Iris, building up the cheers of the crowds.  A group of three Ravenclaws who looked to be second or third years were holding a large sign with a life size painting of her which was waving its wand and smiling.

A cheer came from the Ravenclaw section, and a groan from Phichit, but Yuuri ignored it and tried to ask again.

“So about Iris…could I have met her at Chris’s party or something?”

He struck home.  Phichit blinked hard and his eyes remained gazing at the game but they had a far out look.

“Yuuri, well, are you sure you want to talk about this?”

“Why wouldn’t I?”

Phichit didn’t meet his eyes.

“It’s just, if you don’t remember, maybe you shouldn’t…”

“I didn’t do anything wrong, did I?”

A roar emerged from the Ravenclaw section again and Yuuri distinctly heard Madam Hooch’s excited voice.

“An incredible comeback from Ravenclaw!  Eliot is getting tired, and Rook is getting sloppy.  Cabello is really pulling them ahead and _yes!_  Ravenclaw seventy forty!  Now would be a good time for the Snitch, Crispino.  Or, Plisetsky, I suppose, yes,” she added as a model of a serpent being levitated by the Slytherins opened its mouth and hissed.  A purple tongue made out of chocolate frog wrappers extended limply.

“I hope Yurio catches it,” Phichit sighed dreamily, but Yuuri didn’t miss the hard forced sound to his voice.

 _“Phichit.”_ He was on the edge of the bleacher now, aware of how the metal was cutting into his robe, and the cold seeping through.

“Fine.  You have to  act like you knew all along when you’re around her, okay?” Phichit demanded, turning to face Yuuri at last.  He nodded firmly, to give Phichit all his assurance.

“I went away with Chris and when I came back the two of you were dancing.  I’m not sure who asked who,” he said. “But then Chris started asking for the dances to break up and to do some other activities and that’s when you left.  You were only there for maybe twenty minutes. You guys danced, and that’s it.”

A breath of relief escaped Yuuri’s lips, visible in the icy puff in the air.  It all made sense. Finally, it all made sense.

Suddenly, and without warning, people raised their arms, their oversized sleeves falling back on their arms, exposing them to the frigid air.  What started as a few gasps turned into a thunderous collection of voices, half protestant and the other half joyous.

Yuuri glanced up and nearly punched himself in fury.  He’d missed it: Sara Crispino was flying down with the Snitch in her right hand.  Her hair that had been braided into a bun in the beginning of the game now flowing freely behind her.

 _“What?!”_ exclaimed Phichit and the two rose to their feet, although Yuuri didn’t know whether it was to show their support or anger.

Either way, Yuuri found himself standing on his tiptoes in excitement, watching as the students shouted their lungs out, the Ravenclaws hugging strangers and the Slytherin serpent abandoned.  Caught up in the whirlwind of Hogwarts, he had forgotten the reason he loved Quidditch was the energy of the crowd. If only he’d been good enough to make the team…

***

“I thought we could do something a little different today,” said Viktor, pacing the empty Quidditch pitch which was covered in a layer of slush.

Maybe Yuuri would’ve been more excited if he didn’t say this every time they had practice.

“What are we doing?” he asked, squinting critically at a group of girls who were sitting outside of the pitch and watching, presumably there for Viktor.

“I was thinking,” Viktor said grandly, and one of the girls almost toppled over, as if this were some revolutionary idea.  “It’s always been me teaching you.”

“Well you are, you know, like, the best Seeker in the world.  I’m not sure there’s much I could do for you,” Yuuri said.

Viktor ignored this.

“I thought you could teach me today.  Point out some things that you always pay attention to.  I can try to mess up a few things, otherwise you’ll have nothing to correct.”  He winked good naturedly.

“Viktor, I’d just feel a bit…” Yuuri grasped for the right word before deciding on the obvious choice, “stupid.”

“Just do it,” Viktor rolled his eyes and threw a leg over his Firebolt.

“I’m not good at taking control,” he said, stalling.

“Sure you’re not,” mumbled Viktor with a single raised raised eyebrow pointed at a pile of particularly muddy slush on the ground.

“What?” Yuuri frowned.  He was having a hard time hearing over the squeals of the girls adjacent from them.  He might have heard him wrong, but...it wouldn’t be the first scornful, and frankly, unwarranted, comment he’d heard from him in the past few weeks.

“Nothing,” Viktor replied, although he sounded a bit haughty.  “Just get on your broom and let’s go.”

The lesson surprisingly went well, and Yuuri found himself falling easily into place, correcting Viktor’s position and techniques for scanning the pitch, even properly avoiding their “audience”.  Constantly leaning off center on his broom for a whole hour practically killed his thighs though, and they ended up laying on a patch of the pitch that Viktor had cleared with his wand.

The girls were now long gone, and the two of them were silent.  Yuuri couldn’t help still feeling disturbed from how different they felt since December.  Everything had happened so quickly and now that they were slowing down, it was like they were moving farther and farther apart.

“Viktor,” he said, and saw his companion’s head lift up instinctively.  He didn’t dare look at him. “I just wanted to say that I really appreciate you doing this for me.  I know you could be hanging out with your friends, and teaching me probably isn’t your favorite activity.  Well, I know it isn’t.”

“Why’s that?” Viktor piped in.  His voice was strange, but there was an edge to it that told Yuuri he was curious.

“Well.”  Yuuri considered shutting up, but he’d been bothered for months and he wanted to set the record straight. “I felt like I was really getting to know you in December, even in January too.  We spent so much time together studying, but now you just seem more...distant.” Viktor’s head raised infinitesimally again. “It’s like time moved too fast.”

There was a long silence.  Yuuri felt calmer than he thought he would have.  He was thankful for whatever time he had with Viktor.  Spending time with him had never been an expectation, rather a gift.

“I hope to be around you more,” said Viktor in a much softer voice.  It was the one he remembered. “You don’t have to feel like I’m doing you a favor.  We have the deal, remember? And for the record...I do enjoy teaching you.”

Yuuri’s heart skipped a beat, although he wasn’t sure why.  They had a deal. Right. Viktor would put up with teaching him, uphold his side of the deal to pass Muggle Studies.

“It’s my fault I’ve been acting weird,” Viktor continued, not sensing Yuuri’s mental battle.  “You have me back. Wholeheartedly.”

***

Already, March was emerging and the second Quidditch game in the past two weeks was starting.  This time, Yuuri was sitting among the Slytherin crowd, as Phichit and Michele were both on the field with the rest of their team in canary yellow robes.  A few feet away was the Gryffindor team, Mila and Otabek engaged in the seven-person huddle. Madam Hooch stood between them in formal black robes, her magical whistle floating next to her head.

“Who do you reckon is going to win?” asked Georgi.  He had red lipstick on in his support for Gryffindor.

“I’d be embarrassed if Gryffindor lost,” Yurio scowled.  Yuuri wasn’t quite sure if it was because he himself had lost to them, or because he was supporting his friends.  It was likely that he and Otabek were the closest to each other, despite knowing Viktor, Mila, Chris, and Georgi for almost his whole life.

“Gryffindor.  Mila is lightning fast on her broom,” Chris said, an admirable look in his eyes—although his eyes strayed to Phichit for a lingering moment.  “I hope Hufflepuff can pull out a win, this year, though. And I’d rather them win against Gryffindor now than Slytherin next game.”

“Our team is screwed,” muttered Yurio. “Our Beaters aren’t good for anything, and our Keeper is so blind he wouldn’t see a hippogriff right in front of him.”

“I always feel a bit bad for the teams,” Yuuri admitted.  “I mean it must be disappointing not to win anything all year.”

Viktor and Chris exchanged a glance that Yuuri missed, distracted by the balls being brought out onto the pitch with a wave of Madam Hooch’s wand.

“You’re too good for this school,” Viktor grinned. “Nearly everyone here would love to see at least one team burn.”

“It would be nice for everyone to have at least one win,” Yuuri smiled, sticking to his own philosophy.

“I think it’s possible,” Georgi said offhandedly.  “I mean, Slytherin won the first game, then Ravenclaw.  So if either of them won again last game, then Hufflepuff won this time…” he paused, doing the math in his head, “then Gryffindor could win the next match and they all would have won one.”

“But for the Cup, it’s the points that matter either way,” Yurio said grudgingly.  “Because we were so ahead in the first game, even though Mila caught the Snitch, they only won by twenty points.”

“So technically, if Slytherin won the next one by a lot, and the Gryffindor and Ravenclaw game finished quickly, maybe we could win the Cup…”

The game started slowly, the Chasers practically exchanging the Quaffle every turn, until they reached eighty eighty and Viktor was literally yawning, like he’d seen much more exciting games.  He probably had, come to think of it.

But then—

“Finally a team in the lead!” exclaimed Madam Hooch, clearly relieved.  “Gryffindor is in the lead. Nice shot there Kuznetsov! And she’s already got the Quaffle again!”

It was like the crowd had arose from a deep slumber, people suddenly screaming in excitement.

Georgi had to be the only person in the audience who looked disappointed.

“I hope no one likes Anya _too_ much,” he grumbled disheartedly.  “I mean we’ve been talking ever since December but I still haven’t found the right time to ask her out.  I don’t see her very often, and I don’t even know if she has a boyfriend. But if I ask her out now, then she might think I just like her because she’s good at Quidditch...”

“Shut up, Georgi.  We’re trying to enjoy the game,” Yurio said.  It was hard to detect the brotherly affection underneath his annoyed tone.  Nevertheless, it was there.

“Gryffindor one twenty to eighty!  Babicheva and Crispino still look lost up there, though.  It would be a good time to get the Snitch…”

“Hey!” Viktor said, his trained eyes fixing on a Bludger that was moving unusually fast.

“Otabek will get it,” Yurio said, and he was right—the boy visibly urged his broom to move faster.  A second later, he hit the Bludger down to the ground—far away from Mila—with a satisfying smack.

“That doesn’t fit Quidditch regulations,” Viktor said, the suspicious edge still present in his voice.  “It’s going way too fast.”

“It’s fine, old man,” Yurio settled back into the bleachers, leaning on Georgi’s knee.

It looked as if Madam Hooch was apprehensive too, noticing how quickly the ball ricocheted off the pole of one of the large hoops and sped back into the air.  This time JJ got it, hitting it so meatily with his club that it shot right through one of the goal hoops and out of the pitch.

“He should become a Chaser with that aim,” murmured Yuuri to himself, admiring how each of the players moved fluidly, encouraging and feeding off the crowd’s energy.

“Chulanont scores again!” announced Madam Hooch, earning a few groans from the Gryffindors.  Yuuri however, was thrilled that his friend’s hard work was paying off.

“We’re back to Gryffindor at one thirty and Hufflepuff at one twenty!” she yelled excitedly.

“This is going to be a close match,” Viktor said, his voice still cautious.  “It all relies on Mila and Michele.”

Yuuri involuntarily shuddered at just the thought of the amount of pressure Mila must be under.  To make matters worse, the Bludger kept heading upwards, almost like it was unbalanced, causing both the Hufflepuff and Gryffindor Beaters to rush up and take care of it.  At one point it persisted so much that JJ pulled his broom up against Otabek’s and they exchanged a few words.

A minute later, JJ zoomed down to the game where the other Bludger was and Otabek hovered around to keep it from Mila.

“Who do you reckon is going to get the Snitch?” asked Yuuri anxiously.  The activity below where the hoops were and the Chasers and Keepers dodging and shooting was now being ignored.

“It’s hard to tell,” Yurio said, his head craned above the sea of green and scanning the sky.

“Mila,” Viktor said certainly, and Yuuri instantaneously felt a pang for Michele.

Suddenly, there was a loud thud and the Bludger hit home, or almost.  The bristles on the back of Michele’s broom were almost flattened and he clung on for dear life as it took a nosedive.

“Someone take care of that damn Bludger!” yelled Madam Hooch.  Otabek and one of the Hufflepuff Beaters who Yuuri did not know were going after it as quickly as they could, but their training and brooms were not meant for such fast speeds.

Finally, Madam Hooch groped the open air near her and grabbed her whistle, blowing it in an ear-splitting screech.

Yuuri’s hands flew to his ears, and he wasn’t alone.  Viktor and Chris both swore heavily and Georgi jumped a foot in the air, causing Yurio to nearly tumble forward.

“TIME OUT!” she bellowed.  Michele was first to the ground, his broom already carrying him there safely, then JJ and the Chasers and Keepers.  Otabek and Mila flew down together, followed by the Hufflepuffs.

She was now speaking furiously towards them all and Professor McGonagall hurried out, Professor Sprout right behind her.  Instantly, the students all around turned to talk to one another. The pitch was buzzing with an uncontained, nervous sort of excitement.

“That Bludger’s still going up there,” Chris observed.  Indeed it was, now going in circles until it’s course suddenly smoothed out and it drifted to the ground like it was strung on a rope.  It reached Professor McGonagall who flicked her wand, sending it to the ground. A swell of red and yellow, plus the three professors obscured the crowd’s view as they all leaned to look at it.

“I knew it was going to cause problems,” Viktor rolled his eyes.  “Do you remember the World Cup of 1944 when—”

Yuuri never found out what happened in the Quidditch World Cup of 1944 because Madam Hooch was already ushering the two heads of Houses off the field.  The pitch went silent, or as silent as it could be, as she set the Bludger back into the sky with her wand.

“It’s okay now?” Yuuri was taken aback.  Already, Michele was being handed a new broom.

“Already?” Viktor frowned.

The game started up again, Phichit taking possession of the Quaffle, but being blocked by Takeshi, a former Mahoutokoro student Yuuri had seen around in the halls.  They’d even played together on the team back there for a year before he left. It was weird to see him again but in a totally different environment.

The Bludger seemed to be normal for only a few seconds before it’s course became jagged once more and steadily rose into the air.

“What’s going on?” Yuuri said, now alarmed.  Hadn’t they just checked it?

It was moving even faster and people were jumping up from the stands, pointing.  Mila and Michele were moving far too high to see that the Bludger was headed right towards them.

Even Madam Hooch, with her eagle eyes, was busy watching the action unfold right in front of her as Anya scored right past Takeshi’s outstretched arm.

Finally there was a yell and for a moment, Yuuri’s heart stopped. Had the Bludger hit someone?

But it was Mila, speeding to the center of the field at a slight decline.  The Snitch! She had spotted the Snitch!

However, the yells of the crowd were not encouraging in the slightest.  Even a Gryffindor was holding her hands out and shaking them vigorously.  Yuuri saw why, the same moment Yurio exclaimed.

“It’s going to hit her!”

Mila had her eyes fixed on the Snitch and neither Otabek nor JJ had any hope of reaching her fast enough.  The Bludger slammed into her stomach just as her hand closed around the Snitch and she flew off her broom, suspended for a moment before falling quickly, the broom still floating in the air above.

Madam Hooch realized too late, blowing her whistle in vain.  It did no good beside agitate the crowd even more.

By some miracle, her body began to slow as it was around ten feet from the ground, but it was hard to tell if it did anything to help.  A few seconds later it was over and Yuuri shut his eyes as her body slammed onto the turf and a silent gasp escaped his mouth.

Viktor was up in a flash and was already taking the steps of the bleachers three at a time.  Yurio followed him, and as Georgi and Chris got up as well, Yuuri pushed through a group of people to make his way down.

The Headmaster was moving towards Mila and he reached her body the moment Yuuri felt his feet hit the soft grass of the pitch.

“Is she okay?” burst out Viktor.  "Why did the game continue when there was something wrong with the Bludger?  Who deemed it okay? Why didn’t anyone slow her f—”

“Calm down, Nikiforov,” boomed Professor Snape, one of the many professors who had come onto the pitch.  “Step aside.”

“Like hell we will!” yelled Yurio with such fury that Professor Dumbledore’s head turned towards him.

“Is she okay?” Yuuri felt the words escape from his mouth, unsure he’d even triggered them.  Already, other students were crowding around, and he was losing his view. A bubble of panic rose up inside of him.

Professor Trelawney had her head raised to the sky and she was waving her arms wildly, babbling something incoherently.

 _The prophecy,_ Yuuri’s heart sank.  She’d really been right.  No one had taken her seriously, saying that Mila would die.  Maybe if he’d listened, he could’ve warned her and—

“Miss Babicheva will be fine.  I need everyone out of here so I can escort her to the castle where Madam Pomfrey waits,” announced Professor Dumbledore.  His voice was calm and sure, yet everyone seemed to hear, and it stopped Yuuri’s frantic thoughts in their tracks.

“Hey,” Viktor grasped his wrist and muttered into his ear.  “She’s going to be okay. They’re not going to let us do anything.  Let go.”

Yuuri let out a breath he hadn’t known he was holding and suddenly could hear how furiously his heart was beating.

Viktor’s hand never left his wrist as they made their way up to the castle.

***

“They’re pissed.  At _me._  Of all people!   I almost _died_ and they’re mad at me!” exclaimed Mila.  It had been almost two months since the incident, which had been deemed a case of a rogue Bludger.

Although it was the beginning of class, it seemed everyone was holding their breaths to hear what Mila had to say.  After all, it was the first time she’d been back in class since that early March day. Even Slughorn was leaning in, watching their conversation with his beady, excited eyes.

“Georgi are you even listening to me?” Mila asked, and immediately Georgi looked up from his scrap of parchment where he’d doodled a heart with an arrow through it.

“We’re listening,” Viktor smiled, not like they’d all heard the story countless times in the hospital wing.

“Well they were so mad when I saw them, and I asked why.  I mean shouldn’t they be relieved?”

“And then they said ‘Why would you play Quidditch when it’s such a dangerous sport?  You need to quit immediately!’” continued Yurio with a satisfied smirk.

“Yeah, but then _I_ said—”

“‘You can pry my broomstick out of my dead hands, Mum,’” Chris finished in a high voice.

“Exactly.  Then she turned such a deep shade of green you would’ve thought she was modelling for the Slytherin team,” Mila replied in a satisfied tone.  “So be sure to watch Gryffindor’s next match at the end of May,” she raised her voice for the whole class now, indicating the story was over.

Yuuri shook his head with a small smile on his face then turned back down to his notes.  After all, he had to get his homework done tonight so he would have time for the party.

***

“Are you sure this is the right place?” asked Chris, staring dubiously at the portrait of fruit.  He watched as Yuuri tickled the pear and it swung open to reveal a firelit room.

“I told you Phichit doesn’t settle for normal,” Yuuri smiled, leading him over to the table where there were piles and piles of sweets.

“That’s right I don’t,” Phichit gave a bright grin. “You guys are the last to arrive!  Well, besides Hokey but he insisted on not sitting down with us.” He then added in a lower whisper, “I told him he couldn’t refuse the birthday boy but he still did.  The nerve…”

To Yuuri’s surprise, Chris let out a throaty laugh.

“Ah Phichit, if only we were all as good of people as you.”

Phichit turned a shade darker and Yuuri took this as a time to officially start the party.  There were only four of them, Chris, Yuuri, Michele, and of course Phichit, but they were sure to sing Happy Birthday so loudly that it would be a miracle if the whole castle couldn’t hear.  Even Hokey joined in, but from the floor.

“Thank you,” Phichit was grinning ear to ear.  “Especially to my newfound friends this year. What a marvelous birthday it has been!” And although they had had two practice exams that day, Yuuri really did believe Phichit had had a good day.  So when Phichit insisted he eat more, he devoured some cookies and rice pudding until his stomach hurt and the conversation died down.

“I’d love to stay,” he finally said as the debate of giant rights came to an end.  “But I have a massive stack of Herbology diagrams I need to annotate waiting for me in the Gryffindor common room.”

They said their goodbyes, and last Happy Birthdays to Phichit, and Yuuri finally emerged out of the kitchen and strolled back towards the Gryffindor common room.

“Hey! Wait up!”

Yuuri turned around, surprised to see JJ rushing up the stairs after him.

“What is it?” Yuuri asked, stopping so he was almost as tall as him, thanks to a few stairs.

“It’s Mila,” JJ’s face was gray.  “Her parents have taken away her broom and they won’t allow her to play.”

Yuuri wasn’t even close to processing what this meant, when JJ gave him a final, pointed look.

“You better be at practice Tuesday night.  You’re the new Gryffindor Seeker.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> forever mood is the squad trying to cover up yuuri's drunk mess lol  
> 1\. YOU GUYSSS i'm so sorry for the long and uncalled for break. if you want my excuse for not posting for over a month it's that my house got flooded and my whole family's been busy trying to deal with it (not much time to write & edit :/)  
> 2\. on a more positive note the "break" has given me a lot more motivation and i cannot wait to put out some more chapters (definitely will be less than a month before the next one is out i promise)  
> 3\. i say this every chapter but you're all the sweetest and i love getting comments and kudos and all that :') i hope you enjoy this chapter & i love you all xoxo  
>  _preview: proved me right when you proved them wrong / and in this perfect weather it’s like we don’t remember / the rain we thought would last forever and ever_


	5. you play it back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _proved me right when you proved them wrong / and in this perfect weather it’s like we don’t remember / the rain we thought would last forever and ever_

****“I heard,” Viktor said before Yuuri could spill out a single word. “Mila told me.”

“This is terrible,” he concluded. “It’s the last match of the year which means the win is relying on me.  Which is going to make me even more nervous. And I’m going to—”

“Calm down,” Viktor interrupted, always so sure of himself. “You’re going to calm down.  You’re not getting anywhere if you’re thinking like that. We’ll work through it, okay?”

Yuuri was not okay.  Thankfully the Astronomy Tower was only lit by the dim moon and stars, so no one could see the sweat trickling down his face.

“Can we meet more than once a week, then?” Yuuri took a shuddering breath, trying to adopt Viktor’s collected composure. “I’m not ready _at all.”_

To his surprise, Viktor shook his head.

“If we meet more often, then you’ll put less effort into each practice.” Yuuri opened his mouth to object, but Viktor didn’t slow.  “Besides, you’ve always been ready to win. You only lack the confidence. Sure, our time constraint just went from three years to three weeks, but it’s entirely possible.”

Yuuri’s cheeks burned.

 _Remember who you’re talking to.  Take a step back,_ his whole body begged him, and he complied, trying to match Viktor’s even tone.

“Sorry, you’re right.  I’ll er—I have to ask Otabek something,” he pointed his thumb over his shoulder and didn’t dare process Viktor’s face as he rushed away.

Three practices with Viktor.  That was all he had to prepare for the match.

***

Yuuri was paying surprisingly good attention to Professor Binns lecture on the effects of prejudice against goblins and giants in the modern world and how they stemmed from centuries ago.  That was, until he remembered his first official team practice was that night. Then he spent the rest of the hour thinking about all the things that could go wrong.

First, Takeshi and Yuuko would think he was stupid for coming to Hogwarts like them.  Then he would take so long to find the Snitch that Otabek would direct a Bludger at him and pretend not to know him.  Next, JJ would be so disgusted that he’d take him off the team and incessantly tell everyone for the next three years that he sucked at Quidditch.  And _then—_

The bell rang.

“Are you alright, Yuuri?”  This came from Michele.

“Erm, yeah,” he said in the most inconspicuous tone he could muster.  “What’s up?”

“You just looked really out of it.  I’m glad you’re the new Seeker,” he said brightly, “but I still feel really bad for Mila.”

“Me too,” Yuuri said, shoving his untouched notes in his bag.  “I mean, she won fair and square and just because of some rogue Bludger she shouldn’t have to quit.  It doesn’t seem right for me to replace her.”

“Well,” Phichit started in the sort of voice Yuuri know he couldn’t argue with.  “You’re the backup. And you won that, fair and square. So don’t feel bad.”

“Mhm,” Yuuri murmured as they headed down the stairs and turned the corner to the Defense Against the Dark Arts room.

“See you later,” Michele waved, and Phichit gave Yuuri a look.  The kind of look implying they would be talking later.

He shrugged it off and entered the classroom.

“Yuuri!  The man of the hour,” Mila exclaimed, bright as ever.  “Did I ever tell you thanks? Because I was terrified to play against Sara.  It’s almost like a blessing in disguise that my parents are being so ridiculous.  Obviously I’ll miss it, but...”

“Can you still play?” he asked, the guilt hitting him.  “Like out of games and just for fun?”

“No,” she replied dully.  “But my parents really have no way of knowing.  The games always make the back of the Daily Prophet, so that’s out.  But as long as I’m not flying with famous _Viktor...”_ She stuck her tongue out at him.  “The news shouldn’t get out of the castle.”

“Well that’s good, I suppose,” he said, although his mind was still going in circles.  “I mean, if you ever convince your parents otherwise, don’t hold back on getting the position back, because I’m, well…”

“Terrified?” she smiled.  “The people really aren’t that bad.  JJ may seem a bit, er,” she lowered her voice, “egotistical.”  Yurio snorted. “But he’s a great Captain. I mean you have to be super good to be made Quidditch Captain in your third year.  And Otabek, of course.” She glanced over at him. “Takeshi, Yuuko, Emil, and Anya are all really nice too. They won’t care if you mess up on the first practice.”

To his utter relief, he was saved from another pleading remark.

“Yuuri, Yuuri, Yuuri,” swelled Slughorn, who, once again, had crept over to listen to their conversation.  “Landed yourself a position on the Quidditch team, hm?”

“Er, yeah,” he answered, aware of the many eyes on him.

“Hmph,” Slughorn sniffed. “Well, I can’t wish you luck as my loyalties lie with the Slytherins, but we’ll see how you do.  We’ll see…”

Yuuri shot a curious glance at the rest of them, who had had Slughorn for two or three years before.

“He loves collecting people,” Viktor chimed in the moment he was out of earshot.  “The moment I got here, I got this little invite, for the Slug Club.”

“Slug Club?” asked Otabek curiously.

“His group of well-connected people,” explained Yurio.  “I think all of us got invites, although only Georgi really goes.”

“Except for his beginning of the year banquet,” grimaced Mila. “We all show up for that, typically.  I mean he’s a nice enough professor but _God,_ could he get any more conceited?”

“Why were you all were invited?”  Yuuri let the curiosity play into his voice, hoping he didn’t sound jealous.

“Well,” sighed Viktor, “we all come from pureblood families.  Nothing really bad about him, of course, he’s just got this ambition to be well respected by everyone.  It gets him benefits, too. He knows all the right people in all the right places.”

“You’re not missing out on much,” Mila shivered.

“Hey,” Viktor said abruptly like he’d just thought of something.  “Would you want to meet on Saturday for practice?”

Right.  He knew Viktor had changed the topic to make him feel better, but now he was back to worrying.

“Sounds good.”

***

“I’m sure you’ve all noticed that we have a new member,” JJ said, broom on his lap.”  “We’ve also lost Mila, but we’re still going to win the next match because we all know we have the best team in the school.”

“That’s right, JJ,” Yuuko gave Yuuri a small smile.

Otabek and Mila had been right, Yuuri decided.  Everyone was friendly enough, and JJ wasn’t raging like he’d expected him to.

“Enough talking,” the captain sighed, standing up from the bench.  “Since Yuuri’s here, we better just work on the basics. I’ll hit the Bludgers toward you,” he nodded at Yuuri’s pale face. “Otabek, you work on defense.  Anya, Emil, Yuuko, practice passing, shooting, and _communication._  Takeshi, you’re defending.  We’ll just try to create a game environment while Yuuri can find the Snitch.”

“Sounds good,” Anya lilted in her soft voice.

“Let’s go!”

Yuuri kicked off smoothly, already feeling some of the weight dropping from his shoulders.  He’d made it through the beginning, and all that was left was the Snitch and it’d be all over.  The sun was already sinking steadily, the sky on the west end of the pitch a brilliant orange. He swiveled around and headed that way, hoping the sun would reflect off of the Snitch and it would stand out against the dark sky.

“Duck!” Otabek bellowed and he swooped wildly as a Bludger cruised overhead.

“Sorry,” the boy frowned. “JJ hit that one too hard.”

“It’s okay,” Yuuri let out a breath.  “Thanks for the warning.”

They parted again and he swallowed, trying to focus again.  The sun was going lower and lower and the light was leaving.  At least no one below him was paying attention to what he was doing.  He could hear Yuuko laughing uncontrollably at something Takeshi had said, and seconds later a shout from JJ telling them to focus.

“Focus,” he reprimanded himself out loud, then glanced around to make sure no one had been close enough to hear him.

Then, his eye caught onto something moving.  It could just be JJ’s broom, but...

His heart skipped a beat and he pointed his broom farther to the other side of the pitch, begging his vision to stay fixed on the Snitch fluttering in the center of the middle of the hoop.

Seconds later, his hands clasped around it and relief poured from his body.

“Get down!” This time the warning came from JJ who had presumably just hit another Bludger at him, not realizing he’d gotten the Snitch.  But before he could act, Yuuri heard a satisfying smack of the bat and Otabek’s voice a second later.

“I got it this time,” he grinned.  “Good job, Yuuri.”

“Impressive,” JJ remarked, “especially in the dark light.  We’ll meet again on Sunday, until then, get some rest.”

Yuuri gave a nod although it was now too dark to see anyways.

“We are going to _crush_ Ravenclaw,” he heard and a smile played on his lips.

One game at the end of the year.  That was all he had to worry about.

***

“You don’t need your broom.”

Those were the first words Yuuri heard as he entered the Quidditch pitch and approached Viktor, laying on the grassy ground.

It wasn’t exactly reassuring.

But he put it down anyway, because well, he’d grown to trust Viktor Nikiforov.

“You’re here to teach Yuuri Katsuki how to fly, right?”

“Very funny.  Lay down,” Viktor patted the spot next to him leaving Yuuri no choice but to obey.

“So what are we doing?” he said a bit impatiently, turning over on his side to look at Viktor.

Bad idea.  His ocean blue eyes were enthralling in the spring sunlight.

“I’m going to give you some advice,” Viktor said calmly, placing an arm under his head and turning to look at Yuuri.

“Why?”  
“Because we’ve already established there’s nothing wrong with your Seeking skills besides your mentality.  Your practice on Tuesday proved that again.”

“I suppose.  But won’t flying help build my confidence in my physical ability?” Yuuri countered, squinting against the light.

“I’m sure you already have enough confidence in your physical ability,” muttered Viktor offhandedly.

“What?” Yuuri blinked.

Viktor turned back up to the sky.

“The thing I always do the night before a match is visualize everything going perfectly.  It’s important to be specific. For example, I’d wake up in my apartment in France and there’d be just enough eggs to make an omelet.  And maybe some red peppers. Then I would flip them at the exact right time and the pan would sizzle as I rinsed it out. I’d have some orange juice and it’d be chilly but not so cold I’d be shivering.  I would leave the apartment and not forget the keys, then run into a teammate while on my way to the stadium. There’d be no crazy reporters or fans and the captain would give the perfect speech that gets my veins buzzing.  I would take off on my right foot. First, Bulgaria would score and it would seem like they were going to win. But that would add to the suspense, and, well...you know how it ends.”

Yuuri did know how it ended.  That had been the Quidditch Cup Viktor had won for his team two years ago, the one that put his name out for everyone to know.

“Okay,” he pieced together.  “So imagine about how everything is going to fall in line.”

“Exactly.  And when you do it again, you’ll feel more confident because it’ll be like it’s the second, or third time you’ve done it.”

It made sense, Yuuri had to admit.

“When the time actually does come, get there with maybe half an hour to spare.  Enough time so you’re not rushed, but not so much that it causes extra worry. Would you like my personalized recommendation?”

A smile played over Yuuri’s lips as Viktor’s eyes danced around his.  “Sure.”

“I recommend you go with Otabek.  You’re dorm mates and he’s done it a few times before.”

“Right, I’ll see what time he wants to go,” Yuuri looked back at the sky, closing his eyes from the blinding sun.

“This one’s harder, but focus on your task rather than the outcome of the game.  Your whole goal is to catch the Snitch, but if you get so caught up in that, you’ll have trouble.  Think, _I have to get to the other side of the pitch.  I have to avoid that Bludger._ Small things.  If you set too large of a goal, it’ll be hard to get there because you’ll be worrying too much since the outcome is so far away.”

“Do you use all of those?  Or did you, when you flew?”  It was weird, talking in past tense and he almost forgot the days of posters and begging his parents to let him go to a match.  Now, when he went back, watching him would be a whole other experience.

“Of course,” Viktor replied smoothly from beside him in a voice he used only for him.  “They made me the Seeker I am. Other people have been through what you’re facing. I promised I’d help you overcome it and I’m a man of my word.”

Yuuri’s eyes remained closed, but he felt something indescribable.

Inside of him, something great threatened to burst.

***

It seemed like everything in Yuuri’s life was revolving around Quidditch at the moment.  He had hoped the homework would come to a lull by the last month of the year, but he still found himself staying up to midnight.  It was now almost halfway through May and the professors were relentless in preparing them for exams. Thankfully, there was one class he could count on not having homework in…

“You still think I’m going to die?  Was one brush not enough for you?” Mila’s voice was clear as ever and for a moment, he imagined her arguing with Death itself, protesting that she still had things to do.  Girls to ask out.

“My dear, it’s written in the stars…”

The team practices were going alright, although he still lacked the spark he needed to feel any more confident.  That, he was relying on his last two practices with Viktor for.

***

“Excellent, Yuuri,” Viktor beamed as he handed the fluttering Snitch over proudly.  “What were you thinking about while you were flying?”

“I don’t know,” Yuuri grinned despite himself.  “I just felt like I _had_ to win.  I mean, this is the second to last practice, right?  And I didn’t want to waste your time, so, something just clicked and I got it.”

“That’s the side of you I need to come out, and I’ve been trying all damn year,” Viktor elbowed him.  “Remember when you couldn’t even fly in front of me? Perfect, this is perfect,” he turned to muttering, the Snitch still crumpled in his hand.

“I still have a long way to go,” Yuuri hurried, not wanting Viktor’s expectations to rise too high.

“Of course, of course.  But progress, Yuuri! We’re making progress!”

He left practice with a light heart, bouncing every other step.   _If only I could pull everything together for the match and win.  How wonderful would that be?_  That had always been his wish, but now it seemed closer than ever.

***

“Slytherin for sure,” Mila said confidently.  “Yurio’s been practicing for _ages._  Every night I seem him down in the pitch.  Especially because they haven’t won a match yet, I’m determined he’ll win, if nothing else, by pure spite.  Imagine being beaten by _Hufflepuff.”_

Yuuri laughed and brushed off the guilt he felt towards Michele and Phichit.  He sat in the Slytherin section with Mila, Viktor, and Chris, which was already deadening his support for Hufflepuff.  Georgi had apparently started going out with Anya and was undoubtedly in the Gryffindor section with her.

“What do you reckon, Viktor?” Chris asked.

“It’s hard to tell.  We’ll have to see,” was all he said.

Mila cast her eyes up to the sky fondly.

“Attention everyone!” Madam Hooch’s voice reverberated around them and immediately people’s voices turned to whispers, trying to cram in last second predictions.

“Let’s welcome our Slytherin team…”

Yurio looked especially small compared to the rest of the team.  It was only in times like these that Yuuri remembered he was only a third-year student.

Once the Hufflepuffs came out as well and the captains shook hands, Madam Hooch began to unravel a long-winded explanation of the points.

“This is the last game these two houses will be playing this year.  Hufflepuffs have 180 points and Slytherins are at 130 points. Ravenclaw and Gryffindor are leading this year, at 490 and 310, respectively.”

“That means you have to catch the Snitch when we’re no less than forty behind,” Mila whispered in his ear.

“However, if the game was stretched out and each side had more than three hundred points, it’s possible one of them could take the win, very much like the phenomenon in the World Cup of 1872.  But, we mustn't get ahead of ourselves. To our Hufflepuff captain, Nathaniel Lester, and Slytherin Chaser Bruce Timber, who are both graduating this year, best of luck to your last game.” She spoke fondly towards the two tall boys dressed in yellow and green, but the applause was only polite.  Everyone was on edge, waiting for the game to begin.

“Without further commentary, let’s start in three, two, one!”

Yurio shot off so quickly that Yuuri saw him fifty feet in the air after a single blink.  He was a whir of emerald, making the rest of them look like sitting ducks.

“He needs to slow down,” muttered Viktor.  “And stop showing off.”

“Do you think he’ll get it at that rate?” Mila asked. “I mean he has a nice broom but he seems more focused on looking good than actually catching the Snitch.”

“Exactly,” Viktor sat back like the game was already over. “I’ve told him a _thousand times_ but he _never_ listens.”

Yuuri, however, was on the edge of his seat, eyes glued to the sky.  He had to observe everything he could to prepare for the match looming within two weeks.

“Slytherin scores!” Madam Hooch cheered with delight.  “And Eliot’s got the Quaffle again. Oh! Crispino better watch out up there, he’s got a Bludger on his tail.  But ah, looks like someone’s taken care of it…”

“If Yurio just keeps Sara’s brother from getting the Snitch for long enough, it looks like his team will cover the points,” Mila huffed.  “But _of course,_ he’s trying to find it and paying no attention to the other Seeker.”

“How much experience does he have?” Yuuri asked. “I mean he must be pretty good to have made it in his third year, but you two seem to have a lot of criticism for him.”

“He’s good,” Viktor replied shortly. “But too focused on his performance so he doesn’t end up doing well.  Similar, but also a polar opposite from you. He ends up wanting to look good and shows off too much. As soon as he can tone it down and use his skills for the better, he’ll be great.”

“Trouble is, he never listens to us,” Mila shook her head. “Which I get, like, three years ago, but he’s fourteen now.  You’d think he’d have gotten over his rebellious phase.”

“I don’t know,” Chris said deliberately casual. “He listens to me.”

“Only because you enlighten him with your curious behaviors,” Viktor replied drily, then straightened, casting Yuuri a look of appreciation. “Wow, Yuuri.  That was a good shot from your friend!”

The crowd seemed to think so too, with exception to the Slytherins.  Phichit had shot the Quaffle right through Rook’s legs. His smile was blinding even a hundred feet away.

“He’s been practicing a lot,” Yuuri smiled. “I’m glad it’s paying off.”

“Ninety-twenty to the Slytherins!” Madam Hooch announced, her voice picking up. “Chulanont’s been the only one to score so far on the Hufflepuff team.”

“How’s Michele at Seeking?  He made it last year, right?” Chris gazed at the field like he was picking his next prey.

“He’s good.  I haven’t really seen him besides in the games, though,” Yuuri admitted, and their attention fell back on the match at hand.

He’d forgotten about Iris, but it seemed she was scoring shots one after another.  She flew almost without using her hands, guiding the broom with her thighs and tossing the ball towards the goal without hesitation.

The Hufflepuff Keeper, a young girl called Rosaline Lin, was furiously trying to block them, but the lightning fast work of the Slytherins nearly threw her off her broom a few times.

“Eliot is passing to Timber, and _yes!_  What a beautiful throw there!  Nice try Lin, nice try…It looks like Plisetsky and Crispino are still searching for the Snitch, but there’s a lot of Bludgers following them around.  Where are the Beaters? Oh, and Hawes scores! One-twenty to thirty, Slytherin’s in the lead, still.”

Yuuri focused his attention towards the Seekers, studying how they acted.  They seemed to be doing the same thing he was usually doing, except Michele was diving, and—sure enough, the Snitch was glittering below at the foot of the hoops.  Yurio just seemed to notice this and with no dignity held back, he pointed his Nimbus 2001 directly at Michele, accelerating at an alarming speed that tested even the nimble broom.

“He’s so _stupid,_ so _stupid!_  He’s going to hurt himself!” Mila gritted her teeth, eyes flashing.  Yuuri didn’t doubt she would hex him for not being more careful the second the game was over.

There was a deafening roar that shook the stadium, and for a second Yuuri thought Michele had caught the Snitch.  But with his vision blocked as everyone rose to their feet, he had no idea what was happening.

“Penalty!  A dirty, foul, loathsome, attempt to sabotage the Hufflepuff Seeker!”

To Yuuri’s surprise, Chris was laughing as everyone settled back down and he finally saw the heap of green and yellow where the Snitch had once been.

“What did he do?!” Mila exclaimed, furious.  She too had been too short to see the action unfold.

“Grabbed onto the end of his broom and swung him around,” Viktor said, struggling to keep a straight face.  “I mean, it wasn’t very smart, but at least it worked…”

“Chulanont’s free to take the shot, yes, that means _away_ from the hoops, Rook,” Madam Hooch snapped.

“C’mon Phichit,” Yuuri whispered under his breath, terrified if he said it any louder he’d be devoured by the angry-looking sixth years in front of him.

Seconds later, Phichit shot cleanly through the hoop on the far right and the Slytherins groaned in unison.

“Very well, very well, that’s one-twenty to forty, in favor of Slytherins.  Now Timber has the Quaffle again, and—good save, Lin, not sure if it was an accident, but it was a good save...”

“That’s all the penalty there is?” Yuuri asked in speculation. “Ten points?”

“It allows for quality entertainment,” Viktor allowed with a small smile. “You haven’t lived until you’ve seen a dirty game of Quidditch.”

“Remember in our second year?” Chris asked, and it seemed they all knew what he was talking about because Mila doubled over, laughing.

“Madam Hooch’s face was a shade of red that could rival the Gryffindor uniforms.  She was blowing her whistle at least every ten seconds—”

“And then the Gryffindor and Slytherin Seekers had a wrestling match _on their brooms_ as they fell!”

“What happened?” Yuuri could only imagine what would happen if that had been him.

“They both hit the ground pretty hard and Madam Pomfrey had to take them to the hospital wing,” Chris grinned. “Then they continued the game a few days later when they’d both recovered and Slytherin caught the Snitch within the first minute.”

“They were both in their seventh year,” Mila said admirably, “I think they were friends just trying to get a laugh out of their last year.”

“Hooch was so mad.  Said it ruined the spirit of Quidditch and it was going to give us a bad reputation,” Viktor sighed dreamily. “But if anything, it made it even more popular.  Everyone talked about the match for months, and the pitch was so full with new people who wanted to play after hearing about it.”

“That was when I started,” Mila said fondly.  “If only I could still play…”

Yuuri wasn’t quite sure what to say in response to that but was saved by a sudden swoop from Michele.  Before he knew it, the boy came back up, his hand raised high in the air clutching the Snitch.

 _“What?!”_ Mila’s mouth fell open.  “Hufflepuff won?!”

But the Slytherin team looked far from upset, they were clutching one another with excitement.

“Slytherin won!” Viktor shot up straight. “They must have been over 150 points ahead and Michele decided to just end it!  What a great game!” His smile was clear as day and he clapped with real excitement.

It was no doubt he loved everything about Quidditch.

“Poor Yurio,” Mila whispered awkwardly. “That’s the last match, and he still hasn’t caught the Snitch in his first year.”

“Maybe he’ll listen to us, then,” Viktor sighed. “Or it might just make matters worse.”

“Either way,” said Chris firmly. “Let’s go congratulate him.”

Yuuri felt himself getting to his feet and following the three of them down the quickly emptying bleachers.  The sun was starting to set and it cast a golden glow upon everyone’s face.

It was magical, he thought.

The person he was now was the person he’d only dreamed to be nine months ago when he’d come to Hogwarts.  Now all he had to do was overcome his fear and win the match.

***

Yuuri came from his second to last practice absolutely drained.  His robes were heavier than ever and it had been dark for hours. If he’d been improving before, the match was so close now that his performance was only declining in the team practices.

They had done the same thing as his first team practice, except it had been so hard to focus, especially since he’d just been studying for History of Magic and found himself slipping away from the Snitch and instead thinking of the influence of the goblin wars.

JJ had been infuriated and hadn’t held back in yelling at them all, although from the overcast looks of the team’s faces, Yuuri knew it was his fault.

Now he was headed towards the dark room where he paced a few times and then threw the door open with relief.

“I didn’t think you were coming.”  Viktor sat alone at the desk, a stack of parchment and open textbook in front of him.

“Sorry,” he said, the guilt hitting him.  “Practice took forever. I can help you study now, if it’s not too late.  You’re on the Chinese Revolution, right?”

“Nonsense,” Viktor stood up.  “I’m just finishing up the essay.  And you need to get some rest.”

Yuuri wanted to protest, but his body gave way and he slumped against the door in defeat.

“Hey,” Viktor said reassuringly.  “I’ll walk you back to the Gryffindor tower.  Tomorrow will be better, okay?”

_I hope so._

***

Viktor was right, as always, it seemed.  After a long bath that morning and fresh clothes, he felt much better.  There was only one more practice with Viktor, starting in just a few minutes.  And as he munched on a bagel Otabek had left him on his bed while walking to the pitch, he recalled making the deal with Viktor at the beginning of the year.  How nervous he’d been, in shock of meeting the person behind his favorite poster boy.

Now it was his last time he would receive a lesson from him.

The match ended indicated their deal was over.  If he won, Viktor would have succeeded in teaching him and they’d be done.  But even worse, if he lost, he would be proved unteachable, and that would be that.

All he needed was one last, quiet session with Viktor to prepare him for what was to come.

Instead, he was met with a crowd.

“Phichit?” Yuuri asked in disbelief as the figures came in view.  “What are you doing here?”

Lined up with their broomsticks was a group of people he’d grown to know well over the year, and in the middle, Viktor.

“Hey, Yuuri,” he greeted, eyes sparkling.  “I thought the only way to prepare you for a match would be to have a match of our own.”

“A—a match of our own?” he gaped at them as the pieces fell in place.

“Team one will be yours.  Your Beater will be Otabek, Yurio will Keep for your team, and Phichit and Chris will be the Chasers.  Unfortunately, we didn’t have enough people to get three Chasers,” he grinned sheepishly. “The second team will have Georgi as a Beater and Mila and Sara as Chasers.”

“Mila!” Yuuri beamed, “You got your broom back?”

“I worked it out with my parents,” she explained, snuggled up close to Sara, the pretty Ravenclaw with long, full hair. “They decided to give me an exception to help out a friend.”  Yuuri was surprised Sara had shown up, considering he had to play against her for the real match.

“I’ll be the Keeper and Michele will play against you as the Seeker,” Viktor finished proudly.

Michele didn’t look too pleased, although Yuuri had a tugging suspicion it was because Sara was so close to Mila, not his position on the team.

“Erm, thanks everyone,” Yuuri said a bit shyly.  “This is really great.” He felt overwhelmed with something warm, perhaps because he’d never imagined he’d have so many people show up to something for him.

“Alright!” Viktor clapped his hands together excitedly.  “Let’s get started!”

Yuuri flew into the air, delighted at the way the wind pushed back his hair, the frames of his glasses pressing into his skin.  He flew a few safe feet above the hoops and decided to pause and watch what was going on below. It was probably the only time he’d feel truly relaxed during a Quidditch game.

Otabek hit a nasty Bludger right towards Viktor with an apologetic smile, but at the same moment, Phichit threw the Quaffle towards the lower hoop where Viktor dodged, just barely blocking it.

“Are you kidding me?” Chris yelled angrily, hovering on one side of the pitch.  Yuuri had forgotten some of them weren’t Quidditch players, yet it seemed they were all giving an effort.

“I’d like to say that was on purpose!” Viktor turned his Firebolt back around with such ease Yuuri’s eyes bulged from his head.  He was watching _Viktor Nikiforov_ play a match of Quidditch right in front of him.  That was still hard to grasp sometimes.

“Heads up Yuuri!” Mila threw a hand over her mouth instinctively as Yuuri moved just in time, feeling the Bludger Georgi had carefully aimed at him brush his shoulder.  “Sorry! I forgot I’m not on your team!”

Sara hurtled towards Mila with a smile on her face, the Quaffle in her arm and tossed it to the redhead who seemed so entranced that she only barely caught it with her fingertips.

“Watch out Yurio,” she warned and threw it with such force that as it hit Yurio straight in the chest, he flew back a few feet, carrying the ball with him through the hoop.

“Does that count?” Michele asked from a few feet away, and Yuuri spurred his broom upwards, forgetting he had a Snitch to worry about.  It was only when he had crossed the field to the other side that he realized there was a smile frozen on his face.

He paused again, this time farther from the action and watched as Viktor blocked another goal flawlessly, earning a groan from Phichit.  Chris yelled something he couldn’t hear, and Yuuri watched as a Bludger tailed him ruthlessly.

“I’m sorry!” Georgi yelled before hitting it the other way, “I know he’s not on our team!”

Yuuri laughed again, then turned his broom upwards, squinting as he searched for the Snitch in the clear blue sky.  For a second, his breath hitched as he spotted it zooming in between the posts of the stadium on his side. But...no one was watching, and Michele was engrossed in the Chasers, especially Sara, so he carefully angled his broom away and when he looked back behind him, it was gone.

It wouldn’t be too bad if the game lasted a little longer.

“Arghh!” The Quaffle flew right through the middle hoop and Phichit and Chris cheered as Viktor let out a frustrated groan, a smile still apparent on his face.

“Take that!” A second later, Mila threw the Quaffle past Yurio, earning a one-armed hug from Sara that Yuuri was sure he would be hearing thousands of recounts about within the next few class periods.

Yurio yelled something back at her that Yuuri wouldn’t dare say in front of anyone, causing a spill of laughter from everyone.  It was radiant, falling upon him too as he realized with a jolt that if he didn’t get the Snitch soon, Michele would.

The smell of blossoms filled the air as he swooped low past the side of the pitch close to the greenhouses and he saw Professor Sprout tending to a moving plant, flowers growing rapidly then dying, then regrowing once again.  Professor Hagrid, the Care of Magical Creatures instructor, was talking to her, animated with an unusually large spider in his hand.

Suddenly, something flashed across his vision and he turned his head up to a view of the whole castle covered in dark brick and vines, and there, just a few feet out of the pitch, was the Snitch, whirling in circles like it too was excited.  Yuuri headed up just as he heard a yell of celebration from Phichit and closed the gap.

And as he so effortlessly felt the laced wings of the Snitch beating in between his fingertips, he felt a tinge of sorrow, for he would have wished for that game to last forever.

***

“You’re a lifesaver, JJ,” Yuuko proclaimed, sprawled across the locker room bench, her head in Takeshi’s lap.

“Well, it’s our last practice, I want you all to get a good rest tonight,” the fourth-year said gruffly.

“Don’t worry, I’ll be in bed at eight,” Emil promised solemnly and earned a smile from them all.

“I reckon we’ve really got this,” Otabek said firmly from beside him. “We’ve done all we can to prepare and Ravenclaw won’t stand a chance tomorrow.”

JJ let out a sigh of comfort. “Sleep tonight.  Tomorrow, we’ll fly like kings.”  
“And queens,” Anya added, a smile present on her small lips.

“Right,” JJ allowed.  “Kings and queens.”

***

The cheers of the crowd were a thousand times louder when you were on the field, Yuuri decided.

The rest of the team was silent, all preoccupied with their own thoughts until Professor McGonagall opened the door a crack and slid in.

“Hello, Professor.”  It was JJ who spoke, his tone mellower than usual.

“Leroy,” she acknowledged him tersely. “The Ravenclaw team is out there waiting for you.  Whenever you’re ready.”

“I’ll go first,” JJ leapt to his feet, all energy back, gripping his broom.  Slowly, Otabek rose to his feet, then Yuuko, Anya, and Emil, and Takeshi following him.  Yuuri stood, a few fingers splayed across one of the lockers for extra support.

 _You must be a Gryffindor for a reason,_ he begged himself.   _You can do this._

If he had thought the crowd had been loud inside the locker room, he wasn’t prepared at all when the door opened and JJ flew forward.

“Remember, Katsuki,” came a voice beside him.  It was Professor McGonagall. _“Please_ don’t catch the Snitch until you’re forty points above.  I couldn’t stand it if we got  _second place.”_

Somehow, that gave him the courage to step forward, swinging his leg over the broom, his whole body numb as he gave her a nod in return.

As they flew onto the field, the cheers and boos only got louder.  Yuuri didn’t dare look to see if Viktor was watching.

This time, he didn’t need to.

“Thank you, everyone, for attending the final Quidditch match of this year.” Madam Hooch was deep in her speech, although it was clear no one could care less—they just wanted the game to begin.

The crowd cheered again as Ravenclaw flew into position.

Yuuri’s eardrums nearly exploded as Riley and Sara waved in unison.  Sara smiled, putting her head on Riley’s shoulder in sisterly affection.

“The Gryffindors have a new fourth year making his Seeking debut, Yuuri Katsuki!”

Yuuri was surprised at how many people there were cheering his name and it only made his knees shake more.

“To conclude this year of Quidditch, the final match will start on my mark...get ready!”

Yuuri swung his leg over his broom, watching as the rest of the players did the same.

“Set!”

He crouched down low, putting his weight towards the back.  He knew Sara was only flying a Cleansweep Eleven, which meant speed would be his greatest friend against her.

“GO!”

Accompanied by a collective cheer, Yuuri kicked off as fast as he could, rising to dizzying heights in a matter of seconds.  There was no point in trying to find the Snitch right away, as he had to wait until they were forty points above Ravenclaw, otherwise they’d win the match but lose the Cup.  As long as he kept an eye on Sara, he could observe the game for a while.

Aiming to slow his heart, he started lapping the pitch and watching what was going on.

He had thought the Gryffindor team would be in peak shape—and they were—but the Ravenclaw team was too.  Yuuko was racing alongside Riley Cabello, trying to knock the Quaffle out of her hands without earning a penalty at the same time.

“Out of the way Yuuri!” JJ called.

He swerved as a Bludger flew past him and sank into the arm of the Ravenclaw Beater Cuyper.  Unfortunately, she had just fired back, sending a Bludger that hit Yuuri, nearly throwing him off his broom.  It caused a groan from both sides of the audience.

“Alright there?” Otabek called and hit the Bludger towards Cabello down below, still struggling with Yuuko.

Finally, the Quaffle came free and Yuuko grabbed it, tossing to Emil, the ball narrowly dodging Ailill Zaal’s hands.  Emil threw hard, barely making it past Luca Vesely’s arm and it soared cleanly through the hoops.

“Gryffindor ten, Ravenclaw zero!” Madam Hooch cried out.  It seemed she was eager to see someone besides Ravenclaw take the Cup.

Their victory didn’t last long, for Cabello had gotten the Quaffle again and she passed it to Kolar who passed it right back, avoiding collision with a well-aimed Bludger from JJ.  As she lined up with the hoops, she threw the Quaffle with all her might, but it hit Takeshi’s chest and the Gryffindor’s exploded again.

“A worthy try! A worthy try!” Madam Hooch nearly jumped up and down with excitement.

The Ravenclaws had gotten the Quaffle again, but Anya managed to steal it from Zaal, and Yuuri imagined somewhere in the sea of Slytherin green, Georgi was beaming with pride.

“Having fun, Yuuri?” It was Sara, to his surprise, and her voice was far from unfriendly.

“It’s quite entertaining from up here.” He shot her a shy smile: “Seen the Snitch yet, by any chance?”

She just flashed him a grin then turned her broom the other way. “You wish.”

Yuuri scanned the area but still saw it nowhere, so turned back to the game below.  Right as he did, Zaal scored, barely making it past Takeshi who threw up his hands in brief frustration.

“Gryffindor twenty, Ravenclaw ten!  And Kuznetsov has already gotten the Quaffle again, but— _ouch!”_

Yuuri winced as Anya was hit square in the back with a Bludger and tumbled to the ground, a heap on her broom.  Luckily, she had only fallen a few feet and by the time she raced back into the air, Yuuko had the Quaffle and shot it right past Vesely, the Ravenclaw Keeper.

“Gryffindor thirty, Ravenclaw ten!”

Yuuri looked around, frightened.  Sara was out of his sight, so he stopped hovering and cruised around the stadium to find her.  If only he could last until they were twenty more points ahead…

His sudden movement had the crowd wild, thinking he’d seen something.  Sara must have thought so too as she came zooming out from under the bleachers only to give him a wry grin, holding up her empty hands.

“Gryffindor forty and _Cabello shoots!_ That brings Ravenclaw up to twenty!”

Yuuri risked a glance downwards and saw Takeshi rubbing his cheek in pain.  Luckily, Emil had gotten the Quaffle back and was racing down the field at breakneck speed, even on his Cleansweep Seven.  The red ball streaked right past Vesely who was preoccupied fixing a button on her robe. This performance evoked some very strong words from the Ravenclaw Captain Vardo and cheers from the Gryffindors.

 _Focus,_ Yuuri reminded himself.  They were now thirty points up, he just had to wait until— _there._ The Snitch was swooping close to the ground right below him.  Sara was on the other side of the field.

 _You could end it now,_ the little voice inside him poked, _it would be so easy...you would win the match for all of Gryffindor.  You don’t need the Cup._

 _Shut up,_ he muttered and a second later JJ moved right past him, just barely deflecting a Bludger from his face.  By the time he glanced down again, the Snitch was already gone.

“Cabello scores again! Gryffindor is still leading at fifty, but Ravenclaw is only twenty behind!” It was the most animated Yuuri had seen Madam Hooch.

Jumping up and down on the announcer’s stand, her whistle was floating so close to her face it would be a miracle if she didn’t accidentally blow it.

Below him, Anya was a streak of scarlet, dodging in between Bludgers and blurs of blue Ravenclaws.  She hurled the Quaffle towards the left hoop with solid strength and Vesely didn’t even bother to try and block it.

“She’s not the best, isn’t she?” Otabek pulled up next to him, bat in hand.

“Ravenclaw did win twice, didn’t they?” Yuuri shrugged.

“It’s their Chasers,” Otabek grimaced.  “It doesn’t matter if they let a bunch of balls in if they’re putting a lot in at the same time.  Look at them right now, they’re—”

He was off in a second, and Yuuri saw why.  Yuuko had gotten ahold of the Quaffle for what seemed like the thousandth time, but there was a Bludger following her, causing her to move away from the hoops.  But sure enough, Otabek was able to bat it away and her shot was clear as she flung it effortlessly through the middle hoop.

Suddenly, something clicked inside of Yuuri.  Gryffindor was now forty points above, which it seemed the whole crowd was trying to tell him as their screams illuminated the day.

He spun around in his broom, urging it to move forward, keeping an eye on Sara who was above him.  His brain was working on overtime, balancing between staying on the broom and frantically searching the air for the Snitch.

With a startle that almost had him tumbling off his broom, he saw Sara circle around and head the other way and he craned his neck to see where she was going.  She couldn’t have seen the Snitch already, could she?

However, her movements were far too slow and predictable for her to have actually seen it, and as she began to loop back towards him, he realized she had just been faking it.  He turned back to see where he was going and suddenly his breath caught.

The Snitch was right there, plain as day, glittering against the contrast of the stands, far below him, only a few feet away from the ground.

Sara had lined up above him, and Yuuri decided to mirror her trick.  Keeping an eye on the scoreboard and the Quaffle to make sure the score wasn’t changing, he tilted his broom up at almost a ninety-degree angle, letting a small smile spread across his face as Sara jolted upwards as well.

A second was all he needed to revolve his broom around and head back downwards, aware that every eye was on him.  He could hear Sara’s broom accelerating behind him and willed every fear to go away as he barreled headfirst towards the Snitch, nearly off the broom with his arm extended.

Everything went slow as he grabbed the Golden Snitch by the wing and the sound around him went from loud to thunderous one step at a time.  Just in time, he jumped off his broom and fell for the last few feet of his descent, tears in his eyes.

After that, everything sped up and he immediately felt hands pulling him up.  They were unfamiliar, but he took them anyway, fighting to stand as he saw JJ’s delighted expression.

A second later, Otabek, the boy he’d known as quiet from the very first day barreled into him yelling louder than he thought was humanly possible.  Then a few more thumps as Yuuko, Takeshi, Emil, and Anya surrounded them, grasping every part of him as if proof that they were connected, as if they were a team.

“WE DID IT!” JJ was crying, something Yuuri had not thought was even possible.

“We did it,” Yuuko’s voice was quieter than his, but it emitted just as much excitement as she squeezed Yuuri’s shoulder.

In the center of it all, the Snitch still hanging weakly from his hand, Yuuri let out the words he had been hoping to say all year.

“We did it.”

***

“I figured it out.” Viktor was stretched out lazily on the newest addition to the dark room, a two-person couch with an infinite amount of pillows tucked in the space between two bookshelves.

“Hmm?” Yuuri looked up, taking the tip of his quill out of his mouth and stretching his cramped hand.  He had been writing the Potions essay Professor Snape had demanded in addition to their exam for the past hour—with much help from Viktor.

“This room.  I was reading about the castle in the library yesterday and it mentioned a room that had everything you needed in it at the right time,” he rolled over to eye Yuuri, who straightened, intrigued.  “It’s called the Room of Requirement. They’re not sure but it may have been created by Helga Hufflepuff.”

“Well that’s one mystery solved,” Yuuri settled back in his chair and reached for a cup of coffee that appeared generously.  He had a million things to say, but he shoved them down. “It’s like getting closure.”

“Closure, hmm?” Viktor flicked his wand towards nothing in particular. “That’s an interesting word to use.”

“I mean, everything’s coming to an end, isn’t it?” Yuuri let out, although it was more of a question than a statement.   _Our deal is over,_ he wanted to say, _you helped me with Quidditch and now we have no reason to meet anymore._

“I suppose so.” If Viktor knew what Yuuri was hinting at, he made no inclination to answer. “But we’re still going to see each other again next year.  And we’ll have most of the same classes.”

“I guess,” Yuuri hummed, turning back to his essay with minor interest, trying to act nonchalant.

“We’ve come a long way, haven’t we?”

Yuuri looked up in surprise again, then nodded slowly.

“Yeah, I guess we have.”

“Remember the first time we met?  I thought you hated me or something, because you didn’t answer my questions and you acted so odd.”

Yuuri made a sharp noise in his throat.

“You thought I was weird?”

“Well not _weird,”_  Viktor let out a familiar laugh and it spread across the room like warm honey.  “Just different. Then I found out you were a fan and I was _still_ confused as to why you were being so cold.”

“You thought I was being cold?” Yuuri scrunched up his shoulders in embarrassment. “Oh, God…”

Viktor only laughed again.  “Well, at least we can be proud of our development.  Look where we are now.”

“Yeah,” Yuuri met his eyes.  Maybe his perception of Viktor had changed over the years, particularly in the last year, but his eyes had stayed the same.

They were just as blue as they’d always been.

***

“Pass the pus, Katsuki Yuuri!”

That was one sentence Yuuri had not expected to hear when he had applied to Hogwarts, but he did as Phichit asked, sliding the lime green bowl with a pulsating lump of plant pus towards him.

“How do you have that much already?!” Leo exclaimed, feverishly squeezing the pus out of a skimpy yellow plant.  Beside him, Guang Hong was mashing it as quickly as he could, and Otabek was digging another plant up from the dirt.

“Just get your fingers _right in there,”_ Michele grinned wickedly towards them and handed Yuuri another plant.

“I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that,” Phichit said in a sweet tone that resembled a mother’s.

“How’s it coming, boys?”  Professor Sprout wiped her hands on the plaid apron tied along her waist.

Yuuri swore he heard Michele say something along the lines of “Oh it’s coming _real good”_ but he instead chose to listen to Phichit.

“Much better than an exam, Professor,” he glowed, while beating the pulp furiously with his fist.

“I thought you might enjoy a pus collecting contest,” she beamed right back at him.  “Plus Rubeus was needing some for his Blast-Ended Skrewts. I was fairly sure they have nothing to do with pus, but he insisted it was necessary…” She moved on and immediately it was back to business, Yuuri thrusting his fingers shamelessly into the plant and scraping out any pus and throwing it into the bowl gleefully.

“Pass the pus!”

And so it continued.

***

“I think I’m going to miss this place a lot,” Yuuri admitted as he slowly folded his socks into his trunk one by one. “More than I thought I would at the beginning of the year, that’s for sure.”

“It’s grown on me too,” Otabek replied a little sorrowfully. “I wouldn’t be surprised if this castle had a mind of its own.  Make no mistake, I miss Kazakhstan like crazy, but there’s something about this place that feels like home.”

“Thank God I’m not the only one,” Yuuri smiled wistfully as he stood up to take his Nimbus 2001 and place it on top of the clothes of his trunk, letting his fingers linger on the handle. “I felt a little guilty towards my family at the thought of wanting to stay here forever.”

They finished packing at the same time, and while there was something very final about shutting his trunk and locking it shut, Yuuri felt lighter than he had at all that year.  Exams were over, and he had passed with surprisingly high marks that he would be happy to bring home to his family.

At the thought of his family, he remembered the letter he’d gotten that morning.  He had read it only a few times but already knew every word.

_Yuuri,_

_It’ll only be a few days—or maybe sooner depending on when this letter arrives—before we see you again.  Your father, sister, and I miss you and hope you learned a lot at Hogwarts this year. We’re delighted to see your marks from your first semester and hope the ones you just completed are as satisfactory.  There’s more I’d like to say, but it can wait until you’re home._

_See you soon,_

_Katsuki Hiroko_

Their concern about his exams was no surprise to him.  Because his sister was a witch, his parents had had plenty of time to figure out the Wizarding World’s system of education and made sure that Yuuri matched their expectations, wizard or not.

As for what she had to say, Yuuri had no clue, but nevertheless, it was an improvement from the last letter he’d received ages ago.

“Ready?” asked Otabek, levitating his trunk with his wand and holding the door open for him.

They made their way down the grassy hill leading towards the carriages and they met up with Phichit.  As the sun streamed down, Yuuri bathed in it, rocking back and forth in the carriages that led them to the platform where hundreds of students boarded onto the steaming red train.

***

“How were the rest of your exams?” Yuuri asked as he settled back into the cushioned seat and watched the green trees flash by.

“Good,” Phichit said between mouthfuls of a Chocolate Frog.  “I’m not sure how I did on that killer Muggle Studies test, but I’m sure the rest were fine.”

“I hope Viktor did alright,” Yuuri grimaced. “He was studying really hard.”

Phichit laughed and popped the rest of the Chocolate Frog into his mouth.  “If only the rest of us were like him,” he said before straightening up.

“What do you mean?” Yuuri tore his attention away from the trees.

“What do _you_ mean?” Phichit looked at him now, eyebrows joined together.

“I just meant I hope he did okay because I helped him study all year.”

“You _what?”_ Phichit straightened up, doing nothing to hide the look of surprise on his face.

“I mean, I’m a muggle-born, you know...I had to learn that kind of stuff before,” Yuuri shrugged and shrank into his chair a little.  Was it considered weird here to know a lot about Muggles without taking the class?

“No,” Phichit choked out.  “Not that...I mean, you’re sure he asked _you_ for _help?”_

“Hey,” Yuuri said a little defensively. “I don’t know why he did either, but yeah, I guess he just...I don’t know…” he trailed off uncertainly, then... “Is that surprising to you?”

“Oh.  I just— _oh,”_ Phichit’s face transformed between a hundred emotions within the second Yuuri stared at him.

When he spoke again, he spoke tentatively, leaning forward. “It’s not like that, Yuuri, I just meant…”

“What?” Yuuri felt the space between them growing as he leaned back trying to keep his face masked.

“I mean, well, I was in his class, and he knew everything there was to teach the second he walked in the door.”

It didn’t register at first, and Yuuri’s reaction was to say _So?_ but he let it sink in for a second before speaking.

“He can’t have...I spent _hours_ teaching him the material…”

“Yuuri, Professor Burbage had us take a pre-exam on the first day, and well, I was sitting next to him.  He finished within ten minutes and when we got them back the next class he had received full marks.”

Yuuri’s head spun, mostly in confusion.  He wouldn’t have cheated, would he? But seeing how high of standards he had to live up to with his parents, it was possible...and maybe that was why he wanted extra tutoring...so that he could learn the material before they learned it in class... _yes,_ Yuuri decided.  It made sense.  So why did his stomach feel so weird?

“Maybe you should go talk to him,” Phichit suggested, and before Yuuri could even reply, he jumped up. “Stay here, I’ll go get him, okay?”

“I—okay,” Yuuri bit his lip and heard the compartment door shut as he stared down at his feet, then back out the window.  Thanks to the reflection, he saw Viktor coming seconds before the knock, and he got to his feet to let him in.

They sat down facing one another, not saying a thing until Viktor blurted it out nervously.

“Phichit said you wanted to talk to me.”

Yuuri gulped.

“It’s really not a big deal.  He was just erm, well we were just talking about things and he mentioned you were good at Muggle Studies...” He left it off there, hoping he wouldn’t have to say anymore.

“Well, of course.  I couldn’t have done it without you—” Something in Viktor’s face registered and he sat back with difficulty. “Oh.”

“I don’t know,” Yuuri mumbled. “I was hoping you’d explain.”

“You deserve an explanation.” To his surprise, Viktor’s face was tinged with pink and for the first time since he’d met him, he was avoiding his eyes.

“It sounds really bad,” Viktor started.

That wasn’t very reassuring.  Yuuri braced himself.

“I really meant to tell you, I swear.  It’s just, as the year progressed, it got harder and harder to do, and well, there came a time, after the winter, I thought it was too late, and maybe I could get away with it.”

“Just say it,” Yuuri blurted out and looked up once again.  Viktor’s face was even redder.

“I knew the whole course back to back,” Viktor sputtered out.  “Just like Arithmancy, my parents didn’t teach it to me because it was about Muggles, but I learned it on my own anyway.  I took the class just to spite them, and I didn’t think anything would come out of it. Until I met you, at least. Or more specifically, until you helped me in Arithmancy and I saw you fly at tryouts.”

“You wasted my time,” Yuuri let out a breath, but not out of contempt. “I spent _hours_ every week helping you.”

“I just wanted to get to know you!” Viktor exclaimed, taking them both back.  “The only time you seemed comfortable around me was in Arithmancy when I asked you for help with that problem.  After I found out you looked up to me as a Quidditch player, I realized you were probably nervous because you thought I was better than you.  But when you were teaching me, it was like we were equals, and you didn’t mind so much.”

Yuuri stared at him, still dumbfounded and Viktor continued more slowly.

“I figured if I found a way for you to continuously help me with something, we’d get to know each other.  Maybe even become friends. But I knew you wouldn’t accept without something on your end.”

“Not because you’re selfish, no,” Viktor hurried on as he saw Yuuri’s expression.  It’s just...you would have felt like I was just doing it to make fun of you or something.  I know you would have,” he pleaded “So when I saw you at tryouts, I was delighted that there was something you _weren’t_ flawless at.  It was the perfect opportunity, so I offered my help in exchange for yours.”

They both let out a breath at the same time, and there was a long pause, Yuuri unsure of what to say.

Then, he laughed.

“You— _you,_ Viktor Nikiforov, wanted to spend time with me?” Yuuri gaped at him then felt his whole body light up.  “You pretended not to know an entire course so you could get to know me? And sat through enduring lessons of knowledge you already knew?”

“Please don’t be mad,” Viktor said in a small voice, although he was already sitting up a little straighter.

“I just,” Yuuri struggled to put together the right words.  “This whole year I’ve been worried about being too annoying, too clingy, and you’re telling me _all this time—?”_

“It won’t happen again,” Viktor offered, and then they both laughed, and Yuuri wanted to shout at him in delight: _are you even real?_

“I mean when you play it back, the first Arithmancy lesson, the offer so carefully crafted, it makes sense,” Yuuri looked at Viktor, glowing so brightly he felt they might both explode.

_I just wanted to get to know you._

“I thought it might,” Viktor laughed.  “Does that mean I’m forgiven?”

“I mean…” Yuuri stared at him, not sure he knew any word in the world but _yes._ It had always been a _yes_ with Viktor.

_Yes yes yes yes yes._

“You owe me double the Potions tutoring next year,” Yuuri finally managed out.

“Deal.”

The trees cleared in the corner of his eye, and he caught a look at the sinking sun.  The sky was cotton candy pink, spotted with flecks of gold and streaks of plum. Beneath, a clear lake reflected the colors, a few gulls spotting the image.

And the train moved on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hehe now that yuuri's over his insecurity when it comes to viktor they can grow a little...closer ;)  
> 1\. side note i am going to skip the summers! you'll learn a little bit of what happens in the next chapter (which will start at yuuri's 5th year) but nothing major goes on  
> 2\. omg they didn't lie when they said junior year would be your busiest year yet....i am SO sorry for not putting out chapters. you know those posts that are like "when you find a new fic but it was last updated 5 months ago"? yeah...THAT WAS ME. i promise i didn't forget about this. my first semester is ending next week so the pace will probably slow down a bit and i'll have more time to write and edit.  
> 3\. thank u if u stayed :') every time i saw a new comment it seriously made my day. i'm still working on this story i promise <3  
> preview: _there were sirens in the beat of your heart / should’ve known i’d be the first to leave / think about the place where you first met me_


	6. buttons on a coat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _there were sirens in the beat of your heart / should’ve known i’d be the first to leave / think about the place where you first met me_

****"You’ve got to be kidding me,” Phichit said, staring Yuuri down.  “You’re taking _Ancient Runes?”_

“What?” he retorted.  “I took a year of it back at Mahoutokoro, and only dropped it last year because I was worried it might be too much.”

“But you’re not even dropping Divination or Arithmancy,” Phichit gaped at him.  “So you only have two free periods?”

“I’ll—”

“Not to mention, everyone else has taken it for a year more than you, meaning you’ll have to catch up!”

“I’ll make it work,” Yuuri sighed.  “I already wrote to Professor Babbling over the summer and I’m nearly caught up.  Plus we have double free blocks on Wednesday afternoon. We can study for ages then.”

“It _is_ O.W.L. year too,” Michele said from beside Phichit.  “Which is great because there’s no more midterms, but it also means we’re not getting a minute of sleep the whole year.”

Next to him was Sara, looking very comfortable next to her new girlfriend, the Ravenclaw Chaser, Riley Cabello.

Yuuri had yet to hear Mila’s opinion on this.

Phichit shook his head, then handed Yuuri’s schedule back to him and settled into the plush seat of the Hogwarts Express still waiting to leave the station.

Suddenly, the compartment door flung open and Chris entered grandly, followed by some very familiar faces.

“Is there enough room for us all?” he plopped down next to Yuuri without a greeting and surveyed the two empty seats.

“Why don’t we just kick some kids out of another compartment?” glowered Yurio.  He had grown a lot in the past summer.

He wasn’t the only one.  Next to him stood Viktor, looking very amused.  His hair had grown out a little more and he was already dressed in his black robes that brought out the color in his face.

“Don’t forget you used to be an itty bitty third year,” muttered a familiar voice from behind them.  Viktor took the seat next to Chris, and Yurio sat down at the end, leaving Mila standing with Georgi and Anya behind her.

“I reckon you’re going to have to find anoth—” Chris started, but it wasn’t necessary.

Mila’s face turned pale as she caught sight of Riley and Sara’s hands touching.  Any trace of humor evaporated from her face as she raised her head haughtily.

“Georgi, let’s go to another compartment.” She threw her hair back dramatically, and Georgi, too wrapped up in his hand holding didn’t notice until she gripped his shoulder, pulling him away and Anya with him.

“Well this is going to be a fun year,” said Viktor.  Yuuri felt a smile spreading across his face, although he wasn’t quite sure why.  He wiped it off as quickly as it had come.

“Why the _hell_ are you taking Ancient Runes?”

Yuuri jolted back to reality.  Chris was staring at the schedule on Yuuri’s lap with a look of disbelief.

“Why does everyone seem to have a problem with that?” he retorted.  This time, he was armed with more of a rationale. “I think it’s an interesting subject and—”

“You’re crazy,” Chris rolled his eyes.  “That’s all. But hey, at least we have Defense Against the Dark Arts after lunch this year.  Having it right before lunch last year was an absolute drag.”

“Will you be in our class again this year, Yurio?” Yuuri asked, leaning forward so he could see the smaller blond on the seat by the compartment door.

But before he could answer, Viktor met his eyes and smiled.  “Even better. Why don’t you tell them the good news Yurio?”

This only made him go even redder and he folded his arms in the most offensive way possible before announcing in a small voice:

“I’ve skipped a grade.”

Viktor radiated like a proud parent.

“Now we’ll all have Defense Against the Dark Arts, Potions, _and_ Astronomy together!”

“Oh,” Yuuri flushed. “Well, congratulations, Yurio.”

“Speaking of congratulations,” Chris said.  “Is anyone here a Prefect?”

Yuuri scanned the compartment to see everyone shaking their heads.

“Are you?” Sara asked curiously.

“Nope,” Chris shrugged.  Then, on afterthought: “Mila is, though.”

The compartment filled with the clamor of the train tracks beneath them.

***

“I don’t get why it’s such a big deal,” Yuuri told Mila and Otabek at the Gryffindor table between smatters of applause.

“It’s just—”

“MacConnell, Sholto,” Professor McGonagall read out at the head of the Great Hall.

“It’s O.W.L. year and homework is already crazy enough,” Mila said.  “How are you going to have time for _fun_ stuff like parties and dating?”

Yuuri wasn’t ever quite sure what house Sholto MacConnell got sorted into because he choked on his own spit at the sound of that.

 _“_ _Dating?!"_ he yelped incredulously.

“Well sure,” Mila lowered her voice as the Omeldon, Neil’s name was read out. “Even last year there were a million girls interested in you.  And guys. If you’re into that.”

“RAVENCLAW!”

“Oh good,” she muttered. “I couldn’t stand having a kid called Neil in this house.”

“What do you have against the name Neil?” Yuuri asked.  It was a fair name if he thought so himself.

“Nothing.” It was Otabek that replied this time. “You’re just in a bad mood because of Riley and Sara, aren’t you?”

Mila’s face dropped and she groaned. _“_ _Why_ did you have to bring that up?”

Otabek shrugged, but all three of them knew he was right.

They sat through a session of “Spiros, Fiona” (Gryffindor), “Uilana, Evi” (Slytherin), and finally “Yabes, Philip” who ended up being a Hufflepuff.

When the food finally arrived, Yuuri dug in, not realizing how hungry he was until the moment he swallowed a bite of katsudon.  The warm light emitted from the candles floating overhead, the silver platters full of anything from roasted duck and scampi to eggplant parmesan and fried rice, the sound of clattering forks and knives.  The sea of black robes, the occasional ghost floating through, the smell of warm food and the broad expanse of space around. It was indescribable.

And as he and Otabek made their way up the seven flights of stairs and into their dormitory, Yuuri climbed into his bed, his limbs leaden.  At last, he was home.

***

“I love starting my mornings off with insufferable heat and death,” Mila announced as Professor Trelawney closed the trapdoor, imprisoning them all in the small classroom with the boiling fireplaces.  She, of course, ignored this.

“Today we will be practicing the art of tasseomancy,” she began, waving her wand up and down in loops, purely for the dramatic effect.

“That’s tea leaf reading,” whispered Phichit excitedly.  He already had a silver mug in front of him.

She set them to work only a few minutes later, with no greetings, as if it weren’t the first day of the school year.

“Help me out here,” Yuuri said, staring at the clump of dark leaves at the bottom of his cup.  If he looked at it straight on, it was sort of like a kite. He spotted Professor Trelawney at the table close to theirs and scrambled to look at his key.   _Wishes will come true.  Wish for something good today!_

“That’s definitely a mountain,” Phichit said.  “Er, at least from this angle. But Professor Trelawney told me to look at it with the handle on the left, so technically it’s more of an acorn.”  Lowering his voice, he leaned forward, “But just look at both and write down which one you’d rather experience.”

Smiling, Yuuri glanced at the prediction for the mountain which read _Pack your bags! You’re headed on a journey._  Deciding he much rathered staying safe and sound in the castle, he turned the worn pamphlet to the acorn, wondering how many other students had used the same book, clueless as he was.   _Unexpected gold!_ it read, _Check your account at Gringotts soon!_

He scribbled it down in relief.

“Yuuri Katsuki,” Professor Trelawney said eerily.  “Pass me that cup, would you?”

Last year she had said she could see nothing in his future and he crossed his fingers under the tablecloth, praying the same would be true again.

The glasses slipped from her nose, cracking in two on the ground, but she paid no attention.

“Ah, my boy, my boy…” She patted him on the shoulder, before spilling her insight. “A cross...it could be worse I suppose, could be worse…” And she ambled away, only stopping to quickly murmur a _Reparo_ for her glasses.

“What’s a cross?” Yuuri asked, dumbfounded, then read aloud, _“Trials and suffering.  Dark days are ahead and you are in grave danger,"_ before an “oh.”

“Don’t worry,” Phichit said, shooting quick glances back behind him. “Her prediction about Mila didn’t come true, did it?”

It was a contrast from his usual undying support of Professor Trelawney, which forced Yuuri to put the teacup down, and instead of saying _Well it came pretty close to true, didn’t it?_ he just smiled gratefully.

“You’re right.”

***

If the Arithmancy class had been considered small last year, it was miniscule now.  Professor Vector let them sit where they want and feeling much more confident than last year, Yuuri slid into the seat next to Viktor.

“Hey,” Viktor greeted him with a small smile.  Today was the first time Yuuri had seen him clearly in three months.  His quick glance on the train had only revealed his hair had grown a little, but Yuuri could see much more was different now.  His nose and cheekbones were more defined, and he was a lot taller than Yuuri remembered.

“Hey,” Yuuri said softly, then cleared his throat.  “How was your first class?”

“Spectacular,” Viktor answered grandly, then clarified to Yuuri’s blank face. “It was a free period.”

“Ah,” Yuuri tried for a joke. “Have you suddenly forgotten the whole course material for Arithmancy?”

“Unfortunately so,” Viktor laughed. “I reckon I’m going to need your help.  For the rest of the year, that is.”

It was still marvelous to Yuuri that while he’d spent every second overanalyzing Viktor’s actions and words, searching for any sign that he was tired and annoyed of him, it had been Viktor all along that had been wanting more time with him.

 _If only you had more faith in yourself sometimes,_ the little voice inside of his head told him, _maybe you’d find yourself taking advantage of time rather than worrying about everything._

But as Professor Vector started class, Yuuri caught one shy look at Viktor and decided he was quite happy with how they had turned out.

***

Yuuri found himself breathing a sigh of comfort as he entered the Defense Against the Dark Arts room, spotting the large and boisterous professor at the head of the room.  A lot had changed in one year, he decided.

“Ah, Katsuki,” Professor Slughorn waved, heads turning to look at them.  Yuuri swallowed and sat down next to Georgi whose brand new bottle of ink was nearly half empty thanks to his endless doodles of Anya on the empty pages in the back of his textbook.

“Professor,” he met his eyes.

“Hmm.” Slughorn waved his stubby hand airily, then crouched down in front of his desk with much difficulty before conjuring a stool from the back of the room. “Now, Yuuri, my boy...I thought I might ask you something…”

In between Slughorn’s dramatic pauses, Yuuri racked his brains for what he could possibly be talking about.  He recalled the conversation near the end of the last year where Viktor and the others had introduced him to Slughorn’s obsession with prize students, although he wasn’t quite sure what would qualify him as one of those now.  After all, he was the same quiet, Muggleborn transfer he had been last year. Maybe with a trace of a little more confidence.

“Yes, Professor?” he kept his eyes open and earnest.

“You see, I’ve taken a liking to you over the past year, and well, after that performance last year, I must say I’m quite impressed with your flying skills,”—there it was—“so perhaps you’d like to join me for a party next Sunday?”

“Oh,” Yuuri said. “I’ll see if I can come, but I might be busy with schoolwork and all, sir.”

Slughorn smiled jovially and patted the desk in front of him before standing up and saying, “Think about it, my boy.  Just keep it in mind…”

He turned away to talk to two Slytherin girls and Yuuri swiveled his chair around to face the rest of the conversation.

“I see you’ve gotten your first invite to the Slug Club,” Mila cracked a grin.  “Don’t worry. We’re all going so you can tag along with us.”

“We figured if we at least went to the first one, he’d stop bugging us for the rest of the year,” Chris said solemnly.

“I hate this class,” Yurio said as he slid into a seat just a few seconds before the bell sounded. “What’s the point of calling it Defense Against the Dark Arts if we barely fight anyone in it?”

Yuuri saw Otabek’s lips curl upwards and he wondered if he had the same foolish look whenever Viktor said something that wasn’t particularly amusing.

“Good afternoon, class, good afternoon.” Slughorn now stood behind the podium only a few feet away, waving his wand dramatically at the board, to reveal the agenda for the day. “I’m thrilled to have you all back here.  Yes, even you, Nikiforov. It looks like your little cousin has joined us yet again, hm?”

Yuuri didn’t need to look behind to know that Yurio was scowling at being called Viktor’s little cousin.

“Katsuki, Babicheva, Giacometti…very good to see you all again,” he trailed off, then clapped his hands together again. “Now! We must not linger too long!”

The unmentioned students stared blankly at him.

“Let’s first get the partners for this year sorted out.  At the top of the list, I’ve got Babicheva. You’re going to be with Popovich.  Georgi, did you hear me?” Georgi jerked his head up, spilling the ink all over his scarily intricate drawing of Anya’s plump lips.

“Yes, Professor,” he said, widening his eyes, shadowed with a dusty purple.

“Next, we have Katsuki and Miss Iris Eliot, two Quidditch players, is that right?”

Yuuri’s stomach turned upside down as he made frantic eye contact with Professor Slughorn who was still fixed on the girl behind him, begging him to say he’d messed up the names and it was all one very big joke.

Of course, out of the nineteen other students, he would be stuck with the one whom he had apparently made out with at Chris’s birthday party last year.

Otabek was the only one kind enough to give him a sympathetic gaze as they got up, ready to switch seats.  In fact, Viktor seemed to be too entranced in the glossary of his Advanced Defense Against the Dark Arts textbook to spare him a look.

“Hi,” Iris trilled in her slight Cyprus accent.  “How are you?”

“Erm,” Yuuri took a seat.  “Alright. You?”

“Great,” she continued with a smile on her face. “I’m so glad we’re going to be partners in this class!”

Her simpering attitude was a complete turnaround from the year before when she had been furious about his apparent denial of the previous night’s events.

“Yeah,” he said slowly, then, deciding he would rather get it out now than later, blurted: “Listen, Iris, I’m really sorry about last year...I was having a really rough morning and the memory didn’t really come back until later.  I didn’t mean to blow you off like that and hopefully we can still be friends.”

For a second, she looked taken aback and he wondered if she might be mad.  But she recovered just as quickly and flashed her teeth at him.

“That’s okay, Yuuri.  I’m sure we’ll have plenty of time to get to know each other all over again this year!”

***

“She totally likes you,” Phichit exclaimed, slamming down the pot of Mandrakes, which earned a glare from Professor Sprout.

“She might have been being sarcastic,” Yuuri said. “I mean, I was completely rude to her last year.  I can’t imagine why she would like me.”

“Definitely not,” Phichit assured him. “That just means that she _really_ likes you.  Otherwise she would’ve been over you by now, especially with that, erm, incident.”

“I think so too,” Michele added helpfully.  “Plus she said she couldn’t wait to get to know you, which basically means she wants to—”

“Boys, boys,” Professor Sprout stopped by their table, tapping her grubby fingernails on the wood.  “We haven’t got all day, now, have we?”

The problem with talking to Phichit and Michele, Yuuri realized, was that they assumed he _wanted_ Iris to like him.

They busied themselves for the next minute, enough for her to go away, before turning back to talk.

“How was Ancient Runes, by the way?” Michele asked him, picking a single leaf apart mindlessly. “Did you know anyone in it?”

“Yurio.  But we didn’t really talk,” Yuuri shrugged.  “The class itself was interesting. I really enjoyed it.”

Michele rolled his eyes like the idea of enjoying Ancient Runes was impossible.

However, Yuuri really was being truthful.  He’d been a little nervous knowing he had a some more catching up to do in the class, but Professor Babbling had been kind enough to offer a pile of books that could help him cover the remaining material.  He didn’t bother to mention the dark room, or what Viktor had discovered was called the Room of Requirement, would have all the supplies he needed and more.

It was much more interesting than Divination, as well, and there was more logic and memorization to be done rather than randomly conjuring images and prophecies out of soggy tea leaves and clouded magic balls in the sweltering heat.

In fact, his fifth year had started better than all the other years combined.  At Mahoutokoro, he hadn’t particularly enjoyed seeing anyone, rather just attending the classes.  And the year before, well, that had been a mess of being new, fretting over Quidditch, and his constant stress when he was in the same room as Viktor.

Charms which he’d had the day before, and Transfiguration which he’d had just before lunch had both went smoothly, although he was partnered up with Sara in Charms.  It would’ve been fine last year when they had been on friendly terms, but it appeared she and Mila were fighting, considering how coldly she regarded him.

If one person’s attitude had changed towards him in favor, it was Professor McGonagall who didn’t call on him once, and gave him a thin-lipped smile—practically a miracle for her—on his way out.  Last year’s match was doing him more favors than he thought.

Still, he had one more class to go that day: Potions.  And he was really regretting that he blindly went along with Viktor all of last year, now that he would have to pull his own weight with his new partner.  That, combined with Professor Snape’s dislike for any Gryffindor.

“Muggle Studies was a bore,” Phichit sighed, and Yuuri realized their conversation had been continuing without him. “I might consider dropping it, especially now that Professor Burbage keeps calling me out over the fact that I got a P on the exam last year.”

“I mean, that’s not too bad,” Yuuri winced.  “But don’t you need two electives still?”

“I could take Care of Magical Creatures,” he considered, then turned across the table to Leo and Guang Hong. “Aren’t you two in that class?”

“Oh yeah,” Leo grinned.  “Easiest exam there was. All we had to do was explain the proper diet for a Blast-Ended Skrewt to Professor Hagrid.  And he went over it about ten minutes before he asked.”

“It’s true,” Guang Hong admitted. “I’m sure you’d no problem catching up.”

“Interesting,” Phichit said, then shot Yuuri a convincing look.

“Excuse me, Yuuri,” interrupted a blond Hufflepuff girl with large blue eyes. “Could you pass me the earmuffs?”

Yuuri glanced over and handed her the earmuffs he hadn’t used at all.  She gave him a small smile and wave before heading back to her station.

“That was weird,” he muttered, then glared at Phichit and Michele: “Why are you two laughing?!”

***

Sure enough, Professor Snape’s black eyes bore into his as he announced that he would be partnering up with Yurio.  At the very least, Yuuri knew he must be smart enough to have skipped a grade.

Yurio delivered the bad news as they started boiling the water at their station.

“You better know how to do Potions because I hate it.”

“How can you hate a whole subject?” Yuuri asked patiently, his head spinning with panic as he flipped through the worn textbook.

“I just do,” Yurio replied, like it explained everything.  “So you better do the whole thing for me.”

“You have to at least try,” Yuuri winced, trying to keep his tone as quiet as possible. “I’m not very good at it either.”

“That’s because Viktor did everything for you last year, didn’t he?” Yurio smirked.

Yuuri peeked up from the Mediterranean dragonfly thoraxes he was chopping, stunned.  He wondered how Yurio had even known they were partners, given that he had still been in third-year Potions.

“He told me everything about his Potions lessons with Y _uu_ ri,” he dragged out his name dramatically, as if to widen the contrast between them.

“I mean, he definitely did most of the work,” Yuuri said carefully.  He didn’t understand Yurio. Sometimes he felt like they were the same age and could actually be friends, but other times he was the little rich kid who sneered at every chance he got.

“I guess he always does, anyways,” Yurio finished, and he was back to the Yurio that Yuuri had grown to know piece by piece.

Taking advantage of the subject change, Yuuri guided their talk away from Viktor, which was becoming increasingly uncomfortable as he wasn’t quite sure what their relationship was.  Was Viktor more of a father figure? Certainly not a brother, otherwise Yurio would act a little kinder, at least.

“What electives are you taking this year, Yurio?” he asked kindly.

“Study of Ancient Runes, Arithmancy, Muggle Studies, and Care of Magical Creatures,” Yurio shrugged, stirring the Potion.

“All four?” Yuuri gulped. “That doesn’t leave you with much free time, does it?”

“You’re only taking one less than that,” he huffed. “So why are you acting like it’s a big deal?  I’m not a kid anymore.”

So that was it, Yuuri realized.  With all the news of him skipping a grade, all the teachers and students must have been treating him like he was less capable.

For the second time, he decided to change the subject to lessen the stiffness in the air.

“How’s Quidditch, then?” he tried again, dropping the cubed dragonfly thoraxes into the boiling water.  Steam rose almost immediately and he checked the book immediately to make sure he had done it correctly.

“Why do you care?”

Yuuri cast his eyes up to the arched ceiling and sighed loudly, although he was sure it couldn’t be heard over the steam.  Defense Against the Dark Arts with a girl he’d humiliated, and now Potions with an angsty teenager who refused to hold a conversation with him.  What was next?

***

“I’ve decided upon a new training drill for us,” JJ spoke boldly, as always.  He was standing in the middle of the field with his broomstick in one hand.

“You _do_ realize whatever hell you’re about to put us through, you have to go through too, right?” Yuuko complained.  She was sitting on the grass, her head on Takeshi’s shoulder. His hand ran through her fine hair slowly. He wondered if it was weird for them to take orders from someone who was two years younger than them.

“It should be no sweat for me,” he puffed out his chest, the shiny Quidditch Captain badge on his robes.

“JJ, it’s our _first_ practice,” begged Anya.  “And we got the Cup last year anyway, so why can’t we keep our old training regimen?”

“First of all.”  He pointed at Yuuko and Takeshi, beckoning for them to stand up.  They obliged grudgingly. “Losing will have only made everyone else even more determined.  We’ve got to get the Cup this year, otherwise everyone will think it was just a fluke.”

“You have a point, I guess,” Emil admitted, and that settled it.

Their task was to walk with their broomsticks between their legs at a squatting position, all the way down the length of the Quidditch field and back twelve times.  Unfortunately, Yuuri’s legs were on fire by the time he made it halfway down once, and Anya actually collapsed two laps in, earning a noise of disappointment from JJ.  Emil and Yuuko fell out at around the same time as Yuuri who accounted making it four and a half laps only due to his history of dancing and the various thigh exercises he practiced then.  Otabek only made it a few more meters before he too gave up, rolling over on his back.

Even a very red-faced JJ conceded after six laps, still insisting that it would help them all the way back to the locker room.  Takeshi followed behind, drying his sweat-soaked robes with a flick of his wand.

“Next time—” JJ heaved.  “Next time—we’ll go—a little—a little further.”

As they gathered their broomsticks with leaden arms, Yuuko rolled her eyes.

“What’s the point in practicing for Quidditch without actually flying?”

Maybe if JJ had had enough energy to respond, he would’ve said something about having the muscle to maneuver between players.

To everyone’s relief, he didn’t.

***

Yuuri wasn’t quite sure why he and Viktor were in the Room of Requirement, but he wasn’t complaining.  The room had changed a little from before, and although it was still the same size, there were now two windows overlooking the lake and the Quidditch pitch.  The size of the bookshelves had severely reduced and the couch was a little bigger, leaving the desk and two chairs the main workspace.

The candles from the ceiling were now gone, and the light came from the window, making the name ‘dark room’ now inappropriate.  Thus, the proper name, the Room of Requirement, had stuck.

Viktor was currently engrossed in a book dedicated to purely the number seven, which Yuuri figured was some Arithmancy homework he hadn’t gotten to yet as he was currently swamped with the extra Potions essay he’d been assigned at the failure of completing the potion in time.  Although he was supposed to be working on it with Yurio, he much rathered to do it by himself.

“Viktor?” he asked, and Viktor’s head jolted up, his hair covering his left eye.

“Hmm?” he picked up a scrap of parchment laying on the armrest of the couch and closed the book. “Is that Potions?” he asked eagerly.  One desperate nod from Yuuri with a side of sad eyes was all it took for him to leap up and sit down across from him.

“We didn’t learn any of this in class,” Yuuri protested, pointing towards the first question that was supposed to guide his essay.

_Explain what malfunction would cause the Draught of Peace to take on a smell of lilacs rather than the intended achievement of delilahs._

“Hey, this isn’t too bad,” Viktor reassured him in a voice that he practically melted in.

“I don’t even know the difference between lilacs and delilahs,” Yuuri sighed, “and definitely not what they smell like.”

Viktor tapped his fingers on his chin for a second, then a smile spread across his face and he waved his holly wand.  For a second, nothing happened, then two flowers appeared out of nowhere.

“Wow!” Yuuri exclaimed, his eyes boring into where they had come out of thin air.  “That’s N.E.W.T. level Transfiguration, isn’t it?”

“Of course it is,” was all Viktor said and held the two flowers to him. One had four petals and was a light purple color, presumably the lilac; the other was dome-shaped, the center a deep orange and spreading outwards to a pale yellow.

Yuuri took a tentative smell of both, a smile stuck on his face while he did so.  The lilac was a little sweeter, the delilah a bit more pungent.

“Okay,” he said slowly, “I think I can tell the difference.”

“Ah,” Viktor said and set the flowers down on the table. “I suppose that doesn’t really help.  It seemed really impressive in my head. Let me just tell you the answer.”

Yuuri laughed, his head warm and dizzy—from the flowers, he told himself—then turned the paper towards Viktor so he could read it.

“Let’s see,” Viktor hummed softly.  “Well usually buckthorn is an effective mimic for delilah, and considering that’s added in the third step of the Draught of Peace, I’d say that’s the one you would replace.  However, I doubt we have many unicorn horns in stock, so is that really the answer he’s asking for? Of course, only a pinch would be needed but…”

Finally, after sketching out several scenarios with Yuuri’s quill, Viktor handed the paper back to him.

“It’s brilliant, really.”  His cheeks were bright with excitement.  “I mean he should’ve taught it to us before expecting you to do this level of work...I would have expected him to at least give you someone to work with, but really, it’s fascinating…”

He launched into an explanation that made absolutely no sense to Yuuri, so instead, he focused on the way he talked, barely moving his lips until he reached the rolling Rs.

“Does that make sense?” he asked and Yuuri blinked once.  Twice.

“Not really, but I can look at the notes later,” he said a bit sheepishly.  “Thanks.”

Viktor grinned.

“Any time.  And well, I couldn’t help but notice, is that an assignment for Charms?  If you wanted some help…”

In that moment, Yuuri swore Viktor could’ve asked him to jump into the Great Lake or ride a hippogriff and he still would’ve somehow wound up saying yes.

***

“Remember.  We’re going to _crush_   them,” JJ yelled, standing on top of the locker room bench. “We’ve got the _best_ Keeper in the world.  Yes, you Takeshi. Not to mention, three _smashing_ Chasers.”

“Aw, JJ,” Yuuko pretended to fan herself. “I’m flattered, but be careful saying that to Anya.  You wouldn’t want to have to have a talk with her scary goth boyfriend.”

Anya looked as if she were about to interrupt, although there was really nothing to correct, so she just allowed a small smile to play across her lips.

Ignoring them, JJ continued, using his broomstick as a staff, “Of course, we have Altin, who always gets the Bludgers that I can’t.  And I’ll never forget the time he hit a Bludger _at_ the Quaffle and intercepted it from going through,” he shook his head proudly. “And _Yuuri,_ where do I even start…”

He was saved from whatever JJ had to say, as Professor McGonagall opened the door, letting in the cold, early November wind.  The sound from the stands bled into their ears as she beckoned them forward.

It grew louder as they went out onto the field, Yuuri’s fingers shaking slightly as his feet hit the grass, each thud of his heart bringing him one step closer to the center of the pitch.

 _If you hadn’t spent so much time doing other things, maybe you’d be more prepared for the match._ The little voice in Yuuri’s head was starting to annoy him more and more each time it made an appearance, so he stuffed it behind all his other worries, instinctively smiling as his name was announced.

Only a few seconds later, he had mounted his broom and waited for Madam Hooch’s command as she introduced the players.  He spotted Yurio at the end of the line of emerald green and prayed things wouldn’t be awkward during Potions no matter the outcome of the match.  Or rather, more than awkward than it already was.

He must’ve missed the signal to go because it took seeing a blur of red next to him take off for his leg to reflexively push off the ground.  It carried him steadily into the air, although he was still a solid twenty feet behind the others. An extra push of his broom leveled them out and he carried himself farther, a safe few hundred feet into the sky, wincing in embarrassment.

JJ had told him to catch the Snitch the moment he saw it, not wanting to drag the game out too long.  This made his job easier, although it also meant he had to focus, which was extremely hard for him to do when he had so many thoughts festering in his mind.

“A fresh start from Eliot, and the Quaffle makes it through the hoop! Ten points for Slytherin!” Madam Hooch announced.

Yuuri took a quick look downwards.  Embarrassingly enough, he’d forgotten about Iris completely.  However, it seemed she was doing well enough on her own, and had the Quaffle again.  This time, she was blocked by Takeshi, earning a groan of sympathy from most of the stadium, only the Gryffindors cheering loudly.

A Bludger whacked Yuuri hard in the shoulder and he dived to the left, hearing from behind him, JJ’s apologetic voice.

“Sorry, sorry, he hit it too fast at you…”

“It’s okay!” Yuuri called back over the wind, then set back to work in finding the Snitch.  He cruised around the pitch a few laps, passing Yurio only once. Slytherin was at thirty points now, and Gryffindor at ten, which was only stressing him out more.

Last year, everything had been in slow motion and every second of his time had been poured into preparing for the match, but now he quite literally didn’t have the time.  Not only was there extra homework from his extra class, but it was O.W.L. year like Phichit and Mila had been so kind to remind him.

The professors didn’t seem to possess any drop of sympathy, and the work piled on faster and faster.  There was a point where he fell asleep writing one of the three Transfiguration essays assigned on the same day and seriously debated dropping all hopes of getting an O.W.L. in that class.

“Watch out, loser,” growled a voice a few feet from his face and he jolted into the moment again, observing Yurio speeding past him.

At first he thought there was a Bludger coming towards him, but he spotted both of them down by the Chasers.  Then, he watched Yurio crouched low on his broom, hand outstretched—

Yuuri gulped, throwing all of his weight towards the front of his broom and urging it forward, but he knew there was no hope.

Yet Yurio looked behind him and met his eyes, then straightened on his broom, guiding it the other way.

 _He was faking,_ Yuuri realized with a rush of relief.  It might have been a blessing in disguise though, because he spun around in newfound frustration, and his nose hit something cold.  Blinking furiously, he jetted his broom backward and reached up easily, grabbing the Snitch hovering by his face.

For a second, it seemed no one even saw him and he wondered if he was actually going crazy.  But then, he saw the arms raise from the Hufflepuff section, easily spotting him, then it spread and people started making noise, some of anger from the Slytherin section, and then applause and yells.

Yuuri hovered for a bit, and yet even as he turned his broom on autopilot to cruise back down to the center of the pitch and Madam Hooch’s whistle sounded, he felt numb.  He had been lucky, and that was all.

Cheers upon cheers erupted, steadily growing, as if they saw him as some hero who caught the Snitch within the first twenty minutes.  Cheers upon cheers that he didn’t deserve.

***

“Well, I thought you were pretty good,” Viktor said surely, scribbling out the properties of Wolfsbane Potion on a piece of parchment.

Yuuri shrugged.

“How’s Yurio?  He wasn’t in Potions,” he grumbled, then under his breath, “which, of course, earned me extra homework, again.”

“Sulking over the match,” Viktor sighed, spotting Yuuri’s face. “Oh, don’t feel bad.  It’s all he ever does these days. I thought he was over his _I hate everyone_ phase, but it appears he was just getting started.  Can’t even hold a conversation with him these days.”

“Do you reckon it has to do with skipping a grade?” Yuuri dropped his quill in resignation. “I noticed he felt like I was treating him like a little kid.  It got me thinking maybe that’s all the teachers are doing now.”

“Maybe,” Viktor shrugged.  “Or maybe it’s because of Quidditch.  I mean, he hasn’t caught the Snitch once since he became Seeker.  I’d say it’s a combination of his fault and bad luck. I mean, he doesn’t have the best technique, but you’d assume he would have caught at least once by now.”

“That makes sense,” said Yuuri.  “Or maybe he just feels stressed socially.  All of his friends are older than him.”

“Wouldn’t that just make him feel cooler, then?” Viktor rolled his eyes. “Kids are so difficult to understand.  And pesky.”

“He’s only two years younger than you,” Yuuri smiled.

“Exactly,” Viktor finally looked up, setting his quill down in satisfaction.  “Practically a baby.”

Yuuri shook his head in amusement.  Why was it that everything Viktor said these days was making him smile?

“Anyway, I just hope he’s not beating himself up about it too much.” Yuuri caught a glance at the clock and began to pack his bag.  He’d promised to meet Phichit for the second half of their free period.

“For a reserved person, you seem to care a lot about other people’s feelings,” Viktor said from his chair just as Yuuri stood up, slinging his bag over his shoulder.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” he asked.

“It means,” Viktor followed his pursuit, getting up onto his feet and walking him to the door. “You’re telling me about how Yurio shouldn’t stress out too much about missing the Snitch, and yet you’re the one talking yourself down because you _almost_ didn’t catch it.  Maybe you should take your advice sometimes.”

Yuuri stared at him, unsure of what to say.  His eyes were flaring blue.

He cleared his throat.

“I have to go.”

Viktor took a step back.

“Okay.”

“Okay,” Yuuri repeated back to him and opened the door, stepping outside.  A moment later, he blurted out quickly, “To see Phichit, I mean. I promised I’d study with him.”

Viktor tilted his head slightly, the strands of grey hair caught on his nose, crevices of his left eye showing through.  A slight wind swept through the corridor, and Yuuri bit his lip.

“I know,” Viktor said after an insufferably long amount of time. “You told me.”

“Oh,” Yuuri said, shifting his bag on his shoulder.  “Well bye, then.”

Viktor raised his hand slightly and gave him a wave, the only prompt Yuuri needed to skitter down the halls, through seven flights of stairs and towards the kitchens.  It didn’t hit him how tense he was until the portrait of fruit tilted open and the warm air and smell of food wafted over as he climbed in. The stress diffused even more as he spotted Phichit sitting and talking to a house elf who hurried away as soon as he saw Yuuri enter.

“Sorry I’m late,” Yuuri apologized, dropping his heavy bag on the ground. “I got caught up in things.”

“Let me guess,” Phichit rolled his eyes with an amused expression that Yuuri couldn’t quite figure out. “You were with Viktor.”

Yuuri pulled out his History of Magic textbook, then paused, face under the table.

“How’d you know that?” He let the book fall onto the table.

Phichit’s lips pressed together in a smile that seemed like a secret just for them, except this time, Yuuri happened to not be in on the secret.

“Nevermind that,” he leaned forward and lowered his voice, although Yuuri doubted the house elves would be those to listen into gossip and spread it. “Just tell me one thing.”

“What?” Yuuri pushed up his glasses that were falling off his nose.

“So you and—”

“Why is it so hot in here?”

The portrait swung open and Michele emerged, dumping his bag on the table next to them.

“That would be because of the massive fireplace,” Yuuri replied drily.  He winced at how it came out, and blamed it on his stretched curiosity at what Phichit had been trying to say.  He would just have to remember to ask him what he was going to say later.

“I forgot,” Phichit said loudly. “It’s okay that I invited Michele to study with us, right?”

“Of course,” Yuuri smiled, any frustration gone.

“Great!” Phichit said. “Anyways, I’ve been meaning to ask this since last class.  Do any of you guys know what the significance of the International Warlock Convention of 1289 was?  Because I swear the moment Professor Binns mentioned warlocks, which was about two minutes into class, I thought of this _fantastic_ daydream plot.  Actually, do you guys want to hear that instead?”

Yuuri set down his quill with a smile.

“History of Magic can wait,” agreed Michele.

“Excellent,” Phichit replied, sitting back.  “So it all started when he mentioned the Medieval Assembly of European Wizards.  Now the only word I remembered was Medieval, but you see, it got me thinking…”

***

Yuuri wasn’t really sure what he was expecting from something called the Slug Club, although _this_ certainly wasn’t it.

“Am I overdressed?” Chris asked casually, leaning against the banister of the staircase.  He was dressed in ruffled green dress robes that Yuuri swore no one could pull off except for him.  Even that was questionable.

Viktor wore only a plain white dress shirt but his hair was styled more than usual and he looked effortlessly breathtaking.  The corners of his lips turned up as Chris spoke and he met Yuuri’s eyes for a second, then looked away.

“I think you look great,” Mila said in a serious voice but her eyes sparkled as she ushered him down the stairs.  She was in a gold dress so short that Yuuri wasn’t sure if she was trying to intimidate or attract a date that night.

“Where’s Georgi?” Yuuri asked, then on second thought, added, “And Yurio?”

“They’re both not coming,” Viktor rolled his eyes as he jumped over the trick step. “Georgi because he wanted to spend time with his beloved Anya, and Yurio because he’s a little shit.”

Mila gasped, horrified. “He is _not.”_   Chris roared with laughter, attracting glances from a group of first and second-year girls who were dressed in sweaters and leggings, clearly not on their way to Slughorn’s event.  Two girls looked at each other and blushed deep red, then the whole group scurried away when they saw Yuuri looking at them.

“We look a bit out of place, don’t we?” Yuuri asked nervously. “I forgot not everyone knows about Slughorn’s parties.”

“Don’t worry, Yuuri,” Chris patted him on the shoulder.  “You’ll get used to the fame soon enough.”

A few more minutes of walking and they passed the Defense Against the Dark Arts room, then kept going down the hallway, the flickering candles the only source of light.  Viktor, who was leading the way, stopped at the end where there were double doors, a slithering snake protuberance crossing between the gap. He tapped his wand on the doorknob, waiting for a few seconds before it swung open on its own.

Inside was a dimly lit banquet hall, glowing green lanterns floating from the ceiling.  Most of the people were coupled off and swaying back and forth to the strangely familiar music that seemed to be coming from the other side.  A few turned to look at them as they entered and Yuuri prayed he wouldn’t see anyone he knew, feeling severely underdressed in his black dress shirt and pants.

“Don’t get your hopes up,” Mila whispered from his side.  “This is his highest budget meeting the whole year. The teacher wages aren’t great enough to host extravagant parties every other month.”

Suddenly, Viktor fell back between them, leaving Chris to lead the three of them.

“Oh dear,” he muttered, quiet enough so only they could hear.  “I think I hooked up with both of those girls this summer and it appears they’re friends.”

He nodded towards two blondes, one in a red velvet dress, a high slit cut on the side and the other wearing a frilly rose gold gown with a pearl necklace and elegant white gloves, an outfit that looked like it belonged in the twentieth century.

Mila whacked his arm disapprovingly, or so Yuuri assumed judging from the wince of pain.

Meanwhile, Chris approached both of the girls without a falter in his step, throwing a wink behind his shoulder at Viktor.

“So that’s why you were too busy to answer my letters this summer,” Mila complained as they found a table for four.

“I was doing other things, too,” Viktor protested as he grabbed a drink from the passing house elf.

“Hmm,” Mila replied, wrinkling her nose.

“How was your romance this summer?” Viktor asked in a knowing voice.  He took a sip of butterbeer, eyebrows raised over the glass.

“Don’t,” warned Mila in a dangerous voice.  It was too dark to tell for sure, but Yuuri assumed she was glaring at him, still sensitive about Sara’s newfound girlfriend.

“Why, I wasn’t even talking to you, Mila,” Viktor sniffed dramatically, then turned so he was facing him. “Any romantic escapades this summer, Yuuri?”

Yuuri was glad it was too dark for anyone to see the flush spreading across his cheeks.

“Erm,” he started.

He was saved graciously by Slughorn, wearing a robe that made Chris’s look like a tablecloth.

“You three made it,” he paused by their table, a glass of firewhiskey hovering by his chest. “Katsuki, how are you enjoying the banquet?”

 _So he can be formal when he wants,_ Yuuri thought, but instead said, “It’s very fancy.  I’ve never been to anything quite this sophisticated before, sir.”

That was a lie, of course.  Viktor’s party last Christmas had been much more elaborate.  Nevertheless, it seemed to be exactly what Slughorn wanted to hear and he hummed in approval, moving along.

Seconds later, a well dressed seventh year that Yuuri recognized as Graham Kolar, one of the Chasers on the Ravenclaw team, took the empty seat.

After eyeing Mila up and down for a plain second, he extended his hand graciously, asking if she’d like to dance.

Mila made the quickest of faces to Yuuri and Viktor before pretending to think about it, then getting up.  The two disappeared as quickly as he’d come.

“And just like that, we’ve been ditched,” Viktor sighed, downing the butterbeer. “Do you want to walk around?”

Although he didn’t, Yuuri shrugged and found his legs complying.  He followed Viktor through the dance floor, his heart beating a little faster than usual.

“Excuse me.” A girl in a dress even shorter than Mila’s grabbed Yuuri’s hand and he retracted quickly like he’d touched ice.  He saw Viktor stop to wait in the corner of his eye.

“Is your friend single?” she asked, loud enough for Viktor to hear, keeping her eyes fixed on Yuuri.

“Er,” Yuuri took a few steps back. “I’m not sure.”

She let out a heavy sigh like it was the most inconvenient thing in the world and instead of asking Viktor herself, slunk away into the crowd.

“You’re not sure?” Viktor asked, clearly amused.  He grabbed Yuuri’s hand, pulling him into the mass of moving bodies. “Don’t you think I’d tell you if I was dating someone?”  
Yuuri blushed hard, but with a stroke of bravery, retorted, “You didn’t mention any girls over the summer.”

Viktor simply smiled, taking his other hand as well and guiding them to the back of his neck.  Yuuri’s throat dried as he felt the space between the soft strands of Viktor’s hair and the cuff of his shirt.  They swayed back and forth casually, Viktor’s lithe fingers framing his hips.

Perhaps one glass of butterbeer was already too much for Viktor to drink.

“They didn’t mean anything,” he said in a low voice. “I was just having fun.”

Even if he had said it in the aim of comforting Yuuri, it only did the opposite.  It was in times like these that he remembered Viktor would be seventeen in just a few months despite only being in his fifth year.  How was he supposed to tell if anything they did was just ‘having fun’ or not?

 _Not that you’re doing anything,_ his mind reminded him and he felt his own fingers stiffen.

“You’re not...mad, are you?” Viktor asked, taking his silence as disapproval.

“No,” Yuuri said a little too quickly.   _He’s not yours,_ he told himself furiously, _he can do whatever he wants._ “Just curious.”

“You’re not upset with Mila, though,” Viktor refused to drop the topic, and they continued swinging back and forth even as the song changed. “For taking a dance when her heart so clearly belongs to someone else.  She’s not even into guys at all.”

“Oh,” Yuuri responded numbly. “I thought she was at least bi or something.”

“Nope,” Viktor laughed lightly. “She dated one guy once and decided pretty quickly they were better off being friends.  Why did you think that?”

“Dunno.  I guess I just know more people who are bi than gay,” he shrugged, although he knew Viktor couldn’t see under the dim green lights.

“Are you?”

Yuuri nearly choked, hating himself for setting up the question perfectly.  But he was rather curious and there was a fair chance Viktor would drink too much to remember anything the next morning, so...

“Are _you?”_

Viktor seemed unphased, although his fingers dug a little deeper into Yuuri’s hips.

“First my hookups, and now my sexuality? Why are you so interested in my dating life, Katsuki Yuuri?” He spoke in a low, teasing voice, but it was enough to send Yuuri back to not speaking.

After twenty seconds more of silence, besides the thrumming music and background chatter, Viktor finally spoke.

“I like both,” he said. “I’m bisexual.”

Something dangerous threatened to break out of Yuuri’s chest, but instead, he matched his voice to Viktor’s even tone.

“Me too,” he said. “I’m bi, I mean.” Not that there was anything else he would be referring to, but he couldn’t take the long silences between everything Viktor said.  At least it was a change to his quickfire, witty responses that Yuuri had grown used to.

“Hmm.”

_Hmm?_

“Dance with me,” Viktor murmured softly, pulling him a little closer and wrapping his arms around him, meeting towards the small of his back.

“I am dancing with you,” swallowed Yuuri, barely audible.

“I know,” he said, even softer than Yuuri had been. “I just wanted to hear you say it.”

***

“I’m _soo_ glad it’s Friday tomorrow,” Iris chittered. “I can’t wait to go to Hogsmeade!”  She looked sideways as if she expected Yuuri to react just as enthusiastically.

“Er, yeah,” he replied, noticing her glance. “It should be really fun, I guess.”

“I haven’t been there in _forever_ it seems,” she settled back into her chair. “Mum only brought me in August before school started, but it’s not the same as when you go with all your friends.”

Despite not ever going to Hogsmeade alone, Yuuri could see what she meant.  He couldn’t imagine the pubs and shops without bustling students, or grabbing a butterbeer alone.

“I agree,” he said a bit plainly, forcing himself to come up with more of an answer to avoid the awkward silence that she was always so eager to fill.  “I went with my friends last year and I can’t imagine going with anyone else.”

Perhaps it was the wrong thing to say, because she suddenly sat up straight, setting her wand down on their desk as a bookmark between pages 690 and 691 of _The Essential Defense Against the Dark Arts_ _,_ as if whatever she was about to say or do required all of her energy and attention.

“I actually wanted to ask you something, Yuuri,” she said his name lightly and widened her soft brown eyes.  He forced himself to look at her.

“Yes?” He put as much disinterest into the word as possible without coming off as rude.  He figured this would be a game he’d be playing quite a lot over the next year.

“You said you couldn’t imagine going to Hogsmeade with anyone else but your friends, but maybe since we’re partners _and_ friends, we could go together.  Just the two of us. Oh!” she squealed, putting her hands together. “And maybe we could go to Madam Puddifoot’s Tea Shop!”

 _“O_ _h_ _,"_ Yuuri said delicately, about to open his mouth and decline before a thought tickled the back of his mind.   _Wasn’t it all you wanted last year to be desired?  At least give her a chance._ It was right, he supposed.  Whatever had happened with Viktor that night was forgotten in the depths of the following early morning.  They had gone back to their easy friendship, and Yuuri had to wonder if Viktor even remembered anything.

So he gave her the biggest smile he could muster. “Sure, Iris.  That would be fun.”

“Great!” she beamed and this time he only felt a flash of guilt. “It’s a date, then!”

Yuuri winced at the sound of that but gave her an encouraging nod.  It wasn’t like they were actually dating or anything, and she probably just wanted to get to know him better.  And they _certainly_ weren’t going to start dating.  Maybe she’d turn out to be more interesting at Hogsmeade and he wouldn’t regret saying yes.

***

“I can’t believe you’re going on a date,” Michele sighed enviously. _“A_ _nd_ she’s a Quidditch player, too.”

“Our little boy is all grown up,” Phichit sniffed dramatically and Yuuri shook them both off laughing, but his stomach remained tight.  He wasn’t nervous, so what was it? Wait— _should_  he be nervous?

“It’s not a date,” he rolled his eyes, knowing fully well Iris had called it so.

“Yuuri!” a voice squealed and he was forced to turn around, spotting Iris.  She was dressed in a red coat with gold buttons and black leggings.

“Hi,” he replied, walking over to her.  Immediately, his mind felt blank—and not in a starstruck way.  “Er...it’s cold, isn’t it?”

“Oh yes,” Iris smiled, enraptured in him already, although it was possibly the most boring thing he could’ve said. “My hands are _freezing."_

Yuuri turned around for a millisecond to see if Phichit and Michele were still there to make fun of him, but there was just a bustle of people through the snow-lacking streets of Hogsmeade.

After a moment, he realized it was uncharacteristically silent considering he was with Iris and panicked for a second.  “Sorry, what were you saying?”

“I was saying my hand was cold,” she frowned as they made their way towards Madam Puddifoot’s Tea Shop.  “Maybe you should hold it.”

This time, Yuuri actually did choke, on the cold air, leaving him hacking up one big cough before looking at her in surprise.  Her hand was outstretched, small and pink in the November air.

“Okay,” he agreed pitifully, not sure what else there was to say.  She took his hand happily, weaving her fingers in between his. It didn’t feel really nice, if he was being honest.  Was this what hand holding was _supposed_ to feel like it?  He had a hard time believing that, seeing as it was something people enjoyed doing.

As they approached Madam Puddifoot’s, Yuuri found himself walking faster and faster, trying to avoid every look of passing students.  And when they finally stepped into the warm shop, Yuuri let out a breath of relief.

Iris finally loosened and dropped her clutch on his hand, and he in turn scanned the shop, praying there would be no one he knew around.

To his absolute mortification, he spotted Riley and Sara in the back, snogging most graphically.  They had been sitting in a two-person booth, but it appeared Sara had gone to sit on Riley’s lap, and now her hair was dangerously close to dipping into the untouched coffee sitting on their table.

“What do you want?” Iris asked, surveying the menu with vague interest.

“Oh,” Yuuri glanced up and picked the first thing he saw, an almond croissant.  Then, a terrible thought came to his mind. Was he supposed to pay? She was already digging out her purse, and he didn’t want her to go telling all her friends how he was a horrible date.

“I’ll pay,” he said quickly and she flushed, a smile in her eyes as she shut the clasp on her purse like she’d been expecting it the whole time.

“Wow, thank you,” she batted her eyes. “I’ll have a butterbeer and biscuit.”

She bounced on her feet as Yuuri ordered and regretfully gave up eight precious Knuts.  Much to his relief, they found a table on the opposite side of the shop as Riley and Sara.   The two had now resorted to moving their hands all over one another like they’d never see each other again.  Even Yuuri was starting to get sickened at the sight, and he had no feelings for either of them, so Mila’s disgust was becoming less and less far-fetched.

“So I was telling my friend, Marlene,” Iris said, and Yuuri forced himself to pay attention as he rationed small bites of his croissant. “‘I’m going on this date today.  But I don’t know what to wear!’ And of course, she decided to help me out, because that’s what good friends do,” she giggled at that.

“Mmhmm,” Yuuri said vaguely, spacing out on her glass of butterbeer.

“She told me she’d pick out an outfit for today, so once I got out of the bath, I went to my bed expecting a perfect look,” she lowered her voice, adrenalized by her own story.  “And Yuuri, it looked _terrible!”_

“Oh,” Yuuri was starting to wish he’d gotten a cup of tea too.  Not that he was particularly a big fan of tea, and not because they were at a tea shop, but more because of the fact that it would’ve given him something to do besides being bored. “Wow.”

“The buttons on my jacket didn’t even match my necklace!  My shirt was one of those ugly oversized Christmas sweaters, and I’ve never seen it before in my life.  I think she might’ve stolen it from one of our roommates,” she laughed as if this was something very funny, while Yuuri kept his eyes fixed on her butterbeer mug.

 _Buttons on a coat? Who cares about that?_ Surely all girls weren’t like this, Yuuri thought; after all, Mila was quite nice and always had interesting things to say.

“Anyways,” Iris continued, noticing his boredom.  “After we sorted out the outfit fiasco”—Yuuri made a noise in the back of his throat—“she asked me about you.”

“Oh?” She had his attention now, and he sat up straighter.  If there was one thing he wanted to find out today, it was exactly what her intentions were.

“I told her you were incredible.”

Yuuri couldn’t quite tell why he wasn’t excited.  After all, he’d been waiting his whole life to hear that type of validation, that someone saw him as more than a friend, appreciated every bit of him.  So he just rewarded her with a small smile.

“She said she didn’t quite get that,” Iris continued.  “So I told her all about it. How you make me feel.”

There was a knot in Yuuri’s stomach that was sinking lower and lower.  What had he gotten himself into? But he just tilted his head and listened.

“I asked her if she’d ever gotten excited about someone.  I just...it’s hard to explain. You know when you see someone and your whole body lights up?  And you’re not quite sure how it happened because you didn’t ever think of them in that way, really, and then suddenly everything clicks.  And after that revelation, you start to see that everything about them is perfect, even the things you didn’t like before. You know? And it just hits you hard and makes you think _wow, this person is all I’ve ever wanted.  How could I have not seen it before?”_

And somehow, he knew.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my life goal is to be straightforward as iris is lmao  
> 1\. and so we begin yuuri's 5th year! it's a rough one but a lot of things fall in place  
> 2\. i think i might be getting back to a normal uploading schedule lol. i'm hoping to get a chapter out every one or two weeks.  
> 3\. thank you so much for all your comments. i love every one of them and they keep me going. til next week!  
> preview: _didn’t it all seem new and exciting? / i felt your arms twisting around me / i should have slept with one eye open at night_


	7. light hearted joke

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _didn’t it all seem new and exciting? / i felt your arms twisting around me / i should have slept with one eye open at night_

****“I don’t remember it being this cold last year,” Mila shivered.  She hugged herself through her thin robes, scarlet and gold tie flapping in the wind.

“I don’t even remember last year,” Chris said, finally turning onto an empty row of bleachers near the very top of the Quidditch stadium.

Yuuri’s ears were already reaching their threshold and the match hadn’t started yet.  He too, was also shivering, although had been a bit more sensible and brought a jacket to go over his robes.  Still, he had a feeling his fingers and ears would be frozen off by the time the game was over. He slid into the row right next to Viktor who was, of course, wearing designer winter apparel that made Yuuri feel cheaper than ever.

“Bleh,” Mila, two people away, made a face and jerked her thumb back at Georgi and Anya who had not paused after sitting down and were now snogging passionately.

How they thought a loud Quidditch game with hundreds of students was romantic, Yuuri wasn’t sure.

“You’re just mad because you’re the only single one here,” Chris smirked.

“Vik—Viktor’s single,” she chattered, drawing her fingers into the arms of her robes.

“True.  But Viktor’s probably disgusted too,” Chris turned.  “Aren’t you, Viktor?”

“I am not,” Viktor declared, snowflakes catching on his pale lips as he spoke. “I am beyond delighted by my friend’s good romance.”

Chris snorted, Mila grinned gleefully, and Yuuri smiled.

“Well I know someone who’s single and most certainly appalled by Georgi’s constant and never-ending public display of affection,” Mila continued.  “He’s short, blonde, a bit of a pain in the ass but we all love him any—”

“Yurio is _not_ single,” Chris burst out in a laugh.  “Might I remind you…”

It had become a bit of a joke among the four—well, five, when Georgi wasn’t with Anya, which was pretty rare these days—of them that Yurio and Otabek were secretly a couple.  Their teasing had only increased a few days ago when they found out Otabek had gotten sick and by the evening, Yurio was too (“A bit suspicious, isn’t it?” Viktor had announced gleefully).

“Ladies and gentleman.” Madam Hooch’s voice spread around, quieting everyone’s conversation to whispers.

“Today is the second Inter-House Quidditch match of the year, in which Ravenclaw will be playing Hufflepuff.”

“Psst, Yuuri!”

He felt a poke on his arm and his stomach coiled in dread.

“Hey, Iris,” he whispered, hoping Viktor wouldn’t feel him pull away.  He took one look at her petite face and mousy brown hair, already frizzy from the snow and wind, then glanced back down the row.

Georgi, Anya, Mila, and Chris were all staring at them, as if they were an exhibit, while Viktor was looking pointedly at the back of a Ravenclaw poster a few rows ahead of them as if he could cause it to burn if he stared hard and long enough.  He probably could, Yuuri thought a second later.

“This year the Ravenclaw team is led by Captain Margaret Vardo, Beater with Eleanora Cuyper.  The Keeper is Luca Vesely, and Chasers Graham Kolar, Ailill Zaal, and Riley Cabello!”

She must have called Sara’s name, although it couldn’t be heard over the explosion of cheers from Riley’s name.

“Hi,” Iris frowned and scooted down next to him.  “I heard it was your birthday a few days ago! Why didn’t you tell me? I could’ve gotten you something!”

“Oh.” A thousand excuses flashed through Yuuri’s head before he decided to settle for the half-truth. “I didn’t really celebrate it this year and I didn’t want to get any presents.  I figured it didn’t matter if I mentioned it a few days late.”

For a second, she looked like she might be upset, and Yuuri prayed she wouldn’t, but finally, she smiled like she’d already forgotten about it. “Okay. I’ll remember for next year, though!”

“Good to know,” Yuuri swallowed and turned back to the game, willing for her to quiet down.

“Ian Hughes is Captain of the Hufflepuff team!” Madam Hooch called.  “Beater along with Adriana Goldsmith. Chasers are Phichit Chulanont, Kimberly Baker, and Charles Hawes!  The Keeper, continuing from last year is Rosaline Lin, and twin brother of the Ravenclaw Seeker is Michele CRISPINO!”

The players flew forward as soon as Madam Hooch gave the word, although they looked a little silly dressed in chunky robes contrary to the usual sleek Quidditch wear.  Yuuri suspected it had been a last minute change when snow started falling that morning, and was eternally grateful that Gryffindor’s next game wasn’t until the beginning of March.

Immediately, Ravenclaw had gotten ahold of the Quaffle and Iris cupped her hands in big floppy mittens around her mouth, shouting her support.

Mila’s look turned poisonous and Chris looked like he was trying not to laugh.  Viktor was still staring at the Ravenclaw poster and Yuuri was starting to become concerned for its safety.

The snow was whirling around, gathering and becoming thicker and thicker.  By now, Yuuri had to squint to see and Mila’s robes were completely soaked.  Someone scored but even with the bright canary and cobalt, it appeared no one could tell who, so a half-hearted cheer came from the crowd.  Yuuri bit on his chapped lips and tried to see, but it was useless.

Suddenly, he felt someone curl around his right arm and he remembered Iris sitting next to him.  Her cheeks were flushed with excitement and her hair looked almost white, covered in snow.

For a strange moment, Yuuri noticed that she was rather very pretty.  Despite her plain features, they came together nicely and happiness radiated from her.

Then the twinge of annoyance came back and he tried to draw his arm closer to himself so she would get the hint and pull away.  Instead, she snuggled into his arm further.

“Cabello scores again!” Madam Hooch called and Yuuri bit back his disappointment.  Last year the Hufflepuffs had only won one game and he had hated seeing how upset Phichit and Michele had been.

By now, the snow was so thick that he could barely see the row in front of them, and Anya’s face on his left looked hazy.

“Ouch! The Seekers have collided—I think?!” Although he couldn’t see her, Yuuri could imagine Madam Hooch craning her neck up in confusion.

“A valiant effort from Baker...unfortunately the hoops were twenty feet to the left, but it’s hard to see in these conditions.”

Yuuri bit back a worried noise, taking off his glasses to wipe them again and turning to Viktor next to him, trying to ignore Iris.  The Ravenclaw poster that had earlier been the target of his vision was now being used as a roof for the student.

“Can you tell who’s win—”

“Time out!” Madam Hooch yelled and immediately conversation took over.

“I can’t see anything,” complained Mila.  “It’s either because of the snow, or my eyes have frozen over and I’m going blind.”

“Who do you reckon’s going to win?” Chris asked.  Like Viktor, his coat was stylish but thin, and his nose was a light shade of pink from the cold.  The emerald hue in his hat brought out the green of his eyes which Yuuri thought looked rather nice—although he had always preferred blue eyes for whatever reason.

“Probably Ravenclaw,” muttered Mila.  Then in a sad voice, added, “Sara’s really good.  Better than her brother, at least—sorry, Yuuri.”

“You can’t still be moping over Sara,” Chris sighed.  “There’s plenty of fish in the sea, dear. And you’re one hell of a catch.  You know, if you weren’t gay…”

“Do you not want Ravenclaw to win?” Yuuri asked, not wanting to hear what Chris was about to hypothetically offer while Iris was wrapped up next to him.

“No,” Mila scowled, having seemed to take Chris’s gentle scolding seriously. “If they were going to earn my respect they’d first have to stop being so snotty.  I’d hate if they won.”

Yuuri wasn’t sure at this point if she was just mad at Riley for dating Sara, or if she was mad at Sara too.  Every few times she’d get a wistful, sad, look on her face after scorning upon Sara. He wondered what made her feel the need to be rude when she clearly still liked her.

 _“I_ hope Ravenclaw is winning,” Iris said in a superior tone from his side. “Hufflepuff is too easy of a match and I want to play a _real_ team.”

Yuuri’s brain almost stopped working.

It was Viktor, who had remained silent for almost twenty minutes now, that spoke: “Last I remembered, Hufflepuff beat you last year.  I’m not sure how much that says about them, because Yuri Plisetsky is the only person on the Slytherin team with real talent, but perhaps you shouldn’t say such things when you’re not any better.”

If he hadn’t been so cold, Yuuri’s jaw would’ve dropped wide open.  Chris’s eyes were darting imperceptibly between the three of them in a sharp gaze, his dark eyebrows drawn together.

Iris’s grip on Yuuri’s arm went still.  She stared wide-eyed at Viktor, and Yuuri found himself, in a sort of selfish way, admiring how dark Viktor’s eyes looked as he stared her down.

After a pause that felt as if it stretched on for minutes, Yuuri realized everyone was waiting for him to be the peacemaker.

Right.  Iris was with him.

“Hey,” he said hastily.  “We can all like different teams, right? And I’m sure Iris was just joking…” No one seemed to be budging. “The same way we all make fun of the other teams.  It’s naturally a part of liking Quidditch.” He swallowed the sour taste in his mouth, wanting nothing more than to be on Viktor’s side. He was right, after all, it was a rude thing to say, much more than simple teasing, and Phichit was his friend as well.  Or was he just agreeing with Viktor because he was...well, Viktor?

“I, for one, am an international Quidditch player and would never say such a nasty and immature thing towards another team,” Viktor said in the iciest voice Yuuri had heard yet, then turned away with his chin set out strongly.

This time, Yuuri had nothing to say.

“‘Scuse us,” Georgi muttered.  He and Anya had apparently not heard the conversation, or they had chosen to forget it had ever happened like Yuuri was strongly considering doing.  They shuffled along the bleachers, and Yuuri leaned back, taking the opportunity to revel in how much he hated the moment.

“It’s so cold,” Anya murmured dreamily.  But, her bare hand was clutching Georgi’s rather than resting in her pocket, so Yuuri had a feeling she wasn’t that cold.  That, or she was willing to get frostbite for the comforts of love.

With a sudden motion, Viktor got up.

“There’s no use in staying any longer when I have two feet of Potions homework waiting for me in the Slytherin Common Room.”  He swept his gray scarf behind his long black coat and ran a hand through his hair before following Georgi and Anya out of the row and heading down to exit the stadium.

Iris, who had been silent through all of this, suddenly let go of Yuuri’s arm, warmth he hadn’t realized he’d been appreciating, and stood up, dusting her pants off with great dignity.

“I think I should get going.” She met his eyes only. “I’ll see you later, Yuuri.”

“Oh,” he replied dumbly.  Five minutes ago he would’ve been relieved but now he just felt guilt seeping through him.  When had he become this type of person? “Yeah. I’ll see you in Defense Against the Dark Arts on Monday.”

But she had already turned and was climbing down the stairs, disappearing into the snow.

There was a beat of apparent silence, while the game raged on.

“Katsuki Yuuri,” drawled Chris from beside him. “When I first met you I didn’t realize you’d be a heartbreaker.”

Yuuri frowned.  Sure, he felt guilty, but he didn’t realize he’d been so rude everyone could see through it.

“I’ll talk to her on Monday,” he said. “I’ll explain I didn’t mean to come off like that and I’m sure she’ll understand.”

Chris just gave him a sympathetic smile, one that didn’t quite reach his eyes.

“I wasn’t talking about her.”

***

Ravenclaw ended up winning the match, as Iris had hoped.  She even gushed about in Defense Against the Dark Arts the next week before Yuuri could even apologize.  It seemed any tension or awkwardness had been erased over the rest of the weekend, and he was relieved. It was nice to have a friend who didn’t hold grudges.

Despite the mini victory that week, the weather only got worse and worse, leaving no good time to practice Quidditch.  Eventually, JJ temporarily canceled the weekly practices until they got back from winter break, where they were to “work twice as hard”.  Yuuri found himself inching towards winter break by telling himself that as each week went by he was almost there.

On top of all the pre-O.W.L. course work, he was falling sick, probably karma for making fun of Yurio and Otabek.  Already he was feeling the side effects, losing all motivation to study and staying in bed for hours on end. He got a note from Iris that he preferred to forget the sappy contents of, and a house elf (sent by Phichit) delivered him tea for several days in a row.

With a nose that was either stuffed or dripping uncontrollably and a rolling stomach, Yuuri had skipped the past three days of classes and had only really talked to Otabek and JJ when they weren’t in class.  It was one of the few times Yuuri despised the rule of not going to other dormitories, for he was growing lonely confined to his own bed.

Thankfully, Otabek was consistently bringing him the work he was missing, which meant he was actually ahead of the workload for the most part.  The second December twenty-first came, he would be able to hop onto his flight to Japan to see his family again without any work weighing on his mind.

JJ was telling him what he missed in practice, which was starting to drive Yuuri crazy, although he knew the Captain meant well.  Every description of flying had him itching to get up and get moving, but he knew if he tried, the contents of his stomach would be hurled over the soft maroon carpet.

Finally, in the last day before break, Yuuri was able to make it to class, settling down next to Iris.  The holiday spirit was compelling him to be nicer, so he gave her a big smile when she turned to him.

“We’ve got to exchange presents before you leave!” She exclaimed excitedly and a pit of dread formed in Yuuri’s stomach.

It was worth a try, he supposed.

“Oh, maybe we could do it after I get back?  I—I was going to get you something in Japan,” he lied.

“Sure,” she beamed as if this only excited her more.

That was the problem with Iris, he decided.  No matter what he did, she kept coming back.

Yurio shot Yuuri a _look,_ conveying more disgust than any normal person could manage out in conversation.

“Back to work, Plisetsky,” sighed Professor Slughorn. “I know the holidays are almost here, but if we don’t get this Counter-Jinx down before class lets out you’re all going to have to practice it over break, and I don’t want angry owls from your parents…”

***

Yuuri wasn’t sure what felt different for a moment as his eyes flew open.  Everything registered, that he was on a plane going back to Japan, that the pilot was on the intercom telling everyone to buckle their seatbelts because they were descending, and that he could breathe.

He gazed at his reflection in the TV on the back of the person in front of him’s seat and let a small smile spread onto his face.  His stomach felt fine, better than ever, really, and any trace of sickness had disappeared during his twelve-hour sleep.

 _A good start,_ he thought, suddenly elat ed. _An_ _d I get to see my family in a few hours._

That was the thought he kept with him as he got off the bustling plane full of germs and people of all languages, probably all Muggles.

He would have much rathered to Floo powder over, but his parents were yet to install the system in the family fireplace and he knew no one nearby in Japan well enough to ask, so he opted for the Muggle transportation.  It was, however, what he had grown up with, so he didn’t mind too much. His lips curled up in a slight smile at the thought of Viktor or another one of his pure-blooded friends using such exotic forms of travel and wondered what they would think.

“Yuuri!”

Yuuri whirled around, lost in his thought and spotted his mother and father on the far side of the airport.  Hoping not to attract too much attention but also drawn by them, he half walked, half ran towards them. He stopped short, resisting the urge to barrel into their arms by smiling with as much warmth as he could.

“Hi,” he said shyly, then, “where’s Mari?”

While he loved his parents, Mari was closer to him and knew him better than anyone else in the whole country.  She had been his one real friend until he’d left for Hogwarts, and she’d gone to Australia the same year to study.  He hadn’t even seen her over the summer because she’d been traveling with her boyfriend, so it had been a long time.

Too long.  Already, all the things he couldn’t wait to tell her were building up inside him.

“She’s arriving tomorrow,” his mother smiled.  “Should we head back to the house?”

It was in walking distance, but as soon as they stepped out, Yuuri couldn’t help but feel out of place in the country he’d grown up in.

During the summer, he’d stayed indoors for most of the time or in the hot springs that his parents ran.  But outside in the streets for the first time in a while, he felt like a tourist.

_When did that happen?_

As he walked through the front door and his parents shut it behind him, something felt off immediately.

“Where’s Vicchan?” he bit his lip, expecting his beloved dog to run up to him immediately.  Even the name sounded odd now, after meeting and becoming friends with the boy he’d named him after.

“Oh,” his mother’s face fell, looking crestfallen. “He’s just at the vet getting a checkup.  We dropped him off right before we went to pick you up. We thought you’d be fine without him for a few hours today.  After all, it’s almost dark.”

Hating to see his parents upset, Yuuri kicked himself internally.  Why did he feel so...strange? “It’s okay, really, I was just surprised.”

“We were going to make cookies, like the old times,” his father started cautiously. “Gingerbread and orange white chocolate. Yours and Mari’s favorites.  That way she’ll be able to grab some when she arrives tomorrow. Would you like to join us?”

It was so incredibly formal, yet what Yuuri should’ve expected.  If there was one thing he’d learned returning to Hasetsu after nine months of not seeing his family, it was how much he’d magnified them.  Maybe it was because he had been so alone back in Japan that their love seemed all he needed. But meeting his friends at Hogwarts back in Scotland had made him realize just how alone he felt.  Maybe he had been accepting of that type of love before, but now, it felt barren.

“Okay,” he swallowed. “I’d like to see my room first, though, if that’s okay.”

“Of course,” his mom smiled quickly. “Just come down whenever you’re ready.  We’ll be making the batter.”

Yuuri padded upstairs, opening the door to his modest room, the last rays of light fading onto his blue bedspread.  The walls looked bare still, even though it had been months since he’d taken all but one of his posters of Viktor off the wall.  He just didn’t have the heart to take down the signed one.

It had been strange to go to bed staring at pictures of his friend, but he figured he could keep at least one.  Either way, they weren’t the same as before. They were Viktor of course, but they weren’t _Viktor._

Yuuri dropped his bag and reached under his bed for the posters he had been unable to throw away.  No matter how many times he’d run out before the sun rose, holding them over the recycle bin on Wednesdays, he could never tell himself to let go.

Paging through, Yuuri stopped at one poster, picturing Viktor flattened down on a broom, his once long hair tied in a ponytail that was coming undone.  He had a hardened look on his face, one that he put on in competition and Yuuri was yet to see in person. He’d never noticed it before, not before he met him.

Viktor had always been an idol for Yuuri, too far in the sky to reach.  Even when he’d been given the chance, like when he saw him for the first time at Hogwarts, there was an emotional block.

Now, he was his closest friend.  The face Viktor put on for posters and games was alien to Yuuri, having spent so much time getting to know his soft and real side.

 _Stop it,_  he reprimanded himself.  Last winter break he had spent his time with Viktor, but only because his family had been visiting his sister and he had felt like an intruder.  This year he was lucky to be with them, and he wasn’t going to waste it thinking about what he could be doing with Viktor.

A bitter taste passed through his mouth for a second, wondering if the other boy would be spending Christmas with any of their friends.  Maybe Mila or Chris or Georgi.

It was an effort to push any unfair jealousy away, but he preferred not to think of the less favorable situation: Viktor spending his birthday and the holidays alone, stuck with his detached parents.

As Yuuri’s eyes cast his room, that felt emptier, even more than in the summer, he realized what was missing.  Vicchan’s bed.

Pushing the posters back away, Yuuri got up and headed downstairs, forcing himself to cheer up.

“Mom,” he called halfheartedly.  The smell of sweet spices hit his nose, and he wasn’t sure if it was the nostalgia or the fact that he hadn’t been able to smell clearly for a week, but he nearly teared up.

“Yes, Yuuri?” She turned around, her short hair tied in a ponytail and one arm around the bowl that his father was mixing.

“Did you move Vicchan’s bed?” he asked, feeling a little childish. “I noticed it wasn’t there.”

“Oh, sweetie.  I moved it to the back of the house.  I thought he might get lonely always going in there to sleep when you’re not there.”

 _But it’s always been in my room,_ Yuuri thought stupidly, _you can’t just_ move _it._

“That makes sense,” he tried swallowing away the strange feeling that had been pressing on him since he’d boarded the flight to Japan.  “Can I help with the cookies?”

“Of course, Yuuri.” This time it was his dad who spoke and handed him the spatula.  “Would you mix this up for me? I’m going to check the oven.”

This was home, Yuuri told himself repeatedly as he watched the flour, sugar, and eggs blend into one and go around and around in the bowl.  He was going to enjoy the week he had in Japan and stop getting so upset about everything that had changed in the short time he’d been gone.

His sister, the city, his parents, Vicchan’s bed were all small differences he wouldn’t have been concerned about two years ago.  Really, the only thing that had changed was him.

Yet still, beyond his newfound maturity and friends, something felt off.

***

Yuuri was walking down the stairs, already feeling much fresher than the murky night before, when a loud voice came from the bottom.

“There he is!”

“Mari!” he exclaimed, forgetting himself and barreling into her arms.  She smelled of smoke, a new hobby she’d taken up over her time away—one that he wasn’t too fond of.

“Little brother,” she grinned and pulled away. “You’ve got another friend who wants to see you too.”  She looked to the open door and Yuuri followed her gaze.

“Vicchan!” he called out and watched his mom let more lead onto the leash.

He buried his face into his mini toy goldendoodle and smiled against Vicchan’s soft curls.  He smelled like the vet and medication, but he was still jumping up and down and licking Yuuri’s face.

“I missed you,” he cooed, pulling his ears up and letting them flop down like he had done almost every day of his life with Vicchan.

“We were going to head out Nanatsugama and I thought we could bring Vicchan,” his mom handed him the leash as Yuuri stood up, still smiling down at his dog.

“We were there when we were little.  Did you know that, Yuuri?” Mari reached down to give Vicchan a friendly pat. “I only remember the cliffs and the blue ocean.”

“There’s markets, too,” Yuuri’s father said, grabbing a light coat and stepping outside.  It was a beautiful day, a blue sky and not a trace of snow on the ground, despite being the day before Christmas Eve.

“That’s where we’re heading first,” Yuuri’s mom shut the door behind them.  “After we get something to eat, we can go to the most popular spot, which was what Mari remembered.  The ocean looks beautiful, and there’s even a hike that goes up on the cliffs which gives you a better view.”

 _“And_ Mom promised we could go to Hado Misaki later in the day.  Supposedly they got snow and the water is frozen over there.”

“What about the springs?” Yuuri asked, pulling Vicchan along as they walked down the path to the bus stop.

“I got Minako to take over for the day.  She should get over in a few hours,” she said as the gravel crunched underneath their shoes. “Today’s all about you.”

***

Despite living near the ocean for most of his life, Yuuri wasn’t a fan of seafood.  So when the intense smell of fish hit his nose, he almost stopped walking. After a relatively short bus ride, they’d finally reached the markets.

The sounds of conversation and birds ahead filled his ears, the staggering coast to the left.  Mari was right, the ocean was a deep blue, and the waves reflected the sunlight, making it blinding to look at.

“I know you haven’t had breakfast yet, Yuuri, but I thought we could grab lunch here,” his mom offered kindly.  “And get something for Vicchan too.”  
Vicchan was on the edge of his leash, on his hind legs and begging for food from a vendor.  Yuuri laughed, his heart lightening a thousand degrees at the sight, but pulled on the leash, apologizing.

“Ooh, we could go over there!” Mari pointed farther down at a large stand with a huge display of sushi and tables overlooking the ocean.

She slung her arm around Yuuri and smiled down at him.  At least that was what it felt like. She was only an inch taller than him, but he’d always see her as his big sister.

“Enjoying your day so far, Yuuri?”

“I am,” Yuuri smiled, not even meaning for his eyes to flick towards Vicchan who was tugging on his bright blue leash.  “It’s nice to be home. Weird, but nice.”

“Mom wanted to just stay home for the time that you were going to be here, you know,” Mari said, a little quieter as they made their way down. “I got here early this morning and talked her out of it.  I figured you’d be all weird with nothing to do.”

“I would be,” Yuuri said.  “It was how I felt last night.  But now, it’s...a new day. And everything’s back to normal.”

“Good to know,” she flashed him a grin and took away her arm.  “By the way, you never got to tell me about Hogwarts. And Vik—”

“Is this the one, Mari?” they heard from behind.

Mari stuck her tongue out at Yuuri, and fell back in line with their parents.

“Let’s get that!” she pointed at a full plate of California rolls, Yuuri’s favorite. “Oh and the one with squid!”

Laughing, Yuuri pulled Vicchan close and told them he would go to find a seat while they ordered.

“That’s a beautiful dog you have there,” said an older boy, cleaning up a table for four. “I’m just leaving, by the way—you can have this.”

“Thanks,” Yuuri became shy immediately.  He let Vicchan out a little more, and the boy knelt down to pet him.  “And thanks, for the table, too.”

He just grinned and squinted against the light. “Is that your girlfriend you were walking with?”

Typical, Yuuri thought.  Mari always had people asking about her.

“No, she’s my sister.”  He shot the boy an awkward look.  “But she has a boyfriend of over a year, sorry.”

“Oh I wasn’t talking about her,” the boy grinned, leaving the air open for conversation.

Yuuri’s cheeks flushed and he subconsciously pushed his glasses up on his nose.  “Ah. I actually go to school in Scotland, I’m just back here for the holidays.”

“What a shame.”  The boy had an attractive air to him, he seemed so sure of himself without it quite reaching arrogance, and he was tall and charming. “I’ll see you around in the next few days, then.” He left with a lazy wave, giving Vicchan one more pet.

“Oh good, you got a table,” Mari sighed, taking three heavy plates of sushi from their parents and placing them down. “Who was that?”

“No one,” Yuuri said quickly before hooking Vicchan’s leash around the table.  “Looks delicious,” he nodded towards the sushi.

Mari rolled her eyes and waved her hand to invite him to start eating.  She immediately started up a conversation with their parents about something her boyfriend had done back in Australia, leaving Yuuri to look down at the waves crashing against the rocks below.

At first, it was the seagulls above that reminded him of Viktor, and what he had said about appreciating things before they were gone.  He couldn’t help but remember last year when Viktor had told him about his contract with the Quafflepunchers, how he was to leave after his fifth year or lose his position.

It was the blue-eyed boy who’d taken his breath away the first time he’d seen him that Yuuri saw in the ocean, and he decided right then and there that he didn’t ever want to have to say goodbye.

“Enough of me talking,” Mari laughed, halfway through a plate of shrimp sushi that made Yuuri’s stomach coil. “I haven’t heard from you yet, little brother.  How’s Hogwarts? More importantly…” She smirked. “How’s Viktor?”

Yuuri shot her a warning glance.  Only she really knew his past obsession with Viktor to its fullest extent.  She had been the one to get him the posters and take him to the matches. As far as he was concerned, his parents only saw Viktor as an idol that represented his love for some magical sport.

Mari wiggled her eyebrows and gave him a look that implied they’d be talking later.

“It’s good,” Yuuri said concisely.  “I really like the Quidditch. It’s much more competitive than Mahoutokoro, which I think is good for me, and it’s much more like real Quidditch teams too.  There’s even a Cup for the team that scores the most points over the year. The whole school loves it, even those who don’t play themselves.”

“And how are your classes going?” Yuuri’s father asked, looking up at him through his glasses.  Despite being shorter by almost a few inches now, he always felt like he was being scrutinized somehow.

“Good as well,” Yuuri swallowed. “The material is much more challenging than back at Mahoutokoro and I think it’s furthering my edu—”

Mari choked on the sip of guava juice she was taking, a noise that sounded suspiciously like a laugh.

Yuuri kicked her under the table.

“Bless you, Mari.  Anyways, I really feel like I’m learning more, and there’s also a wider range of classes to choose from so I can really pursue what I’m interested in.”

“Excellent,” Yuuri’s mom patted him on the shoulder.  “I’m so proud of you, Yuuri. Of course, we miss you around the house, but I’m happy you’re getting the right education for you.  Now, do you think we should go on that hike before the two o’clock wave hits?”

It stung a little that his parents were only concerned about academics, and only Mari was concerned about his social life and well-being, but he pushed it back.  That was just how his parents were, and he knew they still cared. Even if his memory of them before wasn’t so...flat.

“Come on, Vicchan,” he smiled, taking his leash again.  “We’re going on a walk!”

He’d never seen his dog so excited before.

***

“Mom, don’t the rocks look like tofu?” Mari had a hand shielding her eyes from the sun.

“I’m not seeing it,” Yuuri looked down at the waves washing over the uniform slabs of rock sitting near the shore.

“I wasn’t talking to you,” Mari replied, but not without affection.  She had lit another cigarette, causing Vicchan to bury his nose between Yuuri’s legs, which they both found quite adorable.

“I don’t like how high up we are,” Yuuri observed.  One step and he would be falling to his death, only a thin rope holding him back.

“I thought you played Quidditch,” Mari rolled her eyes and dropped the cigarette on the grassy ground near the edge.

“I know, but this is different,” Yuuri sighed. “Like we’re on the edge of the world or something.”

Mari rolled her eyes, but he knew she was listening and thinking about what he was saying.  She always did. If he was another person, he would’ve thought family was obligated to do such a thing.

She kicked the cigarette, still burning its last embers, off the cliff and Yuuri watched as it plummeted, a spark he strained his eyes to see until it was crushed by the dizzying waves below.

***

“When did you learn to ice skate?” Mari asked, surprised.  She glided along easily on the thick ice covering the water off of Hado Misaki, her wisps of her short hair framed by the setting sun.

“Viktor taught me,” Yuuri smiled without meaning to as he slid forward.

“Don’t go too far!” called their mother, sitting on the edge next to their father.  The two had opted out of the skating, but Mari had insisted that Yuuri go with her.

“We won’t!” Mari yelled back before turning to Yuuri. “Oooh, when?”

“Winter break,” Yuuri sighed, knowing what was coming—a full-scale investigation of their friendship.

“And what did you guys do over winter break? I bet he taught you a lot of _moves,_ didn’t he?”

Yuuri reached out to push her but she skated back, laughing.

“Hey! It’s just a light hearted joke,” she grinned, grabbing his hand and pulling him out farther.

“How about I ask you about what you and your boyfriend spend your time, doing, then?” Yuuri laughed, despite everything.

“Oh, Yuuri, I could tell you volumes,” she spun around so he didn’t have to face the sun. “Unlike you, I am _very_ open about my sex life.”

“Viktor and I are _not_ having sex!” Yuuri spattered out indignantly. “We’re not even dating! We’re _friends!”_

His sexuality was no secret to Mari, although he had never explicitly told her.  It had always just been a train of her assuming and him never denying. His parents, however, were either very oblivious or quietly accepting.  He wasn’t exactly sure which one he would prefer.

“Sounds like something someone who’s having sex with Viktor Nikiforov would say,” she smirked, then paused. “On second thought, I think anyone in their right mind would be proud of that.  That man is _gorgeous.”_

“Gross. He’s sixteen. You’re nineteen. You also have a boyfriend, if that counts for anything.”

 _Seventeen, tomorrow,_ he remembered.

“Right,” Mari rolled her eyes. “Well if you won’t spill the juicy information then tell me about, you know, the boring stuff.  Like the exact color of his eyes and how good he is at Quidditch.”

“That’s not boring,” Yuuri said without thinking, which earned a sly smile from Mari. “And he has blue eyes, but you can’t pretend you didn’t know that.” The truth was, Yuuri knew a million ways to describe Viktor’s eyes, and at least half of them didn’t have the word blue in them.

“Mmm, only because of _your_ obsession,” Mari pulled him to the right as they changed the direction they were skating.

“I haven’t really seen him play since I’ve been at Hogwarts,” Yuuri admitted. “He coached me last year bec—”

Mari dropped his hand violently and slid to a stop, grinding her blades into the ice so harshly that Yuuri winced, holding his breath for the terrifying second he was convinced the ice would cave in.

“VIKTOR NIKIFOROV COACHED YOU?!”

“Erm, yeah,” Yuuri said, racking his brain at record speed.  He _had_ mentioned it…hadn’t he?

“Oh my God,” Mari sighed. “I mean I would’ve thought you’d be too nervous to function in front of him but I guess you guys are friends, so…”

“I was,” Yuuri choked up a laugh. “I screwed up during tryouts just because he was there.  And then we got assigned as partners in Potions and I could barely do anything right while sitting next to him.  The lessons with him were the worst though,” he said with a wry smile. Never had he thought he’d be looking back fondly on them. “I got so nervous I didn’t even catch the Snitch the first time and he had to go up there and get it himself.”

“He didn’t!” Mari laughed, her mouth wide open.  They had stopped skating now, so caught up in conversation.

“He did! And with a whole crowd of first-year girls watching!” This part was a little less of a fond memory, although funny nonetheless.

“Yuuri,” Mari laughed. “You have, like, connections.  I’m offended there were no cute boys at Mahoutokoro that I could’ve fallen in love with.”

“You won’t believe what else he did,” Yuuri slid forward and leaned in, about to spill a secret he wasn’t sure if he wanted to tell.  But Mari was his sister, and no one would have his back like her.

“What?” she asked, eyes wide.

“You know how I said he showed up to tryouts? Well, I was so shocked because he was supposed to be going to a party. But he had them move it so he could watch me play. And probably one of his other friends too, but…”

“Yuuri he looooves you!” Mari squealed, acting if she was five years younger than he actually was.

“There’s something else too,” Yuuri’s stomach squirmed, his blood pumping. “He was taking Muggle Studies and told me he wasn’t getting a lot of the material so he wanted me to help.”

"Aww,” Mari’s cheeks were red from excitement.

“Last year I found out on the train back that he lied.  He already knew the course material and just asked me for help all year so we could spend time together.  At first I was mad but th—”

Mari was jumping up and down. “Yuuri this is the cutest thing I’ve ev—”

A weird noise came from under them and Yuuri looked down, casually at first.

Apparently Mari saw the same thing he did, the spreading, spidery crack forming between them on the ice, because they both looked up and met each other’s eyes for a second.  Then time sped up and she grabbed his hand as they clumsily skated back to the shore.

They slowed, letting their skates pull them back in, and Yuuri thought he was out of breath because of the skating, but he realized he was laughing, breaths coming out fast and hard, fogging the air, caught in the rose light of the sun.

“Hey boy,” Yuuri’s skates hit the rocks, not far from where their parents were sitting, and Vicchan stood proudly, wagging his tail furiously.

“You’re the cutest dog in the world,” Mari patted him furiously, kneeling down on the ice and kissing him on the nose. “The _cutest.”_

“Hey, that’s my job.” Yuuri tangled his fingers in his dog’s curled fur, picking him up and staring at his perfect face adoringly. “Vicchan, you are the cutest dog in the world.”

Mari grinned, pulling off her skates, then clambering onto the rocks with only thin socks on. “He’ll always love you best, Yuuri.”

Yuuri put him back down where he ran to Mari, jumping in circles excitedly, then quickly took off his skates, leaving them right on the edge of the ice so he could join his sister and dog.

“So you were telling me about Viktor,” Mari said casually as he found a rock close to hers and sat down, gathering Vicchan in his lap.

“Hmm, was I?” he asked, shooting his sister a grin.  One they both knew wouldn't last long. She’d been gone for a while and the last time they’d talked had been ages ago, but nothing had changed.  If there was one person Yuuri liked to talk about nonstop, it was Viktor. “He’s like the Viktor we see in newspapers and in matches, but at the same time he’s really not.”

Mari raised her eyebrows, clearly intrigued.

“It’s hard to explain,” sighed Yuuri, pulling Vicchan closer.  The goldendoodle was snuggled against his chest, his floppy ears as adorable as ever. “On one hand, he’s not fake and I couldn’t imagine him saying something he didn’t mean.  He’s the real deal, you know? All charming and funny like he always is. But there’s just another level to him that he doesn’t show to everyone that’s, I don’t know, a little…”

Suddenly feeling like he was sharing too much, Yuuri pulled back from his thoughts of Viktor.  The sun had almost set entirely and a chill was starting to arrive. The sky was still faded pink, but he had lost his earlier momentum.

“A little what?” Mari asked, petting Vicchan mindlessly.

“A little different,” Yuuri decided. “I can’t really explain it.”

“You seem happy,” Mari remarked.

Yuuri was taken aback, expecting her to pry more or go on about how they were perfect for each other.  He knew she had only been joking, but some uncontrollable part of himself felt an ache each time she mentioned what they could be.

“I am,” he said softly, feeling Vicchan’s head flop against his chest and fall asleep.  His heart contracted. “I wasn’t sure I would be, but I have more friends than I ever have before.  I look forward to waking up each morning.”

“Happiness looks good on you,” Mari barely smiled but the warmth was all where it mattered, in her dark brown eyes, shadowed by the last of the light.

“Are you?” Yuuri blurted out, his hands still pressed in Vicchan’s soft fur, drawing as much warmth as he could to himself.

“Hm?”

“Happy.  Are you?”

“I don’t know,” she answered, a tinge of uncertainty in her voice. “I’m not sad, or afraid, or angry.”  She tapped her foot methodically. “I moved away from home because I was so tired of the sameness of it all, and I’m in a wonderful country.  I’ve got a boyfriend who’s nothing but kind to me. But am I happy? I don’t know, Yuuri.”

“People always say that before you can be loved you have to love yourself, but I don’t think that’s true,” Yuuri murmured, not sure where the words spilling from his mouth were coming from. “I’m not an expert on love but I think the two go hand in hand; sometimes, other people are the ones who teach you to love yourself, even if they don’t mean it.  Maybe the same goes for happiness. You don’t have to find it yourself, and maybe you’ll meet someone who teaches you what happiness is.”

“And what is happiness to you?” Mari tilted back her head, staring up at the sky.

“Today,” Yuuri said, surprising himself. “Today’s Christmas Eve, and Christmas has always been my favorite holiday, and I spent it every year with you guys, but last year was the first time that didn’t happen.  I miss being young and excited, and I know I’m only sixteen and it probably sounds foolish to you but I needed today, to make sure I didn’t forget about you while I was away in Scotland.”

“Did you know Dad hates dogs?” Mari suddenly laughed, eyes glued to the sky.  Her knees were drawn up to her body and she hugged herself, chin resting on them.  “I overheard him talking to Mom after you asked for Vicchan, but she convinced him.  Eventually. Do you know why?”

Yuuri shook his head.

“They were worried you were lonely, and they thought you needed someone else, someone who couldn’t talk and would just be there whenever you needed.  And when you went to Hogwarts, I was terrified because you never did well in new environments, especially without us. _Especially_ without Vicchan.  I thought you needed him, but now, you don’t anymore.”

“I do,” Yuuri hugged his resting dog defensively into his chest.  “I still need him as much as I always have.”

“No you don’t,” Mari said, surprisingly strong.  She turned to look Yuuri straight in the eyes. “I haven’t been home in a year and a half and I was shocked to see you this morning.  You really are a completely different person. In a good way. I’m trying to take in every second I can with you because I _know_ you’ll be out of here as soon as you graduate.”

“That’s not true,” Yuuri said.  “Hasetsu is my home.”

“Then what’s Hogwarts to you?”

He was silent, but not deliberately, for he did not know the answer.

“Maybe Hasetsu was your home, but since you left, your heart has been elsewhere.  You love the castle and the classes and the Quidditch and the people. I’ve already seen it happening, but when you leave, you will have found yourself.  I can promise you that.” She sniffled slightly. “And I’m really, really happy for you because I know you’ve struggled with that for so long.”

Yuuri heard a shout, then blinked, suddenly aware of how dark it had become.

“Coming!” Mari called, not breaking her gaze. “Yuuri, just know, even if you don’t leave Hogwarts as the same person as when you entered, you will always be my brother.”

If the stars above wanted to whisper something to the unknowing parents, the lost daughter, the emerging son, and the star-crossed dog, they did not show, for they were silent.

***

“It’s Christmas Day!” called an energetic voice from downstairs, and Yuuri rolled over in his bed, squinting and covering his eyes from the sun piercing through his thin and gauzy curtains.

 _It’s Viktor’s birthday,_ he thought in a half-groggy state, then shot up in bed, suddenly awake, a sudden childish excitement coming across him.

The smell of eggnog and the gingerbread cookies they’d made two nights ago (although it felt like much longer) wafted up to his room and Yuuri slid out of his bed, barefoot on the comfortably cool wooden floorboards.

He threw on a black and gray sweatshirt although the weather in Japan felt warm compared to Scotland’s unusually chilling winter.  He paused one second, took a look at the single poster on his wall, then half-ran downstairs until he reached the landing, slowing to a walk so he wouldn’t look excited enough to merit a remark from his sister.

“Yuuri’s finally awake,” Mari rolled her eyes but gave him a smile.  “Mom wouldn’t let me wake you. She insisted you needed as much rest as possible.”  She beckoned him over to the tree, a modest pile of presents resting underneath.

“Did you get enough sleep, Yuuri?” beamed their mother, carrying a tray of steaming cookies.  Next to her was their father, expertly holding four mugs weaved between his two hands. Mari ran forward to grab two and relieve him, handing one to Yuuri.

“I did,” Yuuri smiled.  “I enjoy sleeping in my own bed more than I remember.”

“I miss being able to sleep through the night,” sighed their father, settling down on the floor and letting out a groan.

“What keeps you up at night, dear Father?” Mari grinned. “The accumulated horrors of life?”

“Old age,” he said.

Yuuri smiled into his cup of eggnog.

They began to settle down, joining together on the floor.  Mari grabbed two gingerbread cookies stuck together, made a satisfying crunch as she broke them in half and instinctively handed one to Yuuri.

“Did you friends last year give you any presents, Yuuri?” his mother asked, as if the guilt of excluding him last year was sinking in.

“Yes,” Yuuri said, munching on the cookie. “I just got a lot of candy—Wizard candy, that is.  Which is very different from normal candy.”

“What did Viktor get you?” Mari shot him an innocent smile.

Yuuri paused, his mouth going dry.  Unexpectedly, the Firebolt was the first thing that shot through his mind.  The awkward conversation and his refusal, a little bit of morals he had kept and refused to let go of from home.  Viktor, of course, had been stunned, but he had certainly never struggled with money before.

Then the framed moving picture of course, of the two spinning in dizzy circles on the ice in Saint Petersburg.  Yuuri had kept it in his trunk all year at Hogwarts, afraid damage or questions might come to it if he left it out.  It was only when he came home for the summer that he left it on his bedside table. Yet whenever someone had come into his room, he had made sure to hide it with a beating heart as though he was keeping a selfish secret.  He wanted that memory to stay only between him and Viktor, and no one else.

“Candy,” Yuuri lied straight through his teeth. “Like I said, that’s what most people give one another there.  Maybe it’s a gift-giving tradition or something, I’m not sure.”

“Hm,” Mari turned back to the plate of cookies, grabbing another, then staring hungrily at the Christmas tree. “Can we open presents now?”

“Sure,” chuckled their mother.  “Why don’t you go first, Mari?”

Mari dropped the forgotten cookie and reached for a large, silver present, lithely tearing it open with her long fingers.

“Cool! A snow globe!” she said happily, looking at Yuuri.

“A little piece of Japan you can keep with you while you’re in Australia...even if it doesn’t snow that much here,” Yuuri added shyly.

Mari shook it happily, picking up the cookie she’d set down and munching on it again, watching the snow whirl down.

“Pass me the red box, would you, Mari?” their father asked, as Mari complied.

“This one’s from Yuuri and me,” she smiled.

Yuuri set down his mug of eggnog, awaiting their father to open the box of colored bow ties, something he shamelessly collected.  Suddenly, he stood up without thinking.

“Vicchan!” he exclaimed. “We forgot him!”

Hiroko and Toshiya both paled, although Yuuri didn’t notice.  He was already running excitedly towards the back of the house near the hot springs, where Vicchan’s bed was, feeling like a little kid again.  The sleepy dog was probably still snoozing, since they’d gotten back late.

“Hey, boy,” Yuuri scratched under his neck.  Vicchan’s eyes slowly opened as Yuuri grazed a bump beneath his curly fur.

Unused to the slow awakening, Yuuri frowned and stood up, looking for the bag of dog food.

“Late start?” he cooed.  He finally spotted the bag and grabbed it off the lower shelf deftly. “Maybe some food will wake you up.”

Yuuri wasn’t really sure in what moment he realized something was wrong, because as he saw the silver food bowl, with Vicchan’s name carved in Yuuri’s childish handwriting, uncharacteristically full, his body was already tense and buzzing.

Vicchan had closed his eyes again and was stretched out, something he never did, which was when Yuuri picked him up desperately.

“What’s wrong, boy?” he murmured, cradling Vicchan back and forth.  “Why are you so sleepy? And you always eat your food right away.”

There was a bitter, guilty, feeling in Yuuri’s stomach, although he knew whatever had happened was not his fault.

“Mom!” he called out, surprising himself.  He had thought the first person he’d go to was Mari, but he couldn’t think with that terrible feeling filling him up to the brim, threatening to break. _“_ _Mom!”_

“I’m right here, Yuuri.”

He spun around, spotting his mother, a worried look on her face.  Worried and weary, but not surprised.

“I think something’s wrong with Vicchan,” he spilled out uncontrollably, every word feeling like a jumble and mess. “He won’t stay awake and I was going to fill his bowl up with his favorite food because today’s Christmas but he didn’t even care when the bag rustled and then I looked at his bowl and it was still full from yesterday and I know we didn’t feed him at home yesterday so that means this is from the day before and he would never not eat his food and—”

“How about we take him to the vet?” his mom suggested, carefully reaching towards Yuuri in a voice that sounded like it was suggestive only for the sake of being so.

Yuuri hugged Vicchan to his chest childishly, not wanting to let go.  His mother’s arms fell to her sides.

“I’ll grab the keys,” she said calmly and jogged out in her bare feet on the wooden floor.  Yuuri heard the footsteps fade to a walk and the mumble of conversation as soon as she was out of sight.

 _I can’t believe I was really worrying about being sick on the way here or my Potions essay that I don’t know if I’ll earn an O on, or telling my parents about Viktor when Vicchan could be seriously ill,_ Yuuri thought as he padded his way towards the front of the house in a trance. _Please let Vicchan be okay.  I’ll do anything._

***

“Maybe you should stay outside in the waiting room, Yuuri,” suggested his mom all too kindly, taking Yuuri’s hand and gently pushing it towards the door handle.

“He’s my dog,” Yuuri said firmly.  “I want to find out what’s wrong with him.”

The vet looked uncomfortably between Yuuri and his parents, waiting for a decision to be made.  She had Vicchan sitting on a table with a strip of paper, a setting too white for Yuuri to comprehend.  The lights were far too bright and his vision was already swimming.

“Perhaps it would be best if you _all_ waited outside.”  The vet cleared her throat in an authoritative but sympathetic voice.  “Being alone will help me see how Vicchan’s doing more efficiently, and then we can talk about the options once I’m done examining him.  At this point, though, I’m not sure what we can do.”

“You have to do everything you can,” Yuuri said fiercely.  A year ago he wouldn’t have dared talk to anyone like this, but he didn’t care.

Maybe Mari was right.  Maybe he had changed, even just a bit.

“Yuuri.  You heard her.”

This time it was Yuuri’s dad who spoke, firmly.  “We should head out and let her do her job.”

Yuuri felt like he was blazing, and maybe everyone else could tell as he looked her straight in the eye. _“E_ _verything._ You have to do _everything_ to make him better.”

She blinked, and then looked down.

“Yuuri,” his mom said.  “Let’s go.”

This time, he listened.  He followed his parents out the translucent glass door to the waiting room.  It was just Mari, reading a magazine, her legs crossed and one knee jittering up and down.

There was a moment of painful silence as they all sat down, Yuuri on the far end away from the rest of his family, before, finally, Mari spoke.

“So you’re not going to tell him?” she asked, head raised high.

Yuuri wanted to ask _Tell me what?_ but the question was already there, lingering in the air numbly.

“Almost three months after you left for Hogwarts, we took Vicchan to the vet for his yearly checkup.  The day after your birthday. When we came to pick him up, we saw the same energetic dog we’ve always had, maybe a little sadder since you had left, but this time, our vet looked worried.  She asked us to step inside and talk with her for a second.”

Without even hearing what had happened, Yuuri knew where the story was going and all he could think was _A_ _year. Vicchan’s_ _been sick for over a year and I haven’t noticed._

“Malignant lymphoma,” his mom spoke levelly, as if she’d been practicing this speech for a long time.  Only later, did it occur to Yuuri that she probably had been. Nervous every time she got a letter from him that’d he’d be asking how Vicchan was doing, or that he would spot something wrong like he had today.  “Last month, she told us he might only have a few more months before he reached stage five.

“We—we thought we might have longer.  That he’d at least make it through to the new year and then we could put him down,” Yuuri’s dad said in a voice that wasn’t _not_ sorrowful, but also heavily toned with inconvenience.

_Put him down._

“And _what?!”_  Yuuri demanded, standing up out of his chair.  He felt foolish, because he had nowhere to go, but doing so made him feel more powerful, intimidating.  “Just hope I forget about him? It’s not like I don’t matter when I’m gone, you know. I’m still a part of your family, in case you forgot.”

“We never thought that,” his dad said hurriedly.  “We were going to tell you over the summer but we dreaded every day leading up to the day you came, afraid of how you’d react.  But you seemed much happier when you arrived that we decided we didn’t want to ruin that and maybe you weren’t as dependent on Vicchan as you used to be.  So we pushed the date off again, every week saying we’d tell you the next. Eventually we got to August without you knowing a clue, and we thought if we told you then, the grief would interfere with your studies at Hogwarts, so—”

“As if my _studies_ are more important than my _dog!_ ” Yuuri burst out.  As he said so, a conversation, sparked by what had just been revealed to him, entered his mind.

 _I do,_ he had said, _I still need him as much as I always have._

Mari had protested, just yesterday. _No you don’t._

“You knew too,” Yuuri said accusingly. “You’re my sister and you tried to wane me off Vicchan.  You were manipulating me. Not telling me why.”

“We were the ones who made the decision, Yuuri.”  His mother’s face was pale. “We asked Mari not to tell you before you were ready.”

“I trusted you more than anyone.”  Yuuri didn’t take his eyes off of Mari.  “I don’t care about the excuses they’re making for you.  You’re my sister and you were supposed to tell me _everything.”_

Hot tears were flowing down his cheeks and he didn’t care that he was making a scene in front of the receptionist.

Because for once, it all made sense.

Why his mother had written the letter, telling him of their plans to visit Australia the previous year.  How it had been so carefully crafted to make him feel like he wasn’t invited.

Why when he had finally come home, they seemed more distant than he had ever remembered.

“I’m afraid I have some bad news.”

The vet was poking her head out of the door.  If she was surprised to see the tantrum he was throwing or the blank, hurt, faces of his family, she did not show a trace of it.

“Vicchan has been in a lot of pain.” She widened the door so someone could walk in.  An invitation. “I think at this point it would be best if we were to let him go.”

“Stay here,” Yuuri said suddenly.  He was facing his family. Slightly surprised, he marveled in how calm he could make his voice even when he felt and looked like a wreck.  “I’ll see him off. I don’t want you in there.”

The shock hit the most on Mari’s face, but Yuuri didn’t care.

Everything was white, he remarked, as he numbly followed the vet back into the examination room.  In offices and clinics and hospitals. How strange, then, that it was not the color of mourning.

***

Mari left the next morning, something about a spontaneous New Year’s party her boyfriend was hosting.

Yuuri stayed in his room and packed.

He wasn’t leaving for another week.

When he was done, he dumped out his suitcase and tossed up his clothes.  Then started again.

***

It was a relief to be back in Hogwarts by New Year’s Day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it hurt so bad writing this even though i knew it had to happen. I'M SORRY VICCHAN!!!  
> 1\. this is like kind of a weird chapter because there's not much of viktor in it but i hope you still liked it! it took me FOREVER to write this because i'm best at writing interactions with everyone at hogwarts and i sorta had to figure out yuuri's family and everything. but i hope it was realistic! and i promise this is the chapter with the least viktor throughout the whole story. so if you're only here for him, there's much more to come.  
> 2\. wowwww it's been a while but i swear i still haven't forgotten about this fic. life has just been so busy and i write this in every update but i really really appreciate all your comments. every time i get one i see the email and think about how i should definitely be putting out another chapter. i'm going to try really hard to get a few more out before the school year's over. thank you so much for sticking with me  
> preview: _i should just tell you to leave / ‘cause i know exactly where it leads / but i watch us go ‘round and ‘round each time_


	8. small talk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _i should just tell you to leave / ‘cause i know exactly where it leads / but i watch us go ‘round and ‘round each time_

For once, Yuuri was relieved when holiday break was over.  He was not relieved, however, to hear the boys’ alarm ring at six-fifty in the morning.  Rolling over and groaning, he stared up at the dusty ceiling.

“Turn that blasted alarm off,” grumbled Leo.  He had just gotten back the night before and had spent hours telling them about how much he missed America, a distraction Yuuri had gladly taken.

“I just woke up,” mumbled JJ, face smuggled into his pillow.  He seemed very un-Captain-like in the moment. He was shirtless even in the cold winter, which Yuuri did not understand.  His pale, muscled shoulders, were a contrast to the deep red sheets.

Eventually, it was Otabek who got up, wobbling slightly as he stood and hitting the button before heading off to the bathroom.

Yuuri let out a huff of breath into his pillow, hugging it tightly for a moment.  The image of Vicchan would not leave his head. At least, it hadn’t for the past few days.

He had gotten a letter from his mother, and then another from his father the next day, both separately apologizing for how they handled the situation.  Yuuri didn’t care. He could’ve spent hours more with Vicchan over the summer if he had known...made him more comfortable...prepared emotionally.

Before he could upset himself any further, Yuuri forced himself to get up, eyes groggy and vision blurry as he scuttered into the bathroom.

“G’morning,” Otabek mumbled, rummaging through one of the drawers, looking for his toothbrush.

“Mmhmm,” Yuuri replied incoherently, and thrusted his head underneath the ice-cold water of the sink, relishing in the way his senses flew.  He rubbed the grit out from around his eyes and the tears still pressed into his face from yesterday afternoon.

A second later, the door opened again and Guang Hong entered, heading immediately to the baths.

As Yuuri finally pulled back, he was surprised at how, well, normal he looked.  Compared to how he felt, his face was clean and hair wasn’t as much of a mess as it usually was in the morning.  A tuft of black was sticking up in the back, but that was an easy fix. There were dark circles under his eyes, circles that should’ve gone away after weeks of rest during break, but had only grown deeper.

“I’m not last.” JJ entered the bathroom triumphantly.  How he already had enough energy for all five of them, Yuuri was not sure.

“Wow,” Otabek mumbled into a towel in the dryest voice possible.

“Careful, Altin, or I’ll have you kicked off the team,” JJ smiled, striding over to the sinks.  “You too, Yuuri, if you don’t move from the sink _right now.”_

Despite himself, Yuuri smiled.  “If that means I never have to run down the field holding my broomstick between my legs, then I think I might never move.”

“Very funny,” JJ rolled his eyes. “But my face needs serious help before I can go to class.”

***

“I’m sorry for your loss, Miss Babicheva,” sighed Professor Trelawney, peering up at her over her thick-rimmed glasses.

“My loss?” Mila smiled brightly.

“Over the holidays of course.  Did your dog not pass?”

Yuuri’s heart caught in his chest.  There was no way—

“I’m sorry Professor, but I don’t have a dog.”

There was a snicker around the room and Yuuri let himself breathe again.  She was merely guessing. After all, Mila had been probably moping about Sara taking Riley home to spend the holidays together, and a dying pet was common enough that it would be a reasonable prediction.

Still, his face must have paled dramatically, because as once as Professor Trelawney dismissed them to do their crystal ball gazing, Phichit nudged him.

“You okay?” he asked, flipping through their textbook to find the identification page.

“Fine,” Yuuri said, maybe a little too quickly.

“Want to talk about it?” Phichit dragged the crystal ball over, the cloudy contents whirling around.

“No.  I mean—” Yuuri gave his friend a look. “I didn’t even say anything was wrong.”

“Yes you did,” Phichit said matter of factly, straightening his yellow tie.  “I could hear it in your _tone.”_

A smile found its way onto Yuuri’s face.  He wasn’t sure how, because ever since Christmas Day, he had been feeling like his body was dipped in cold wax and he was just barely sludging alone.

Why _was_ he keeping this to himself?  The only three people who knew, he was furious with, although Mari a little less.  He didn’t exactly _want_ to talk about Vicchan, yet there was no listener he knew better than Phichit, and more importantly, no one he felt more comfortable around.

“We could go to the kitchens after second block ends,” suggested Phichit, his tone expertly light.  “To study, or talk, if you’d like. And eat, of course.”

“Okay,” Yuuri agreed.  “Just us?”

“Just us.” Phichit gave him a winning smile.

***

“I was just informed that we had homework over break,” were the first words Viktor said to Yuuri in two weeks.

“Who told you?” Yuuri tried for a smile.  He wasn’t sure if it worked. Something about seeing Viktor made his chest ache.

Maybe it was his name.

“Professor Vector as I walked in the door,” he said.  “Can I see your answers?”

Yuuri wordlessly passed the work he’d done weeks ago to Viktor, swallowing a ball of worry down his throat.

“Er, really?” Viktor said, holding the parchment completely still in the air, clearly not believing it.

Yuuri waved his hand, hoping he seemed just tired.  “I know you know it all anyway, so what harm can it do?”

“That’s a very un-Yuuri-like thing to say,” Viktor gave him a rewarding smile.

 _Flirt,_ Yuuri thought bitterly.  Maybe a few weeks ago, he would’ve melted over that _look_ Viktor gave him, but right now, nothing seemed to matter.

He was still staring at the desk in front of him, when Professor Vector entered the room, holding new rolls of parchment.

“Today we will be working with partners on the history of the Heart Number in literature.  I would like a partner essay turned in by the time an hour is up, and we will spend the last few minutes of class sharing.  You’ll each be given a different time period and your goal is to interest your classmates as much as possible. I’ll be assigning teams.”

The only time Yuuri was ever glad to hear that statement was when he didn’t have any friends in the class he was in.  But even with Viktor sitting next to him, no, _especially,_ with Viktor sitting next to him, he was overly thankful.

“Viktor and Drusilla,” said Professor Vector.

“Damn,” muttered Viktor and gave Yuuri the third unrequited smile of the day.  “We would’ve killed it.”

“Mhmm,” Yuuri replied, pretending he was listening for his name and couldn’t talk.  He was a little surprised to see Viktor draw back like he was hurt.

“And finally, Isabella, you’ll be working with Yuuri,” Professor Vector finished. “Come up with your partner and choose a scroll!”

Viktor’s chair scraped beside him as he walked to the front of the room, nodding courteously at the Ravenclaw with dark brown hair and bangs.

She blushed.

***

“My favorite salad dressing is definitely French,” sighed Phichit dreamily.  “I used to hate salads but turns out that’s because I hadn’t been eating _real_ salads.  Italian’s definitely a top runner but Ranch is a big no-no.  Really, it reminds me of this one m—”

“You know, if you want me to talk about whatever is bothering me, I can,” Yuuri smiled, poking his fork at the salad.  He hit a cherry tomato, which burst, squirting onto his cloak.

“Were you not enjoying my salad dressing monologue?” Phichit pretended to be hurt.  “Yuuri, you know I’ve been practicing that for _weeks.”_

There was a pause, and then Phichit quieted.

“My dog died.”

Phichit’s face fell instantly.  His fork clattered onto his salad, the handle immediately drowned in French dressing.

“Oh,” he reached to pick up his fork, then thought twice, dropping his hand.  “I’m sorry.” His voice was honest and clear, prompting Yuuri to relax into the conversation.

Before he knew it, tears began to slip down Yuuri’s cheeks.   _Dammit,_ he thought furiously.   _You went almost twenty-four hours without crying and you just_ had _to start picturing his face again and—_

“I’ve had him since I was ten,” Yuuri’s voice was surprisingly level at the start.  “I was kind of a quiet kid and my parents got him for me because they knew I needed a friend, or someone to talk to, someone who I didn’t have to worry about liking me or anything.”

“That makes sense,” Phichit nodded solemnly, his big brown eyes wide and sorrowful.

“When I first got him he was just a puppy.”  This came out as a sniffle and Yuuri bit his lip, then willed himself to keep going.  “And he was my best friend in the whole world. His bed was in my room, and I told him all my secrets, and he would lick my face and jump around when I was sad.”

Phichit reached across the table and grabbed Yuuri’s hand.

“Then when I moved here, I somehow managed without him.  Apparently when I came back, my parents saw me as someone who was different from their son who left.  Even though they knew he had been sick for over six months now, they kept it hidden and never told me.  They didn't want me to get upset. As if it was going to just _go away.”_

Phichit was frowning, like he wanted Yuuri to think twice about reprimanding his parents, probably saying something about how it must have been tough for them too, but he kindly just nodded again, letting Yuuri finish.

And so he told the story, diving into every second of that perfect last day in the markets and by the coast and on the lake.  When he reached Christmas, his cheeks felt like they were on fire.

“I was ready to give up anything in the world for him,” sniffled Yuuri.  “I remember praying to some higher magic and saying that I’d give up Hogwarts and my friends and everything if I could have him for just a little longer.”

“How do you feel?  Now, I mean,” Phichit sipped carefully on one of the two hot chocolates a house elf had brought over to them.  Kindly, she had not given Yuuri a strange look, just bowed and walked back to the other side of the room.

“Sad?” Yuuri shrugged.  “I guess that’s what it is, but it doesn’t feel like it.  It feels like the whole world is muted. As if I’m underwater or something, and every joke or smile takes a decade to reach me so by the time it does, I don’t feel like being happy at all.”

“Surreal?” Phichit asked.

“I guess...yeah, that’s the word,” Yuuri wiped one of his cheeks.  “Like it’ll never get better. But I know it will eventually.”

“You seemed, er, upset, at your parents, earlier while you were telling the story,” prompted Phichit.  “I would be mad in the moment, too, if I found out they were hiding such a secret from me, but do you still feel that way?”

“I guess,” Yuuri said.  “Partly because of that, but also just the way I felt when I got there, like they had forgotten about me or I was now an intruder upon their life.  But mostly, yeah, it was Vicchan. They knew for over a year and didn’t tell me. What if I had spent my last day without Vicchan and never gave him a wonderful day he deserved?”

“Vicchan?” Phichit asked, struggling to place the name.

Yuuri sucked in a breath, half regret and half fear.  He hadn’t meant for the name to slip, but it was too late to backtrack now.

“I—I named my dog Vicchan.”

There was a beat.  Phichit wasn’t stupid, but he also wasn’t cruel.

“Yuuri, it might not be my place to say this, but have you spoken to Viktor at all?  About what happened? I can’t help but believe that you two are great friends, and you seem happy around him, so I can’t see why you wouldn’t.”

“No,” Yuuri shook his head avidly.  “Just no.”

“Is it because of your dog’s name?” Phichit asked gently.

Yuuri stopped to give it real thought, but shook his head again.

“I don’t really think so.  I’m not sure, but it just doesn’t feel right to tell him.  Vicchan is a piece of home, and...Viktor is just...here.” Yuuri was being truthful, to an extent, but the real reason was that he couldn’t shake the feeling that Viktor wanted to hear nothing of his problems.

***

“Unfortunately the esteemed Professor Snape is ill,” was the best sentence Yuuri had heard all week.  Surprisingly, it was Slughorn who spoke, addressing the Potions class. “He asked me to take over today, even though I just saw you all yesterday.”  Slughorn chuckled at this, although there was nothing remotely funny about it.

Iris smiled and leaned her head on Yuuri’s shoulder.

He stiffened.

“He insisted that today we practice making Draught of Peace, which I remind you is a _very_ complex potion.  If not done successfully, the subject could permanently enter a coma.  Of course, we will not be testing it on anyone, as you’re only O.W.L. level students.”  He laughed to himself again. “But I thought that we could make Potions class a little _extra_ interesting today!” He clapped his hands together, waiting for someone to ask.

“What are we doing, Professor Slughorn?” Viktor had a lazy smile on his face, his feet propped up on the chair of the person in front of him, a very indignant Yurio.

“Thank you, Nikiforov!  Ten points to Slytherin…”

Mila cut a foul look at Yuuri, although it didn’t last for long.  No one could hate Slughorn’s cheerful mood, a welcome change to Professor Snape.

“I got some help from the house elves and had them hide the four main ingredients around the castle,” he announced gleefully.  “It’ll be a little scavenger hunt of sorts. You can work with whoever you wish as long as you don’t tell Professor Snape. We all have to be back to the room by the next half hour, so you have a good amount of time.”

Immediately, an excited chatter broke out as chairs clambered.  Yuuri couldn’t help think he would much rather be sitting in a lecture so he wouldn’t have to talk to Iris, but at least he might be able to split up and search with someone else.

“I’m so glad we get to do this together,” Iris tugged on his robe as they got up.  “I love working with you!”

“Yeah,” Yuuri took a breath.  “Me too, Iris.”

She beamed, and he sped up, hopeful to catch up to Viktor, Mila, and Chris who were walking together.  Then, remembering Arithmancy yesterday morning, he suddenly turned.

“Hey, Iris, let’s go with, er...” he scanned the others he knew.  “Yurio and Otabek,” he decided and half ran to catch up to them.

“Okay,” said Iris, sounding a little puzzled.  “Yurio’s nice. He’s on the Quidditch team with me.”

“Yurio!” Yuuri pulled up next to him.  “Good to see you.”

Yurio sighed insufferably.  “Katsudon.”

Otabek hid a smile by lifting up the slip of parchment with the ingredients they needed.

“Hey, Yuuri.  Hi, Iris. I say we check the sixth floor first—I was on my way down from there earlier and saw Slughorn lurking around.  We might be able to find an ingredient or two there.” Otabek suggested, polite as always.

Yuuri was getting a lurking suspicion that he wasn’t the only one who couldn’t stand Iris.

Three flights up and legs already aching (Yuuri told himself the next Quidditch match wasn’t until March and he still had time to get into shape before then), the stairs began to move.

 _“_ _Fuck,"_  Yurio said.

Yuuri grabbed the railing tightly as they swung around, now facing the entrance to the library.  He exchanged a quick glance with Otabek, avoiding Iris’s brown eyes following his every movement.

“We might as well try,” Otabek shrugged, and the quartet tramped into the library.  Madam Pince gave them steely eyes, and Yuuri didn’t doubt she would notice if a hair was out of place.

“Oooh, look!” Iris grabbed Yuuri’s hand and pointed it to the opposite side of the library, where Leo and Guang Hong were reaching into a gap between books and pulling out thick vials.

Yuuri yanked his hand away as kindly as possible.  “Nice eye, Iris,” he forced out.

“Thanks,” she beamed as they walked over, earning scared eyes from a group of second-year girls.  One turned and whispered to her friend, while pointing at the four of them. They giggled, and Iris gave them a disapproving glance, as if she was running the place.

“Excellent,” Otabek said, handing Yuuri one vial.  It was filled with a blinding white powder, just barely dusting the bottom.

“Crushed unicorn horn,” he added.

“Want to hold this?” Yuuri asked with a flash of brilliance, handing it to Iris.  If he got her to hold the ingredients, she wouldn’t be able to keep grabbing his clothes or his hand.

 _“_ _Now_ we can go to the sixth floor,” Otabek nodded towards the stairwell right outside the library that had just moved towards them.

Yuuri’s legs burned as they ran up, step after step, until he realized the sinking feeling that had been in his stomach, persisting for what seemed like forever, was less now.  That had been happening a lot, these days. He would be finally enjoying himself, and then it’d hit him that he was _supposed_ to be mourning, _supposed_ to be mad and upset.

“I see it,” laughed Otabek.  Before he scanned the hall, Yuuri’s eyes lingered on Yurio, a small but sure smile spreading across his face before he wiped it again, just like that.

“Ooh, syrup of hellebore,” Iris said gleefully, grabbing one for the two of them.

“Halfway done,” Otabek crossed the second ingredient off their list, using his knee as a hard surface.  “Any other ideas?”

“Found something?” Chris called out.  He was striding toward them, Mila and Viktor behind him laughing hysterically, their voices bouncing off the marble walls.

“Oh hey, Yurio!  And Yuuri,” Mila said.  “Good to see you too, Otabek.”  Either she had gotten tired of listing names, or she was purposefully leaving someone out.

Thankfully, Iris seemed preoccupied with shaking the syrup of hellebore and watching it change from a light brown to orange hue.

“I was looking for you before we left,” Viktor reached over Yuuri’s shoulder to grab a vial.  “Then Mila kindly informed me you’d already left.”

“Sorry,” Yuuri lied.  A crushing feeling was quickly ruining his mood, even faster than before.  “Yurio and Otabek were already leaving and I wanted to get a head start so we could get as started as soon as possible on the potion.”

“Hmm,” Viktor tapped the vial with his long fingers, then smiled at Yuuri carefully.  It didn’t quite reach his calculating eyes. “Let’s study together after this class, okay?  We haven’t talked in a while.”

“We just had Arithmancy yesterday,” Yuuri protested lifelessly.

“Well if you don’t want to, we don’t have to.”  He frowned. “You know, you’ve been acting quite str—”

“Okay,” Yuuri said quickly.  “I mean, okay, let’s study. I’ll see you later, then.”

This time, he was the one to grab the edge of Iris’s robe and drag her down the hallway, not letting go until they turned the corner and were halfway down the stairs, feeling as if Viktor’s eyes were still on him.

***

“How were your holidays?” Yuuri blurted out as Viktor sat down, dropping his bag and pulling out a piece of parchment.

Viktor looked taken aback.  “It was nice, I suppose. I had Chris stay with me this year to keep me company.  We went sledding nearly every day.” This he said with a smile, starting to recount memories.  “The first day, we went to this cafe that they just built. Their hot chocolate is unworldly, and we probably bought out half the store.”  He laughed, and Yuuri felt a stab of guilt, and then anger for feeling that way.

Although he was close to Mila too, Yuuri assumed Chris was Viktor’s best friend.  Not to mention, he was quite attractive: tall and tanned, only two months younger than Viktor, and those bright green eyes.  They were similar in personality too, both confident and unapologetic, charismatic and flirtatious.

“Anyway, you’ll have to ask him about the girl in the purple coat,” Viktor grinned.  “I don’t think I can tell that story to its full justice.” He must have sensed Yuuri’s silence for an encouragement to go on, because after a slight pause, he kept talking.  “We took Makka out, all over St. Petersburg, since the poor boy’s always locked up inside.”

 _Of course,_ Yuuri thought.  This time the pain was not dull, but a sharp jab.  For a second he felt like the air had been punched out of him, and worried how mental discomfort could cause physical pain.

Seeming to have run out of anecdotes to tell, Viktor gave Yuuri a gentle smile.  “How about you? You went to Hasetsu to see your family, right?”

It took a second for Yuuri to realize he was asking him a question, but when he did, he cleared his throat suddenly.

“Yeah, erm, it was really nice…” he trailed off.  “My sister wasn’t home over summer so it was my first time seeing her in a while.  That was nice,” he tried for a smile. For a terrifying moment, it was rather like spelling a word out so many times that it didn’t even look like a word anymore, and he wondered if he was smiling was wrong.  That was when you curled your lips upwards, right?

“That _is_ really nice,” Viktor replied teasingly.  If he noticed something was wrong, which he definitely did, he was at least kind enough to not show it.  “So you got to see your parents again, right? How was that?”

“It was fine,” Yuuri said with a surprising amount of bitterness.

Viktor looked taken aback by this.  “I see.”

Yuuri shifted his gaze back to the blank piece of parchment in front of him.

Finally, the chair pulled back, and Yuuri wondered for a horrible moment if Viktor was going to just get up and leave, and request to never see him again.  And for that petrifying second, he imagined himself apologizing for acting so weird and begging him to stay, a sense of desperation filling his mind.

But Viktor was just getting up to search through the bookshelf, his back to Yuuri.

As if his mind had been waiting for this, Yuuri’s eyes began to water.  He was filled with discomfort, awkwardness, anger, and despair.

 _You are_ not _crying,_ he commanded himself.  But maybe, it would force him to explain everything to Viktor, and then maybe Yuuri would stop being so distant, and they would go back to normal and—Yuuri sniffed.

“You okay?” Viktor turned around, a dark blue hardcover book in one arm.

To his relief, Yuuri’s cheeks felt dry.  He lifted his chin, hoping the light would not strike his eyes.

“I’m fine.  I think I might be getting sick again, that’s all.”  On a frantic thought, Yuuri got up suddenly, grabbing his bag that he had not even bothered to open and slinging it over his shoulder.  “Actually, I should probably go get some rest. I’m not feeling that well.”

“Yeah, I can tell,” snapped Viktor, intercepting Yuuri three steps from the door.  Softening his voice, he stepped closer so they were only a foot apart, forcing Yuuri to look up at him.  Thankfully, the tears seemed to fall back, retreating rapidly. “Yuuri. I know something’s bothering you and I hate seeing you when only half of you is present.  Tell me what’s wrong. I’ll help you.”

Yuuri felt a cool hand slip into his own and he shivered, his eyes focused on the thin, sharp bridge of Viktor’s nose.  He could imagine spilling, and Viktor reassuring him, being kind as always and maybe even hugging him, telling him everything would be okay.

But he couldn’t.  He couldn’t show that side of himself to Viktor, when he already felt too vulnerable around him.

With as much willpower as he possessed, Yuuri pulled his hand out of Viktor’s.

“There’s really nothing wrong.  I’m just tired and coming down with another cold, as I said.”

He felt like he was walking in slow motion, taking the last few steps to the door and opening it.  He glanced back at Viktor for a second, even though every nerve in his body screamed at him not to.

Viktor was watching him, his face smooth as ever.  “Say whatever you want, Yuuri,” he dropped his hand that was still curled up slightly from taking Yuuri’s.  “But you’re a terrible liar.”

***

“I can’t believe you have a date,” Michele complained.  “Not in a bad way. Like you’re great, but I don’t know anyone who’s _actually_ with someone else on Valentine’s Day.”

“It’s not even Valentine’s Day yet,” Yuuri rolled his eyes, hands buried in his long coat pockets.

“Michele has a point,” Phichit considered.  “Whether you’re single or not, Valentine’s Day always seems to be terrible.”

“What a tragedy,” Michele sighed dramatically.  Then, as both Phichit and Yuuri saw coming, he casually mentioned: “My sister has a date.”

Yuuri smiled under his scarf, looking down at the cobblestone leading into Hogsmeade.  There was a thin layer of dusted snow, just enough to feel Christmassy again.

“Remind me of her name again?” Phichit asked teasingly.  He shot an amused look at Yuuri.

 _“_ _Riley Cabello,"_ Michele said like she was the bane of his existence.  “Virtually perfect. Great Chaser. On the same team as Sara.  Two years older. There’s only one problem.”

“Let me guess,” Phichit laughed.  “She’s dating your sister.”

_"Exactly."_

“Why don’t you want Sara to date anyone?” Yuuri asked for probably the twelfth time.  It wasn’t that Michele was evasive or unclear in his answering, but Yuuri just didn’t quite get the logic.

“Because she’s my _sister,”_ Michele rolled his eyes.  “I don’t want some guy or girl breaking her heart.”

“You can’t just stop her from dating anyone because you’re afraid she’s going to get her heart broken,” Phichit said.  “Then she’ll be forever alone and a thousand times sadder.”

“And she’s probably very capable of defending herself from unwanted suitors,” Yuuri added helpfully.

“She’s gorgeous, though.”  Michele frowned. “That came out weird.  But you know, objectively speaking, if she wasn’t my sister, she’s one of the prettiest girls in the school.  Which means people are going to take advantage of her.”

“She’s also talented and _smart,”_ Phichit reassured him.  “And she’s not going to have you for the rest of her life, so there’s no point in being bitter now.”

“If you say so,” Michele said, unconvinced.  Then, he pointed ahead as they entered the village through the whirl of snow.  “There’s your girlfriend, Yuuri.”

Yuuri kicked savagely at the ground just to get out all the frustration he had before they neared Iris.

“Hey, Yuuri!” she barreled forward, giving him a big hug.

To be fair, Yuuri did think she was pretty, especially with the white snow sticking to her brown hair and on her eyelashes.  She had large, floppy mittens on and a stitched hat that read _Quafflepunchers._

Yuuri was caught up in the irony of her hat, but as soon as he felt Michele slap his shoulder in a very masculine way before walking away with Phichit, he realized he had to spend the next few hours with Iris.

“Where do you want to go?” Yuuri asked cautiously.  She grabbed his hand, and he had no choice but to oblige, thankful for the layers between them.

“Let’s go to Madam Puddifoot’s Tea Shop,” she said adoringly, looking back at him as she dragged him along.  Her smile was glistening, eyes bright and happy, causing a deep ache of pain in Yuuri’s gut.

“Okay,” Yuuri forced cheeriness into his voice.   _For her,_ he told himself.  “It’s where our first date was.”

“Right!” she beamed, as if she was surprised he had actually remembered.

In between moments of silence, Yuuri spotted two Ravenclaws looking to be about fourth years walking with their arms full of bags.  Both of their eyes scanned Yuuri as they passed, and he heard giggles from behind him.

Apparently Iris chose to ignore this, as she asked Yuuri cheerfully if he was going to Chris’s party, which was taking place on his birthday again, coincidentally also Valentine’s Day.

“No,” Yuuri said a little firmer than he had intended.  “I have a lot of homework I’ve been pushing off that needs to be done next week.”

“You _always_ have homework,” Iris whined.  “That, or Quidditch practice.”

“Sorry I’m busy a lot,” Yuuri winced, although he was feeling more sorry for himself than Iris.

“I still think you should go,” Iris said stubbornly, as they neared Madam Puddifoot’s and she held the door open for Yuuri.

To his utter relief, Yuuri didn’t spot anyone he knew.  There were a few people with Hogwarts scarfs, but no one he recognized.

“Are you going?”  Yuuri asked, maybe a little too hopefully.   _Please say yes and meet some other guy you fall in love with and take out on dates who will treat you well.  I won’t be offended if you break up with me._

“Not if you’re not going,” Iris said with much restraint, leading him over to a table for two near the back.  “I don’t want you to think I’m off with some other guy,” she laughed.

“I know you wouldn’t do that,” Yuuri tried to return her level of amusement, although he was regrettably, dead serious.

“You’re really not going, though?”  Iris’s face was crestfallen. “But we had so much fun last year.  That was where we met!”

 _Fun? We danced for ten minutes,_ at least, that had been what Phichit had told him, and Phichit was the most trustworthy, genuine person he knew.

“I know, I know.  I’m sorry.” Yuuri tried to keep his face blank.  “I’m just really busy and I’m sure Chris will host more parties in the future.”  This, at least was truthful. What wasn’t, was that he was not planning on going to any of those either.

“Hmph,” Iris frowned, then brightened all of the sudden again.  The girl was a rollercoaster of ups and downs, except her ups were much more lasting and frequent than her downs.  “Oh! I forgot to tell you. I had the best idea the other day of how we could spend more time together.”

_Great._

“What’s that?”

“Well since you’re always busy studying, I thought we could study together.  Then we’d be getting work done, and we’d be in one another’s company!”

“Oh,” Yuuri started awkwardly.  “Yeah, that’d be nice. I feel like we’d end up talking for most of the time, though.” He laughed, hoping this would distract her from setting up a formal study session.

“Well that’s the point!” her eyes glistened as she leaned forward and pecked his lips.  Yuuri kindly resisted the urge to wipe the sticky feeling of lip gloss off.

“Maybe,” Yuuri smiled.  A frown passed over her face and the guilt hit once again.  She was being so nice and he was—well, he was the uncommitted guy who was leading her on.  The kind of person who made him so scared of being in a relationship. When had he transformed into his own fear?

“I have intensive practices every day after class,” Iris frowned.  “That goes up until the match on the twenty-fourth. Maybe we could meet the day after?”  This time her tone was a little less bubbly, as if she was ready to be let down.

“Sure!” Yuuri exclaimed quickly.  “That would be great.”

Happiness flooded into her features and he immediately felt better.  He could sacrifice some time with her if it meant she stayed satisfied.  “Really?”

“Really,” Yuuri promised.

“You’re the best,” she smiled, then got up.  “I’ll order something for us. You can stay here.”

“Actually I have to use the bathroom,” Yuuri said quickly, standing up as well.  His head was spinning and he felt sick. “I’ll run across the street to the Three Broomsticks.”

“Okay,” she squeezed his hand.  “I’ll see you in a bit.”

As soon as Yuuri made it outside, he felt immediately better, the cool air and wet snow hitting his face.  He trudged into the Three Broomsticks, suspecting Iris might be watching.

“Yuuri!”

It was Viktor, a bright spot in the mahogany walls and bustling movement.

“We were wondering where you were,” he beamed, gesturing to a large booth in the back.  Mila, Chris, Georgi, Anya, Otabek, and Yurio were all sitting with mugs of butterbeer and laughing at something one of them said.  “Come join us!”

Although their recent meetings and classes had been filled with occasional awkward moments, Yuuri had pushed Vicchan to the very back of his mind.  Getting over grief wasn’t too bad as long as you straight up refused to think about it, he had come to realize. Now, he and Viktor were nearly back to normal, and both were making efforts to be nicer to one another.

For a moment, Yuuri pictured just ditching Iris completely, saying he got caught up or couldn’t find her.  He longed for nothing more than to sit down with the rest of his friends and enjoy a good drink with warm conversation.  But he took a deep breath and shook his head.

“Iris is waiting for me,” he explained as casually as possible.  “I need to head back to Madam Puddifoot’s in a second.”

Viktor’s face was immediately wiped cold.  “I see,” he remarked, his voice blank. “I forgot you had a girlfriend.”

Yuuri wasn’t exactly sure what to say so he left his mouth stupidly half open.  “Er, yeah.”

“Well don’t let me keep you then,” Viktor waved his hand carelessly.  “Better get back as soon as you can, otherwise you’ll find her crying about how you won’t hold her hand in public.”

Before Yuuri even had a chance to open his mouth again, Viktor had pushed himself away and was moving against the flow of people back to his table.

 _Move,_ he told himself, knowing just how stupid he looked.  Holding his head high, hoping Viktor was watching him, he walked out of the Three Broomsticks, crossing the small expanse of snowy ground and back into Madam Puddifoot’s.  He spotted Iris with two mugs and a plate of cookies, so he hurried over, sliding back into his seat.

“Hey,” she said happily, nodding towards the cookies.  “I hope you like oatmeal raisin.”

“I do,” Yuuri said.  He even grabbed one to prove it.  “Thanks for paying. I’ll get the next one.”

_The next one._

“Of course,” she giggled.  “My parents always told me to pay for one of the first two dates.  Actually, this is probably a good time to mention I’ve been telling my mum so much about you.”

Yuuri swore his heart stopped for a second, before: “Oh, really?”  
“Yeah,” she gushed.  “She’s really happy for me, and my dad is too.  They want to meet you so bad. I told them maybe over the summer.”  
“Hmm,” Yuuri said as Iris rambled on.

 _We’ve been on two dates and she calls me her boyfriend.  And now she wants me to meet her parents._ Yuuri couldn’t help wondering, while staring at a collection of delicate teacups on the wall, if relationships were really fun or if they all started like this.

***

“It’s Valentine’s Day, bitches.”

Yuuri was realizing, one sentence at a time, that JJ had definitely had too much to drink the night before.  Leo exchanged an amused look with him across the Gryffindor table. There were heart shaped pancakes and disgusting sugared desserts lining every inch of the table, decorated in red and pink and white.

“Are you single this year, JJ?” Mila asked with a knowing, amused glint in her eye.  She, contrary to Yurio and Chris’s prediction, was taking Valentine’s Day quite well, although Yuuri suspected it would all go away as soon as they had Charms with Sara, who was undoubtedly being smothered in gifts by Riley.

“Hopefully not by the end of the day.”  His smile glistened, teeth annoyingly straight and perfect.

“Who’s the lucky girl?” Mila grinned excitedly.  “It’s about time someone I know gets in a relationship.  This year is so dry.”

“Can’t say until she gets my rose,” JJ smiled secretly.  “We’ll find out if she meets me in the Astronomy Tower at midnight tonight.”

Mila pretended to throw up into her cup of hot chocolate, piled with a sickening amount of pink marshmallows.

Suddenly the plates vanished, cleaning the table up instantly.  Mila frowned, hand held out towards where he cup had been.

“Look!” Guang Hong called out excitedly, pointing up as owls began to soar overhead.  “The valentines are coming.”

JJ’s cheeks turned sickly pale, and Yuuri realized the confident Captain was actually _nervous_ about some girl getting his letter.

“Oh, gross,” Mila remarked nonchalantly.  She was staring straight ahead at the Ravenclaw table, where Sara was taking a package off of an owl with a knowing, smitten smile.  Riley sat next to her, or more accurately, sat with Sara practically on her lap. They both had matching heart stickers on their cheeks.

“Oh come on,” JJ rolled his eyes, seeming to have broken from his nervous trance.  “Don’t even bother look at her.”

It was too late, though.  Mila’s face was crestfallen, rare for her constant bubbly personality.  She grabbed her bag and rushed out of the Great Hall without another word.  When Yuuri leaned over to see what she had been seeing, he saw Sara and Riley break away from a kiss, then rest their foreheads together, smiles and happiness plain on their faces.

“Poor Mila,” Guang Hong said sadly.  “I wish Sara knew how much she was hurting her.”

“She’s allowed to date whoever she wants,” JJ said surprisingly defensive.  “Mila just has to get over it.”

“Hasn’t Sara been pretty nasty to her, though?” Yuuri asked, speaking from his own personal experience.  He had been surprised to see Sara act cold and detached towards him in Transfiguration and Charms, clearly because of his friendship with Mila.  He could only imagine how Sara was treating _her._

“I think Mila confessed or something,” Leo leaned in.  “But it was right after Sara started dating Riley, because that was the only time she got the courage.  She was so caught up in the moment that she expected Sara to break up with Riley or something, and Sara got offended that she even suggested that, and they’ve been at odds the whole year, now.”

“I wonder if Sara likes her,” Otabek remarked, despite being quiet for most of the conversation.  “They were really good friends last year, and the year before they talked a lot too.”

“I mean it doesn’t exactly take a genius to tell that Mila’s in love with her,” JJ said flippantly.  “She was pretty obvious, and I think if Sara did like her she would’ve been able to tell and wouldn’t have started dating Riley.”

“You never know,” Otabek said sadly.  “Maybe Riley was the one who asked her out and she figured Mila wasn’t making a move so she might as well have some fun, then it just turned into something more serious.”

“And,” added Guang Hong softly.  “Maybe it was painfully obvious to all of us, but some people are pretty oblivious when it comes to that type of thing.  Sara probably wrote Mila’s friendliness off as just that, and nothing more.”

Yuuri stared down at the table, suddenly sick to his stomach without knowing why.

***

Yuuri felt like he was in a repeat of last year, watching as Professor Vector closed the Arithmancy door and stride to the front with a stack of valentines, including a whole bouquet of roses.

“Viktor, you might as well just take all of these,” she sighed, after reading the third one off as his.  “If there’s anything that’s not yours, just pass it back when we have work time.”

Yuuri couldn’t help but notice Viktor did not bother look at the valentines.  Instead, he opened his bag, smushed chocolate at the bottom and flower petals stuck in his parchment rolls, and shoved the whole stack in.  They stuck out, so he grabbed his wand, muttering a quick spell, and the inside of the bag expanded by a few inches.

“Today I would like to start by telling you all that while it _is_ Valentine’s Day, we are learning some very complex ideas today.  I hope you can all spare looking at your cards from your significant other and instead turn to page 616 of your Arithmancy textbook.”

Yuuri looked back behind them, surprised to see many students ashamedly shove away their cards.  Even Isabella turned red and put away the rose she had been sniffing.

“Start reading by yourself and when you get to the next section, stop.  We’ll start discussing when everyone’s ready.”

Yuuri risked another look at Viktor, who had now given up any effort to be nice and inviting to him ever since Hogsmeade a few days ago.  He couldn’t imagine _why_ Viktor was so upset with him.  After all, Yuuri was just trying to make it through the day, except every day, and neither of them wanted to talk about their feelings.

Yuuri spotted a smudge of chocolate on the back of Viktor’s hand, and he was reminded with a bursting pain of the endless possibilities he had if he ever wanted to date someone.  Yet he discarded every valentine he got without even a glance. Was it really such a burden to be wanted?

***

“You’re coming,” commanded Yurio firmly.

Yuuri groaned, spread haphazardly over an armchair in the Gryffindor common room.  It was mainly empty, everyone either at Chris’s party or upstairs, asleep.

“How did you even get in here?” Yuuri rubbed his eyes, although he was not feeling tired at all.  “I thought you weren’t supposed to go in other House’s common rooms.”

“I guess that’s my fault,” Otabek said, walking down the stairs, although he didn’t look ashamed.  “I gave him the password so we could go down there together.”

Yurio shot Yuuri a superior look, arms still crossed haughtily.  “You are _not_ going to sit here on _Valentine’s Day_ all alone reading a book on Ancient Runes, when there’s a fantastic party going down seven floors below us.”

“I told Iris I wasn’t going,” Yuuri defended himself, although he felt a dread tinge at his feelings as he mentioned her.  The two had exchanged Valentine’s presents during lunch. Yuuri gave her last-minute chocolate, which looked a little lame compared to the hand knit scarf she had given him, and a card about how much she enjoyed spending time with him.

“Yeah, and you also hate dating her, so that means nothing.” Yurio snapped, pulling out his wand and Summoning Yuuri’s book.

“Hey!” Yuuri got up, holding his hand out.  “I have an essay to write by first block tomorrow.”

“Liar,” Yurio snapped, although he handed the book back.  “We have Ancient Runes together, you shithead. The essay isn’t due until March, and frankly, the fact that you’ve already started researching for it is appalling.  Now since you’re up already, go get something to wear and come back down. We’re not leaving without you.”

Yuuri shot Otabek a pathetic look, although he was already becoming convinced.  He would just have to pop in for a few minutes, maybe get something to eat, and once he lost Yurio and Otabek, he could leave easily.  Iris wouldn’t know he went, and he wouldn’t be tempted to drink like last year.

“Fine,” he said, grabbing his parchment of notes.  “I’ll be down in a second.”

***

“Honestly I think you’re crazy for not coming earlier,” Yurio said loudly, although it was the only way he could be heard over the music.  “Last year was so fun. Don’t you agree, Otabek?”

Instead of answering, Otabek just flashed him a rare smile, and the two gazed at each other for a knowing second before wiping the expressions off of their faces and turning back to Yuuri.

“Aren’t you going to dance with someone, or something?” Yurio snapped.  “You’re at a party, you know.”

“No,” Yuuri said firmly.  “Last year I danced with someone and ended up dating them.”

“And you’re not happy with how that turned out?” asked Otabek at the same time that Yurio laughed.

“Oh, you did a _lot_ more than dance.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Yuuri asked, straightening the collar of his white dress shirt.  He had gone as casual as possible, but not so casual that he would stand out.

“Nothing,” Otabek said in a strange voice.  “Hey, do you know where the food table is, Yurio?”

“It’s in the back,” Yurio said in a bored voice, his green eyes scanning the room.  After a second, he turned to look at Otabek. “Actually, I’ll take you there. Yuuri you can stay here.  We’ll come back in a moment.”

Before Yuuri could protest, the two pushed themselves away, and they were lost in the dark lighting.  A second later, Yuuri felt a hand grab his shoulder.

He flinched, twisting away to come face to face with—Viktor.

“What are you doing here?” Viktor asked, his voice strange.  He had a loose black tie on and a white dress shirt, strands of hair pasted to his forehead with sweat.  His eyes were hard to look at in the dark light, but Yuuri didn’t need to see them to know what they looked like.

“Am I not invited?” Yuuri replied snappishly, more so than he had meant.

“You shouldn’t be here,” was all Viktor said as he grabbed his hand and dragged him across the dance floor towards a side room.

As soon as Viktor shut the door, Yuuri’s eardrums pounded thickly in the sudden silence.  He felt his eyes adjust as he made the shape of two beds and a pile of clothes.

“What are _you_ doing?” Yuuri asked loudly, still used to the loud music, now muted.  He felt dizzy, like he had drunk some firewhiskey, although he knew he had not touched the drinks table at all: he hadn’t even gotten a chance.

“You’re not supposed to be here,” Viktor repeated in an agitated voice.  He must have grabbed out his wand, because a second later, a torch flickered alive on the wall behind Yuuri.  He could now see Viktor clearly, although his face was still lined with shadows, under his sharp nose and delicate eyelashes.

“You already said that,” Yuuri snapped, more annoyed than ever.  As if Viktor could tell him what to do. “Are you going to explain or can I go back in there, now?

Viktor seemed to pick up on his aggressive mood, and now his face turned hostile too.  “I just thought you would’ve learned from last year,” he said coolly, folding his arms.

“There’s nothing wrong with _having fun,”_ Yuuri shot back, remembering the girls at Slughorn’s party that Viktor had been deliberate to ignore.

“Well, while you might not think so,” said Viktor angrily, “I think there’s a problem when you get half naked and pole dance in front of half the school.”

“I’d never do that,” Yuuri retorted angrily.  “I wasn’t even planning on staying that long.”

Viktor let out a very harsh laugh.  “No one told you?”

“Told me _what_ exactly?

“You haven’t noticed how people look at you?  Where everyone knows you from?” Viktor’s eyes were burning darkly.  “You didn’t think Quidditch made you _that_ popular, did you?”

“What do you mean?” Yuuri snapped back.  What else could anyone know him from, besides Quidditch?  Maybe just being friends with Viktor, after all, the whole school knew him…

“Chris’s party.  Last year,” Viktor said in a superior tone.  “When you, you know, stripped and put on a show for everyone.”

Yuuri was always one to be speechless in the rare moments in time where he needed a comeback.

This was one of them.

“Or do you not know?” Viktor continued, pressing each word into him like a dull knife.

“I…” Yuuri’s head was spinning.  He could no longer hear the music, although his heart was pounding loud enough to fill the apparent silence.  A second later, another heavy track started and people cheered.

“I think you should go,” Viktor said, deadly calm.  “Before you embarrass yourself again, like last year.  Go find your _girlfriend_ and tell her you’re leaving.”

 _Iris,_ Yuuri thought with sudden guilt.  If he really had done what Viktor had said, then he must have been leading her on since the very beginning.  Now that he thought about it, the only thing that could explain her infatuation with him afterward was that they had done more than dance.  Probably kissed, and _Oh God...my first kiss was with a girl while I was drunk and I have no memory of it._

“Iris isn’t here,” Yuuri blurted out, keeping his voice from trembling.  He ignored the flash of surprise that Viktor’s carefully controlled face couldn’t hide, and felt a rush of satisfaction.  “But you’ve made it very clear in the last few days that you don’t want me anywhere that you are, so I’ll leave,” he snarled.

“Yuuri,” Viktor said, suddenly sounding very worried, “I—”

Yuuri shut the door behind him.  He was shaking and soaked with sweat, but he wasted no time as he pushed through the crowd, eyes burning as he refused to take his eyes off of the green candle above the exit.

***

“It’s okay.  Really, Phichit,” Yuuri said for the fiftieth time.  He had to speak a little louder than he would’ve liked, thanks to the buzzing of the crowd in the Quidditch pitch.  Although it had been nearly two weeks since the party, nearly two weeks since Yuuri asked Phichit about what had _really_ happened last year, and nearly two weeks since Phichit broke down and told him he hadn’t meant to lie, but he thought it would be better and he realized he made a mistake, he was still apologizing.

“I feel terrible,” Phichit moaned.  “I thought I was, like, protecting you or something which is _so_ stupid because you don’t need protecting.  And like, I thought everyone would forget about it, after all, I was one of the few people who _wasn’t_ drunk that night.  And I never thought _You Know Who_ would use it against you.”

Yuuri moved his legs so that a group of boys could squeeze past them to the last few seats in their row.

Phichit had taken to using vague terms towards Viktor, although Yuuri could tell he didn’t hate him.  In fact, he had been quite defensive of Viktor’s behavior, saying that the two were just having communication issues and Yuuri’s grief was getting in the way of their friendship.  When Yuuri had inquired how this worked, since he had managed to successfully push Vicchan to the back of his mind by now, Phichit rambled on about some Muggle psychologist called Freud who specialized in unconscious memories.

That was, until Yuuri had admitted to how Viktor had been that night, which turned the conversation completely around to Phichit coming up with ways to get revenge.

Yet no matter how much he wanted to,  Yuuri could not bring himself to hate Viktor.  After all, he’d told him the truth, not in the nicest way, but he had saved him from embarrassing himself again, and…

Phichit, of course, had told him this was nonsense, but suggested wearily after Yuuri’s constant protest that maybe they should talk it through if he really wanted to continue being his friend.

The answer was yes, obviously.

“Phichit, the only thing that could make me hate you is if you keep bringing this up,” Yuuri said.  “We’re over it. Done.”

Phichit put out his lower lip and gave him a winning face.  “Fine. No more mentions of He Who Must Not Be Named.”

Yuuri bit back a smile.

Just in time, Madam Hooch began to announce the players, and Michele leaned over to them.

“Who are you rooting for?”

“Slytherin,” Yuuri said immediately.  “Yurio deserves to win.”

“I forgot you guys were friends,” Michele wrinkled his nose.  “And Iris is on the team, too, I guess. Personally, I hope Ravenclaw wins, although I’m conflicted because I want Sara to do well, but I also want Riley to _not_ do well.”

Phichit laughed, hitting Michele lightly in the arm.  “Give the girl a break. She’s a nice person.”

Michele was about to open his mouth and retort, but Madam Hooch’s voice cut into the crisp February air.

“Cabello has already got the Quaffle, that girl is headed straight for the goalposts, but—OH!  Nice interception there, Eliot, and...she SCORES!”

The Slytherins cheered, and Yuuri watched as Iris did a victory lap around the stadium, her light brown hair flowing freely behind her in a loose ponytail.

“Slytherin seems like they’re on top of things today,” Phichit said, his eyes darting back and forth.  He was right, Yuuri realized, watching as Arthur Rook effortlessly blocked a goal from Riley, who was usually the star player.  The Quaffle was already back to the Slytherins, who were moving effortlessly as a team.

Yuuri hoped JJ was taking notes.

“Slytherin scores again!” yelled Madam Hooch.  Just about every house but Ravenclaw cheered. From Yuuri’s experience last year, the Ravenclaws had apparently been winning the Cup for a while, causing everyone else to support anyone but them.

“I can’t believe it!” hissed Phichit, pointing at Rook who blocked the Quaffle.  It flew into the arms of Iris, whirling around on her broom and not even bothering to make it halfway down the field before throwing a textbook picture toss.  The Quaffle soared through the middle hoop with no opposition.

“I can’t tell if Slytherin is doing really well or Ravenclaw is doing poorly!” yelled Michele, who had now seemed to have made the choice of wishing poorly upon Riley rather than wishing the best for Sara’s team.

“Slytherin hasn’t won a match since last year, either!” Yuuri said, joining everyone else in standing up to see better.

“Slytherin is up to fifty, Ravenclaw at ten…” Madam Hooch trailed off as Riley sped down the field, Quaffle in hand.

“OUCH!” Madam Hooch shouted, jumping up and down, her silver hair a bright spot against the other side of the crowd.

One of the Slytherin Beaters had flung a vicious Bludger at Riley, knocking her nearly to the ground.  She fumbled for a second, grabbing the broom as she fell, the Quaffle a fingertip away before—

“Slytherin has the Quaffle AGAIN!”

“Unbelievable,” muttered Phichit under his breath.  “What training regimen have they been doing?”

“Honestly,” laughed Yuuri.  He felt light and happy, adrenaline coursing through him.  Slytherin was now up seventy points, and he could see the glee evident in their movements, flashes of emerald taking extra loops and high fiving one another as they passed.  They were holding off, waiting for Yurio to end it, he realized, and felt a rush of hope for the younger boy.

“And Slytherin scores again!” Madam Hooch shouted, so loudly that Yuuri wondered if she even needed her wand to magnify her voice anymore.

“I hope Sara doesn’t take this too hard,” Michele grinned, as if he’d already determined the fate of the game.  “Not like it’s her fault the Keeper and Chasers aren’t doing well, but if she doesn’t swoop in soon, Slytherin could probably win without even getting the Snitch.”

“That’s what happened last year, right?” Yuuri asked.  He remembered watching Michele catch the Snitch, even though Slytherin had been hundreds ahead.

“Yeah,” Michele shook his head, eyes still glued on the game ahead of them.  “We knew we couldn’t win going into that, and it got to the point where Slytherin was just racking up points.”  
“Thankfully you brought Gryffindor to victory,” Phichit flashed Yuuri a smile.  “What an iconic game.”

“Slytherin leading over Ravenclaw by ninety points!” Madam Hooch announced, rocking on the balls of her feet.

“If they keep this up in the match against us in a few months, I’m going to be terrified.  They could also be in line to win the Cup,” Phichit said, head raised up high so he could see Riley and Iris intercept again, wrestling for the Quaffle.  Riley came away with the red ball clutched to her chest, but the crowd saw as a Bludger flew towards her with no help from the Ravenclaw Beaters, a good fifty feet away.

Yuuri winced as she was smacked on the cheek and flew backward, the Quaffle falling out of her arms, ready for a Slytherin Chaser to swoop below and grab.  Half the stadium was sympathetic groans, and the other half delighted cheers.

“A nasty hit, but Cabello’s already back and flying,” Madam Hooch said, to the disdain of Michele.

“You’ve got to give Riley one thing,” Phichit grimaced, as they all watched as she sped after two players in green.  “She has some guts.”

“Or low pain tolerance,” Michele said, causing Phichit and Yuuri to share an amused look.

“Two Bludgers headed for the Seekers!” announced Madam Hooch, and every student’s heads simultaneously turned up, where Sara and Yurio were flying at dizzying heights, no doubt freezing.  The sky was a brilliant bright blue, and Yuuri squinted hard, trying to see if anyone had spotted the Snitch.

He held his breath, begging Yurio to see something and pivot around in his broom to race after it.  Yuuri could tell he was losing confidence fast, having not caught the Snitch in any of the matches before.

But instead, it was Sara who dived down, a Bludger tailing her.  She was flying sharply towards the ground, hand outstretched and Yuuri witnessed multiple things happen at once.

First, one of the Slytherin Beaters hurled her bat towards Riley at an alarming speed.

Second, as Sara dodged from the bat, the Bludger tailing her caught up, ramming straight into the back of her broom, causing a splintering sound, but propelling her forward faster.

And third, as Yuuri craned his neck up, he saw Yurio holding his hand out, fist in the air, with the unmistakable golden Snitch fluttering in between the fingers of his thick black gloves.  There was a rumble of confusion, and then an overwhelming wave of applause and cheers.

Yuuri plugged his ears, although he could still hear Phichit screaming next to him:

“Sara was faking!”

“Yurio caught the Snitch!”  Yuuri yelled out loud. “He really caught it!”

He forced himself to look up against the sun and watched as the Slytherin team sped up to Yurio who was making his way down and collided together, a cluster of green in the sky.

***

The school was still buzzing with excitement the day after the match, and Yuuri left dinner in the Great Hall a few minutes earlier than usual to meet Iris in an empty classroom so they could study.  This time, he was actually excited to see her and congratulate her on the staggering win.

Pacing back and forth with a smile on his face on the second floor, he heard footsteps and turned around, animated.

“Iris!”  He surprised himself by opening his arms up to welcome her into a hug.

Slowly, he dropped his arms as she stopped, clenching her books to her chest.  Her face was serious and firm, which was a first.

“What’s wrong?”  The bag on his shoulder was starting to dig into his skin.

“I think we need to have a small talk,” she stepped forward cautiously, and this time he didn’t try to embrace her.

“Why?” Yuuri asked, his palms already sweating.  Had he done something? “What happened?”

Her pink lips opened, and closed shakily.  Then opened again.

“I think we should break up.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the last line, aka the moment where everyone goes THANK GOD  
> 1\. yikes they are so....hormonal in this. this _is_ tagged as a slow burn tho lol  
>  2\. omg literally i thought i lost all my readers last time but i woke up the morning after i published chapter 7 and had like 5 emails and it was just so nice reading them all. seriously makes my day  
> 3\. thank you so so so so much for continuing to read this! i'm really trying to upload more. i love all your comments <3 let me know ur favorite moments!  
> preview: _people started talking / putting us through our paces / i knew there was no one in the world who could take it / i had a bad feeling_


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